I cannot imagine going through psychosis in high school. It was hard enough dealing with it in college. I'm sorry you had to experience it. Glad you came out the other side. You're right high school is hard enough without complex mental illness. Great video as always 👍

i love hearing your experiences with psychosis and especially being a young adult or teenager with psychosis. Mine was creeping up on me as a kid but broke out my freshman year and started peaking about senior year and got diagnosed with schizoaffective on my 18th this year and i just graduated and actually am in the hospital for mania (its manifested into some sort of psychosis) typing this right now 😭.It helps to know that i wasnt alone in having the worst highschool experience known to man because it really was chalked up to the best years of my life as a kid and i felt like i was missing something. I hope it gets better because im really struggling rn :(

thank you so much for making this video! i’m a high school student also living in seattle, i don’t experience psychosis, but this is very helpful to me in understanding people i know who do 💗

Thank you so much for every video you have posted. You're, unfortunately, quite right regarding having insight about a medical issue one might have. I do my research when I feel there's something wrong with me and a lot of medical professionals have taken it as an insult and a threat to their expertise. In a way it's a good thing, I know to look for a different specialist right away.

I love the music you pick for your vids. It reminds of if old-school hip hop or something. Weed is torturous... it pains me to see ppl with these types of illnesses smoking weed😮. I hope all is well, love the vids!

THIS IS CALLED STUPIDITY. NO OFFENSE BUT DAMN. "ALIENS"

Thank you for your videos and for being so open. As a side note, I wonder if you'd consider not adding background music? I think it would be more impactful without that as a distraction. ❤

Wow your mom is so sweet and insightful ❤

You need to do a TED talk!

Thank you so much for this video- I haven’t yet been able to write down the details of my hospitalization or even tell someone the complete story and it was years ago - it was so helpful to hear someone talk about it ❤

Ive heard the "music"

Is there an explanation why there are never positive hallucinations? Let's say cute bunny talking funny. I mean, anything that is happy or relaxing? Why are the senses can only outburst with terrifying and uncomfortable things? Why bugs under the skin instead of a butterfly sitting in your hand? Why all psychosis are a some kind of a torture instead of let's say in simple definition a lovely daydream? I can assume crisis can invoke psychosis because maybe reality is unsettling, but why the brain makes the situation even harder instead of putting one's mind in a nice state, even if not real. Why all hallucinations are of bad things? Did someone figured this one out? Why does the brain makes such crazy BAD stuff instead of GOOD? I really have to wonder about that. Of you still don't understand the question let's take example from nightmares and sweat dreams. Both unreal. But good dreams have no special reason too. Yet the brain can create them while sleeping. So hoe come there was never a "positive" psychosis reported? Like "I lived in a magical valley eith unicorns and adorable little furry naive pet". If you get me. Why is it always do dark and damned and nightmare-ish???

I have DID but my psychotic episodes were caused by a contact-high I got from a neighbour in my apartment complex smoking copious amounts of marijuana which was coming through the ventilation system. I'd love a video on how you avoid/manage triggers like this

This is really similar to what I experienced: being on fire, dismemberment etc. I went through ritualistic abuse as a child, so I also relate to the trauma of the psychosis intertwining with traumatic memory. You're not alone. x

Was marijuana a part of every episode?

I’m watching your videos now and it resonates with everything I’m going through right now. I haven’t been diagnosed or anything, I’m not on meds yet, but I’m constantly on this paranoid state believing everybody is conspiring against me, someone is going to break into my house and m*rder me and my two baby daughters, someone is going to kidnap them and do horrible things, like r*pe and m*rder or kidnap me, or s*ab me, I’m absolutely horrified about 🔪. I’ve mentioned this to my friend s and family and they all say I’m crazy, none of that is real. It feels very real to me though. I’m constantly thinking of how I’m going to defend myself when my attacker comes. I’m looking into buying guns and other self defence stuff which sounds completely nuts to my friends. I feel like I’m losing myself, I’m constantly living in fear. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist next week. Let’s see how it gets. Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience 🙏🏻

How do you gain insight? Does psychosis end in time? I know the time is different for everyone but how does it end?

Have you ever considered spiritual interference as the cause of your condition and that it really isn't you or your brain.

I completely understand! I needed weed more than food at one point, i couldnt live without it. Would wake up and have a few cones, all through the day, most of the night for about 4 years straight. Definitely contributed to my psychosis. A lot of the medicinal pot now is so so potent, its not surprising more and more people now are experiencing psychosis

Does the lack of insight just go away in time. How do you come out of it if medication is not working.

Your honesty is so inspiring. I have never tried any drugs, alcohol a few times when i turned 21. After almost losing my life during psychosis I'm petrified to drink with my antipsychotics because im afraid of going back into psychosis. I love how you tied your story into long-term recovery and it's truly inspiring.

How did you get out of the depression?

Amazing video, Carolynn. I'm working my way through your content so I can figure out my favorite playlist of your videos. I want to show them to my daughter when the time is right. You mentioned you still cannot work? Have you ever considered being a peer support specialist? you'd be amazing at it!

Thanks, Carolynn, for another helpful video. I always appreciate how much thought you put into them.

Hey. You look good. I have five years clean and sober too. But I had learned to drink very moderately, like one or two beers every two or three months. I have not smoked pot since 1995. I wondered about addiction and how I don't have it very severe. I did come into the na fellowship at age 17 initially. And maybe god saw that I shouldn't have severe mental illness and bad addiction. I do want to use often and I'm not going to meetings. I read the na basic text a couple of years ago and knew about all of it because it was the language everyone spoke when I went to meetings a lot. I don't know what it's like there now in my hometown. A lot of good people who worked all 12 steps relapsed so be careful! You have ups and downs in recovery like my guitar isn't always a joy to play ...

I became psychic about 10 yrs ago and got sucked into stories not true, I realize now. But they were so real until just recently. I thought my creativity and 'downloads' were real and a lot of us very sensitive Souls came here to help heal the Earth. I was functional and in reality until 2018. I got more and more tired and did less as time went on though and more and more emotional. I wanted to leave job to DJ because felt 'guided'. I stopped medicine before left job and family was like dont leave job and when I left job things got weird. So much pain with fam. I was so into spiritual stuff and took on I was healing things from ancestors, collective, & my own personal stuff. Id be in so much pain and not able to do things I wanted when wanted. I could still somehow sometimes do things and it was basically only times felt normal, until 2020 Covid hit and lost it, got so weird into mystical highs and insane lows...started to not be able to walk normally, pains on right side and couldn't do anything but lay outside, eat and shower and after shower Id feel spent. It got worse and worse until in bed most days in pain and my story became Id have forgiveness breakthroughs and could somewhat function. I had this whole story of divine masculine transformation n right side masculine side of body. I stopped showering and hardly eating...it all was very energetic and psychic. Strange body sensations all the time laying. The story is kundalini electric energy moves up spine and I have it today and strange pains all over body all the time & I feel that is all real, but it's not something to make your whole life as it fucks with nervous system..bc it seems something is happening to brain and body when brain is in a different state...I wasn't grounded at all n it took over. It became the recent solar flares affected me and felt so much energy and had inflammation n not normal health issues and vitamins affected my health bad bc nervous system couldn't handle and I basically became manic and so out of body and Im in so much pain struggling to find a way to feel normal again after years and years and years of not really functioning...I only recently learned I was delusional with everything and people think the kundalini is not true too but I don't know man I feel so much weird energy in body and I lost all my money and family has to get food for me and can rarely shower. Im praying nerve medicines will help. O feel like I have the worst untreatable condition because of the fire energy from spiritual shit. I don't know the biologics of it but it's not usual. And maybe just all of it is because of brain and beliefs I picked up by have no idea how to not have it happen. Im terrified I won't get better bc my ride side of body wanted to control everything and I felt in pain trying to do things it's so weird. And when became manic it got out of control and I just paced couldn't do anything bc I lost how to feel normal and balanced and just do things regularly in life. I basically wasn't here for years functioning as a normal human. For years my right side hindered me just doin things normally and I never had my energy. I was just like out of body or dissaciated whole time. And yes was bartable to talk, message people, call people like my Soul enetwas gone from body. I wonder if anyone else in psychos not into spiritual stuff feels energy in spine. I mean something really is happening in brain that affects body with it and I honestly feel it can be done stably and healthfully if the body is staying connected to reality as well. I pray for any help and advice. Thank you for your video. This is all so interesting to me because Ive never had hallucinations and was never out of touch enough that I couldn't realize what I or others were doing. I just literally felt in another dimension and like nature for example felt so magical sometimes, like fairy land, best way to describe it. I had such a deep belief time travel was possible and Ive ven noticed a my fone time go back then forward again and I felt I went in a steamy bathroom before someone showered.. I believed like spiritual stories were real and the Earth was going going through a transformation into being more loving, truths being revealed. I still feel in some ways it's true like what happened with Covid. But I got into Matrix movie beliefs and just ignored current stories bc painful. Fantastical stories and beliefs about making billions and guys leaving gfs for me felt so true and kept believing even though my health got worse and worse....My family thought I was schizophrenic and tried to get me help and I was against help thought I knew what I was doing. I fought so badly with them. Was so dark. Awful. It just took over. So not me. I never would fight bad with my fam or friends and we all had great relationships. Yes exactly, I worked with a woman that believed what I did and encouraged the fantasy and I don't she realized I was very out of touch too bc she was like we are mean to be here witj people in what is real. I do feel I have psychic gifts like I can experience magical energies and creative things but again it's like functioning psychics they r in reality too. Yes n Ive been thrown into medical world havin to face reality bc health not good and it's like ugh wish I hadn't dismissed it all and took care of health and mental health. I wish O stayed on med n did therapy yrs ago before it got bad. I was against med n therapy at time it got bad.v

I’ve had psychosis 3 times, my 3rd one I just got out of the hospital 3 weeks ago and these videos have educated me so much. These should be in psych wards honestly. Thank you so much.

Thank you for your vulnerability, currently recovering from my 3rd psychosis. Tore my life apart and full of embarrassment and shame, my family is religious and thinks it’s more spiritual than mental health. These videos help me stay in reality so much. Thank you again.

Thanks for making this amazing video!! How is your reading comprehension today and how did it get better ? I was diagnosed in march with schizophrenia and thought this was only happening to me. I’m in college and my reading comprehension and retention is what I’m having problems with as of now 4 months post psychotic episode.

This was excellent. I would not have had the (current) capacity to research this information and put it togther so well. Thank you for this..

*you have families of jinns living in your body and brain. Its their chatting noise.*

*you're clairaudience and see jinns around you.*

*thats a jinn demoness stalking you.*

*pregnancy delusion isn't fake. Lots of human women victims get impregnated by jinns and get pregnant with immaterial children and then the jinn comes to collect children when the Human woman is asleep. Youre breeding jinn children.*

*can I come inside you?*

*omg hot nymphosisters.*

Seriously dislike the hospital very triggering for me. My former psychiatrist was the head of the psych unit in the hospital closest to my house. My new psychiatrist is a stand alone doctor in her own private practice. Just the atmosphere is far less triggering.

Yes to all you’ve spoken of.

I've been hospitalized some forty times. I don't want to go back but at one time I preferred being on the inside. I think that is called institutionalized. But I got over that.

Had a psychosis a few years ago from substance abuse. Still trying to recover, thank you for this video! It’s the first time hearing somebody talking about this and now i feel understood. I had to be admitted for 2 weeks and on lots of medications, since then life hasn’t been the same

Hey, thanks for the shoutout! I loved this video. Thank you so much for making this. ❤

It can take days weeks months and years ro recover fron one episode.

I have this also, yes or no

Yes, disabling in day to day life! I have lived in phycosis for 9 years now. 24/7 365. It has made me fall fromy own family😢 it hasase me this k my family has been a part of the disabling my mind and body! Not only does this affect my mind it's emotional and physical abuse as well. She is explaining very well. Pleaseiatwm as she speaks

I always love your videos 🥰 Thank you for being so open and willing to share your experiences and advocating for others in the community.

Thank you Ms. Carolynn . You have humbled me, made me aware of my ignorance to this subject, and have enlightened me, educated me, provided me with perspective and understanding. You have made a Positive Impact on my life , and perhaps made it possible for me to reciprocate to others . Experience is the Best Teacher , and You make it shine in a positive light . Thank you.❤

I hope the job hunt is going well for you! 🙏🏻 im in a similar boat, still recovering from a first psychotic episode in January and looking for work. So daunting as i feel ive lost so many skills, work related and socially

what zodiac sign are you?

Very I formative and educational video, thank you from the❤

Great video! Thanks for all the info 😀