It definitely gets worse. The only times they are nice is when they fake being nice to get what they want.

in 3 words:" it gets worse"

I took care of my 89 yrs old mom and because I am the only child, I felt it is my duty to take care of her cause no one else will help. It was so toxic that I was getting sick physically as well as my soul. I normalized the abuse because I lived with it all my life. I always believed that I can heal their wounds by loving them unconditionally. In turn I hurt myself. Thank you for your information. I am finally waking up that these people have evil streaks in them and will not change.

If you feel more guilt or compassion for the aging narcissist, STOP! Give that compassion to yourself instead. You deserve it most! 💖

They change their ways. Their methods get more subtle and passive aggressive.

Maybe as the narc gets older they have burnt too many people and bridges and nobody is around for them to be abusive to.

I feel that ageing narcissists can’t hold their mask up for long periods and start to blurt out their intentions without realizing it. They expose themselves pretty quickly.

I think they get worst (angrier, more rages, etc) as they grow older

From my observation, as they age, they say things that make you believe they are different but when you pay attention, they just hide their secrets better. They may slow down a little because of ageing, but you see through the cracks if you pay attention. The patterns are always there.

I rarely disagree with your take. This time I do. Narcissist become much worse as they age. The skills and charm and beauty is gone. What is left is an empty, needy vessel full of rage and bitterness at the betrayal of their body and the betrayal in the mirror. They are horrible, dreadful to deal with and seem to desire getting their last shot in before they leave this world. Awful!

They get worse. They can play the “poor little meek old person” role and get what they want. Scary.

According to Dr. Ramani Durvasula, narcissists never change who they are.

I have see an increase in manipulative behavior as the narcissist ages. When they can no longer use their looks and charm to manipulate people they can become more controlling, argumentative, bossy and falsely caring.

I have had 3 Narc's in my lifetime. My older sister, my father and an X spouse. I can assure you they don't get better and more often get a lot worse with age. Best thing I have ever done is to go NO CONTACT about 20 years ago. If you have a middle aged Narc in your life, don't take any chances and get out while your still able.

My experience is that they get worse. Especially when their partner (supply) dies and the rest of the family refuses to fill that role (supply).

Usually, when the narcissist gets older the physical, mental, and resources to influence their actions diminished greatly. But this lack of interaction is replaced by loneliness, winning, blame, and projected guilt or assigning shame to others because of what is happening to them. As they grow older the rage increases and, unfortunately, nobody wants to deal with them because they have left behind a pathway of destruction.

They absolutely become more entrenched, and they get worse. They’ll be like this until they draw their last breath.

My dad has always been a grandiose narcissist and at age 77 he"s as narcissistic as ever,and he can still talk about anything as long as its about him

I’ve found that their mind games become more subtle and vicious. The rage at their core seems undiminished. Thank you for your insight, Dr. Grande 🙏

Continued damage? Yes. Narcissistic parents installed the buttons, so they know exactly how to push them.

My mother was in her 80's and referred to me as "It" because I wouldn't listen to her gossip about people and I distanced myself from her

I respect Dr Grande but my life experience with a few aging grandiose narcs proves otherwise. Narcs don't change. Be aware.

He’s 75 and lost sexual ability, by which he gauged his power over women. It’s led to depression and his insecurity and fear come out as bursts of anger. He does seem lonely, but refuses to allow anyone completely “in” He IS NOT less dangerous. He still tries to control, manipulate, lies, cheats in his superficial relationships. He’s taken to using his aging to becoming a victim! Because he drinks and at an age where he remembers less, it causes him to mix up who he lies to and what he said. Yes! He did refine his technique. You’re right. Thank you for all the enlightening information you’ve provided.

I follow forums pretty closely for children of narcissists and my observation is that when narcissists age they get so much worse to the point where many aging narcissists ostracize one of their children, or the victim goes "no contact". Scapegoats seem overwhelmingly to be left out of Wills, so they feel they have nothing to lose - they feel that if they stay, they will be more abused than ever, and then afterward be left out of the Will. There have been many discussions of the latter. Maybe an aging narcissistic parent will try to victimize by proxy, but so many of the narcissists' scapegoats abandon or are abandoned by narcissistic parents. There is no glue, no incentive, in a scapegoat role.

My Narc mother got worse, to the point that I have had to go no contact. Difficult decision when a parent is in their 80's. Feeling a lot of guilt but the damage to myself and my husband was too much. I had no choice if I wanted to remain sane. Have to add that the whole family is dysfunctional. Physically, emotionally abusive with me as scapegoat. Tried ignoring, distancing etc . Nothing stopped them but no contact. Wasn't a decision I made lightly.

I have an 80 yr old Narc and my sister and I live here to care for her... she is the ONLY one in the house that is NOT sick all the time. We are always sick and exhausted!

I was raised by a narcissist mother. I didn't figure it out until middle age. All of romantic partners were narcissists. I finally figured out that my attraction wires were all messed up. Thank you Dr Grande for these videos on narcissism. They are so helpful

My dad is 64 & it hasn't decreased at all. He is still awful & incredibly manipulative, abusive & equally as horrible as he has always been.

Didn't happen with my parents. My goodness, they got worse with age - it was astonishing. At age 50 - I went no contact because they completely unhinged from being able to shroud their abuse with a warped connection to reality - they just threw reality aside and all bets were off.

Worse! The manipulation and devaluation really do become extreme! I saw that in 2 Overt and 1 Covert Narc. They are, as you suggested Dr. Grande, more practiced, so they can "do more with less", and it's easy to underestimate them until they attack. Horrible creatures!

My covert sister is now 50 and she's gotten way worse. She goes off the rails a lot more frequently

public service announcement: they wont change (for the better)

a lot of narcissists want someone younger when they get older because they only care about looks!

My narcissist father managed to enforce the guilt induction over my mother in his last days. He died from cancer without considering that he could actually die, so there was no final words or final enlightnment for him. He was in his deathbed as narrowminded as he was in life, consistently transfering his emotional burdens to her.

Yes, my ex got sooo much worse and deadly dangerous.

Many NPD fall apart in old age, turn to alcohol or drugs to deal with the reality of their own mortality and faced with their own failures. Depression and social isolation becomes more and more common as they become bitter. May also end up homeless or in a mental hospital

Thank you Dr Grande. Your video confirms what I have read about people with those narcisstic traits...they do not change. Because they have burned so many Bridges, or have narcisstic children of their own, their circle of influence is very small....at best they become more clever devils in their delivery. I have witnessed this in an ex mother inlaw. Still manipulative and playing the victim...

My experience is that they get worse whith aging, especially with smearcampanges...

My dad was a vulnerable narcissist, I was his codependent all the way to the grave. I waited for that moment when he’d say he was sorry it never came. I was only free of him after seeing him completely helpless in his final days.

I couldn’t disagree more❗️ My father got much worse before he died in his early 80s and my husband gets worse every year he’s alive and he’s in his mid-50s.

Thank You So Very Much For Sharing Narcissists Get Worse With Age.They Continue There Same Patterns Manipulating Punishing Abusing It Just Gets Worse.

This is definitely a very interesting topic ! Thank you Dr. Grande. I was married to two of these Narc's. The first was a covert and the second was a grandiose type. Both types are always reaching out for new supply. They can be exceptionally nice to others while treating you like garbage on a personal level. Now I can understand why it becomes more difficult for them to find and influence new supply as they age. Lets face it, other older people get wise to their crap and don't care to deal with them. That leaves them with their spouse and children to try and manipulate. Most of their children don't want to deal with them either. That leaves their spouse. As Dr. Grande mentions they get more lonely as they age. that leaves them with only one source of supply. The spouse. Obviously they will double down on their only supply they have left. And if that supply passes on before they do,,,,, Well, eventually they end up in a nursing home. None of the surviving family visits them and the nursing home staff hates having to deal with them too !!

I've lost my whole family and when I had a family of my own, my mother and sister went after my children. They will do anything to punish you for living a life free from their manipulation.

I’m living with my 92 year old stepmom, who was a child during WW2, Germany. I understand the root of her narcissism, and know her mom was also a narcissist. Her jabs at me are now more like a dog with no teeth! She doesn’t have leverage now, she needs me. I’m the only one standing between living at home, or going to elder care. I’ve been here for just over a year, and have found my voice with her, I was so intimidated as a child. I speak my mind, am kind, but do not hold back. It is super hard, caregiving, but I have made some personal progress, and it’s not forever....

My brothers have not changed their tactics toward me in all their years. They have gotten worse because they no longer care if they impress others. My mother was mean spirited to the very end of her life. I have worked to stay away from my family for years and finally am able to stay away completely. People who have been acting badly all their lives are in a habit of it, they cannot just let go of what they have done all their lives. They also married narcissistic people who use the same meanness to affect others. I have decided to never go to the funerals of these people. Their spouses have acted all their lives that they don't like me, it makes no sense to go to be a support to someone who does not value my support. They have others they have gathered around them who they do like, let them be their comfort.

Interesting how so many people have this idea that when one ages they become more mellow, easier to deal with, and less aggressive self centered or manipulative, if they had some of these narcissistic personality traits when younger. Almost as if all elderly people are frail and nice and just want some company. I work with the elderly and so this video was very interesting on a personal level. I have worked with women who are absolutely verbally abusive and manipulative, and they do get worse as they get older. I noticed that the children of these elderly women rarely visit and when they do, they make sure to limit their visits to twice a week for about 15 minutes. Sad but it's probably their way of protecting themselves from verbal abuse. But then, maybe these children are also narcissistic, as they also seem to have no empathy for their parent whatsoever. Elderly women (generally speaking), seem to be able to hold grudges, be vindictive and act more self centered than men. They have more resentment towards their children, expecting their children to devote themselves to them. The elderly men seem to be more laid back and just lonely, whereas many of the elderly women become more bitter. This would be an interesting case study in itself.

My therapist was quick to remind me my narc ex-boss would get worse with time because society ignores middle-aged women, so she will be incurring near-constant narc injuries and will need *more* supply, not less.

This is happening to my narc father right now. He was diagnosed with dimentia last year and it has been absolutely bizarre watching the loud and aggressive control freak in my life morph into a weak and fragile man. As angry as I am at him, I can't help but feel sorry for him.

I feel I've been a victim of my husband's narcissism for 34 years. I'm not the gullible girl I once was. I think you're absolutely right about how I feel towards my husband. However, I now see his ways as a disability and do not expect him to change, and although it's supremely unpleasant, I'm not as affected as I used to be.

So glad you did a video on the aging narc! Glad I won’t be there to age with him!

From my personal experience, it's exactly how you describe it. My narcissist still tries to undermine me from time to time, it's really annoying. I'm no longer the main target. I've been the scapeagoat for decades, not a pleasant experience, which left me quite scarred. It took me a long time to recover and forgive. And lots of no contact, of course. She's obviously not interested im me and it's mutual, so I limit our contact to small talk at a minimum.

Thank you Dr Grande. Very interesting and I learned a lot. Frightening actually. My dad was a very dangerous narcissist. He got depressed as he aged. It appeared he had no one left to manipulate so he put a gun to his face and killed himself. I think he was in his 80’s. I had been discarded by both parents many years ago so I heard this thru my sister. Frankly I was relieved because he was very evil. His reign of manipulation and deceit came to an end.

Your clinical experience is right Dr. My mother went fron raging narc to covert manipulative narc. Oh she milked that poor little old.lady me. You are so knowledgabe. Thank you.

I loved the younger/older boxer analogy. Thanks as always Dr Grande 😊

They tend to get meaner, and are more aggressive, depending on their past successes, however the good news is that anyone above the age of 55 is not likely to be cognizant of being videotaped.

Practice makes perfect and they are increasingly dangerous as they age!!!!! Lock these sick freaks up this is one of the worst kind of human being WORST!!

Not taking any chances. Staying No Contact! I'm happy. single and loving it!

Thank you for doing videos on and including vulnerable narcissists. My mother is an aging narcissist, and while the manifestation of her narcissism has always been primarily vulnerable, she is now retreating fully into the vulnerable type. There is SOOOO much information available on the grandiose type and comparatively little on the primarily vulnerable type- not to mention how it manifests during different life stages. For a long time I was confused, because she was obviously abusive but didn’t fit the extroverted, grandiose type. It wasn’t until I stumbled on you speaking of the differences that the vulnerable narc manifests before her pathology clicked into place for me. And there is very little information out there about aging narcissism and how it changes and affects the senior narc. Thank you for your insights, and thank you for covering this type of narc that doesn’t get much “press”.

You described the aging parent in my life to a tee. Limiting exposure to her was vital to my mental health, although I felt called to come along side her to assist when she declined. Taking the parental reins at first was very hard as she was extremely strong willed and it was her way or the high way, most often. But little by little as I showed love, honesty, and dependability, she was able to let go of her control and let me lead. But I really need the Lord to give wisdom each and every day. Thanks for the validation, Dr. Grande. I think you know this type so very well! 😉

Please do more videos on geriatric populations! This was fascinating

From my experience, they tend to become more blatant and less subtle in their manipulating and verbal assaults especially when they become in charge and the wise elders or watchdogs have died off. Therefore, anyone who is around them for long periods of time may start to see the selfishness and deviousness. Not all senior citizens are wise and kind. Their tool box may be a bit rusty but tried and true so they love to keep using it to stab and maim. It is very painful, devastating, and confusing when you are the target.

Nope,they don't change,they get worse because the realization that they're aging makes them more bitter.

They stay exactly the same or get worse. I was my father's punching bag even in front of the nurses. The nurse pulled me aside and told me not to blame myself. It was him, not me. My father still triangulated and pitted my sister against me. He didn't have the strength anymore so he would get her to attack me.

I agree that they don’t get worse as they grow older. One of the difficulties that I’ve experienced when trying to highlight mean, narcissistic behaviours in the elderly is that people tend to dismiss the behaviours as being part of growing older, and try to get others to overlook the abuse being dished out. In other words old age becomes another mask behind which the now very skilled and experienced narcissist can hide. I have an elderly, narcissistic, female neighbour who lives across the road from me. I’ve known her for over 20 years, she’s in her seventies now, and her personality traits have not changed. She uses the aches and pains and reduced mobility to draw people in, playing on their empathy to get their support, and then she dumps her meanness on those trying to help her. She often gossips about other neighbours behind their backs, slagging them off and complaining that nobody helps her or supports her. This is not true as she receives a good deal of help and support from all of her neighbours. The only people who don’t offer any help or support are her children - a son and daughter who live nearby. In the past twenty off years I’ve only seen her daughter visit her mother about a half a dozen times. Her son, who lives 10 miles away, visits once a year. I’ve offered much help and support to her, mainly because she’s a widow (like myself) and I can see that she’s isolating herself by rejecting everything that is offered to her. I’ve had to stop offering anything because we’ve got ourselves stuck in a pattern of me offering something, she rejects the offer then she slags me off to other neighbours telling lies that she never sees or hears from me. There have been a number of disagreements between neighbours who have fallen for her games and they’ve all apologised one by one once they hear what I’ve been trying to do to help her. I now set clear boundaries with her and encourage her to lean on her children for help. I do the same with my neighbours. They don’t get worse as they get older, but nor do they improve (in my opinion). But I believe very strongly, that they use the vulnerability of old age as a mask to cover and excuse their narcissistic behaviours.

Wrong! And nearly every comment here conveys my opinion: THEY GET WORSE! I've spent the last several years reuniting/helping two different elderly female family members. I was so confused and angry I put myself in psychological evaluation boot camp on YT. Females in particular get much worse for these reasons: -automatic attention from their looks are gone-they replace that in desperately sad ways! (these two have converted their old-school hustling skills to CIA-like psychological operations!) -their work titles now gone--they create situations where they can boss someone around/shame them. The added effort it now takes to get their daily narc fix creates anger and frustraction. -Their usually smooth manipulation tactics aren't quite the same as ahlzimers and memory loss begin. So when they find a new "low self-esteem" victim they have to maximize this opportunity because most everyone they knew are now gone.

My dad got worse too. I called him the old king cos he thought he was. He died at 94 and still had me sat in my room sulking at 70.

This was a good summary, Dr Grande, thank you ... It's my father's birthday on Sunday; I was the second of his three children to be alienated ... The pain of not having the relationship you always wanted with a parent never goes away, but it does become less amplified; the pain of it, during our relative youth, turns to 'mere' sadness (and pity, for both/all of us) with understanding ... but that's the best one can hope for, ime ... :/

Interesting. I know a couple of older women who are with their narc husband because by that age, they have invested SO many years & if they left, they'd have to live off of $750 social security vs. the benefits they would get if they stick it out till he dies. You gotta eat.

From anecdotal experience, a grandiose narc can get way worse. I presume there was a lot going on with this person years ago, we just didnt have to deal with it. With a vulnerable, its just as bad, with a few new rare moments of this person trying, but snapping back to being really controlling & abusive at any even suspicion someone might want to make any decision. Im talking, if you want to cook your own lunch in a pan versus a toaster. I think it has to do with a loss of control, as you say-their charms work less, theyre less desirable workers, people are tired of dealing with them & have clued into what is actually going on. I dont think becoming more lonely has anything to do w/becoming less narcissistic. I think that Fuels it more. More desperate, feeling more victimized, needing to be More controlling & feeling woe is me without any insight as to why people stay away. If anything, hopefully with more time, non-narcs have learned more & have better boundaries & self-esteem. I recoil at the idea adult children are terrible for not wanting or be able to take care of aging parents, esp when theyre been so awful & ruined years of their life Just to suck them dry for their own pathetic ego needs. That is not how you treat people. You dont owe anything to people who are so abusive esp without any neurogenerative disease. It’s all kind of sad. But you’re not responsible for someone who is abusive esp if they dont have a neurogenerative disease. Its also like people forget all the things We miss out on, on Top of the abuse. We Want normal parents, we Want to be there for aging parents-thats the only reason we’ve stayed for so long: the tiny hope one day this person will just be normal, even for just a rare moment. We’re not the bad guys. It’s pretty heartbreaking on multiple fronts.

I really appreciate your channel and your work. Thank you!

The boxing analogy is excellent, not least because being on the receiving end of narcissistic abuse can feel like being in a ring and ending up on the ropes a lot of the time. I think they get more adept at manipulation, better at concealment, they are real wolves in sheep’s clothing at these later stages in their lives. They can sometimes use their new vulnerability as an extra tool to exploit those around them. A particular one I know is perfecting the kind old lady persona, but she is still the manipulative, attention seeking narcissist underneath. They can also use financial leverage, inheritance, to keep family members hooked. Thank you Dr Grande

EXCELLENT presentation! I like that you are talking about DIFFERENT topics on Narcissism (vs re-gurgitating the same stuff all the other experts are discussing (such as "dating, /"romantic relationships w/Narcs). But that's not the only encounters we have with these life-sucking people! My Narcissist situation is a wicked neighbor that does all these malicious antics with an agenda to try and get me to move(!)

I know one Narcissist with a lot of money and resources - got much worse as they aged and their cognition declined. Because they have money, they always have people to enable them. Another Narcissist I know is aging with very tight finances and not many acquaintances, and very few choices...so this person really struggles to act normal and to not drive people away.

I've seen this play out where the victim predeceased the covert narcissist; in his period of infirmity preceding his death he hoped for some expression and acts of compassion, caring, and concern from the narcissist, and hopefully some reciprocity and closure. Instead, the narcissist had already devalued and dehumanized him, and was already moving on to identify future sources of supply. He died an embittered man.

I’m dealing with an alcoholic 71 y/o malignant narcissist who is my mother. I am an ACES survivor of trauma and neglect she caused to me when she was 15 when she had me. I ran away at 16 and later joined the military to unlearn the NPD behaviors she refuses to deal with her own childhood traumas. After my Military I got my M.Ed, in Literacy to help and understand behaviors in learning (neuro/psychology and behaviors). I am an empath and I am also the family black sheep because I ran away at an early age. My only sibling sister is exactly like my Mom. Just like Dr. G’s video on this issue. Thank you Dr. G and Ramani for being experts and helping us navigate our lives! My mom hates I had an advanced degree and in the NARC form, she smeared me, attacked me for siding with the rehab ppl and in a rage, she took me off her POA two wks ago because I had an NCC (counseling certification) and understand the DSM, as I talked about concerns with her mental needs as she’s in rehab again for the 3 time this year. Cannot stop her drinking, driving and now she’s suicidal because We’re burnt out. I disagree when an aging narcissist has duel or multiple DSM issues such as substance and PTSD, it gets worse. I am a war veteran/soldier with PTSD and I will not stress my Lupus or mental health anymore. I must walk away, sadly. She will end up in an assisted living facility as she is verbally abusive and seriously antagonistically abusive/manipulative…to their end she will not validate her own pain nor the pain she’s still caused to my sister, me and , now my kids/ her grandkids. SADLY A TRULY NARCISSISTIC FIEND TO THE END! PRAYING FOR MY MOTHER AND HER SOUL!🙏🏽😔😢🧠💪🏾

My experience is they get worse. At least the abuse from my ex spouse increased precipitously around age 42-50 and is still getting worse.

Dr. Grande, narcissists do not "pass away" , they are divine. 😊 You should know by now. Just as so many other subscribers I like the boxer story a lot. All the n. persons in my life where at least in their early 30ties. I personally don't find it appropriate to attribute narcissim to a person that is in their teens and twenties, I can't see what is wrong with them. Young people want to grow and they are ambitious. What you tell us about their aging is absolutely true. Older N. are more refined, they have a greater interpersonal toolbox, some manipulate in a very sophisticated way, esp. when they are highly intelligent. Once they throw their "bombs", they hit their target with elegance and almost effortless. I admit that I'm impressed by that. If it was not highly destructive to others, I would state, that this is a kind of art. If your ego does not stand in your way that much as it does in your younger years, you are likely to be far more effective with your strategies, as a young person is. The worst person of my life finally discarded me as a friend imo for the reasons you mentioned here. He couldn't be on the top, since a 60 year old person is clearly not stronger than a person in her forties is. He indeed tried to give me a guilt trip and saw himself as a victim of mine. It is many years ago , but when I hear a person speak like he did, and if it is just one single word, I am still extremely triggered and instantly fully alert. That's his legacy. So thank you so much for this video.

Theygetwose especially if they are drinking and have a slow onset of dementia.

Extraordinary analysis ! You have depicted my aging mother(octogenarian)sucking everything out of my younger brother's life . My elder brother is a malignant narcissist,only abuses her(though he is still her golden child).

I really appreciate your videos. The different personality disorders are very well explained. And unlike other channels, they are supported by research. I have seen how many videos that simply demonize the narcissistic personality disorder. I prefer to understand it. Of course, I had to move away to protect myself. But to understand this personality disorder makes it possible to realize that people with it are suffering too. And it makes you aware rather than hate. To hate someone we have loved is also very painful.

No rest for the wicked, My narc always sleeps head faced at me, I build a pillow wall screew it I want sleep😂 they are demonds with out question. Knew somthing didnt add up found out about "narcissism " a couple months after she was pregnant😱😱 talk about a horror story, These videos help me alot thank you 🙏🏼🙏🏼

Corresponding videos on aging borderlines, histrionics and psychopaths would be interesting too, especially with points of comparison across the types. Thanks as always for sharing your insight.

Narcs might tone it down and do more covert acts as they age. Usually they become sweeter to the golden child and other underlings beneath the golden child. This is usually because of a financial gain and they gravitate towards the high earner. If filial piety is a cultural norm, guilt inducing woeful type of behaviour ensues. Beneath it, they’re exactly the same. They just become more cunning with dwindling age and financial status.

My narc and all of his siblings are all in their 60s and their mothers in her 80s. None of them have changed,all are still narcissists

Also how many family members died early from living with them.?? Cancer, autoimmune diseases, food allergies, lack of care. The stories you hear in support groups will break your heart.

Fascinating video again. Thank you Dr. Grande 😃🇳🇱

I've learned so much... Thank you!!!! For all the stress caused by a narcissist and with all this learning from months I'm a lot better. The funny thing is that all narcissists are the same. They all are programed with Windows Narcis... so predictable now haaha

Yes it was very conflicting. As the only female and older child, I was the chosen. But; God and its angels were looking after me when they sent people like you intoy life. Thank you Dr.

My parents became worse.

My husband is 53 and he is worse than ever. The raging is almost every day now. I'm starting to fear him.

Less narcissism in my aging Father is definitely NOT happening. He's going to be 85 in November, if he makes it, and is in bad health, has stopped talking to me just past Mother's day, refuses to speak to me still. In fact I would say his narcissism is at an all time high.

Dr. Grande, you are SPOT on! I appreciate your evaluation on what is my immediate situation. You have given me great courage to examine my relationship with open eyes and act accordingly! My gratitude and thankfulness to you sir!🤗

Thank you! I can recognize several of the things you describe, even though my mother was rather vulnerable than grandiose. Her last few years were really tough on me and my family (I was her only child). She died two years ago. I am now, slowly, recovering from all the anxiety, the guilt, and all sorts of other emotions.

This video left me feeling respectful. Thank you :)

Suffered this to the end with in law... she despised me for caring and hated her need for help. A bitter lady who believed the very worst of everyone and got so toxic i felt bleak daily caring for her needs...noone was real or decent or kind in her view . It really was a slow recovery..

LOVE your videos!! I've been the "victim" of 3 different narcissists back-to-back. I put victim in quotes because I've learned I'm not a victim and it's a choice to allow narcissists to do anything to you.

This is not my experience. My 78 year old narc dad has turned from grandiose to vulnerable narc. Paranoia and a lack of trust has increased, as has abuse and the attempt to control by using his Will while becoming more Scrooge like. Relationships are transactional and based on what he can get and pity ploys are emotionally exhausting and centred around his health and the need for me to cook and clean for him and supply attention and receive abuse. There is simultaneously even less regard for others to the point where I have needed to go non contact to protect myself from his false promises and emotional disregard, not that I ever obtained that anyway. He has become a thousand time worse and is more of a high conflict guilt inducing person than he ever was, deliberately intent on misunderstanding every single interaction. He will die alone in a nursing home abusing strangers who must care for him because he alienated and abused every single one of his adult children.

This was very upsetting to listen to as it was so descriptive of my situation. I guess I now realise that I never will hear those word of apology . Tough to hear but thank you for being so pragmatic.

Glad this guy is an actual psychologist, he knows what he’s talking about

As always, the best analysis and understanding of any topic you cover. Truly, thank you tremendously, you do understand.