Very important! I fortunately was taught this lesson early on by my college roommate Andrew. I said the equivalent of "nah man, I suck," and he very firmly said, "don't ever say that, because when you say that, I look dumb. This is me trying to connect with you after enjoying what you did. Learn to take the compliment." And I still forget it! Because saying "nah I suck" almost always comes from a place of insecurity, and whenever I'm feeling insecure, I've caught myself saying the equivalent. The more you place your self-worth on your abilities as a musician, the more insecure you'll feel at all times, and so it's important to move away from that.

Paused at 3:32 to say that I once read something that stuck with me all these years. When a person gives a compliment, it’s not all about the receiver. The giver feels great knowing that the receiver acknowledges the appreciation of the giver. When a person rejects a compliment, it puts the giver in an awkward spot. To a giver, you’re hearing “you don’t know what you’re talking about” and I’ve learned to say “thank you, I really appreciate it” to any compliment ever since.

I swear this has been the most informative, beneficial, and eye-opening real talk you’ve done so far. As somebody who puts them self down as a way to give credit where credit is due, this video helped me realize that i can only sound as good as I think i can sound. Thank you so much Patrick! you’re helping the younger generation of jazz get started on the best possible path!

I'll never forget my buddy saying after he gave me a compliment that I declined "Maybe I just shouldn't of said anything." Stopped me dead in my tracks and I've never declined a compliment since.

Super simple: Smile and say "thank you." There's absolutely no reason you need to affirm or deny other people's opinions of you, just accept them and move on.

Yo pat. This spread round my high school jazz scene like wildfire. We all seen it and we all appreciate this message. Thank you.

“Just cuz you have more to learn doesn’t mean you haven’t learned anything” someone put that on a poster right now

Man a few years ago I dropped the "nah man" for a honest "yo thanks dude!". On the other side of it, when i get a "nah man" I dont contradict them, instead I take it seriously and ask questions like "oh really, what do you think couldve gone better?" and find it has a way more encouraging effect. Most of the time they either know specifically what went wrong, or realize its just bullshit. This change i feel made me a lot more approachable for both good and bad critiques, and also when i give others a compliment they know i mean it. As always outstanding content man, giving good stuff to think about!

When someone compliments you, say thank you!!

“If I tell you I'm good, probably you will say I'm boasting. But if I tell you I'm not good, you'll know I'm lying.” ― Bruce Lee

Thanks for the words Pat. I've been only playing for 3 years and a little more than a half, and I started at 19. I'm now in jazz school, playing with folk who's been playing for 10 years or so. I've always felt like I should be put down since those guys are playing for way longer and have way more capabilities. It feels specially hard coming from an instrument such as the piano, where sometimes it seems everyone around me knows how to play it better. After my first concert ever, I acted like a complete idiot after getting those "ah man you did great" and kept denying it. I'll certainly keep everything you said in mind, as I'm trying more and more to show my playing.

I’m not going to front. I was in tears in the first few minutes of this video. People have been saying I was good for years and I always felt like I had to say no I’m not. But why? Thank you for your thoughts. A lot of people need to hear this. Just because I've stuff to work on it doesn’t make me bad.

One semester I performed A Remark You Made on fretless bass for an applied music recital, and the whole time I thought "I know I cant read all of this, I'm just gonna try my best to get through it confidently even if its wrong". As I was leaving the building, this guy was trying to come up to me and talk to me about my performance and I just wanted to run to my car. My fiancé insisted I stop and listen to him. He was EXTREMELY impressed by my performance, said it sounded like a cool Pink Floyd song or something. I'm pretty sure he wasn't a musician, but I did tell him he should listen to more of Weather Report's stuff. He said "I will!" I'd never seen him since, but for a second I was more interested in him doing that than complimenting me any more. But if I could go back, I wish I stayed put and let him say what he wanted to say, because when you're in college, people don't often get that excited about your performances. And who knows if I'll ever be famous or make music that gets that response from someone ever again?

yep, i'm very guilty of this. A wise lady at church a couple years ago yelled, "just say thanks!" as I trashed my performance. . So since then, i just say thanks.

Whenever someone compliments me, I always just say “thank you, that means a lot!” …because those words of affirmation at the very least mean a lot to the GIVER of the compliment even if my performance fell below my own standards. Graciousness & gratitude are virtues borne of humility too :)

Learned an important lesson at my church gig once - after what I felt to be a particularly sloppy set I got a compliment from one of the singers. After I gave this same “nah nah nah” reaction, this person was actually insulted not only because they felt it diminished their own opinions of taste and sensibility, but also because they went out of their way give the compliment in the first place. I’ve also learned the more difficult lesson that front loading a self-deprecating response to something you’ve done makes it more difficult for a leader/music director to give constructive criticism, because then they see your disappointment in yourself and don’t want to pile on. Thanks Patrick once again for speaking so eloquently about the difficult hard to put into words topics like this! Also congrats on the visa

I've been trying to make a point of this with my friends lately. Whenever someone starts going down that self-deprecating road, I try to shut it down as quick as I can. "None of that. You're good, and I wouldn't be telling you that if I didn't truly believe it. You build me up, I build you up, and we don't take down the bricks the other laid." Nothing rude, but firm that we don't do this here. We're each other's support network.

Great message. Much better to have the self-fulfilling prophecy of "I'm good" than "I suck".

This definitely ties into the whole notion of someone being the “BEST” saxophonist in town. This is incredibly subjective, as it really depends on the personal aesthetics of the listener. If a person really digs Stan Getz, then they may prefer one player over the next. Same if someone loves Kenny G. My goal is to always express myself sincerely within the style of music as I sincerely listen to the other musicians. Some people would like it, some will love it, and some will be hatin. I try to always say thank you whenever I receive a compliment, for some reason I’ve been receiving criticism recently, and I say thank you to that too! No one really knows us the way we knew ourselves so it’s best just to take peoples impressions with a grain of salt

Great talk.. I think as musicians we tend to compare ourselves and our musical progress to our musical heroes … it takes a long time to learn to base our view of progress on ourselves not others .. negativity can definitely become a self fulfilling prophecy

This was REAL talk. I've been way too guilty of this for way too long, pre-college, during, and just after. I also have autism, so the "other people's perspective" thing doesn't usually come easily or make sense to me, so thanks for explaining it! Thanks Patrick! PS, the bits where you said "this'll go into a therapy session" were the most powerful. Would love more of that! Also, the "just because you've got more to learn doesn't mean you haven't learned anything" is gold.

My favorite is “nah I’m tryna be like you” 😂

Thats me, I stated alto in quarantine and I feel like im behind everyone else who has been playing way longer than me. i kept telling myself i was going to jam with others and busk but i felt like I was just shit and wanted to give up.

Thanks Patrick! I'm a 20 yr old Trumpet player from UK, can confirm this is definitely me. I get compliments a lot but I always dismiss them, saying to myself 'I'm not where I want to be at so it doesn't count', and it ends up making me feel down cause I then start to look for things I'm not happy with. But when I compliment someone else's playing, I really mean it cause I see something in their playing, so I guess its a little hypocritical. Maybe some of it is just a learned response from the sort of current jazz culture of trying to always seem humble. I guess it's all about taking the healthy side of humility and aspiring to play like the greats, whilst maintaining some level of self confidence. It's great to hear this sort of stuff from someone like you, who I admire a lot. Please keep these "real talks" coming, I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say we all get a lot from them. Have a great day :))

Patrick, over the last few months you have become one of my musical heroes. I think your playing and your philosophy around music have helped respark my passion for music, and I am so thankful to you for that. In high school, I was one of these "prodigy kids" who stood out from the other kids. But after coming to college (not music school) I realized how poor my music education and ability actually was compared to my new peers, and I've struggled with feeling confident enough to share my music. I feel like I have a very good ear and knowledge of music theory, and I play a few different instruments fairly well, but I struggle to put my MUSIC, my heart and soul, out there for others to see. I always feel like I need to practice more, or that I'm not good enough. This video connected with me in a deep way, and I think that taking your advice will help me with my musical confidence.

I started playing just a year ago; I used to play the violin in elementary and was above average but the passion wasn’t there. I just turned 20 and I’m studying percussion and piano now; but Im always going back and forth with being good and not being good enough bc I compare myself to much, but this video helped; love the community ❤

This is like when someone wants to give you $20 for helping them out with something and immediately going "oh no I can't accept that...". This is not healthy. People feel better when they feel like they can reciprocate. It's better to freely accept compliments and gifts and just do it in a humble way "Wow, thank you so much! I'm so glad I had the chance to help you with that. (Or "Thank you so much, I'm so glad you enjoyed the show! That makes my day, that's what I'm here for.") The more intense the compliment, the more you can just be like "wow, that really means a lot, I don't know what to say other than thank you!" And that often opens the door for more enjoyable conversations with that person. The last thing you want is to make them feel awkward for mustering up the courage to complement you- complimenting someone can be hard to do for the very reason that we don't know how they're going to take it- so when someone complements you, it's good to immediately give as much positivity in return as possible.

I’ve actually been working on my confidence and self Image playing wise and I appreciate stuff like this man. NO ONE talks about this!! This is extremely important, and Im so glad to hear you talk about it. Thank you for making this video

the feeling of getting a compliment from a much older and very accomplished musician after you feel like you played like shit is so hard. i’ve learned that i have to just say thank you but the feeling inside kind of hurts. like i’m accepting a lie

"Thanks for the compliment, but I'll try and work more to sound even better" This is a "real talk" indeed, I'll watch this over and over till it sinks in properly. Thanks Pat You're indeed a mentor 🙌🏿🙌🏿🔥

Exactly! If you make the person giving you the compliment feel like they have no taste, what do you think is going to happen? If someone says they really enjoyed my sax playing, I am sooo grateful! It makes me feel that all the work has not gone in vain. I'm often in situations where I feel "I gotta up my game" and then I go home and work on things. Positive vibrations!!!

Being a beginner accordionist starting a year ago it's important to reframe things so instead of saying I'm bad I say I'm a beginner still learning. As a way to not shut myself down but to acknowledge my state and accomplishment in a year.

In my experience this is much more common in the jazz world than when working in other musical contexts. I did attend a jazz school (bubble) albeit 35 years ago, and the world was a little different. That said, I work in a variety of musical styles and don't really hear the "I suck" and "humility" issues with funk, R&B, and Rock gigs. In the jazz world I agree that it's because we love our heroes so much and try to constantly get better and reach that high bar. Also agree that the attitude is counter-productive on several levels. In this context if one can realize that the joy is in doing the work and learning, and in supporting each other then it's a positive outcome.

This is great! I had an old director in high school who always told us that no matter how we felt we played, if we receive a compliment we should always be appreciative of the fact that the person giving the compliment was still moved enough to say something to us. If we reply with "It wasn't that good" or "Nah man I suck" it isn't respectful of the person giving the compliment, because we're saying they shouldn't feel that way.

Dude, I sucked at sax for so long in college, that when I finally felt the scale tip in the other direction, I was very eager to say, "hell yah, I worked hard to get this good".

Really needed this. Thank you!

Really Deep! Thanks!

Struggling from life long confidence issues as well as perfectionism has really made it difficult for me to accept compliments, up till the point where I realise I come off as ungrateful - lost track of all the chase-up texts to people to say an earnest thank you after the show. That said, when people tell me to ‘keep going’, that always activates my gratitude, because they recognise that I’m a work in progress (which doesn’t feed into the imposter syndrome of usual compliments; it feels like it’s hard to discern between genuine praise and post-gig politeness) but still believe in the good I can do later.

"just because you have more to learn, doesnt mean you havent learned anything" thats great. i actually relate to this more with japanese than with music(should i be worried lol) but yea, ill feel down about "oh i cant hold a full conversation" or "oh my comprehension sucks" or "oh there are so many kanji/words i dont know", but i remember not knowing any kanji at all. i remember typing out my first sentences, and adding "and" or "because" to make a bigger sentence. i remember not knowing where this word ends and that one begins, and lots of other stuff, but i know all that now. we get too focused on what we cant do and it actively prevents us from getting there and its so silly. like, surely we can reach without beating ourselves up the whole time

Thank you so much for this video!

I had a recent encounter like this where a friend who I think is a lot better than me and admire gave me a compliment and I said “thank you that makes me feel a lot better actually” which was 100% true I thought I really clammed some stuff on stage and when they said that it got me out of my own head and realized not everyone sees me the way I see me. I basically was trying to say I accepted the compliment and also acknowledged that I don’t feel that great about my playing and I am trying to form a more positive self-image. I felt that was an honest way to respond, do you (including all y’all in the comments) think that was an appropriate thing to say? Also, I think it’s a lot worse in the internet age because we see all these virtuosos all the time on social media. It’s been helping me to remember that social media is a concentration of the greatest players around the world, and it’s normal to not be able to play at that level with the amount of experience I have. I’ve been playing guitar with no live or band experience for 6 years but I’ve only been actually studying jazz with a jazz teacher for 1 and have just barely started to play with bands, meaning I can play well with jam band stuff but feel I am way less versed in jazz, like I am having a lot of trouble outlining the changes of a jazz blues right now in a bebop style. I know so much more theory and analysis than I can actually perform confidently right now, and that’s why I feel so frustrated and have had a bad self image

Thanks for your channel Patrick. Your videos always motivate me to push myself musically. You have an ability to communicate the power and importance of music like only a few people that I have seen. I really enjoy your content.

keep doing these please!! 100% accurate, been through that myself.

hey pat, this video is great, along with all the other real talks. looking forward to the next ones and thanks for spreading the insight, not many players go into depth about this side of music i feel

Great insights and advice Patrick!

Great video. Thanks a lot for this discussion!

Great video Patrick!

This is a fantastic lesson man and it’s so true. As musicians we put in so much time that when we get complimented we need to appreciate it. We moved that person with our abilities and it’s a wonderful thing.

Thank you for that.

Dang haven't watched it yet but had to comment real quick: i really struggle with putting myself down when it comes to music. Like a lot.

I used to do something similar (answering acompliment poorly), and at 50 it's a hard habit to break. Breaking it is something I've been really proud of myself for (only managed it recently). When I decided to go pro, the head of the music union here asked me "are you good?" I'm not sure I answered it very well. I said "some other professional sax players say I am, but..." This was before I had gained more confidence and broke the habit.

y on the line ThanksI've been doing this for a couple decades longer than you but you a such a wonderful gift to the musical community in your playing and sharing your insight into all aspects of being a player that I am extremely grateful every time I hear you with or without your horn. Things we "kinda" know or should know, you just lay on the line.Thank You.

Patrick, you are a leader in the community, and I truly appreciate your words here. Coming from an american christian background where a premium was placed on humility, I've struggled with this for years (and still do). I appreciate you kindly calling us those of us out who need to hear it. And your call to action for a more supportive community of cats and one that acknowledges individual progress in favor of the comparison to the best cat in town is one that I fully subscribe to (yes, even though you didn't ask for it).

"Comparison is the thief of joy." I've always tried to play something that I'd want to listen to...if I listen to myself and think "I don't like that" then I go and make it better and the end result is something that I like. If you enjoy what you're doing that's really the best thing - people should enjoy making music, it's such a beautiful gift. Thanks Pat!

Loved the video! Thank you for these type of talks, they are really appreciated.

Ah man, I love this type of content, and honestly this has been my exp so far in college, people not taking my compliments, or not realize that i say them honestly, not to just make them feel better, trying to make them understand, how you are GOOD, by playing your CURRENT 100% . I see you trying to play your best, pushing your limits, I'll compliment you. They all have this idea that in the future they'll be good, so they can't or wont try to play their 100% NOW cus it doesn't look like their idea of what they'll be later...And these positive thoughts have all been from you Pat, making me realize these things, so thanks and keep them comin' :D

Thanks for your insight!

Thanks, agreed,😊

I’m 24 and been playing 6 strings since I was 8/9. There was a period between ages 15-22 where I didn’t have a guitar and was homeless so it really stunted my growth and learning. All that time I never mentioned my ability to play guitar at all and If I did I would say “I play a little bit of guitar.” I’m not a fast player by any means, but at this point I still get plenty of “wows” from the music/rhythms I create when jamming. I always thought I would be rhythm/chords only player, but I’ve got a lot of people telling me now “you’d be a great lead too”. I’ve surpassed the point of “where I want to be” and had no clue because of years of not having an instrument, not jamming with anyone, and doubting/belittling my ability. I remember one time I was playing with the first person I ever jammed with, we were recording some demos and he told me to do a solo. I did the solo and we listened back to it, and in the middle of it he goes “wow man you sound good” meanwhile I’m thinking we were listening to HIS solo and saying in my head “that’s definitely not me” I don’t remember how I responded, but I’m really hoping I didn’t shut the compliment down. I think I said something along the lines of “is that really me? you really think so?” It meant a lot to me because I looked up to him more than any other musician in this world, probably still do. At the time we were 14/15 and he already knew how to play 5 different instruments and it was my first very recorded solo. I’d like to add that phantom practice is real thing. During the 7 years I didn’t have a guitar to play, I would practice in my head and come up with licks and melodies, and solo to songs in my head, when I finally got a guitar again at 22, my ability had skyrocketed without practicing in 7 years. I could do licks I never thought I’d do, solo without hitting the wrong notes, effortlessly fret complicated chords, and I was 2x faster at playing my scales cleanly.

This is such a great video. Really hope I can take a lesson with you someday - such genuine vibes and good wisdom here.

Man, l love your channel. Keep up the great work

PREACH! So happy to see someone talking about this

I really needed to hear this. Thank you so much.

Someone told me a long time ago just to say thank you. After all, I know I’m good, I know people enjoy listening. What I think isn’t as important as just accepting the compliment. That’s not arrogant, it’s just not false modesty.

Wise words dude. 🙏🏻

I had to learn how to take compliments and just say “thanks”. When you pull the “oh no I’m not that good” thing, it offends people because you’re low key telling them they don’t know what they’re talking about or they’re lying to blow smoke up you’re @$$. I’ve even had people say “Hey bro, you do know you’re really good”…and now I just say…”I know”…as matter of factly as possible because to me, being good isn’t the point…the point is, how did I serve the music.

Thank you for the reminder. I really appreciate this. I have a lot of trouble receiving praise gracefully.

Preciate you Pat

As an aspiring saxophone student whos going through a lot of the environments you describe, it means a lot to hear the perspective from you. love the real talk format

Great video! We need to discuss this more and more so kudos to you. I, too, suffered from the fake humble as a child prodigy and it did nothing but tarnish my self esteem, sadly. Thanks for encouraging us all! And South Florida represent! Haha

I'm one of those who used to argue that I suck when folks would give me a compliment. Then, one day my mentor told me to stop it. Just say thank you. That's what I do now so as to not insult the one giving me that compliment. Yes, I still want to tell them I'm bad but I know that the real issue is wanting to play better. We all want that. It's self defeating to be always self deprecating. Good subject. Thanks Patrick !!

This is such an incredibly hard habit to break once you start doing it. Even though I've gotten to the point that I don't say it out loud whenever someone gives me a compliment, I still think it. It's a fine line between understanding and positively accepting your limitations, failures, and mistakes and then actually working to fix it, versus negatively accepting your limitations, etc, and allowing those to keep you held down. I'm mostly still in the latter of those two and haven't learned how to stop.

I've been guilty of so much of this to the point where it definitely has had negative effects, but I'm finally reaching a healthier attitude with the whole thing. Mindset is such a big deal, and it isn't built in a day either.

This was timely as it pertains to a variety of things in my world now. Thanks.

I always love this"Real talk."

Amen!!!

love your music and your channel. you inspire me. cheers from France!

Thank you.

Hi Pat, thanks for. this great lesson! We all need to make a difference between being humble and putting ourselves down which is counterproductive and hurts the person making the compliment. It is important to turn this into something positive.

And I'm fed up with my insecurities since I know I've got more to give. Last time at the jamsession, I decided to straighten up and focus only on Giving and Listening. Insecurity leads to me holding back and living in my head on stage. I want to let it all out and I've seen time and time again that people enjoy what I have to give. And how humble a thing is that, to want to share everything I have as best I can? How grateful I am to be in the position to do that. And now noticing realtime how I'm Not recognising that I've worked really hard to get to that place, because I need to be there.

Thank you so much. I am so guilty of this. You are a lifelong inspiration!

Wise quality words, delivered to make you really think. I'm looking to forward to catching a gig when I'm Tokyo. One of my former students introduced me to your playing, (and caught a gig a few weeks back). Keep it coming.

This is real. Thank you.

Thank you Patrick for doing this. Crippeling selfdoubt is such a major issue trying to perform a craft that everyone will have an opinion on. We are all vulnarble to critique but most of all ourself ❤

This is really awesome! I’m a freshman saxophonist, I’m pursuing jazz and classical and I’ve definitely been pushing myself down for a long time with my words, this video is great. Thanks so much man. Awesome to see a wonderful fluent jazz musician reach to other people. Thanks

Sometimes we wonder if someone is actually being genuine or just trying to flatter. I have experienced both

great video Patrick, I agree with what you are saying as a younger jazz musician, love your work and your music... and yes that was a compliment

Dude i went through so much of this!

May God bless this cat for all the game he’s giving. Thanks man!

Thank you for this video.

I like the long video length. Thank you for sharing Patrick, you provide an informative perspective.

You hit some very important points. I am very guilty of calling myself bad, because I often feel that people are just trying to encourage me, even though I feel it's obvious that I messed up, or fell below my own expected standard, in a performance. I definitely need to stop doing that. Thanks for the shake up.

Great insight. I am barely getting to the point where I actually call myself a musician. We are all in the process of becoming. This video helps me to appreciate where I have come from, where I am now, and where I am going. Thanks bro!

Crucial video! "Thank you" really is the best way to reply whether someone is telling you rock, or you suck. Putting yourself down just lays all your insecurities out there for everyone else to see. Being thankful and grateful might not always get one further in life, but it always gives one the chance to leave a positive impression. I always remind myself when playing (especially when playing ticketed/cover charge) events: these people paid money because one way or another, they got the idea that they wanted to spend their night hearing the music I'm a part of. If you turn around and tell them after they bought the tickets, drinks, t shirt, etc that you think you suck, you pretty much just dissed their whole night, and you're essentially telling them they have bad judgement for coming to see you/your colleagues/bandleader! The negativity becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy in that moment.

What a great video Patrick, completely agree with your opinion and somehow makes me think what I am doing and thinking everytime that someone give me a complement. Thank you so much!! grettings from Germany.

Your comment about being the kid that was slightly better through school and having to keep yourself down hits hard. I was always the kid that practiced a lot so I kept pushing further and further ahead of my peers, but I felt like I couldn't come out and say I was good without being like "look at me I work hard and can play all this stuff." I still sometimes feel like I need to keep my head down but I'm trying to unlearn it because I'm not a top level player at all, but I'm soooo much better than I pretend to be in conversations with musicians but I always feel like admitting it is a bad thing even though it's not.

Excellent points Patrick, thanks for the great video. And don't worry about long videos! People can pause it and return anytime they want, let them complain about nothing. Most will appreciate that you took your time to say what you mean fully.

Hey Pat, Hope you are doing well and I love your videos. This was something that I have been thinking about lately as it has been a thing for me since high school. I also play saxophone and have always pushed myself to get better, and still do to this day. In high school, I was really involved in the music program from marching band, jazz band, and concert band. I also got to be in many honor bands that I have appreciated being in. When it came to people complimenting me, I would always appreciate it, but deep down I did not want to accept it because I feared the ego. The ego is something I wanted to avoid as it has been the downfall for many people, especially in musicians. However, it started to eat up inside of me and it somewhat carried into college. But that was also when I started to learn how to be confident, but in a way that does not make you look like a jerk. One thing that also started to happen was my approach to getting better. I have always said get better, but I never said specifically. I know that right now I am constantly working on classical articulation and for jazz it is thinking of different ways to improvise over changes using different scales and modes. There are more, but at the end of the day I can confidently say that I am happy where I am at right now and cannot wait to move forward. What also helps is having a great group of colleagues that have helped me through thick and thin and I have also helped them if I see them struggling.

Thank you for making this video, seriously. Seeing someone I admire saying such relatable things is very helpful. (no need to read it all but I didn't know how to make it more concise) I wanted to share my experience on this, since my my reason to actually "reject" compliments (sometimes) and even despise them is kinda weird and caused me some emotional problems at times. I've been told so many times since I was 5 years old that I was "so amazing" "so good, what a prodigy" and more shit because of my perfect pitch and being able to play practically anything hearing it once, being much more advanced in terms of playing and musicality than my classmates. I was literally so used to compliments and I knew that I had it much easier than the other musicians around me to basically do anything, I was limitless in some way and I knew it, I was so much better than anyone of my class and even above at instruments that weren't my main (drums). And man, of course I liked the compliments, it felt good watching people talk about my skills and how good I was, mostly when you are a young soul, but that also backfired SO HARD as the time went through. I was so used to not having to study because my comfort zone was so big thanks to my ear, that I never studied theory, because I "didn't need it". And instead of studying theory and studying what my drums teacher told me to practice (the more technical stuff), I just did what I wanted and never listened to them. It was not a problem of ego whatsoever, but it was a problem of being too accomodated to my ability, and not getting out of the comfort zone. Well, that made me have to repeat 2 years of music school, because i was basically an inept reading sheet music so i failed everytime, and although I also did crazy chords and very cool improvised solos from a young age on the keys, the "incredible prodigy who plays drums and the piano so well" was literally failing all exams and looking like a toddler in class because I knew shit about music theory. And i know there's people who say that "music theory isn't everything" and all of that. I believe that is true, and I'm proud of what I've learned by just experimenting alone with all the instruments throughout my life. But i've lost so much time and I could have improved so much, my parents had to spend so much money they weren't supposed to spend, just because I didn't want to study theory. Now I am recovering from it. Slowly, but recovering from it with a much better mindset. Thanks to this I gained a very good self-conciousness about myself (musically speaking) and I know i have a MASSIVE potential. At least that's how I feel. Sometimes i feel too arrogant thinking about it, but fuck it, I know myself better than anyone, and as you said I shouldn't be afraid of having self-confidence. When you said "I know the feeling of wanting to hold back so the others don't feel bad" it hit me like a truck. I sometimes even stopped playing certain instruments or not showing that to people, or even not uploading things to youtube because I knew I would make certain people bad, and with close people, that affected me so much. So hearing compliments is rough for me because I still have it al lil bit associated to that time of my life. It's not that I despise them, but I feel like i don't deserve them, because even though I spent hours and hours messing around with all instruments, I didn't work nearly as hard as other musicians that do similar stuff than I did. I just messed around and didn't listen to anyone, only to myself, and it reminds me of a failure, one of the few things I really regret (not) doing in my life. Gonna think about everything you said in this video, you're so goated for making this.

Excellent advice, i'm gonna remember this.