Bonus Video: Dating As A Middle Aged+ Mam - www.patreon.com/posts/patreon-dating-38249685

Imagine going for a walk and Alexander comes out of the woods talking into his camera about how women think.

Confirmed: man walks for 15 minutes in Australian bush without being attacked be lethal animal

Women want what other women want.

is this where you bury the bodies, Alex?

I find it so strange and frustrating that men-women relationships are so COMPLICATED compared to platonic friendships

Women rush things even more than men if he is way above her smv. I see it all the time. I've experienced it.

Woman I’m dating: “Hey so...what are we?” Me: “Hmm... I need more data first, I’ll get back to you later.”

Women say they want something until they get it. Then they don't want it. They say they want a good person, but then they go with the obvious choice that isn't. Honesty is not a quality I have come to expect.

Haha... walking through those woods is representative of dealing with women. The scenery is pretty and uplifting, but you have to duck and weave as you try to make progress. You are always having to tread carefully. You are frequently jabbed by something sharp or pointy, and gasping and groaning is inevitable. You are rarely on stable ground, and bright sunshine can soon be replaced by storm-clouds and heavy rain.

True. The "where-do-we-stand" speech is to be left to women. If you don't do anything wrong, it is going to be her who will naturally come up with it after a certain time. Masculine energy is free and moving. It's the job of the feminine to lock masculine energy down.

"Dating market" says it all: nowadays the whole male-female relationship dynamic is just transactional... There's no room left for innocence and authenticity, only lust and power dynamics. In one word: disgusting.

Woah - you got out of your cabin/house!

This whole process is like applying for jobs. Don't close your options and tell the truth that you have other options. Employers will offer you more if they have a fear of missing out on you mindset.

I love watching these to remind me why I don't care anymore.

Welcome to 2020 where up is down and left is right...wake me up when people get smart.

Wrong, u can’t EVER EVER EVER relax in a lock term relationship. It can be 5 years. 10 years. 20 years. If it’s with a woman, it can all end in the blink of an eye.

I'm 54 years old and been in a single abusive relationship all my adult life. I've only just learned this stuff this year. What a waste. Thanks for your help and encouragement, man.

I did this mistake 5 months ago, still hurts man, but I learned

Your knowledge of female psychology and the female mind is incredible. You know so damn much about how they think and what's going on really got to commend you. I don't know how you obtained such massive knowledge but props.

extremely well explained! I was definitely guilty of this in the 2-3 years of highschool when I started trying to date - exclusively pursuing one specific girl, for months, even though she didn't give me any particular reason do do so; simply because I decided I wanted HER and no-one else. Not only I didn't give myself space to pursue other girls - it was far worse! I actually rejected every single girl that WAS interested in me, because it clashed with my interest in my chosen girl. Later in college I got a little smarter, and then things started to go much better. The funny thing is, after highschool, I didn't think that much about the few girls I CHOSE but didn't succeed in dating. I thought a lot more about the girls I REJECTED, and how they were perfectly nice girls, and how STUPID I was to behave that way! LOL.

I'm really grateful for your videos Alex. Been the "honorable" guy my whole life and never understood why I failed to establish even basic attraction. Your insights allowed me to recognize past mistakes and to grow personally. I will never be the same - thank you very much.

You can never give up game.

My God, the more I know and understand about vaginals, the more I understand about gay men.

If guys do this they are still stuck in blue pill thinking. They believe in ‘oneitis’ and the soulmate myth. They have a scarcity mentality too. They also think they are nobly and honestly bestowing their affection on a very fortunate woman and they are entitled to everything in return. They think a quality woman should appreciate them and respond. Its clear a lot of men have trouble with this, particularly if they self-identify as a ‘nice guy’.

You are so damn right, I just noticed that Ive done this many times

12:30 I believe it’s called, “sunk cost”

This is really sad... and pathetic that a man should play into a womans expectation of what she wants in terms of attraction.

That video was propably the one which made the biggest impact on me and I literally opened my eyes for the first time in my life. It was like waking up from the matrix, Thanks Aleksander!

Wtf, why haven't i heard this stuff before. Some awkward and very confusing experiences suddenly makes a lot more sense now. This video made me instantly more comfortable with dating now. Thanks man. Good stuff

This is why I subscribed to this channel! So insightful! I went through this exact situation. Alexander broke it down so well.

Excellent walk in the forest, sort of amplifies the information you deliver to us.

Been married 17 years now. I disagree on your dread game comment, well the first five steps anyway. Work to increase your desirability, and it will keep her attraction up. Now I wouldn’t cheat, but if the checkout clerk is attracted to you and your wife sees it, it will increase her attraction to you.

Wish I had seen something like this two years ago. Also seems like one has to get masters degree in psychology to understand mind of a women.

What if she interupts, when some girl try to flirt with me, but then she flirts with other guys on my eyes and be like ...please, he just a friend, don't be ridiculous

I've always said it myself that dating are the job interviews & that girl you want a real solid, healthy relationship with is the company you want to work for & retire from. Dating & the Job markets are similar.

Thank you for explaining this dynamic. Dating was never explained to me when I was growing up.

And even here, the discrepancy between how men and women think is portrayed as the man's fault.

My only gripe with this channel is that he doesn't do 10 videos a day.... my life would increase faster... learned alot from this channel...Lol.

I love this new background nature thing you're doing Alexander. Nice change from time to time. 👌Keep up the sensational content.

12:30 It is referred to as the 'sunk cost fallacy' and it is very common in life. The idea that you don't want your time or money to be wasted (sunk) changes the choices you would make. This is bad when it eliminates the best possible outcome or choice simply because "I've already come this far".

Very straight forward, lot's of insight in a short time. Good one!

Alex I know they said to social distance but you're taking it too far hiding in the woods.

If a woman likes you, she will let you know one way or another. If she wants to progress relationship, she will let you know one way or another. You as a guy just sit back, do the bare minimum, and thats it. Never ask a chick for kisses or more, because then you are turning her into a prosstitute, unless she is initiating it or giving you clear signals. If you want kisses, holding hands, or more, she has to be the one to initiate it to be legit or to be the one giving clear signals. Us guys want chicks to find us sexxually desirable, for them to find us yummy yummy, but us making the move on her is not the way unless she is giving us a clear sign or shes initiating it. There is no such thing as creating attraction, and this is a lesson that I learned the hard way by me thinking that I have to create attraction, that I have to make myself present in her brain by texting her first, starting many convos, etc. AND ANOTHER THING, if she is acting flirty with you, you have to make sure that she is really acting flirty and not just acting in a friendly/kind way (good luck differentiating between the two).

This is single-handedly the most important video one can watch to learn all the basics... Congrats mate

Thank for this video Alex, I can totally relate to this video from a previous experience, it’s so good to get clarity for this situation. Please keep up the great videos 😊

This is so good and helpful. Thank you for your great post!

Alexander Grace is hunting for chicks in this video

Great piece of advice Alex. Keep it up.

Very important video. All guys should watch this before they start dating.

Dating is a whole adventure, as shown here

Men are logical, women are emotional, it's always a tricky situation guys.

i am a handsome young man and growing up almost no girls talked to me except the extremely assertive girls. The only time girls started actually approaching and talking is when I talked to more girls in open social settings comfortably. When you have options more women notice 1000%. I went from talking to 3 girls in 3 years to 7 girls in 1 week. 4 of which literally approached me first out of nowhere, people id never talked to but went to school with.

Incredibly instructive video Man) Big thumps up for you mate. Those points you made were really brutally honest for me to admit. But yeah you are wright)

Great dynamic point. This is somethg I messed up on so many times. I've have to check in too much, and have too conversation suggesting my over clingliness or knowing a women direction of the relationship. Its Very difficult to negotiate but even more difficult for a man the is raise to be a co-dependent from toxic environments. You have to learn to cut things off, start new, and move on.

You should do more videos outside. You can hear the bass in your voice a lot more. In the home videos it sounds like youre whispering sometimes. Thank you for putting out this kind of information! Keep up the good work Sir!

I love your channel. You are so INTELLIGENT and have taught me so much about Female PSYCHOLOGY.

I'm sorry but even in a LTR relationship men have to keep women feeling that he has options. If you show full commitment at anytime in a relationship, you start to lose stock value. It's just how it is. Hate it, call it calculating, whatever. Why would you think that the female desire for someone who has options at the beginning of a relationship would magically disappear in 6 months, 2 years, or 20 years? Is it the ring? Is it living together? No sorry you need to always make your woman know that if she's not showing her full attention to you, then some other woman is quite happy to fulfill that role. I'm not talking about cheating, but linger and smile with a girl at the bar while you know she's watching. When she mentions it, she's going to mention it, give her a nonchalant "Hey at least you know your still will a desired guy." She doesn't know you really talked about the performance you just saw or whatever to get the girl to engage for a few seconds. Show up late a few times with weak excuses. Let the perfume girl put a little on you as you leave the store. Tell her the whole truth of why you smell that way, but be a little flustered. If not, she's looking for that excitement elsewhere, and stepping up because your stock is falling in value the more content she is at home. Contentment is boring, the string is just a string all of a sudden.

Dude you are so wise. Wish I had stumbled upon you 12 months ago. Would have spared me a lot of pain.

I just wish i had this vod a while back and hadn't learned this the hard way.... Excellent content

thats heavy parkour right there!

That's a very good summary of many subjects in only one short video

It's called an Investment Paradigm. It happens to people who have spent years in cults, but who have realized the cult isn't what it pretends to be.

Thank you! This really put two and two together for me

Great content. I was completely blind before this, thank you Alexander

Thank you, AG. Great topic and video. The outdoors setting is pleasant, I love the change of pace. There is a difference to be accepted here, between those not genetically gifted and those that have more expansive options, yet the theory remains sound. Yes, those less gifted must first pull themselves out of scarcity and into abundance before considering the pitfalls waiting should you dispense with a certain amount of stoicism and lose your frame in the initial observance stage of a pairing. This is why Self is the first step in the Pyramid of Grace. Sort yourself out first to arrive at a place of abundance. The fact is that you will be accepting a disadvantage if you try to build a relationship while existing in scarcity because you have no abundance to leverage, no security or safety in yourself, so how can you offer any of your abundance to her. Yes, using logic and speaking plainly can indeed backfire in the early stages of a pairing when you are still observing each other. Don’t ask for exclusivity or commitment, take leadership over demonstrating through actions, your willingness to share your abundance with her. Be the best deal for her, don’t tell her you need her business (she may be left wondering at the value of something obtained so easily.) Done correctly, it won’t be long before she starts to drop hints, subtle and not so subtle, that she needs to secure her investment in you via commitment. This is where your observance of her pays off - in recognizing the signs that she is needing this security. If she is not interested long term, then your observance of her should reveal that within, say, a month or six weeks - depending on how much time you spend together. Increased time together may well be the first signal she may be entertaining thoughts of longevity in the pairing - she is seeking to command the lion’s share of your time. Anecdotally, there came a time when I received a text (second or third date with a Woman) from another Woman asking if I was free. As my phone was face-up, my date saw this - oh grief, where hast though led me. She asked if I was seeing other Women, and so I told her. I said that I had no more control over someone pursuing me than she had control over other men interested in her and that this was a good thing because it makes each of us choose to be with each other despite the options before us. I continued that I didn’t even need to ask myself the question of whether or not she had other men pursuing her as it had nothing to do with me, those were choices she had to make. I told her she could reply to the text from the other Woman, but to please to do as she would reply to a suitor who texted her - she replied “Thanks for the invite, but I’m seeing someone.” I said that was fine and she sent it. We started seeing each other much more regularly after that and then it happened again some days later with a text from a different Woman, and this time she replied “Thanks, but I have a girlfriend.” Not so subtle a sign from her and we didn’t have “the conversation.” There are ways for this to happen naturally. The point is that observance is key - look for the signs and they will manifest one way or the other. Putting forth the idea of commitment before establishing, through observance, how you communicate with each other, is likely to feel like pressure to her unless you have both established that is specifically a sooner rather than later goal in your pairing strategy. It’s complicated, filled with nuance, but I submit that ultimately observance of each other will see you through. My best to you and yours. Looking forward to your next.

I like that your accent is light. As an American, its appreciated.

i already realize this fact after some experience with girls even in my teens, like how I always suddenly got more popular with girls when I was actually seeing someone but for some reason it's hard to even get to talk to any of these girls when I was single. yet even until now, in my late 20's, I'm still emotionally incapable to court more than one girl at a time. I just have to know for sure that I have no chance with one girl before moving on to the other. it doesn't mean I'd rush it. I'd still work on making things flow naturally, but one girl at a time is my limit. trying to see other girl to boost my options proved to be detrimental to my overall emotional situation (including things outside romance).

Awesome speaker, exceptional ! Great content, analytical and relatively unbiased

i'm glad I'm not the only one who goes for walks in the woods and talks to myself

Alex, I kinda like how sometimes you make your videos outdoors, especially in woods. Different backgrounds and settings can be refreshing especially when we're talking about topics such as these.

Man, I can't even describe how much I needed this vid. Thank you, thank you.

Real good advice! I am 60 years old and would have been glad to know this thirty years earlier.

All in all, I loved this video Keep the good work

Your quick wit never fails to get a chuckle from me

I wish I would have seen this video much earlier. Thank you so much, Alex!

Great information...thank you!

Alexander, do you have a book out? I enjoy your videos a lot and would like to learn more.

Hey Alex, I like your videos. My only complaint is the audio is low in all the ones I have seen. Other than that it's great content, keep it up!

Yes you right. I used to be too fast to try lock in. Most of those relationships crashed.

Thanks for shattering my world view. I mean it sarcasticly and honestly. The dynamics between men and women has so many layers with shifts and turns, it melts my brain. Thanks for sharing this.

Love the videos mate

This video was extremely helpful, thanks man

Good lessons thanks

Thanks for this Alex, definitely guilty of this!

always great stuff Alexander Grace

This is just what i needed to hear right now after a girl i met showed to have a boyfriend in a bad relationship and is now indecisive what she whanna do and i feel like a lost glove that none is looking for.

Great video. Thanks bro.

Just to let you know, Alex. I've disagreed with things you've said before, but I really appreciate the efforts you go through to inform others how the opposite sex thinks. You're doing good, honest work.

So men should have open relationships until they pick a mate?

The time to prepare for an excellent LTR is before I have any kind of relationship. I observe way too many people invest their scarce time, energy, and money in becoming a wage or salary earner, but spending hardly anytime studying and learning what makes for great relationships. That seems so very strange given that in today's world chances are you could end up in a dozen different jobs over the course of a lifetime, but people invest hardly anytime at all in understanding the opposite sex?

This was a good reminder. I’m seeing a girl I really like. She has openly told me she likes me and isn’t seeing or looking for anyone else, but she wants to move real slow. So I’m taking it slow. But I never said I wasn’t still shopping around...so I am. It’s a good dynamic but feels a little odd. I guess I’ll just keep going with the flow and see if she wants to date exclusively.

This initially annoyed me as I'm British, and will usually only date one person at a time, but on reflection I've taken this on board & will now try messaging other women on the dating site even while (initially) dating one...

"sunk cost fallacy". Once again, sound advice!, Thanks!

2 years late Alex haha. Oh well, I learned a lot about myself and others trying to understand what happened and why. I gradually came to this conclusion more or less on my own but god damn it was confusing and painful.

Ok I am definitely guilty of this lol. Well now I know how to stop that, thanks

thanks alexander this video was illuminating

Alex, ever heard of Patrice O'Neal? He was a legend of a comedian who touched on a lot of the issues that you describe in your videos.

That's awesome! I do these ridiculous things all the time.

I love how the dating scene has a scoring system for men and women, call girls and guys low quality and high quality, and all these terms that make dating as a whole sound like buying and selling products. It's very sad and disappointing. Glad that I'm not participating. Good luck guys. You'll need it. Also, if these points are valid, then the world is an even sadder place than I thought.