Our son is autistic and the “professionals” said that he should be in sports, which translated to us becoming coaches for a team of four year olds and watching our son check out the insects in the grass while other kids ran around him aimlessly kicking at the ball. As an “artsy fart”, it was the most stressful summer of my life. He ended up being an artsy fart in the end and life became good again. Every time we drove by the soccer fields, and watched parents sitting out in the rain, both of my kids, in unison said, “You’re welcome Mom!”

My proudest day as an unwilling soccer mom was the last game of our daughter’s first season. She was the only player on our team who hadn’t scored a goal. With only seconds left to play, she had control of the ball and raced down the field toward the goal. Every parent on both sides was cheering for her to get the ball into the net. The ref looked at our side in confusion as we all whooped and hollered for her to keep going. You see, not only had she blown the whistle to end the game but Amanda was headed to the wrong goal! The ball sailed right past her teammate playing goalkeeper and right into the net. Our side exploded in congratulations for her success. Nearly 20 years later I haven’t told her that her first goal in soccer was for the other team.

You missed the stage early on where Dad decides to coach the team, and Mom is then responsible for signing everybody up for the game snack schedule. By high school, our kid chose water polo, I think because it was the only sport we knew absolutely nothing about. He really enjoyed it, though.

I was a music major and never did sports. So when my son signed ip for soccer I was very new. The first time we were headed to the field as we were rushing out the door, I hollered "Hurry! We have to get you to soccer rehearsal!" I think my kid's sports career is already doomed.

Spending my life in youth sports (well, 48 years so far) I can tell you one thing: Youth sports is rarely about the youth. It's about the parents and coaches.

Watching this, wow, the part where Kim jokes about feeling validation as a mom bc the kid does well... that really hit home for me. My 17 year old daughter has done gymnastics since she was 18 months old. Started competing at age 5. She has just her senior year left, with no interest in doing collegiate. Her gymnastics has consumed our lives as she has "moved up the levels" of USA Gymnastics. I think about the meets over the years & how on the days she was successful I weirdly felt like I had played a part in winning those medals. And then when she would have an inevitable "off" meet, I would feel such disappointment. What kind of message has my body language been sending my child for the past 12 years? I really hope she doesn't think that my love for her is conditional based on whether she sticks her landings or adds an extra twist in her tumbling. (When she gets home from school today I think we need to have a very real talk about this... I need to make sure that she's doing this extremely challenging sport bc she loves it & not bc she thinks it's what I want her to do.)

So true! We threw in the towel after watching our son sit on the bench every week and not get to play in his basketball game until the last 5 seconds of the game. When he said, " I just want to play with my friends," that was that. He has done rec leagues where everyone gets to play, and we're all happier.

I interviewed an at-the-time stay at home mom for a job once. The job clearly advertised the work day started at 7am. But all she talked about was driving her middle school son to his (non school) hockey club games that often went to 11pm on week nights sometimes 1 1/2 hours away. Like the game from the previous night of the interview. It was a strange interview for many reasons, but I just remember thinking how a job for the mom wasn't the family's priority, their son's hockey club was.

My kids , 10 and 12, and doing recreational soccer. Most of the kids in their classes do the competitive tournament league. I just want my kids to learn sportsmanship, meet new people, and stay in shape.

This is so accurate that it’s painful to watch 😂

I was so relieved that I could objectively say my kids were "meh" as athletes. We all enjoyed their sports years, but felt guilt-free about moving on. I hope your family can also look back with fondness someday.

Expense is definitely directly correlated to success in sports! 😂

Oh man, some of this is spot on. When our daughter was going into first grade we wanted to explore putting her in soccer, so the summer before we went to a parent meeting at the school. Everybody in that meeting (except us) had been doing competitive soccer for years prior. They mostly all knew each other and were super-serious about it.

When my children were young they were into figure skating. We had one rule: When it stops being fun we stop doing it.

“Back in my day” we just played whatever sport was in during that season and moved on to the next one every few months.

We tried a few sports😂 Honestly Karate has worked out very well for us, he's been doing it 7 years( he's 10😂) He may not ever be Bruce Lee 😂 but the support they give our family in many ways is invaluable.

I wish that I could get parents this interested in having their kids participate in Scouts.

you need to one about the drama of youth sports! all the parents, switching teams, alliances with other parents!!

Love it! And also oddly similar to our experience with our daughter's ballet. (Except she did love it for about 7-8 years but now literally prefers her "improv comedy class" 🤣)

Oh man this is so true. Going with that for our oldest for basketball. Never had any of these as a kid. After so many years of violin she got tired of it. In the end we just have to make sure our kids are happy. But she is just so good (not biased at all 😂).

Spot on for so many parents! We opted for the recreational sports league route, and then my oldest opted for cross country and track in high school. My youngest loves swimming. Thankfully, listening to our kids was step #1 for us.

Spot on!!! With two boys now in college that played travel sports for years, this is hysterical and sooo true!! Great writing ✍️

1. Total Ignorance 2. Just for Funsies 3. Competitive Curious 4. Drop Everything 5. Schedule Shock 6. We Forgot Our Kid

We'd been on a short vaca, and I walked our 10 month old out to see daddy hit a bucket of golf balls ... but our son started reaching out like 'daddy! pick me up!'', but grabbed his golf club😂 ... we were ... ?? dropped a ball by the stroller and our son hit it, omg. Well ... over the yrs we certainly couldn't afford fancy lessons or trips to expensive golf courses, but our son did play along with my hubby growing up❤. He did a league in his teens but it was stressy and didn't do it again. And worked at the golf course near us, for a Summer. He felt burned out and by 16 took a break from it. We didn't pressure, though was kinda sad because his swing was pretty natural and he played well. Zip forward and now at 28, he and some friends decided to hit some balls again😊. He was surprised his swing was still there! My rambles lead to- we lost my hubby to brain cancer in '21. Golfing again has brought happy memories of times with dad❤, he misses him soo much(we all do❤💔). But also a confidance boost-yep, he has a great swing still😊 🏑. And gets fresh air out on the course 🌞!

My parents clearly missed the memo on how youth sports go. They didn't try to sign me up for anything. They just let me decide one year that I wanted to play basketball and two years later that I wanted to quit and do color guard and drama club instead.

Been there, done that. Our son got a scholarship to play college lacrosse. After a semester at school, he hated it and came home. I kept thinking "all that money we spent" on traveling teams, coaching, equipment...gone. But then I realized HE wasn't happy. He loved lacrosse, but college wasn't his future. All I want is for him to be happy & we did that for him, not us.

We just signed our 7 year old for her first sporting thing: swim team. Pray for me 😂

My son does gymnastics. He's almost four. I signed him up cos he was climbing everything in our house and had so. much. energy. There's definitely some moms there who are trying to live their gymnastics dreams through their kids.

I coach my daughters 10u softball team. I had parents talking to me about what positions they wanted their daughter to play because of potential college scholarship opportunities.

Summer after kindegarden we let our son start trying out some sports. We said he could try each one for a season that year. He would then need to pick 1 that he really liked (if any at all) and he would try that one for full seasons. He chose soccer. Every weekend in the summer. Practices 3 x per week. But he loved it. Over the next few years he played different positions. We signed him up for summer travel soccer ( sometimes 150 miles each direction). Every weekend there were out of town tournaments. But those coaches worked with him and found he was good as goalie. He was hard on himself sometimes, but still loved it. Fast forward to 1st year after high school graduation and he traveled to Nicaragua to a Missions school. One of many ministries was bringing in the village children to play soccer. He loved it. The kids loved him - partly because he was very white and had a bushy beard but also because he was 6'4" and good at soccer. He was blessed to be able to minister to some of those children and some were even eventually baptized. Knowing that made all the hassle and time and money worth it. Goes to show that even sports can lead to ways to bring Glory to God! 💞💞💞

Funny and sad at the same time! 😂😢Too many adults living the good old days through their kids and thinking the kids love it because they did and still do.

Our local soccer club had kids trying out from 6. It was insane. I wanted my kids to play for fun with their friends, but most of their friends turned out to be quite sporty while it turned out my kids weren’t, so they ended up not being able to play with their friends. After a year or two they both refused to play another season, which made me feel sad at the time but now just feels like a relief!

We tried a few different sports for our son, but none of them stuck, which I think was probably for the best. Last shot was baseball, but when he planted his head on second base and started doing somersaults while the other team was at bat we decided to just let it go. Luckily we didn't take that as a sign to try gymnastics.

Yeah, so much of this is so spot- on. We started our son in k-1 soccer at age 5. At first we were just happy if his foot actually touched the ball a few times during a game but before we knew it we were disappointed if he wasn’t scoring the winning goal in overtime to win the league championship (he did exactly that n the 5th grade) Right now he is about to finish his junior year in high school, is a star on the wrestling and track teams and has already joined the Army National Guard as well. It worked out well for us but when we coached a youth soccer team (grade 4) we heard a lot of “I hate soccer, my mother m is making me do this” lol Keep up the good work fam!👍

There is the one more stage of when you child becomes an adult. Two weeks ago was my last attendance as a parent at a youth sports event. All us parents got together at the end and did the cheer that the players did at half time before re-taking the field and more than one of us had tears in our eyes. It has been fun... on to the next stage - no more parents of a youth athlete!

I did one year of hockey in grade five and quit because it was such a HUGE time comittment (I also had to get to most practices on my own), like there were practices twice a week and games every couple weeks even though it was just casual and not competitive, and I had no life but hockey and school - totally not worth it! There should be an option to play these games when you're young without them being so time intensive and high pressure.

As a one-time youth sports coach, #6 is the main question parents should ask their kids before engaging in or continuing in sports (or any activity, really). Very funny vid!😂

Lol! I watched others go through this and most of the kids dropped the sport when they graduated HS. I was the athlete in the family but it was back when there weren't a lot of organized sports for girls. I played rec softball all through HS then joined a church team in college because I loved it. My sons did not inherit the sport gene even though I gave them the opportunity to play soccer and baseball--neither were good or enjoyed it. So I only spent a few seasons at the sport fields.

My folks did that with my brother for a while. I not once during the whole thing got the impression they'd really asked him if he wanted to do it - more like they told him he was. It ended pretty quick when they realized how expensive it was though. XD

You haven't gotten to the high-school stage yet, where in order to even make the team, you have to go to camps and off season "non-mandatory" open gym.

"My self-worth is directly tied to my child's success" 😁

Years ago, Rick Reilly did a great essay about a neighbor that heard that women's lacrosse was the fastest growing NCAA sport. So, the neighbors spent thousands of dollars over the course of a few years for equipment, travel teams, camps, etc. What the neighbors didn't understand was that the NCAA has caps for scholarships for different sports. Women's lacrosse cap was $1,100. Sadly, youth sports has evolved from a place for kids to be social, goal oriented, be healthy, and have fun. It's not exists as an "investment" in the hopes your kid gets an athletic scholarship. What people don't realize is that there are so many more academic scholarships than athletic scholarships. I blame the high cost of college tuition for the craziness of youth sports.

Reminds me of ballet class when I was 8. Our Russian immigrant elderly male ballet teacher used to always yell at me: "You are PAPOOSE!" I assumed he was referring to my posture. At one point he told me and the other worst talented kid in the class that we really didn't have to take ballet if we didn't want to - and if that was the case we should tell our parents so they could stop taking us. And teaching kids ballet lessons was this guy's whole source of income. I must've been terrible! 😂

Team sports can teach kids a lot of valuable lessons, in addition to the skill of the sport. I have been there and done that with countless sports with all four of my kids. My favorite, though, was the ten years that we spent doing Tang Soo Do (karate) together. We all earned Black Belts (I was 46 when I got mine!) My husband and two boys are 2nd degree. It was a special time in our lives to go to the karate studio together. All four kids also play instruments and sing and we’ve experienced our share of music lessons, concerts, piano recitals, musicals and marching band performances at football games. All of these activities have created wonderful memories and have taught all of us so much. I can tell you, from first hand experience, though, that an Eagle Scout will get hired for a job faster than the one who went to college on a sports scholarship. My husband and boys are Eagle Scouts. Scouting has given them survival skills they will remember and use for the rest of their lives and it looks really good on résumés. Just something to think about.

I love the part when you realize that you forgot about if your kid wanted to do it.

As a soccer coach this is very accurate. 😂 I have seen all of these types of parents on the daily.

Me and my assistant coach from our daughters softball team call each other at least once a week during the season in pure bliss that our girls aren’t into it anymore after 7 crazy summers. I am one of those parents that drives by the ball fields during the season and smiles that I no longer have to deal with that level of stress anymore. It was fun for a bit but life is so much less stressful without it.

So happy we landed on Scouts & Circus school 🎉

Want to go back “just for fun stage” but the kids are just so good. Lol can totally relate.

Exactly. At 5 my daughter wanted to be a competitive cheerleader. I didn't even know that was a thing so she started at the Y for a rec team. Now, 10 years later, every spare moment and dollar is going to all star cheerleading and I wish I would have started her at 5 (mostly because the mini teams are so cute)

“Little Booger Picker Shooters” made me laugh way too loud. Seriously! If they’re not in comp sports by 3, they make you feel like you’re way behind! And you’re not but frick it’s insane.

“But you’re so good “ could totally relate to that 😅

Lol...u guys got it as usual. Fortunately my parents never pressed me to play sports..I just did them to get the hell out of the house and away from them!. Mom came to baseball games, I think my dad came to one of my boxing fights. None ever came to wrestling meets. So, I can't really relate to this video..but I've seen it with all my friends parents. Nuts!

I was forced to participate in a ton of piano competitions as a kid by my teacher and then shamed when I didn't place because I didn't start when I was 3 and I didn't have the time or luxury to practice for hours and hours and hours every single day. I started when I was 6 from the local SAHM who was just making a little extra pocket change babysitting me while I banged on the keys and learned to read notes because that's all we could afford. I never wanted to play piano seriously like that and the way I was treated made me so disillusioned I quit music altogether in my teens and I miss it 😢

I was mostly in music activities as a kid. My senior year I decided to try cross country and track, but I was mediocre at best and my CC season was cut short by a stress fracture in my foot. I guess my parents got off easy as far as the sports expenses go. Buying the running shoes was probably the most expensive part.

My daughter is starting year four of competitive gymnastics. I’m absolutely doing my best to focus on what she wants. I could care less if she can do a backhand spring, I care that she learns about to get back up if you fall, how to support her team, how to follow directions, and to give her confidence in her own athleticism. Nothing against my daughter, but I’m genuinely glad that she isn’t moving up the levels super fast, which is more and more time, travel, and money. I want to be in the “just fun” stage and never ever get to the “we forgot our kid.”

I am so grateful none of my nephews were ever pressured into doing sports if they didn't want to.

"Is... He special?!?", Lol that part always gets me.

I near begged my kid NOT to sport. He tried it, enjoyed it and has now asked to go back to robotics and DnD. Winwin!

I'm a scout parent and swim team mom for my son. My daughter was been wanting to join cub scouts since she was 3 years old, and she just turned 5. She is so excited to join cub scouts. My husband and I are really active in the BSA program for cub scouts and troop scouts.

You forgot to add that you blew the college tuition on travel sports for 10 years.... 😂. 6,000 x 10 = 60,000

Very awesome and accurate! Also you guys were our favorite on the Amazing Race

Don’t knock that color coded schedule! I need it.

My son is 14 and was never really into sports. He just decided that he likes baseball. We agreed to sign him up for the 1 week baseball camp this summer and if he still likes it then we will CONSIDER signing him up for baseball at school next year.

My nine year old (who can't catch, throw, or hit): Mom, can I play baseball? Me: .

My nephews started taking Ice Skating lessons and wanted to get into Hockey. In laws found out that getting an 8 year old and 10 year old into "beginner" hockey leagues just doesn't happen. Mot of the kids here have been playing since they were 4-5 years old. They finally found a practice league, but it takes up all of their weekends now.

2:42 explains sooooo much of "well-intentioned" parenting gone wrong and isn't talked about enough.

Child 3 (of 5), son 2 (of 2), and the only one that actually liked sports growing up. My dad was all over putting me in just about everything I’d play and had time for. He played college football and eventually so did I. He definitely loved telling coaches I was the best, but he was actually right most of the time. Except basketball, I was awful at basketball.

💯 from a hockey parent in MN! 😂

It's pretty insane how much money goes into sports leagues for kids these days. It's like your kid is so far behind, there's no place for him or her to play, once they hit their teens. Then, when they become an adult, they can play in the adult leagues. But by then, they may not be all that interested in sports. It wasn't much better in the 80s-90s. I tried out for basketball, but since I hadn't been playing since I was 8, and my skills were only so-so, there weren't many options for me, definitely not high school ball. So I played football because there's generally enough room for anybody (at least as a freshman). But since I hadn't been playing since I was 10, and my athleticism was almost non-existent, I only lasted a season. So it was cross-country. At least I finished my races. I've recently gotten into ice hockey. The sport is already expensive. But then you have travel teams and it gets crazy expensive. And the parents pay the price even though their kids aren't even good enough to get on a college team. Well, maybe ACHA teams where there are no scholarships for players.

Stage 7- They graduate and move on to college. Your weekends are free again, but your bored since you were so used to traveling around for games. That's where I'm at now, my kids are older and my weekends have been free to figure out what to do next. Sorry to make this whole thing sad, but do try to enjoy it even though it's a bit crazy busy at times.

Our local little league had practices 2x a week for 2 hours and games every Saturday from March until end of June. For T-ball. My son is 4.

Your video actually really ministered to me. I have never put my kids in team sports and struggle with mom guilt all the time. Makes me realize what we dodged.

I'll bet some people suddenly realized that they are one or more of these parents.

so accurate...so very very accurate.

Lol. It’s amazing as an adult to see what parents sacrificed for sports and the parents I see do it

OK look I'm feeling very called out right now! 😂 I miss those days though, baby will be 21 next week

Lol. My husband! He has to do soccer! Me: we tried soccer, he hated it. Him: but he’s so good! He can learn to like it!

This is so full of truth!!! Sad that some parents actually need to watch this… :(

What hit home for us was starting off innocently for our kids and then suddenly WE were involved in the leagues. My husband wound up as head of coaches and I wound up as director of sponsors....we went to work then devoted every minute to the leagues....my kids don't want anything to do with soccer when they started college...although they could have gone on scholarships....did our inability to stop volunteering have something to do with this? Oh..yeah...because nobody else would step in....we let it balance get away from us...cautionary tale.

Little Booger Picker Shooters League 😂😂😂😂

Oh my gosh, you guys nailed it!!

I am so grateful our kids were never into competitive anything. Dance and gymnastics are also like that too. They both did fencing for awhile and really enjoyed it.

Omg my parents with my swimming and my brother's lacrosse! I feel for them now, my kids are too young still but its definitely coming up soon. Love you guys!

The Little Booger Picker Shooters was Pele's first team at age 3. A 10 year old just starting out these days will never make it. 😂

This was simply THE. BEST. ❤

@1:45…..funny how they own all that recovery gear already

Haha, this is me and my son when it comes to music. 😂

I coached kids soccer when our daughters were kids. Our youngest started at goalie at 6. Her games were at the crack of dawn when the fields were wet with dew so the ball wouldn’t roll well. As a consequence, most scores were 2-1 or 1-0. I spent 50% of my time dealing with parent attitudes, 25% trying to get the moms off the fields when their kids if they fell, 15% waiting for kids to show up from their last activity and 10% coaching. Obviously I drank…

4 nights of softball a week and games on the weekend back in the day was enough for us with two girls. Can't imagine doing multiple sports.

Ugh, I wish we hit stage 6! Our son begged to be on the karate competition team for years, and now he's on it for the first time this year at 10 years old and loves it. My daughter's loved gymnastics since she was 3, and she's been telling us she wants to do gymnastics in college, and she's trying out for the team next weekend at 8 years old. I feel bad when she's frustrated about not being able to do certain skills, so I help her look up KZfaq videos to help with her technique and strength. She's a bit more passionate than my son. And it was supposed to be "just for fun" too. 😮‍💨 Maybe it's all just a phase??? I'm exhausted.

They nailed it, yet again! How do they do it?!

Hahaha this is the exact polar opposite into my one - and only! - attempt at a team sport as a kid. Hockey. In which i scored the winning goal - on the other teams net. I coouldnt figure out, for the life of me, why the other team was so happy and mine was so mad 😂

The way some parents go overboard trying to live their life vicariously through their kids because they were failures. My daughter's mom had her in cheer camp, she wasn't really into it but that's what the mom wanted for her life...

My daughters 12 has played rec soccer since she was 5. She decided she didn’t want to play anymore as she is going into middle school. Her friends play comp and I would ask her if she wanted to and thank god she was never interested but we would have figured it out if she was. Now we just have our 8 year old daughter in rec soccer and we will see where this goes 😂

I love your videos so much y’all are the sweetEst!!

Nailed it! I’m in stage 5 with my third boy. So hilarious.

This is sooooo spot on! 🤣

This is painfully accurate.

I love the (self) reflective take you have on this. I don't even have kids and I like watching you talking about your experience raising children. 1:47 Also Kim never sent back that sauna blanket! 😂