THERE IS BEAUTY IN HOW JULES UNDERSTANDS MARRIAGE WITH SUCH DEEP WISDOM. GOD is surely listening to her!!!!

Bien, literally speaking pure facts. Your happiness should never be tied to your partner.

I think it is important for couples to discuss bills, parenting styles, credit, debt, religion, how to deal with family, what beliefs will be instilled in the children, childhood traumas, sexual expectations, family health history, mental health history, bucket list, dream home, careers and education, political views and whatever else comes to mind before marriage. Love alone is not enough.

May ALL the episodes with the guys be an hour long, we don't mind!! What a lovely episode, good job!!

I think Julia nailed it at the end. The objective is to bring men and women together in a cohesive manner. However, speaking to Ivy and Shivs discussion on invisible roles and competition, it's incumbent on both sexes to appreciate what they each bring to the table. No role is more important than the other, as the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

Bien's level of openness is on another level. He is so truthful and I just love that. Over 25 is the place to go to when you want to be part of authentic conversations.

Dear Bien, My heart is full because of your fresh and honest way of viewing relationships. Thank you for blessing my evening.

It's the way shiv looks at shikkie when explaining about the finances! Love love love

Glad to have watched this session and bringing in dudes to share also from their perspective. I would suggest a session on The men speak: Pregnancy journey. I'd like to be part of that discussion though I'm based outside +254. I host 'diaper' parties for men based on my experience living away from home with no family and getting through that journey wasn't easy. I carry out diaper parties to allow any upcoming father to come and share his expectations and we (other young fathers) listen and share views from our experience. Continue the great work.

To be in the kind of marriage that Bien is speaking about, you have to have a Very strong relationship. WUEH! It's admirable but the practicability is hard!

Wow, I am 22 and as a guy whose father passed on when I was younger. This is teaching me a lot. You guys keep it real as you have been. I'm learning lots of things right now. I wish you guys knew how much this means. 🎇

Theres a new breed of men who seek to preach how sexy it is for a woman to 100% hustle and 100% take care of the home. This is how one gets wrinkles.Miss me with the BS.

Thank you Ivy! I was a stay-at-home mum for years! I went back to school when my last born went to university! I make no apologies for not working for money. I expected and got all my needs met. I still don't work, I still get my needs met. Everybody's different and that's okay too.

Over 25 should always have the guys. Not that we don't like you ladies. We absolutely adore you!!!! The guys bring a different perspective of things and it's very enlightening to see things from the male point of view. And this panel is definitely it!! Bright, Shiv, & Bien are perfect. If you add one more maybe Ng'arua he's kinda nasty 🤣 in a good way.

Loving how Shiv shares his mind and doesn't back down from speaking the truth even when opposed. Both gender roles exist for a reason and work as a team. Don't compete because at the end of the day, you're on the same side!

Marriage has no set manual, Bien's view is fine and so is Bright's .. What I've learnt from this episode is marry your type, I've met biens in the dating field and I've been frustrated but i want a marriage as bright describes it so i'll wait for that.

Im just 21 and I've been following this channel and i can say for a fact that I've learnt a looot

More convos from the men's perspective PLEASE

We need more such episodes. This dynamic really works. Loved every second of this episode. Also, set up a Patreon for the unedited version of the convos we didn't see perhaps? And maybe live stream once in a while, to interact with and field questions from your audience.

I appreciate how real this is, I hope you guys bring Bien back I love his perspective. Shivs openness is so refreshing. Communication is key.

thoroughly enjoyed the conversation and the honest input from the men. Jules questions were very much on point. Good stuff

1h long 😭....and I have an exam tomorrow at 8am...and am not even married but I still can't help but watch. I feel bewitched...😂❤ I hope you guys pray for your listeners...cause I'll need them tonight🙏

“Its not a competition” !! I needed to hear that😅and i know i’m not alone. Jeez yaani this was an hour long? Didnt even feel like it! I’d want to see Ivy and Shiv talk it out😂 waiting for part 2!

Ivy I love how you listen and internalise!And your point on how many things mum's do that go unnoticed and that can't be monetized 👍👍👍I stopped working and got rid of my dayburg,I reduced weekly shopping by a significant amount of money and I drop and pick my kids from school,I have saved my household over 50k monthly and I'm sure someone says I do nothing I just stay at home 🙄🙄🙄🙄 However my husband understands and appreciates and he gives me a stipend monthly

There’s no blue print on marriage, couples create your own culture.

Counselling + life coaching... Solid!!!!!! very good episode!

I never knew that I can be glued to a very long video on KZfaq. This is a nice one. I enjoyed it. Particularly the realness in the convos!

Best episode with the boys!!!!!!I've thoroughly enjoyed this ❤❤❤❤Very informative

Love, liked and enjoyed this episode. I've always wanted to know men's take, expectations and thinking on being a husband. Thank you

My question to Bien & Ivy. What happens when you allow your significant other to probably get involved with another person & they want more. What if they continue seeing each other? What if a child is born in that one night? What if his/her feelings towards you fade & get stronger for the other person? What if they contact an infection in that 'jibambe' night? Things rarely go as they're planned. The difference between human beings & animals is the POWER OF CHOICE. ONE NIGHT HAS RUINED KINGS, QUEENS, CAREERS, MARRIAGES & EVEN DESTROYED KINGDOMS.

Dope episode! I second Bien's idea of over 25 going for counseling.

Wow Bien ,that was an eye opener ,enyewe for ladies we build our world around guys,we need to get a life 🙆‍♀️

I propose a book called "Fair Play." It breaks down the invisible roles/ mental load really well.

This episode was crazy good, I enjoyed and learnt from every minute of it. Ah, what a bunch of amazing intellectuals!

Great video guys. Loved it. But aki let me just say that watching the part for men and babies triggered me. Here is why: I had a baby with my then-partner and I did absolutely EVERYTHING. From washing to feeding, to changing, to staying up at night...you name it. All of it. Mind you we were living together. Over and above that I was paying for all household costs with the exception of rent, so I was working as well. (We won't even go into the other things that were wrong with this relationship) I had zero emotional and physical support. My nanny was literally my crutch. (I was so lucky to have her, God bless her.)To be honest, I didn't mind chipping in financially, but this man gave me no emotional support whatsoever, so I grew very contemptuous and lost respect for him. It became such a toxic environment and I realized my child was feeding off that energy so I had to end it. But let me tell you, I'm jaded. I don't want any marriage/partnership/etc of any form, and I absofuckinglutely do not want any more children. That experience really did a number on me. It's refreshing to see the fathers in the video doing their part, but the lesson here is: Don't have kids with the wrong people :D

One of your best videos ever. This needs to be a series.

Hey guys! Loved this ep! Waiting on that link in the description for the article and the podcast please...

I love Shiv, it shouldn't be a competition on whose doing more. If one partner feels overwhelmed or need help they could communicate. Episodes with Men should be an hour or more, great episode!!

That was awesome love the show the guys view were on top. finding a balance between the husband and the wife is very important and as Shiv says mostly depends how your raised, is not about competing is how you compliment each other.wonderful👍

Great discussion guys!!Loved the different perspectives and the guys' input makes it even more interesting 💯💯

Really enjoyed this conversation! I think we should have a shiv and Ivy conversation after the article and podcast

The money conversation is so much needed. This episode feels like marriage counseling and I'm here for it!!

👌the best panel...🎉 can't wait for more...! Discussion to come... Great panel! Shout out to you guys ☺️😉

I completely feel Bien!!!! We really need to rethink relationships 💯💯💯 Great episode guys!!!

I love this episode... Going into marriage is very scary especially when you and your partner haven't had the hard discussions while dating. This has been enlightening. Thank you guys!

Am actually learning a lot from your episodes ladies, keep it up and God bless you. Personally I do everything from cooking, to washing, to cleaning, to be on toes with our children's education, to staying home with the kids, to ironing, to coaching my babies swimming and athletics and still be a husband. On the the other hand, my beautiful wife is hands on rent, school fees, power, shopping e.t.c because she earns more than i do. It's not a competition or some form of show off, but that's just how we live! Word of advice: Live freely, let it flow... If your wife is home late, get into your aprons and fix the kids something to eat. If she says she doesn't have money because she accidentally fell for a ponzi scheme thinking that she was investing, pay the nanny on her behalf and still pay for her salon, she's your wife for heavens sake... and vise versa! Upbringing really matters, so be careful when choosing partners. Don't go for her beauty or handsomeness and then spend the rest of your life fighting... Alaaaaaaa (in Atwoli's voice 😆)

Bien's level of self awareness is astonishing: I'm always taken aback and even jealous of his grasp of these concepts of life. Then add his honesty and just whoosh! His marriage must be something else.

Wow..Chiki is one lucky woman. I love the aspect of not owning another human being🥂 Don't lose your individualities because you're married 💯

Lorna said something about indoctrination *wanting to get married 🔥 Shiv talking about "it's not a competition on who works harder "🔥 Sauti sol B talking about Therapy Ivy talking about "non monetary contributions " The list is endless 😂 and this is me 🤭 enjoying shiv and shikies subtle romance 😂

I have been married almost 20 years and totally disagree with what Bien is saying. There is truth to the fact that one will meet attractive men or women throughout the course of one's marriage. The question I have, is ... do I have to act on the attraction??? Do I have to tell my husband about my crush. Personally, I CANNOT SHARE MY HUSBAND. I cannot stomach the idea that he has kissed another woman, like so, touched her like so... the same way he touches me, whispered those love things to her... then come home to me do the same. If he comes home and tells me ati some chick is hot... I will be like.. "why are you telling me?" as in what am I to do with that information. I expect him to sort that stuff out himself. The same way I do. Sort it out, crush it.. and keep moving. Crushes come and go. You really do not need to act on it!! Hubby is of the same opinion... I am not allowed to be touching and whispering love things to another person. We have watched many we know get divorced throughout the years and it has been rather sad. All the couples we know over 7 who divorced... the person they moved on to.. waliachana tuu!!!! Then there are those who stay because, he will turn around, ama, because the lifestyle is good... the misery.... the heartbreak. What Bien and Ivy are talking about is akina Will Smith and Jada entaglement situations... and hiyo... is not for me and I do not know how it even works for anyone. See how that kijana who was entangling with Jada.... ended up feeling. Him he was in love.. Jada was... doing her entanglement thing... in my eyes.. Will Smith lost major man points and I am willing to put money that Will Smith does not sleep with his wife!!!! IF people what entanglements.. they should not marry... Waache kuharibu the institution of marriage. The worst thing that can happen is for an entanglement person to hook up with a monogamous person! Woi...the heart trauma. PS. would also like to say that in a marriage you can also grow together... there is the idea that one person in the relationship grows living behind the other... that is a half truth. You can both grow, both evolve and the sex can get better... aki... it can....

Such great insights from y'all on relationships & marriages ❤️. Could listen to this over and over 👌🏾👏

I love how the guys always have a happy-confused look on their faces whenever the intro is being done.

What Ivy and Shive were talking about is the economical advantage men will often have over women. The previous gender role for men was to work and provide, while now women were expected to no house keeping. The gender roles and expectations for women as house keepers in the house have remained irrespective of the fact they have picked up new economic provision roles. Did men pick up any additional role? Some households men have made attempts to bridge this by also sharing house keeping roles. But what happens when child bearing comes in? Is it possible to share that? All in all, its a very valid issues that deserves a lot of airing and discussion and as Ivy said without both sides speaking from a point of arrogance.

Awesome content as always! If you could kindly add the link to the article referenced to? The Just Ivy and Shiv debate? Thank you.

This was a necessary episode... I have learnt a lot... invite the guys often.

What a time to be alive and have such content creators with this authenticity ☺️💯

It's the 'Should we join in the' Welcome to Over25' intro' faces from the guys for me. 😂

These conversations are exactly what I signed up for!!!

Marriage comes with change. You got to come out of a cocoon of singlehood ndo iwork. 'Kukaliana' in a good way. You can't be single and married at the same time, simple

I think a big problem I have seen is majorly two things: 1). Either/both partners think it's a competition 2). The sense of ownership (completely agree with Ben; make your own decisions I am not your property)

Loved this episode. I could feel the emotions in the voice as some were explaining their points. Which pointed to how authentic the discussions were. At some point though, the guys were mentioning about how they want their ladies to be working and then later one alluded how they wish their lady would stay at home and take care of the kids. Somehow felt like contradiction but I feel it clearly shows sometimes, it may be best to handle things on a case by case basis and not over-generalise one size fits all. Dope discussions. (We have headed to Jules call and decided to comment too.

If classes in UNI were taught like this...we would never miss classes. So engaging, interesting, educating...yani sat through a whole one hour to listen and I enjoyed, I did not zone out....

Ivy was 100% on point on the unpaid labour women have to shoulder being greater than mens and you guys should do a video unpacking it. Also, the article has not been linked.

Bien should remain in this channel for good😅his energy is as real as it comes ❤️

notification gang for suree🥰🤗🤗 another beautiful Monday and lawwwd don't I love this women 😍❤

The kind of conversations we subscribed for.

Love the fact that y’all are so mature about everything❤️Despite everyone having their own opinions❤️love it

We fail to see people for who they really are and expect them to be how we see them!

Ivy coming through with the pertinent questions! Yes! 😎

Bien-Aime is a really nice name. It's French and it means Well-Loved.

So educative...the point of you having your own life even though there's someone else! God bless y'all

Enjoyed the episode I wish it was more longer thank you though❤️

Biens wisdom 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 this is how all men should be. People might not get him but he is 🔥🔥🔥

I love loooove this conversation. It is refreshing to know that there are hands-on men with their kids, but could we have an episode where the men talk about the kids they had or might have had before marriage with other women who they are not currently married to? Like do they choose which kids to take care of and which ones not to take care of or how far can they go as far as taking care of these children? Or maybe how or why they can even choose to take care of the children in the current marriage and ignore the children from previous relationships.

Just 12mins in and Bien is making historical Points 💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾..Love to see my culture being so self Aware ❤️❤️❤️

Bien has some great points. You are meant to experience your partner not own them.

I loved this, but I have to challenge Bien's perspective of a focus on wealth building as his way of being husband. It is acceptable and it is a possible life but it has its costs. No amount of wealth or success can ever replace active presence and a middle ground is a necessity. In reality, there is often many people who can replace your course, vocation or the work you do on earth but your presence to your family has no substitute. You gotta find ways of making it count amid all the chaos and demands of capitalism.

more episodes with the guys. May these conversations continue being this long.

Mr Bien usually and always has very strong and real points which is actually the truth on the ground but people will really find it hard to embrace it

Very interesting conversation...keep bringing the dudes more often. Well done.

I love the space marriage creates for partnerships, with that said just the way we protect our business partnerships is the way we should our marriages. All the same I'm loving the series with the guys. Please have more episodes with them, it's great to hear a mans perspective.

THANKS OVER 25 for having our male counterparts on the show and discussing on how to being a husband or should i say a good respectable husband,some of us like me where brought up by a single parent who is most of the time are mothers so i didnt really experience that husband type of situations and know how things are supposed to be or not to be.It was a very educational episode and i have learned and noted a lot..keep it up cant wait for the next episode.. thanks gents and always looking spectacular ladies.

Every relationship /marriage is unique, you just have to find what works best for yours...

Everyone looking soo good but I could not take my eyes off jules today and she is such a vibe

Great episode imeisha haraka aje! Awesome moderation Jules!

I am not married but what I got from this video is that there is no one right way of doing marriage. If people want to run their marriage traditionally or in a modern way and they are happy with whichever arrangement, then that's that. Also, communication must remain alive at all times.

Leme leave my comment here coz I really feel this conversation .I think its all about partners understanding that, am here with you by choice. And am complete by myself..so you too should be complete by yourself. And this needs two healthy partners to really understand. That we are married yes, but am still my own separate individual from you, still with my dream career or job , friends family , etc, that you too should be in your own path, individually, but also as a couple we have want we do together.now the kids, finances , everything else .I think this is how a relationship gets to be healthy. And the way sauti sou is saying..if the chick gets the guy of her dream, enjoy babe, simply because he will never force her to be with him .she has freedom . he doesn't own her. I could write a book. Haha..but this thing needs you to really be a mature,complete person who loves their own self to understand

Whats an awesome panel,👌 👏 👍 😍 very insightful conversations.

Chileee thank you for making it 1 hour♥️♥️♥️♥️

Amazing episode.... also, we need an episode on everything monogamy and exclusivity with the guys 😊

Oh man! I just like the way Bien is so real 👍 with himself and anyone around him.

One of the better episodes so far!!👍🏾👍🏾

This episode was really eye opening ladies...keep at it ❤️

Truly enjoyed this episode; I've learnt a lot👏🏽

What Shiv said at the end ..the curtains story 🤣🤣🤣 so true ! We aren't always ready mannn

Much better moderation today. 👏🏾👏🏾

Jules did such a hyped intro, I was smiling all the way

This was a wonderful episode!! Thanks over 25 guys!!!

having Dr Bright on your channel. Aaaah. HANDS DOWN!!!!

This is one of the best ever episodes since my better half introduced me to your channel..... I've learnt a lot and the positive energy you people are giving out is immensely appreciated🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥......keep it up!!!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽