The hot cold routine is basically the addiction withdrawal routine, it's the hot that gets you hooked and the cold that makes you feel withdrawal. A sick sick feeling. Great video!!!

"at the end of the day you're going to have to choose who you love more: yourself or the narcissist" it's just striked me, thank you very much!

I've dated several narcs in the past. Defeating them is actually quite simple. Once you realize the game and whats going on, you simply abandon them during their cold phase or whatever. This is at their core what they fear most and is seriously damaging to them in so many ways. Before you know it they will be chasing you down doing everything they can to win you back, but you don't let them. suddenly you have them on the leash. :)

Narcissists are also emotionally immature (no matter what their age is) and are unable to show empathy. That's usually when they cut the person off. The partner/friend/spouse tries to explain his/her side of the story, and the narcissist will not hear it. And then there is the love bombing that occurs. After a period of time (could be days, weeks, months, or longer), the narcissist comes back out of nowhere and love bombs, drawing their prey back in. The cycle continues over and over until the abused person finally makes the decision to get out. (Although that won't stop future love bombing). Cutting all contact forever is the only way to be free of them.

This is scary accurate. This is what my ex did to me. I called him out, asked if he wants to be with me because his behaviour showed otherwise, he gaslighted me by saying "I wanted to be with you until you had to bring this up. Now I am not sure." And when I asked when can we talk face to face he ghosted for days and then broke up with me. Plain sociopathic narcissist.

I just cut out a narcissist. Thank god. I feel so much better emotionally and spiritually now.

Geez. To my knowledge I've never encountered (dated) a narcissist because by the second sign of "crazy" I'm out. Insecure guys that try to make me jealous by bringing up other women? Yes many of those but I'd cut contact at that point. If they thought they were giving me the silent treatment then I gave them the block treatment. If I begin to feel down about myself in the presence of the person I'm dating, I know they aren't for me. Best to not stick around and see what other damage they can come up with. Thank you for pointing out this behavior.

OMG. I was the host. You are so right!! He was punishing me during the cold. Holy Hell!!

Oh my goodness! I just can't with all the games. I have a feeling that I will continue to be single forever.

So a narcissist is like an abusive, controlling, parasite? They feed off your energy.

There is no one on KZfaq quite like you! You provide the best advice/information/input. You're incredibly calming as well! I've dealt with hot and cold and it's the WORST. When you think they're gone, they sneak back in. I was caught in a cycle for over 2 years with someone. It takes a lot of strength to ignore them and move forward but it's the healthiest avenue to take. If you stay, you'll slowly go insane lol.

I honestly wanted to die during the cold phase. The neglect got even worse.. he would do the tit for tat. He would avoid my presence and “do his own thing” after giving me 4 hours worth of off and on crumbs. he stopped giving me even crumbs towards the end. At this point 90% of worth was gone. I wanted to die. I even committed acts of self harm and he wasn’t even compassionate. He acted like an annoyed security guard at a mental hospital. I can’t believe people like this exist, considering he was so different in the beginning. Every time I thought something was good and we were okay, there he went confusing me again.. I would ask him what happened what’s wrong, what are we? His response was “this is just how I am right now. I can’t do this alone”. Vicious cycle over and over.

I chose loving,myself then the narc

I spent 8 months with a Narcopath. It was totally mind Fu..ery! Cognitive dissonance! You can never be enough for a Narc.

The next time a narcissist pulls one of their “routines” on you, send them this link. You only have one life, live it for you and not for someone else’s amusement.

I was married to a diagnosis psychopath for 5years. I've been no contact sense March 29th 2017. It's the only way. I just fully recovered April 2018. So a full year Wowzers. I'm proud of myself!

So totally with my ex. Storm out the door, never talk about issues. All because I stood up to him.

The fact that you don’t edit is amazing. I wish I had a fraction of your communication skills and not least your wisdom. Many thanks 🙏

Girl, I hate hate these GAMES!! 😩

Trust me a narcissist will contact you back and if you let them into your life once again then may be you'll regret this decision later. I use to believe that everyone deserves a second chance so i trusted her words but guess what she returned back after 5 years just to take her revenge (since i walked out of her life because she use to treat me like a piece of shit) So this time she took away every single thing that I use to love about my myself. I ended up being hospitalised with a broken back. I couldn't even walk for months and at the same time she left me. With such thought and unanswered questions in mind, being bedridden, immobile, dependent, and alone was extremely depressing. At this point, you become your own worst enemy. Life is funny isn't it! Sometimes someone teaches you a lesson just because you love them the most.

I have been watching narcissistic/codependent KZfaq videos for eight months now. This video hands-down said it all. I wish I saw this back in July

You are my favourite...meditation to get back to myself in the narcissist world around. Thank you for these free lessons.

Susan, thank you for making these videos about narcissists. I've been waiting for it for a very long time because I've always wanted to hear your sophisticated view point on this evil, insidious emotional abuse .

This explains what my crush has been doing to me: once showing really warm attitude, next time denying my existence, treating me like a piece of crap, just like that, without any reason! Everytime he would get close to me and show me affection, the next time he would make me feel not good enough, boring, annoying, uninteresting. I called him out on his tactics on messenger, dumped him and he blocked me right away. The next day he appeared with a gorgeous lady, to make me jealous. Every single time he showed affection, he withdrew it afterwards. I could see the pleasure in his eyes when he hurt me and left me confused, he was feeding off my suffering!

Thank you so much for this video. It provided me with what my narcissist ex wouldn't which was closure and common sense.

This literally gave me chills....NAILED IT! everything you said, just as you said it...wow, thank you for validating who that person really is. Broken hearts = Clearer vision. THANK YOU Susan!

Jesus, and I just saw the end of the video, too. Stonewalling me when I simply asked when/if he wanted to meet was his hallmark! In fact, the day I ended up cutting it off with him, I had asked him a simple question in the morning. "Do you want to meet at my place tonight at 7?" It was a yes/no question, but he literally ignored it for 8 hours. And he did that at least once a week the entire time we dated!

My ex did just as you said! I called her out on her hot/cold. 2 weeks of silence and she comes back in a jealous rage then tries to hurt me. Next day says “we will never be together” and cuts contact. A week goes by and she’s stalking me at the beach. Mind you, I have been doing 100% NC while this all unravels. Thank you Susan ❤️

BINGO!!!!!!! Thank you very much. It has taken me 10 years, but I am finally learning how to use this relationship to become stronger by understanding and building upon my strengths. To all whose lives are difficult because of your relationships with narcs, remember who you are. Stay true to yourselves. Your potential is far greater than you realize.

Why would any mentally healthy person want to be with a narcissist? They are sick, evil, and dangerous, especially if they are psychopaths, or sociopaths as well. They will gaslight you, and rob you blind. Run, run, run for your life!!! Also, praise the Lord I never loved that one.

This lady makes so much sense. I hate it that she is so right.

Susan I watch so many of your videos they have helped me so much. Thank you. This is exactly what happened to me. I'm so frustrated with myself for not seeing the blatant red flags. I've been involved with narcs before. I have been available for him for 4 months at his convenience. Huge connection on meeting soul mate stuff. Plays the victim for sympathy, but I think he wanted to move in due to dire financial issues. Just recently I told him I wanted to move ahead if not with him, I must respect that, but I need to move on. As he was not committing. I took some space, but he didn't fight for me. When we chatted eventually he said how he saw us living together as we have no drama. I felt like I was being a band aid for him getting over his ex and told him. Last week I texted for us to chat, he agrees. Next thing, posted all over Facebook is clear as daylight he's with another. I have played friend, counsellor, spiritual advisor and lover and I am left in absolute destruction..so cross with myself for doing it again. Clearly I didn't do enough self work the last time to heal properly. 💔😥

I don’t know what I would do without your straight to the point videos Susan! Thanks!

Hello! I let go of a narcissist over a year ago, as I did he was so startled and wasn't expecting me to go no contact. I haven't looked back. Your videos I just found today are clear and concise. Especially the insight where you talk about letting go of thinking about them. Wow! Still working on that one.... Thanks a million for your sound advice!

Another great video produced by the Susan Winter Machine. Dear, might I add the following: Give thought to suggesting to your viewers some good books on this (narcissist) subject matter. Doing so, will support what you have to say and may help some of your viewers get started on the road to awareness and permanent recovery. Final word: Bail out of the Narcissist/Supplier relationship. Feel your pain. Find the best therapist you can afford and start working on yourself. Explore, "why you valued this underdeveloped person over yourself." Much love, Zaum

On point Ms.Susan. went through this. I picked up on it immeditely and dumped him. He is losing his mind!!!

I’m currently in a situation where I can feel insane amounts of mutual attraction between myself and my work colleague, but unfortunately I’m that cold person who prefers to not show the them how much a care and I end up suffering in silence, but over time after seeing Susan’s videos and trying to learn I’ve noticed how great it feels to be warm to your crush and do things for them, you can also see how happy the person feels when you finally aren’t that cold hearted person you pretend to be, I do sometimes still find it incredibly difficult to be warm and affectionate but I am still learning. always remember, “When in doubt, love.”

Well this makes so much sense now. I’m being punished all the time it seems like. 🤔😑😒

After listening to this, I am sure I’ve been dating a narcissist for the last 2 years.. He’s been hot n cold this whole relationship and any little disagreement or argument, he wants to break up..

I watched so many videos of yours about Hot and Cold until I realized he was a narcissist. It wasn't that he was confused. It was that he was hoovering me. An argument could be made that anyone who willingly employs hot and cold is a narcissist. If they are trying to control you, you don't need to stick around and find out whether they are a narc or a player.

There was a girl I've known for almost a decade, since undergrad. She would often throw messages & memes about being insecure & alone, but whenever I wanted to meet up with in person, she would throw every & any excuse from the book at me. So recently, she reached out to me via IG, after not speaking to her for about a year. The girl was being all bubbly & asking "how I was doing, " to which I replied, "I will fill you in over some coffee." She asserted by saying, "no worries," two hours later, I get an abrupt message from her, saying, "sorry, can't make it. Family issues, lol." At that point she failed my test, & I was done putting up with her crap. I blocked her out of my life for good & it couldn't feel more liberating. Thank You, Susan, for reassuring me & your other clients to not put up with this type of behavior. Now I can focus on improving my life & find somebody who WILL respect me for who I am (whew, I rabbled on more than I intended). PS-More Nika, please!!!

I’ve even had “friends” on the narcissistic spectrum. It has just been SO one-sided with these people! I only hear from them on their terms and it’s all very superficial. Hot and cold sums it up, but really it’s more like cold and luke warm… I’ve learned to focus entirely on myself, because I tend to be a narc magnet! It’s all very frustrating. I’ve also been accused of being frustrating to them, but they are never upfront about things and there’s always seemingly an underlying agenda! Btw, we ❤ Nika and want to see her more often in these videos! 🐶

Fabulous video. I left my narc a year ago. He is still pulling the hot and cold on me - definitely a punishment. Seven years I went through the hot and cold cycles of punishment. It left me a wreck with terrible self esteem. Took up with a girl young enough to be our daughter, thats done my head in. He knows it too. He used his new supply to punish me too (classic triangulation!). My silence unnerved him so he came skulking back cap in hand to apologise. I can't go total no contact (kids, dog🙄) but being in my own power is helping me recover. I still love him. That's hard.

This is the best video on Narcissism I've ever watched. Down to a T!

I am going thru a divorce with a narcissist. I did not know what was happening to me. 16 years of hell.

Have been suffering this after my ex gf finally reveled her true form about 2 months or more ago. And then turns around and accuses you of everything they’re doing. It’s pure evil as far as I’m concerned.

The guy I was in love with exhibited this behavior. I literally felt hot/cold showers but never knew then of hot/cold terminology. He killed romantic attraction w/this. I do still love him as a person and actually feel bad f/him. W/out being shy, I was a great catch f/him-much younger and really loved him.

You are such a blessing!!! Because of you, I have a much better understanding of my situation! I'll continue learning from you, thanks.

Susan, i love your topics, amazing, you are a real down to earth woman, you have my total respect and i admire your work as well, thank you for helping people all around the world.

This is so accurate to the T. Breaks my heart

this video made me realise that I've been with a narcissist for 3 years and suffering and I thought it was about me being too sensitive. Hell no. The punishments... the making me feel bad.. the insecurities... and then the hot game... subtle flirting, touching, etc... and then cold again whenever I criticise him. Now we've been 3 months without intimacy,.. I bet it's another punishment he uses against me. I'm done. susan's words made me realise that I'm in a toxic relationship with a narcissist.

Thank you Susan for your expertise!! You are such a CLASSY LADY......and BEAUTIFUL as well!! Again, thanks for the insight! ♥️🔥♥️

I had a rebound relationship with a narcissist after my marriage of 22 years ended. I had never heard of the word narcissist (as I was cocooned in my marriage) until a good male friend explained it to me. The narcissist was a gambler, alcoholic, addicted to marijuana, bipolar, an emotional and physical bully and cheated on me the whole 14 months I was with him. He was hot and cold with me. When I asked him why he is so nasty to me and treats me with contempt, his reply was that it makes him feel better about himself! Funny thing is, I worked with him in the aged care industry for two years and saw a caring and loving man toward the elderly.

Hi. This is all new to me (5years) and I'm learning so much. I am in so much pain. But by watching and reading it's bringing it all to a head. I would like to thank you for giving of your time and knowledge to educate people like me. Because I now understand my life as it's been, I know I need to make a very important decision.

Oh yea went through this in my last relationship hot and cold he used to say he couldn't help it. It normally happened when i said i loved him he would go cold, so i stopped saying it, and other times it happened out the blue yep also if i asked to see him he would go cold then silence! It was a horrible roller coaster am glad im off it!

Yes, and I’ve also found that dating someone with adhd and kind of mimic this a bit, so if you’re dating them be sure to talk openly about it to them. The person I was dating also had bpd, but a lack of sincere apologies and gas lighting also makes me think she has some overlap with vulnerable narcissism, from what I’ve been learning. My point, if this person only has adhd they can get fixated on you and the relationship but then change focus not too long afterwards, so keep in mind that it’s not the same as narcissism, but! They also need to be able to work on communication about issues in the relationship because of it. Learn each other, if they aren’t willing it really doesn’t matter what they have, it won’t work. Just try to stay respectful in case they aren’t the narc, even then, be your best self when the crazy making begins:) good luck out here!

God bless you, Susan, for spreading your wisdom. You are an amazing woman =*

You are literally saving my life right now. You have no idea

Hi Susan! Great explanation as usual! I would appreciate if you could make a video about that group of confused guys who are controlling their potential of falling for someone. Thank you in advanced!

Dear Susan, thank you so much for all of your wonderful videos. I love the dress you are wearing in this video. It makes you look so warm and sunny 🌞😎.

I am soooo glad I came across your videos they are truly helping me I take notes as I watch so that I can implement your advice into my every day life I am going through some troubles in my relationship it’s either going to work or we have to go our separate ways as much as it hurts to even fathom but I love me more.

Thank you Susan. This video is so awesome! It explains so much! One of my all time favorite of yours!

You help me a lot to identify w what I’m dealing with. So many things you say are so spot on. This is EXACTLY how someone I talk to is.

I had a girl just like this. She had got out of a relationship. I was there to support her. She'd call me all the time wanting to see me. We'd speak on the phone at night for hours. We finally hang out and have sex, then afterwards she wanted nothing to do with me. I realized this and let her go. Then she comes back and acts like nothing happened. I refused to play this game with her so when she reaches out, I keep the conversation short. Her attempt to control the situation is to just not respond lol

I remember you did a video about trust and various reasons why you won't get their trust, I smashed the like button and kept it as a reminder for me especially when I heard you saying that they are holding back on trusting you because they themselves are dishonest, and that hit the nail on the head for me and I feel like that and narcissism come hand in hand, they can't trust anybody, they think everybody is out to get them (they probably are) so they can't let you get close because trust to them is a vulnerability, so they will let you get somewhat close and at a certain point push you out and they have to be this shiny object that people desire because that's better than the people who know them too well because they don't have to put an act on. The mask comes off for the wife and their families and they really are a terrible, abusive person who needs to control everybody. They even go so far as to install cameras to make sure the wife isn't cheating, tap your phone start listening to your conversations because they think you're going to betray them... It's like they have to be a step ahead of you. They have to know what your next move is going to be in order to know what to do with you they have to feel like they are in control because it makes them feel good, it makes them feel better about their selves

Awesome ending. I'm the strong man caught in hot and cold. Complicated too as she's in between married or divorce. Only friends in the church. I've done nothing flirtatious or immoral. There's boundaries of course, but I have boundaries too. Stepping away...

Thank you, Susan. Not only do you give wonderful advice, but the right one always seems to find me at the right time!

I’m going through hot n cold for over 2 years, n yes everything you just said is the story of life word by word 🤦‍♀️ thank you for letting me know I’m not crazy unworthy n loyal n a cheater. Thank you so much

lack of responding. This shed a light

I'm going through this :(( .......Once again, Thank you so much Susan

Thank you so so much ! You have no idea how much this helped me. I will listen to it often when I feel at my weakest.

Please make a video about women who bring with them bad habits from prior long-term relationships, why it happens and how to deal with it.

If only I knew about you and your videos a year ago... So much pain could have been avoided, so much time could have been saved.

Thank you Susan. I was with a Narc. Finally got out with no contact. I'm here to say that they do such horrible damage on a persons psyche. I'm still dealing with anger and resentment but am doing better. I would rather stay single( and I'm no spring chicken lol) the rest of my life than be subjected to such trauma.

HOT and cold may be also a reaction to someone's bad or mean disrespectful or unresponsive behavior or. For example : 1. kindness and pursuing stage mutual 2 mutual steamy engagement 3 the other person during a conversation is suddenly disrespectful or aloof or mean because to them you seem too engaged but what you really are you are open and transparent about how you feel what you want and you make effort - they feel like it's too fast for example and act out in a mean way- saying something mean or disrespectful / out of the line. 4. You initiate a cold stage after that-&you're backing off because it is not your intention to continue to warmup to someone who acts out or disrespects you or is mean to you for whatever reason or displays unhealthy or avoidant behavior. You tell them why their behavior was mean/ wrong and they get upset for being called on their acting out and start to act like they aren't mean interested because you preech or because they are upset. They could apologize on spot but don't do it and stay quiet. So you stay away from communicating them and quiet too. Next stage after you pulled away expecting an apology but you getting none - you have hopes to resolve this- & give it a time because you're an empath and hope to later try to figure out why they acted like it and give them a chance to undoo the confusion and give understanding. And so you reach out to communicate and they tell you act hot and cold, and they passively expect an apogy for pulling away, but really you're the o e who was disrespected and you're the one going out of your way in peace to understand someone who flipped in a mean way on you in a first place. Pride and self respect might cause Cold behavior on both sides now. You might be ready to understand them but now they push you away. What is this called? A misunderstanding? And Who plays hot and cold. The person who was disrespected or the one who was disrespectful unintentionally or intentionally which we do not know, because now there is a complete lack of communication.

Thank you for this video. This was my marriage. I finally got divorced. Now I keep attracting this kind of man, so now I’m alone. I can’t believe it happened to me. I didn’t meet my ex husband until I was in my late 30’s. Toughest thing I’ve ever been through. Advice for not attracting the same patterns?

Thank you susan for this great video , and yes yes yes they're excatly behave like you said.

Thank you for this. I’ve never looked at it from this perspective. The SOB is punishing me. Cause I don’t do what he wants, and I call him out on his bs. Thank you for opening my eyes more.

Susan! Thank you, you are so right with everything you say and you are able to guide me through letting go. Yes, I've talked to so many people and it is about CONTROL! I went through this many times last year with this guy, and he came back last week later thinking he could play with me again, controlling my emotions and also he is a narcissist. Attention seeking...he also has deep self esteem issues I am gathering. He wouldn't give me attention and when I would threaten walking away he would push back show a little bit of effort, then I'm back in the cycle of giving love. Also couldn't commit after a year of dating..but wouldn't let go. OVER IT!!! They are not worth it and will end up alone after his long line of girls give up.

I love hearing your pup 🐶 walking & drinking, sooooo cute🐶❣️

Love hearing Nikkos nail tappings❤️❤️

Wow. This is the answer of what happened to me. Thank you

Wow 5yrs with a nar.. hes just doing it again.. sent me a dear john letter and my keys and left the country, he knew i wanted a face to face goodbye.. every time i set boundaries asked for respect huge agruements, till i ask him to leave. Then we'd work it out again only coz im partner B... now hes in his home country all of a sudden hes unblocked me on fbk.. but still blocked on messanger.. just constantly out to punish me... no doubt ill hear from him

Hearing the background noise of traffic in your video reminded me how much I don’t miss urban living!

Dam i really did end up dating another narcissistic man. 29 days of no contact now...

This is exactly what I needed to hear right now at this very specific moment, yeah Narcissist ! That's what I had to deal with, Thank you soooo much for all your videos.

you are so straight down to the point with a good details.

I appreciate the effort you put into sharing your experience, as well as the effort in presenting your physical presence. Well done.

Omg! Right to the point! Exactly true! Love you Susan ❤️

"it could be a cold phase for a couple of days" haha I had to be agar that's EXACTLY what that person did to me. A week of being lovely and communicative and planning to meet with plans of cinema etc asking about tickets . Well as soon as I started to soften again THAT'S when he went cold. I saw it like I could read his brain right on target. He let's the phone ring off the hook, explaining 11 o clock at night with about 5 words. Seriously who does that ?? He says he will ring back in 20 minutes and by the time he does contact me again it's 48 hours later by which time I'm prepared and it's BYE BYE . You were not there to be my friend and your so called "punishment " completely lost you anything you were scheming to get from me so well done buddy and bubye!!! You pull that shit on me you ain't gonna last long , he won at his own game :) got the result he wanted . Pfft

I have just discovered you on KZfaq and think you are absolutely marvelous in your analytical analysis. Never knew that the world was such a screwed up place but in reflection, so much of what you say rings true. And so does your advice. How can we as mothers help the men in our lives to cope better with theirs and our, natures?

You give amazing advice , short to the the point and sensible . Thanks for your generosity

Thank You So Very Much For Sharing You Are Absolutely Right Ur Videos Are So Incredibly Helpful. I Have Been In A Relationship With A Malignant Narcissists For Over 5 Years He Continues To Punish Through Our Relationship. It’s So Very Hurtful

We had a great week. I managed to control lots of little moments that felt like my narc was looking for a trigger. She allowed me into parts of her life that weekend that she kept from me. I’ve been kept from many normal everyday things, and special events. I was thrilled. We went to one of her appointments with a friend, then I had planned to take her to a really great hidden gem of a bar, and a rooftop bar for sunset and night skyline. All night she looked away from me, she over dressed (I lived out of plastic bags I’d bring over to her place so limited choice), she avoided holding hands, and didn’t initiate any closeness whether hug, kiss, look, comment or even just standing next to each other in the elevator. I made attempts but got shut down. At the end of the night in the rooftop I mentioned to her about the distance and wondered if everything was ok. All hell broke loose. What I could have and should have done, I ruined the night, couldn’t just enjoy it, I’m controlling, I need to act like a man, I put her down, I was harsh and critical etc etc. Next day I tried to reach out to talk to her gently now that feelings had time to pass. She avoided contact, and broke up with me over a text the next day. 2hrs later, I was hurt, I was keeping my head down and to myself, and she went at me again for not saying hi to her at the gym. Then when she tried to call me and I told her I’d have to call back because was in middle of talking to 2 friends she lost her shit again in me. You can’t win this game. If you stay with expect to be tossed out for no rational reason. You can be as chill as you want, this type of person will find a reason. How you said something what you said how you looked etc. It’s so damn painful Pretty girl, smart in her field, very approachable and desirable. She feeds off this attention. Has a child, is getting older and knows she has issues but refuses it at the same time. People who know her through different relationships will notice the pattern. New people will also start noticing because I’m well respected too, and I have friends who know me. She can’t spin this victim story like she could in the past. She’s going to be all alone, or settle on something shitty because she just can’t do relationships. Hot cold all the time and to the extreme

Thank you I needed to hear this. I was seeing a guy and he was giving me hot and cold vibes. I just went to see him this past weekend and we had our fun. But he went cold after, no text, no call just radio silence. After 2 days I texted him,’hey did you get my text Monday?’ No response. It’s now Thursday so I finally text him for him to at least acknowledge that he got my messages by a simple ‘ok’ well he bombed me with ‘I’m busy and I just don’t want talk to anyone, you’re too much, just let things flow’ And I’m just so confused by this. I texted him that I just want to understand if he was still alive or did he get sick, why he wasn’t responding. He messages back ‘why was I controlling? Am I a narc?’😳 Like Seriously? I was so genuine with him and we had such a great time that I wasn’t about playing games so after he called me a narc, that did it for me. Deleted and blocked. Next!

I had a situation. Found a sext from there other squeeze, I questioned and it got turned round. Bonkers!!

I adore her voice...realistic and strong woman 💓

I didn't know what this was til I listened to your video I've never hurt so bad I loved him but felt Not good enough hot and cold was so confusing. We had amazing times, chemistry was unreal but I felt pain do deep in my soul there was a pattern I didn't see he would pursue me with hoy phase, then eventually fade away fur no reason discard Me I never can do this again I feel very sad and worthless after I gave my heart to him he didn't love me back healing slowly but lost trust will I ever be good enough for any one thsnk you Susan I wish I could speak to you in person you opened my eyes to this problem...... 👌

This fits with both men and women.

Your videos are well- presented, thank you.