Regular Relationship Struggles vs Toxic Patterns: Discerning the Difference

Рет қаралды 18,946

4 ай бұрын

In today's episode, I'm going to breakdown the key distinctions between troubled and toxic relationships so you can discern the difference between who to hang in there with and who to let go of.
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Пікірлер: 69

@Kris_Reece 4 ай бұрын

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

@mayruthuganda1910 2 ай бұрын

They don't value you for who you are they value you for what you do

@gwendolynwehage6336 4 ай бұрын

Thank you!!! I have had that verse quoted to me more times than I can count, "only God knows the heart." My answer to them was what God said: "you shall know them by their fruit", bad fruit is the opposite of the fruit of Christ. The fruit of the Spirit of God is "love, joy, peace, gentleness, kindness and self-control." These are the character qualities of Christ, if someone does not have this fruit they do not belong to God.

@marco13mag 4 ай бұрын

Amen! Before that relationship I had all the fruits but than 3 months in the bad fruits from that person was effecting me and rubbing off of me. To the point to where it was making me sick. And I never wanted to be around the person.

@enojelmeli 4 ай бұрын

This!! "A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. Matthew 7:17-18 This was the litmus test I used for my ex. Nice guy with a good heart but he was very troubled. His baby mama? Toxicity personified. With their traits combined... 😬 I just praise the Lord for getting me out and away from their perpetually problematic lives. He is truly a Savior. 🙌🏾

@vivainvestparaguayvivainve2321 3 ай бұрын

Thank you! I made a screen shot of your comment.

@deannamartinez7233 Ай бұрын

AMEN!!!!! So TRUE!!! In JESUS Name AMEN And Amen!!!!! 🙌❤️✝️🤗🥰

@CrystolynMacklin 4 ай бұрын

"Stop absorbing and start observing." 👌🏽

@AS-gf5jn 4 ай бұрын

Yup just sit back and watch the games while being a grey rock. Eventually they flee. They need action, drama, and poo poo to fuel their toxic addictions.

@RominaBetgevergiz 4 ай бұрын

Can you please make an episode of toxic parents and siblings

@Godgirl42 4 ай бұрын

You have no idea how helpful this is right now I’ve been sitting back and observing his reactions and behaviors. He has some serious serious issues and I have no idea how I’m gonna deal with this long-term. It’s already been 14 years.

@Kris_Reece 4 ай бұрын

I'm so glad it was helpful

@debbiephillips3017 4 ай бұрын

This was good to hear. The Holy Spirit helped me throughout my toxic relationship. I ended up divorcing the person when I realized the person I married was just trying to get my house and land. He married the lady before me and had her locked up in his place until one day the neighbor helped her to escape. He took her for 280,000. She's ended up in a nursing home which was much safer for her. I learned about this much later after being with him. Being in that toxic relationship taught me valuable lessons. The Holy Spirit showed me the truth about the person. I thought he was troubled when he was actually toxic and dangerous. God kept me safe! I am no longer gullible. 10:13 I listen to what people are saying, but pay close attention to their fruit. My ex would say one thing but do a different thing. I'm happy being single and having God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit in my life. I don't need a man. God is enough for me.

@loischan8551 4 ай бұрын

Thank you Kris for your timely video. Another emotional outburst this morning and i'm just hanging in there for the right time. Thank God for sending you into my life. It always helps me stand guard and put me back in perspective again and be firm and not soft hearted, knowing he will never change unless God works a miracle in his life. 😪

@melodyjane71 2 ай бұрын

Praying for you.

@aysebol4179 4 ай бұрын

I like the way you list and explain. And especially with scripture.

@considerthebirds Ай бұрын

Interestingly the toxic person I’m dealing with would say I am everything talked about here.

@Crazynchrist24 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for this insight. I’m in the wilderness of healing and my eyes are open and you’re always spot on. May God continue to bless you and your ministry 😘

@denisegauci832 4 ай бұрын

Short vid of essential tips for keeping at bay extremely selfish people out of your life. Thank you Reese. Remain blessed and highly favored

@DawnietotheMax 4 ай бұрын

3:09 and 6:5 says Carry your own load. We can sometimes carry their burden but they must carry their own load.

@susanlongsine9022 9 күн бұрын

So glad my friend in "Christ" sent your website to me! I've gone to other narcissistic sites, but not according to God's word..I live in a very lonely existence with an unbeliever. Bc of my health I remain under the same roof. But am dealing with a real winner! He can't do anything wrong. No compassion whatsoever 😢 God is my refuge and fortress. He's good at calling me names. Have to be mindful of my triggers. TY for your videos.. God bless you 🙏✝️🎶😊

@traceyjude1 3 ай бұрын

His apology was sincere but timing was awful. He got caught. Then he justified by throwing it back on me. Then later apologized. I’m still discerning and observing and having none of his BS. Thank you Kris for helping me see there may be hope. Troubled, I can work with. Time will tell. I see with new eyes now.

@sherrilynn8043 3 ай бұрын

What a great comparison, great video, thanks for all you do :) God Bless!!

@celinechauvet1067 4 ай бұрын

Completely true ! Personnally, I fled from the toxic person. God bless you !

@makeupbyahshia 2 ай бұрын

Every step sounds as if you live in my home and see exactly what's going on.Wow!!!!

@blueskiesforever114 4 ай бұрын

Thank u Kris! You are awesome and much appreciated ✝️💗🙏

@fisherofmen9212 4 ай бұрын

Thanks, Kris. This gives me discernment about how we got here after 26.5 years and gives me hope for further improvements in our marriage.

@Horizon25 2 ай бұрын

Thanks for this

@michelleglover2045 13 күн бұрын

This is good stuff!!!

@vivainvestparaguayvivainve2321 3 ай бұрын

I'm new to this channel. I like the way Kris teaches. And I read a lot of comments here. I didn't found much hate and darkness. Thies are the fruits of Kris's tree. May it grow!

@FoundLamb 2 ай бұрын

All I can say is… yup…

@abbasjoy4785 13 күн бұрын

I lovethis!!! ❤

@petagreeranch3606 4 ай бұрын

DID NOT CLARIFY MYSELF..YES MARRIED FEELING ALONE,,,GAVE ALL I HAVE TO GIVE...FEEL USED...REALIZE NOT THE ONLY ONE IN THIS KIND OF SITUATION.... IT DOES NOT MATTER IF YOU ARE A MAN/WOMAN... STAY STRONG IN THE LORD....FOR IN SOME WAY I AM BLESSED WITH POSSESSIONS JUST NO FRIENDSHIPS.. A LONE IN A MARRIAGE.. TD

@KM-zb9eg 3 ай бұрын

Sending love your way .

@robina3443 4 күн бұрын

🙏🏾🔯💪🏾✝️💯🕊️

@MidlifeMakeoverMovement 3 ай бұрын

I love this explanation. Thank you so much.

@nancykummen1805 4 ай бұрын

Thanks so much for your help. You are so right on 👍

@ninamars357 4 ай бұрын

Thanks, Kris. Appreciate all your videos!

@LindaStokes-ff2kv 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for this ❤

@itschriscolin 4 ай бұрын

These videos are so excellent. Thanks Kris

@TYGZus777 4 ай бұрын

My pot-stirring SIL, of almost 40 years, told me over my dying brother's bed that we were the weirdest family she had ever met and after my brother died she never wants to have anything to do with us again. And that she was not going to let us be any part of his funeral business. She had literally stopped talking to us up to that point, telling our dying brother that we were mad at her??? Then, when my brother died, she went around crying to everyone that we weren't there for her. After smearing my nuclear family's reputation to everyone, I finally reached out to her to remind her of all of her violent words to me on the day of my brother's death. To which she replied: "I don't appreciate having words put in my mouth." ???!

@jennifercooper3812 4 ай бұрын

She must be a gaslighter

@HlseMdce 3 ай бұрын

Thank you from Switzerland 🇨🇭 This video helps me discerning between troubled/toxic people 🙏🏼

@carmenmangion4652 4 ай бұрын

Thankyou so much I m learning . I finished with him

@marvthedog1972 4 ай бұрын

thanks for your videos. They are very informative, well thought out in presentation and offer a very grounded biblically based approach to the topics you address. They have helped me a great deal to begin the healing process after the 5 year custody battle with my covert narc ex wife and a recent betrayal of trust from someone at work i considered a best friend. They've also helped me realize some of my own codependent traits I need to work on. thank you

@AAA34FL448 Ай бұрын

So true

@oghenetegaisrael2889 4 ай бұрын

Many thanks 🎉

@joybertino5847 4 ай бұрын

How do you get rid of your toxic, financially, emotionally abusive husband when they hold all the financial cards and everything is in your name not there's and my son and I have no where to go and my salary is below poverty?

@sharonmcgillivray2119 4 ай бұрын

11:10 Pray to God for guidance, you can do this in your mind as only God will know and can read your thoughts. Praying for you and your situation ❤ God will make a way where there seems to be no way 1 Corinthians 10: 13 Hope it helps

@VlogsbyARE 4 ай бұрын

Girl, you just gotta pray everyday to God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost to help you in any way shape or form. Then save up money however you can. I'm in the same boat as you and that's the best advice I can give. Anchor everything into God's hands. God bless sister and have faith.

@PracticalChristianWarfare 4 ай бұрын

there are legal sources of assistance out there and women’s shelters to assist you with somewhere to stay. do some research. talk with a lawyer who has experience. i pray God go before you and put the right people in your path. 🙏

@JadeForth-cu4lu 3 ай бұрын

Bang on boy I need help right now

@marjattaelliott1158 4 ай бұрын

Halleja I start observing, thank you for this video, it was so helpful. I am married with a toxic clergy man. May God help me to speak the truth with love come what will.❤🎉😅😢

@pinaytunay Ай бұрын

i wish i knew all these. huhuhuhu!

@JayThaSpeaker 4 ай бұрын

Amen

@pausesiponder 2 ай бұрын

Do you have videos that help Newley Christian engaged couples? And setting boundaries during the planning and before the wedding?

@ineveryseason 4 ай бұрын

💯

@genegant998 4 ай бұрын

26 years old step daughter is emotionally emerged into her mother, my wife, stepdaughter purchased a house and still staying in my home and consuming her mother my wife

@relaxcalmly1742 3 ай бұрын

Help! I’m so confused.. my husband cheated 5 years ago. I fought and stood for the marriage and he eventually came back. I’m the Christian, he isn’t. The response my husband tells me each time is he is sorry. He will hug me gently when he realize how hurt i am. But throughout the years of him saying he want to make it work, he hasn’t ever initiate any kind of work for our marriage. He kept saying he is trying and uses he works and he tries to take us out, etc. I have already addressed that those arent the resolve to the pain i have. I’m not recovering after 5 years of pain. When i would be frustrated through the years, we would argue and he has used words that imply that i need to get over it or that he will get there. As a Christian wife, i have tried to save the marriage all this time. But i am so tired now and i lost all my desire for the marriage or him. Help me understand if in am going to be judged by God if i leave him please?

@vicnoid1 2 ай бұрын

As I understand the Bible you can divorce coz of infidelity, he isn’t a Christian the Bible says if a non Christian wants to stay either the Christian spouse then do so but if they don’t (cheating husband is showing he does not ) u can divorce

@stephanieboyer8439 10 күн бұрын

U r free to go. He broke his covenant with u. It's OK to love him as a fellow creation of the Lord but not love him as ur husband anymore. The Lord came to set the prisoners free. Ur husband poor choice can b used to set u free.

@relaxcalmly1742 Күн бұрын

@@vicnoid1 Thank you. It’s a good perspective that I failed to realize. He doesn’t seem to really want me. Actions speaks louder than words. He first cheated and then didn’t truly show me I can trust him again.

@relaxcalmly1742 Күн бұрын

@@stephanieboyer8439 Thank you. I have decided to do so now. Time - wise, I have a bit more to lose than he does. We don’t have any children, and now that I’m in my mid 30s, biologically, I suffer more as I may not be able to be a mother. I felt robbed of 5 years (since he cheated) and now I will have to find peace and healing from this. As the one who was betrayed, I shouldn’t be the one leading the repairs. Perhaps he doesn’t really love me. I feel i sacrificed so much.

@lorimehok1645 4 ай бұрын

I think that I may have multiple toxic people in my life . Please provide information on how to put on some PPE when dealing with the toxic person . Is it as simple as putting on the armor of God daily?? I am referring to relationships that should not be stopped altogether. Example: toxic child that has my grandchild. Thanks so much!!

@Plans4YouJer2911 4 ай бұрын

Male here My X wife has all of these We are divorced Never wanted this divorce Hope she finds whatever she is looking for or whomever she is looking for

@carmenmangion4652 4 ай бұрын

Evil for me everthing he have axakly god is with me