"Possibly in a moment of clarity he may have committed suicide" That is a haunting sentence; the idea that someone is so far gone that it is *clarity* that led him to take his own life. There's little in the world sadder than that.

"Terry was a fantastic programmer" this is a huge understatement, Terry developing his own kernel, compiler, assembler, graphics library, cli utilities (like grep), his own programming language, is insane. that is pretty much like having Richard Stallman getting rid of the entire GNU team and writing all of the GNU core utils himself + more. Terry will be missed

Hey Fredrik, there's a rabbit hole I discovered recently that seems like it might go pretty deep. Not about an individual, but about the company that sells 'Kirby Vacuum Cleaners' (Kirby brand is COMPLETELY unrelated to the Nintendo character, FYI) My mother used to be a Kirby saleswoman once, and she didn't tell me much over than that in the mornings the employees were required to sing hymns and praises to the vacuum cleaners... All my life I thought she was joking, but I looked into it recently found all kinds of video evidence of weird shit going on at employee meetings. The stories of singing are definitely real, most of them being pop songs or classic church hymns with the lyrics swapped out to be about Kirby vacuum cleaners.... it's so strange and cult-like, and a bit overwhelming. I'm not sure where to continue from there, but perhaps you could look into it?

Regarding Terry's racism, making inflammatory remarks (be they racist, sexist, etc) is somewhat common among schizophrenics. We're not entirely sure why, but there are theories. A big one is that these remarks are socially conditioned to have power when said--think of how people recoil when people say the n-word. The schizophrenic brain, which tends to give the individual paranoid delusions of some kind, stick in their brains and turn those words/phrases into a loop that repeats until they start saying it out loud. That's why it sometimes starts seeming like a tick to talk about it, and why he (and other people like him) tend to use the same odd phrases together (CIA n*****; both things would cause a delusional paranoid person to internally recoil). They don't think of these words the same way we do. In general, the schizophrenic brain tends to latch onto things it considers "bad." The CIA has cameras in your house, racist words, God will smite humanity unless you do X... in the 80s (?) it was common for schizophrenia to 'insist' that the person was gay, because being gay was considered a terrible thing to be. As being gay becomes more socially accepted, this tendency has seen a marked decrease across the board. But the "badness" of racial epithets remains or has actually become MORE heinous over recent years. I also think he loneliness was a factor in why he behaved so. Schizophrenia LOVES when it can get reactions out of other people. Saying racist things == angry reaction from reasonable people, which feeds into their delusions. And if people ignore it or even agree with it, then the brain doesn't see why it shouldn't. It's a terrible catch-22. I don't think Terry was 'actually' racist in the way we usually think. I think his diseased brain made him say things he didn't mean a lot, like when he yelled at his parents. People who only see his rants and dismiss him don't see the full story and don't understand how all-consumingly terrible schizophrenia can be. Mental diseases are probably the scariest things in the world.

The drum kit was because people wanted to do something nice for him, he had genuine fans. He had a mini drum kit that someone bought for him and he loved playing it

I had the great pleasure of interviewing Terry a number of years ago for my student radio show. He was great, just wonderful to talk to. I felt he was - for all his foibles - in some ways a true genius, operating on a level many of us will never understand. Still can't believe he's gone, what a terrible loss.

Fred please make sure you take care of Yourself! We can’t lose you

When Terry did his 'hit and run' he turned himself in (at his mothers objection) and the cops just released him since there was no evidence of any hit and run happening in that area. So unless he hit a homeless person he probably just ran over a traffic cone/traffic barricade at night. This coupled with his mental health made him think he ran someone over, and as the years went on he filled in the gaps of what he thought happened rather than what really happened. Anyway, after the death of Terry and his mom his house went up for sale. It was surreal looking at pictures taken by realtors of his home empty.

I wish there were more videos of Terry demonstrating his visual programs, like the 40 Years in the Desert sim or the elephant drawing.

I really appreciate how thoughtful, comprehensive, and empathetic you are with all of your subjects. You're so careful to look at things from every angle, and acknowledge what you do know, what you don't know, and what you can't know. When people ask these questions full of assumptions and short-sightedness and you answer them so humbly and intelligently it really makes me happy. You're an exceptional person, and I wish more people could be like you. Go ahead and put that in the nice compliments folder. You earned it.

It's such a sad story, Terry had an undeniable talent, building his entire OS from the ground up. I genuinely feel sad about him...

Me: Man...what is the point of staying up at 2:30 am... *refreshes YT* *new DTRH content* Me: Oh...THIS...

The question at 5:30 about people like him hit home. I'm a schizophrenic, just like he was. The words of understanding means a lot. Wish more people was a sympathetic. I know I've done my fair share of stupid things stemming from being unmedicated.

I'd rather you avoid the big personalities and their associated drama. Plenty of KZfaqrs cover that stuff already. You do such a great job at digging up hidden gems that on the surface may sound boring, but are expertly made interesting thanks to your hard work. You're one of the greats of "the weird side of KZfaq", never change. ;)

Dude, as a content creator, I had never really heard that "January is a notoriously bad month for KZfaq" and that's a huge relief to know." Thank you so very much!

Sorry I didn’t notice this earlier. Speaking from long experience with a severely schizophrenic roommate, not to jump to conclusions, but the abuse allegations sure seemed like an episode. I pity my former roommate’s father trying to talk her down from him having abused her; the patience he displayed. I don’t know for sure about that, but I do know for sure that the accusations she leveled at my during a fit were false, and that the she made utterly absurd allegations in that state. The most ridiculous? Let me preface by saying she was 50ish. She spent something like 30-40 hours utterly distraught and at times screaming at the top of her lungs (often on the phone with her beleaguered dad) that the neighbor kids had sexually abused their dog, which is why it had forced itself upon her in her youth. For this reason, it was desperately important for her dad to go kill the neighbor’s dog (which would’ve been well over 30) because she was positive that it was actively running wild and raping kids to the point of it being an epidemic in her small hometown. She couldn’t for the life of her understand why no one was doing anything about this spree. Again, my layman’s guess? Having seen it from people with similar issues I suppose that the abuse allegations were episodes of people being very detached from reality. ASIDE: My mother is a schizophrenic. Not quite that bad, but without credentials, please let me allow that I have spent a large majority of my life learning to identify the mannerisms of a fit; when to argue and when to placate until your loved one at least mostly rejoins the rest of us.

The TempleOS video was a movie practically! Can't wait for the next DTRH, but don't forget to take care of yourself too Fredrik!

Your Q&As are always interesting, I really enjoy hearing your personal thoughts.

Fredrik, thank you so much for pulling all those moments from Terry's interesting but incredibly tragic story. I learned about him in 2014/2015 from 4chan's /g/ board and he quickly became one of my favourite internet denizens. As an IT professional, I learned a lot from Terry and I only just recently heard of his passing after not following him when he started to disappear. You did an amazing job and the TempleOS episode is one of my favourites - definitely your best work in my opinion.

Brother I just want you to know that your demeanor and presentation on KZfaq is nothing short of utmost professionalism. The sheer effort you devote to your background research and dialogue is admirable to say the least. You're clearly a very intelligent man and I can only aspire to reach that level of sheer knowledge and vocality of any subject. Respect, my man, and please keep up the phenomenal content because I could devote entire weekends to it like any professional documentary.

Not gonna lie, it felt really weird to hear you say "fucking" out of any quote like that. I like it though. Casual Fred is also nice.

Won’t lie. I tend to miss out on the visual components of your videos. Doing homework usually. At least the first time through.

Thanks for doing all this, Fredrik. I had heard about TempleOS and Terry but I had no idea what awaited me when I clicked your video. It's very professionally done and I now have an admiration for Terry and TempleOS.

Fred, you are a god damn hero. I am so happy you are so dedicated to your craft and you are able to do it as your job. Love you ❤

"Bastardly queer" was the highlight of that episode. I use it in daily conversion frequently.

i love these Q&A's and i look forward to your next video. it's cool watching someone who is also from Oregon!

Missed you Fred, can't wait for the next DTRH

Great video Fred! Looking forward to the next video when it comes out :)

You should do a "Down The Rabbit Hole" on the late GG Allen the most twisted, depraved, extreme, and violent punk rocker ever to exist.

Thank you for the update. I'm familiar with the agencies caring for the homeless drifting through Portland, Oregon. You've done a beautiful job sharing your subject's brilliance and his madness. I think your presentation is important and wish everyone associated with helping those with schizophrenia could see it.

I really appreciate you doing this Q & A. I am going to try to remember to join your discord as I have become a fan. This was a really sensitive thing for me, being aware of Temple/Sparrow OS much earlier on and then losing touch with it until one day I saw the livestream and tuned in. I was really tempted to call him to actually talk about his design decisions. I really regret not calling. An OS like his is one that could only really be done in intellectual isolation.

Oh good, I'm glad to see more stuff on this second channel.

Thanks for answering my question! I visited the Pacific Northwest, Portland specifically. Very beautiful, we got engaged there

Just a small knit-pick, Fredrik: his name is actually Gene Ray, Cubic. Please be precise. Thanks. (edit: sarcasm)

5 months later, see a new Fred video, aaaaand it's a Q/A -_- ...jk m8, a fresh one would be dope but I could listen to you read out shampoo ingredients and you'd make it an engaging story; keep it up !!!

I wonder if a down the rabbit hole on Jack Chick & his.... "interesting" Chick Tracts comics could be a possible future episode.

I wasn't the phone guy but I do rip the audio from the KZfaq DASH streams and put it on my phone and car flash drive so I can listen to your work even after I've watched it. It makes it VERY interesting to listen several times and then watch again! You appreciate the video part a lot more after hearing the audio several times without any visuals.

Rest in peace Terry, the real life Mad God

Just gotta say I love your attitude and work. Take care of yourself, though!

Keep up the great work!

i'd post recommendations, but i feel like the stuff you find is more interesting to learn about then all the stuff i know.

I know this is late but I do listen to all your videos at work and since I can use headphone and I’m working alone most the night so it’s something I think a lot of people do to just pass the time at work

the real question : did you install TempleOS ?

The lack of social services help Terry received late in his life when he was homeless was very upsetting to me. The city / county where he was at and being charged with crimes seemed they rather punish then get him the help he needed. Look where his story ended when people that need help and then dont get it....

Gotta admit I do the same thing with your video's. I put them on and listen to them while doing somthing or when I go to bed. I dont think I've watched more then 25% of your videos but I've listened to 100% of all of them at least 2 times

Oh and PS: Self-Care, YES, you should. Might not seem like topics like this are affecting you, but believe me brother they are. Take care and thanks for your work.

It messes me up watching your episode, like I saw this guy living behind a power box for a while ( I live in Vegas )

It's sad to see but sometimes people who are mentally impaired have moments that they are totally normal, and realise the "voices" they hear or things they see aren't real. You can see a few moments in his videos it comes and goes. The 1 thing that baffles me is how clear and orderly (whilst still rants) his online messages were.

Really enjoyed that, Fredrik, would love to see more Q&A's on other videos, including your older ones. Speaking of that, your Patreon mentions that the 2$ allows people to ask a question, does that mean there will be Q&A's after every video from now on? And will there be any about your older videos? I'd have a lot to ask regarding both Rajneeshpuram and the Final Fantasy House, for example. By the way, maybe I'm biased since I discovered your channel through that video (or rather, I decided to give it a shot starting there), but I think TempleOS is your best video to date. It's everything I'd expect from a show like Down The Rabbit Hole: informative, thorough, surprisingly neutral by showing both the good and the bad of the man in question (and the good and bad of the people around him), developing various themes and most importantly, showing a lot of direct content, which is something I feel more "traditional" documentaries couldn't do as easily.

I don't know if you have seen this video in your research, but in it, Terry mentions "the guy he hit in 1999" (possibly in Vegas around September) , and that he was off his meds at the time (the guy he hit, could possibly be the hit and run). Quite a funny, and interesting video where he talks about old work he did, and a book he planned to write. It's called "TempleOS: Terry Davis "BBQ Hopkins" 5/20/2017"

holy shit I never saw this most premium content!

Liked how you took the topic seriously.

i actually tweeted diana cowern about the templeOS DTRH video, she replied saying she hasn't watched it. i dont think she has the intention to either.

8:05 this kind of enthusiasm makes me wish I knew Fredrick Knudsen as a friend.

I'm using TempleOS as kind of a VST by making sounds on it and recording them for my DAW

Doing great work mate

I definitely listen to your videos to go to sleep

I just checked to see if you had a video on the main channel like, an hour ago. then after the current fiasco spreading online; I come back to youtube and see this. interesting night.

You should do a video over the history of D&D

I can't wait for the Hurdy Gurdy Q and A video!!

It's sad, if he was treated properly and NOT thrown back on the streets each time, he could of been cared for and created something truly amazing. Great minds often come with greatest sadness.

Oh ONLY half an hour? jeez fred I could listen to you talk about pretty much anything for days lol

I feel so called out right now as someone who does the upside-down phone thing pretty frequently, especially when I'm trying to fall asleep. I even had it upside down when you said it, too! I just came here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now. 😢

9:50 thats how i watch alot of videos, ill turn it on and listen while im playing a game.

I would honestly really like to hear about the programming of the OS itself, if you still want to

Yeah...this was a tough rabbit hole. I have a slight prejudice when it comes to schizophrenic people because I've had bad experiences with them and I guess being bi polar myself I tend to need to know I can trust other people and know their not screwing me over and I just don't have that so much with schizophrenics. I really don't mean any disrespect to anyone reading, I know not everyone who is schizophrenic is untrustworthy or anything like that...I just haven't had the best interactions with those types of people in my past. But all in all: this was a tough rabbit hole because regardless my prejudice it left me personally with a swirl of emotions. Everything from "leave dead things alone " to "maybe he deserves what he got cuz he wasted his life like that". Now tho,I just feel like he doesn't deserve what happened and if he had actually gotten better help maybe life would have turned out better. Mental health issues suck and how we've dealt with treatment in the not long ago past is awful; but it's gotten better and I guess that's some kind of good we can take away from all the rabbit holes that tackle the topic.

At 19:00, you are asked about how he as able to complete his education. I found some information on Wikipedia. Terry Davis received his Bachelor's degree in computer engineering in 1992, and his Master's Degree in electrical engineering in 1994, both from Arizona State University. The same Wikipedia entry also says that Davis began experiencing regular manic episodes and developed delusions in March of 1996.

The difference between this and timecube for me was was I was never entertained by Gene Ray, he was just a pompous asshole, Terry had his wholesome moments and I was always intrigued by his work, takes alot of talent to write your own os, kernal and compiler.

i think what ultimately killed him was a lack of support. if he had a network to help him, close contact with friends and institutions, he could have probably lead a quality life of self fulfilment. the absolute worst case scenario was for him to be left alone, homeless. his tale is not only a story of the mental health crisis, but of the homeless one as well. it truly is tragic, such a bright and creative mind lost forever. a human being that never received the same chance as everyone else and the world is lesser because of it. in sweden (where i live), convicts can sometimes be offered apartments and support groups, completely free of charge on the condition that they do not abuse it. i do not mean to compare the mentally ill to criminals. but the apartments aren't issued because someone is a criminal, they are issued because someone needs support, and that they could have in common. so maybe the homeless could get the same treatment? it's better than letting them roam the streets, more importantly it's the right thing to do. just a roof over one's head isn't enough, but it's a start. the convict policy is meant to introduce some stability and routines but also a good enviroment (and the necessary support) for self actualisation. so you can seize control of your life and turn it around. similarily to how someone who has lived in an institution seperated from the rest of society might need help to kickstart their progress, so might the homeless. in practice however our system is lackluster and meager, convicts are dropped in an apartment and then that's it. i think a common thought for these people is "now what?" (i know that's a quote from one such convict anyway by the name of Kenneth Viken), they get a checkup like once a month or so but then that's about it. support meetings are optional and not very frequent either (also like a monthly occurance i believe). i don't think they're given a job but i think at the very least the government might give a letter of recommendation to local stores. i've known a schizophrenic and although i'm sure not everyone experiences it the same way. my schizophrenic friend never had to be admitted to an institute follwing an episode or such (unlike terry alledges about himself), neither was she unable to work, and it still had a tremendous impact on her life. hesitating to cross roads, needing time to digest sounds and other stimulation, holding hands for comfort at times. so i can't imagine how it was for someone like terry for which it seemed more chronic. though on the brightside he didn't appear to be living in much fear, something my friend struggled with.

Actually down the rabbit hole Terry's sister which is technically his family knew about how popular he was on the internet as she is the one that made a posting on Facebook stating that Terry had died and she thank everybody for their support of Terry and all his fans. the reason why she made this posting it's because so many people were bombarding Terry sister with emails asking her if Terry really died. You do really good research, I'm just really surprised that you did not research enough down the rabbit hole to find out that Terry's family knew how popular it was and that Terry's sister actually made a Facebook posting.

So when is the video about Temples OS's "ins & outs" coming out??

9:50 I'm sorry. I'm one of those people 😂😂😂 I'm a librarian, and I like to listen to videos like yours as if they were audio books, so I don't really _watch_ your videos. I'll turn my phone on to actually watch it if you're talking about something with clear visuals, like when Terry did his live streams, but i more or less listen to your videos instead of watch them.

Hey Fredrik, I have a topic about a person who fascinated me a great deal with some online and RW eccentric activities. I am, however, worried that by making an article, video, or even mentioning it to other people, I am bringing attention to a person who - eccentricities aside - is someone who is (in my opinion) clearly under some quite severe delusions and is mentally ill. I was wondering if you have some guidelines or principles to use, or if you'd be interested in looking at it privately? I don't want to be a part of disturbing someone's life more than it already is, and I certainly don't want to "make a name" doing it.

"It's not Ore-gone, it's Oregon" oh boy I know you're from Oregon with that response.

I'm surprised I hadn't really considered how much of a toll these videos would take on you to make, considering some of them (especially Temple OS) are pretty rough to watch. Kudos and thanks for making the effort to make such great content and remember to stay healthy, mental health is important. ^.^

How am I JUST NOW finding your second channel?

You should do a video on T.H.E fox the worlds oldest surviving web comic

STOP being so reasonable and respectful! This is the internet! (joking aside, I love your work and admire your commitment to the research you do for your documentaries, I hope one day you can make them into a blu-ray series or something :), keep up the great work!)

The drums will drive you crazy if your passion isn’t drumming

26:00 I have watched Hour and Hours of not only Terry's streams live but your videos also and this is the first time I've ever heard you swear...

very informative

What Terry meant by "weird little man walking back and fourth" was to do with quantum physics & the, is the universe a simulation theory. www.space.com/32543-universe-a-simulation-asimov-debate.html

you should make a video on the works of Osamu Sato.

Is there a video of your programmer friend talking about the codebase? As an engineer, I have a serious itch there to hear from her.

Song during justin roiland's question? Around 22:40

Better late than never :)

As a musician, hearing that Terry was a drummer makes it all the more sad.

I don't have two dollars but I do have a question. Do FBI agents really glow in the dark?

His parents just finally got too old to deal with any violent tendencies he was apparently beginning to have. Not to mention they surely needed some peace in their last years.

wait, there is more than one interview?

Wait, you live in the US? Your name is the most Danish/Norwegian name I've ever seen. Also, could you recommend any channels like yours? I know of Nexpo, Atrocity Guide etc, but they're not thorough like you are. I've watched your stuff a lot and I want more rabbit holes that go into depth

Get a big enough profile and it's a work inevitability. 7:40. Stuff going on in the background of the bird shot is NUTS. Hacker networks I can't get my ass onto without jumping through some hoops. Seems like a networking thing, need an invite.

rip terry

Terry was E.Engenier too

Down the Rabbit Hole Chip Chan?

wait how often do you upload

I love the elephants

You mentioned that Terry wasnt able to take care of himself. Any idea why in the interview with young guys he had a nice coat was relatively clean?

You live in the Pacific Northwest? For some reason I thought you lived in Norway...

I don't think Terry was racist, people with Schizophrenia have a different relationship with reality and subsequently language and words themselves. In his case, he was also manic and would blurt out words (didn't he usually apologize after saying it?). The Church Of The Subgenius lampoons this behavior, especially in the Robot Computer God segment, which is total word salad interspersed with racial slurs, something a schizophrenic say thinking its revelatory genius.