I used to work in a Helium Gas production factory. The boss there still speaks very highly of me.

“broke a mirror that’s supposed to be 7 years bad luck but my lawyer thinks he can get me 5”

"Everywhere's walking distance if you have the time" Those are words to live by.

I saw Steven years ago in Pittsburgh. My favorite joke of his of all time: "I like to tease my plants...so I water them with ice-cubes."

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood outside and sang Happy Birthday. -Steven Wright

Showed this to my girlfriend of seven years..she didn't laugh one time..I think it's over

I had an uncle who worked for Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus, and when he died all of his friends went to the funeral in one car. - Steven Wright

I went to a restaurant. It said "breakfast any time." I ordered pancakes during the Renaissance.

"If I melt dry ice can I swim without getting wet?" Hall of fame joke

He is among the best one-liner comics ever.

There is only one Steven Wright. Sheer brilliance.

I'm not a prude or easily offended at all but it's so refreshing to see a comedian telling jokes that don't just rely on racial humour/stereotypes/"edgy" shock value, "it's funny because I shouldn't be laughing" crap. Can be done well enough but rarely and it gets old fast.

I always liked " I live at the end of a one way street. I can't get out"

I saw him live around 8 years ago and i haven't laughed that loud and that long for years. Brilliant man.

"I'm a peripheral visionary. I can see into the future but only way off to the sides."

“6,000 ants dressed up as rice and robbed a Chinese Restaurant” OMG, in tears.🤣

Brilliant. Just brilliant. He kills it every time.

"It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it." I've been laughing ever since.

My favorite was when he just pauses & says " *I lost a button hole..... Where am I going to get a button hole....* " 😂

" I've been selected for jury duty, it's kind of an insane case, 6000 ants dressed up as rice and robbed a Chinese restaurant."

The king of cerebral comedy from ( of course ) Massachusetts! You are a legend Steven!

I revisit this video every couple weeks. I feel like it humbles me.

He certainly carved out a very unique style of comedy and success for himself. The guy is hysterical.

He doesn’t get heckled because people are too busy trying to get his jokes.

I've been selling used tampons as tea bags for vampires.

His delivery is impeccable. So dull contrasting the outlandish statements. It scratches my ear and funny bone so much, I love it. I also find it amusing to see which of his jokes are relatable these days.

I woke up and everything in my house was replaced with an exact replica!

I forgot to go to the gym today... that's 3 years in a row now.

steven wright enriches my life

The verbal equivalent of Gary Larson.

Steven Wright - One of the best stand up comedians alive.

I love all his jokes...they're all so clever. I can't pick a favorite.

this man indirectly invented weird twitter

"Sometimes you can't hear me, it's because that I'm sometimes in parentheses."

One time my father and I had coffee and pastry in a crowded coffee place and this man was there and shared our table. I was really young child and didn’t yet realize who he is.

It's the material, the face and the voice. Comic perfection. He's Lewis Carroll meets Henny Youngman.

His deadpan delivery just makes his jokes all the funnier.

Oh I’m so glad this came up in my feed. I forgot about this guy and how good he was. ❤

He went 90 miles per hour. We all got speeding tickets. TOO FUNNY!

I think he's hilarious! Very dry sense of humor and it's funny to watch him try not to laugh. I saw him in Vegas years ago too. I guess some people just don't get him....he does it w/o being raunchy too.

"I broke a mirror in my house and you're supposed to get seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five...."

"For the audience, it's like I'm changing the subject every five seconds, but to me, my shows are like a 90 minute song that I know exactly. I wrote every note, and I know exactly where everything is." ∼ Steven Wright

i love how he puts his hand on his forehead as a nervous reaction to DYING to laugh, very human.

I love how the lucky audience genuinely laugh out in appreciation to Steven's witty humour.

Absolute comedic genius

Stephen Wright hardly ever cracks a smile when he does his comedy. I noticed that he did it a few times in this video.😂😂😂

The parenthesis one was so subtly awesome

A true innovator. He invented the surreal, one liners later used by Mitch Hedburg, Dimitri Martin and many others.

This man is a genius

There once was a lady named Bright / Who traveled far faster than light / She left one day / In a relative way / And returned the preceding night.

Last night I dreamed I was asleep, then I awoke - and found I really was asleep.

He’s a comedic genius!

Very very clever man. Deserved much more kudos than what he got. But hey, it`s the world we live in. The joke about the short story in which a photographer goes completely insane trying to take a close-up of the horizon is my fav joke ever.

He makes it look effortless. Quentin Tarantino should have put him in a movie.

Tears running down my cheeks, comedy on acid , deadpan delivery supreme, this was unbelievably funny I'm ready for part two now ! Heard of him before, fishing line joke was pretty famous back then, but never knew he was this good..brilliant , just brilliant

One of my favourite comedians, would love to see him live

I never knew the guy on the couch did standup

"depression is merely anger without enthusiasm." Steven Wright Happy 66 Steven ! 🙂

He's the funniest comedian I've ever heard! No one is as clever as he is. No cursing, no 'shocking' jokes, no shouting, just incredibly bizarre stuff that makes you think, then laugh.

damn, it must be torture for steven to keep from laughing during his set

I put freeze dried coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. I put a skylight in my apartment. The people above me are furious.

one of the greatest comedians of all time

Thank you for uploading this!!! This is my favorite standup special from steven. he truly is the grandfather of standup comedy.

I bought batteries but they're weren't included, so I had to buy them again! The genius of double entendre's and plays on words.

Sometimes I see a bit of this guy in in Mitch Hedberg's standup, I wonder if he was a fan. 2 of the best ever.

just finished reading the dictionary. turns out the zebra did it.

Compared to his debut on Carson, a few bits the same, here the timing is honed to perfection.

My uncle was a weird guy, artificial legs....real feet.

First time I saw this guy on TV I thought he looked like Robbie Krieger of the Doors. lol

so love the," got a job as a proof reader for a sky writing company" lmfao and the etch a sketch one also :)

Agree with Far Side reference, and difficulty picking a favorite. Wonder if Gary and Steven knew each other. I’ll bet they at least appreciated each other. My favorite Steven Wrightism: Have you ever tried to imagine a world with no hypothetical situations?

Yes, Steven Wright is a brilliant and underated comedian.

"Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time..." He has the ability to say things so profound yet so hilarious

Give the man his due. He has his own style. incomparable! most important of all, he makes me laugh.

@Surgio1 - ...the "Etch-O Sketch" is a Seventies TOY - that traces a point over a screen with silver dust on its inside. There are two knobs - one makes the point go up and down - the other makes it go from side to side. Thus, it's almost IMPOSSIBLE to draw a CIRCLE with it! You're welcome!

The blessings of whatever supreme being you worship upon you, uploader.Thanks for these videos.

To make a career of doing stand up where most of your material is just one liners....thats special; thats talent.

Doing stand-up routines is not easy. I watched a documentary about a paralyzed veteran who tried to do a stand-up routine.

I like how he puts his hand on his head to stop himself laughing. I do that too

"I used to work at the factory where they made hydrants, but you couldn't park anywhere near the place." So simple but one of my favorite all time jokes... I miss this one liner comedy!

I like the "if I melt dry ice can I swim and not get wet" and "travelling at the speed of light and turn the headlights on" bits. What a comedian!! The man is simply awesome.

This guy is brilliant funny as hell! Thanks for posting!

Wright and Gallagher are the two classic standups I find myself quoting the most.

One of the best Thank you for the laughs ❤️💕❤️❤️❤️

Brilliant , how the hell does he roll em out so consistently?

Saw this man in person at Hampton Beach Casino a few years back.... and I swear my sides are still hurting from the complete hysteria he exuded!!!

One time I called a cemetery to make a reservation, they said I couldn’t do that until I buy a plot. I’ve been thinking about how expensive plans are ever since

K Blly's Supersounds of the 70's

I love it when he starts cracking up at his own jokes

He's the Twilight Zone of Comedy.

About 30 years ago I stumbled on this very show on the comedy channel on a Qantas flight. I laughed continuously and the poor bloke sitting next to me must have wondered what medications I was on. Anyway, fast forward to the present and it turns out that my son-in-law's sister is engaged to a guy who not only looks like Steven Wright but even sounds like him! I want to tell him who he resembles but he's too young to appreciate what that means.

Thank you so much for posting this!!!!

I love this guy he's a fucking riot!!

One of the all time greats.

Damn, Robby Krieger is hilarious!

"Sometimes you can`t hear me because sometimes I'm in parentheses."

“How come you don’t call me anymore?” “I can’t call anyone I want, my phone has no 5 on it.” “That’s weird, how long have you had it ?” “I don’t know my calendar has no sevens” 💀

"I think it's great that Anonymous is famous for being unknown."

Not assuming anyone cares: 9:12 In the old days, if your rotary dialer was broken, you could dial the number five by dialing one very fast five times, or by clicking the hook switch very fast five times, or get the operator to do the call for you and get the operator by clicking the hook switch randomly. One can see this in action in the movie 'Cellular' with a broken landline phone as the victim is doing this with the internal phone wires. Modern phones when they break (in many more ways now, then was possible before) leaves no one to improvise in cases of an emergency.

Only Steven Wright could produce a punchline of "I don't know, my calendar has no sevens."