I think it works particularly for a topic where people have their own thoughts to get out the way and then there's a direct response to the content.

But at the same time - the two windows open at once on my computer is a bit confusing - lol. Which would you rather we chatted in? There's maybe more obvious chronological markers in the chat window, but there's a lot to get through then when you begin the chat and it's already difficult to read for both content makers and viewers. Hmm. chin-stroking thoughtfulness/lovely people!!

This would have been great if it had actually notified me when the session started and not when it was over. This will be cool when they fix the glitches. Have a lovely day!!! AMB...Rose

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard -Love the idea of the “reminder” prior to a video. With the comments/chat, would there be 2 different sections (i.e. before & after)? Also, would they be in two different spots such as chat would be under a pinned comment yet regular comments would be in their normal location? That could get confusing, but maybe once we see how it works we might be able to make a better decision! 💜

I loved the pree warning i got all excited about getting home to watch it

That reminds me of Nanette by Hannah Gatsby. She talked about how some guy told her that medication for her depression would kill her creativity and he said that if Van Gough medicated we wouldn't have the sunflowers. Then she went on about how the medication he took for epilepsy (I think it was for epilepsy) has a component that makes you experience the color yellow more vividly, so we probably have the sunflowers BECAUSE he medicated.

Madison M. this is sort of a mixing and conflation of events. his possible illnesses aren’t exactly known since then diagnoses weren’t what they are today. any treatments he received aren’t all well documented either. it’s accepted that his doctor said he had a certain type of epilepsy, but he was given a medication that didn’t help that type but coincidentally did help bipolar disorder. there’s no certain way of knowing if he had bipolar disorder, but he did experience dramatic shifts in mood so it’s possible he did and that that treatment helped. he may have been treated with digoxin, aka foxglove, for epilepsy, which can cause some visual disturbances and light-altering effects (not hallucinations) but it isn’t known for sure.

@@ala4935 There's a portrait Van Gogh did of a psychiatrist and he's holding foxglove, which can make you experience the color yellow intensely. While we don't know for sure, it's very strongly believed that Van Gogh at least took foxglove, as well as receiving in-patient treatment for his mental health, which was the time I was talking about. The most prolific time in his career was during the time he received in-patient treatment. (Also, Madison was referencing something that Hannah Gadsby said. She wasn't claiming that she knew for a fact that it happened, only that Gadsby said it.)

I can confirm, as an art student with depression problems, depressed periods are when I can't create. Or, well, I can make a mess on a paper, but. When I feel normal human emotions, I am the most creative. That includes love, heartbreak and moarning, but with depression, it's like someone stole my driver and put me on autopilot, that doesn't get the basic jobs done so well. Totally a zombie. Not an artist or any other sort of professional human. And my teachers who have taught many students with mental health issues confirm too. Artists tend to be sensitive people, and that makes them both creative and more likely to get mental health problems. Those latter two can come together, but they aren't a cause and effect. On my first year, almost the first thing, we were introduced to a local artist that killed himself, and showcased how the community took bride of him after his death, and your mental illness doesn't make you better art, it just kills you. And people like a dead artist, because they are easy to take advantage of. So the point was, you should stay alive and fight for your right to feed yourself with your work.

I definitely use my past pain and trauma to influence my writing, but I can't write when I'm in the middle of a depressive episode. I just don't have the mental capacity for it.

Yeah, this is exactly what I was thinking. I know they come from a good place, but actually saying you know how depression feels like cos you've been sad is like one of the worst things you could say to someone with depression or bibolar. Along with "Smile and be positive" etc. Depression causes sooo many different symptons mentaly and physically. For me when my depressive episodes are at their peak(bibolar), I feel like I am a ghost, not really living nor dead, I feel constant agony, anxiety, anger, fear.. The agony gets so bad that I can feel it in my body, and like I would do anything to make it stop cos I can't take it nomore. I feel like I am not worthy of anything, just a human garbage, with no hope nor future, whom everybody despises. I mean, just to begin with. Never really feel sad.

I don't feel sad when I'm depressed, I just feel blank and UTTERLY unmotivated. Like, I won't bother to write a check to pay a bill, or make an appointment I really want to go to, because it is really hard to care.

I feel ike that, plus anxiety

This was why it took me so long to understand what was wrong with my mental health. I knew something had changed in the last few years, I wasn't who I used to be and I wasn't functioning the way I used to, but I didn't feel sad or scared, so I assumed it couldn't possibly be depression or anxiety. Day to days I felt passively content just as I always had. I just felt exhausted and like my brain was on overdrive to keep up with everything I needed to remember. I'd start feeling less motivated like, "I want to turn off the telly and take a nap now please" kinda way, and I also felt like - I'll use Jessica's box and shelve metaphor, I felt like I had a great system that worked for processing trauma, but I ran out of shelves for my boxes and so in the back of my mind it was cluttered, none of that clutter actually mattered, like Jessica says, if I opened a box I'd look inside and think "pffft" and want to throw it away like I used to.... But I can't find the bin anymore! that thought just sits there and won't go away even though you deep down don't care about what's in that thought box. It's like my subconscious says "we need to clean up" and my conscious inner monologue says "duh, but how? I'm trying, shut up, just let me focus on the now" and I argue back and forward in my mind. I never thought that was an anxiety disorder, I thought anxiety was that sense of "have I left the oven on?" that never goes away, or being frozen with fear or predisposed to panic attacks, because that's how most awareness campaigns talk about it. I've only just started CBT for it, prior to that I was in talk therapy for depression (because I felt unmotivated and tired all the time) and it made my emotional state so much worse because it was making me overthink things and try to work out why the thought boxes wouldn't go away, instead of learning to accept and cope. But I'm still not sure it's the best management plan, I think I'd benefit from multiple therapy types or would at least like to try, but this is the only one available to me under the current healthcare system, which as the women in the video discus, is a huge problem for people trying to manage their symptoms and conditions effectively.

True! The description of beeing sad is a very bad one and the reason why so many people think someone who is depressed is just whiny. It's true that one clearly isn't happy in a state of depression but that doesn't mean one is sad. The word itself describes it very good - the person is depressed (= reduced), all moods are depressed and finally it can affect the whole body and depress the strength of a person. Not talking about not beeing able to lift something heavy but to move the own body in the first place because of pure physical exhaustion, e.g. not beeing able to work, talk, walk, stand up or just to brush the hair seems like a huuuuge, unsolvable task and takes 2 hours to do, if it get's done. Depending on how long it's going on and on many individual facts, it can happen that sadness is the last or the strongest emotion that is still there or the only one possible for the person. And if the person is sad mostly the depression itself is the reason for one to feel bad or to get sad, because it's very hard when everything is held down and reduced and it affects your social skills etc. it's actually quite rare that it's the other way around. But exactly that is what most people think, because they get told depression is sadness or that it feels like sadness and some even think if a person is sad or mourns "too long" the person will get a depression. Both is bulls**, but they'll tell you that they know how you feel and what to do, to be happy again etc. Honestly, that's really not helpful at all, the only emotions that this causes are anger or despair (true for me and for many depressed people I know). I have chronical depression for over 15 years now and I'm working in the health sector and therefore I know many people with mental health problems and I know their story and how they feel. Personally I'm usually not sad in a depression but when it's really bad, it hurts and I'm in pain. Burning or stinging pain in my chest that won't stop (the body has just one possibility too construct and cause pain, it's the same neurotransmitter and the pain is as real as every other pain one can have). That obviously can make me feel sad, but usually I'm feeling helpless and hopeless, if I feel emotions at all. I've a personality disorder that can also stop my emotions but this does still feel like beeing empty (I know that sounds strange), while in a depression even that feeling isn't there.

My ocd, since I was very young, had always been with even numbers. If I "encountered" odd numbers I would add or multiply in some way to make it even. It would freak me out if could not come up with an even conclusion. I have gotten better about it as I've gotten older but with that came other obsessions such as washing my hands 2 to 3 times in one sessions or if I do not have my cup of coffee in the morning I am set up for failure the rest of the day. It's not like I'm dependent on that extra kick coffee gives people but I mentally need it because that is how I need to start my day. That's my foundation for my day. It's part of my routine.

That is a brilliant description of bipolar.

I wrote a piece about comparing the whinnie the Poo characters

My mom was bipolar and these where her two faves, which became mine too as a kid.

Could not agree more! ❤❤❤

yes! I'm also quite frustrated and dissapointed mostly about her saying that, as well as about depression described as feeling sad and everyone can relate to it. There where a few things that bothered me. They should have researched the topics at least a bit for a video with this title and length, instead of just talking their mind in a way people will think these are facts and explanations and give even more wrong informations about the topic. At the same time saying that wrong assumptions and prejustice are a big problem for affected people but causing some.

Thank you for bringing this up! I wanted to comment on this as well. Psychosomatic illness is not "where you think something and then your body makes it happen", it's just as real as other illnesses. I have a friend who has intense physical pain caused by trauma (i.e. psychosomatic) and they're definitely not "faking it" or imagining it just because their pain doesn't have a *physical* cause. Their pain is just as real as other pain.

I'd just like to add as someone with health anxiety (formerly known as hypochondria) I have psychosomatic symptoms all the time and they are not self inflicted. There is such a stigma around health anxiety. I agree with everything else though. :)

There are some doctors that could do with reading this comment!

I don't think Rowan meant it like that, even if it might have come across in this manner. I think it's more from the person who is a friend of someone with depression or anxiety. That in this persons mind they feel they can understand the illness to an extend and thus talking about it with the ill friend is a bit easier than it would be with personality disorders, shizophrenia, etc. But of course you are right, just feeling sad, but more amplified, doesn't encompass the true experience of what depression is like and there needs to be more education about that.

@@AndroidInHumansClothing I agree, I don't think she meant it like that at all. I just wanted to validate the experience of severe anxiety and depression for myself and others that might have felt dismissed. Talking about mental health is a tricky subject and a slightly flawed attempt is still so much better than not saying anything at all! I'm really grateful for Jessica and Rowan taking the time to talk about their experiences with it. There is so much work that needs to be done with raising awareness and reducing stigma for all mental illnesses and I'm excited to see these lovely ladies doing just that!

@littlelunanova : Thank you so much for putting your thoughts out here so eloquently! ♡ This is such an important point! And one I felt should be adressed here - due to personal experiences with my clinical depression and other mental health issues I'm fighting/dealing/living with for more then 20 years - but I couldn't find the words. So thank you! :-)

Hey! Thanks for your comment - as someone who has severe anxiety and depression myself I didn't mean that it was the same feeling at all, but like @androidinhumansclothing said, that the concept of what it feels like could be potentially more understandable than issues like psychosis and hallucinations etc that most people don't necessarily have ANY experience comparable to, if that makes sense? It doesn't dismiss depression or anxiety to say that some of the ways of explaining it can have a basis in emotions and experiences that mentally healthy people also have.

littlelunanova well, everyone does have depression and anxiety at some point in their lives. those are just symptoms. major depressive disorder and generalized or social anxiety disorder are diagnosable mental illnesses.

Same! I've had major depressive disorder ever since I was a child and recently I've been struggling with my identity. I can't tell if I react the way I do because of my depression or If it's because it's who I am.

I'm trying to wait until after COVID vaccines are out and most people have the vaccines to get assessed to see if I have ADHD; I have a lot of similarities in behavior and shit, genetic risk factors that increase my likelihood of having it, and yeah, there's a lot of things pointing to "you might have this", so I want to get assessed to see for sure if I have it or something else or what. Hnng I don't like having to wait, though. XD

@@TheKarret I get you, waiting and being left not knowing is the worst. It's like you have the word to tell people and yourself within an arm's reach, but you can't quite use it yet for fear of being wrong and getting judged.

@@JuMixBoox Lol exactly.

Yep same with being autistic and my adhd.

Jane Justice Doe I really hope your Sinuplasty goes well! That all really sucks.

@@Rhelanae thank you very much! I'm excited to have use of my nose again! Lol

Similarly, when you've been diagnosed with a mental illness, especially anxiety and depression, everything that's wrong with you is put down to that. It becomes almost impossible to get further investigations ordered, compounded by the fact you have anxiety and probably struggle with conflict (like fighting to get referrals etc.) HOWEVER, this does have some merit as the exhaustion from mental illness can make you more susceptible to illness like colds, but still i've heard of doctors missing kidney and liver dysfunction by putting the symptoms done to anxiety.

@@jasmineling5517 Right! I've also been diagnosed with anxiety and depression but I'm usually a bit hesitant to talk about because I've had so many doctors or other people think its just "in my head". It's frustrating. My anxiety and depression can get worse when my health is very bad, but that doesn't mean it's the cause.

@@JusticeAnimeGeek also, like, i've been mentally ill for a long time. I know what my symptoms are, what 'normal' is in terms of my own mental illness, so please believe me when I say i am experiencing something outside of that!

That's so interesting! goodness!

Yes, I live in West Africa (tropics) and in the dry season when sunlight is blocked by atmospheric particles, I get quite down. But the worst was when I was living in the UK and it got dark at 3pm.

I’ve seen people whose SAD is kind of in reverse, they feel bad in the hot sunny months and okay in the colder months

I live in Alaska and I find that I might have the opposite? I feel quite sluggish and useless during the daylight hours and when the temps are above 75f so summers are bad on me. I love the winters here though. I’m more me during that time. I’m more active, i work better, think better, feel better when it’s dark and cooler. I even found a great job that I work nights that way I’m at my most productive.

Spiffleh SAD is not just about light. i get more depressed in the summer with longer, brighter days. sunlight can be one factor but not the only one.

woo hoo! I think the Premier video mode is meant to help the notification button work in some way... 🤷‍♀️

I did not get a notice for it until it had been over for forty minutes

Check out vitamin d3 supplements 5000-10000 iu , magnesium 400-500 mg, and omega 3 and check with you doctor if that would be ok for you plus there are Now ordinary lamps which you can buy in specialité stores which can be used in ordinary sockets where you can have them as ” morning/ sun light or as soft light - bloody excellent !

Thank you for the feedback! Definitely thinking it will be a great thing to use for livestreams :)

Family /Systemic therapy does exist 😊 Maybe you can find some info about that on internet, it might be easily accessible in your country

She also never talked to me again really aside from making the plans she wasn’t planning to keep.

Katrine Basso check out voxra which affects dopamin deppression which is way common with autism rather than seretonin ( you can have both ) (usa wellbutrin not a copy) And buspiron for anxiety and just generelly autism but both in Very low dosages ( for me voxra was 150 mg and buspiron 2,5 mg X3 a to 5mgx3 / day during 2 weeks before period in My case and When I say check up on I mean read up on it and if you Think it would do something good for you discuss it with your doctor as many doctors are unaware that We often get dopamine dependent deppression rather than ” ordinary” for me it took a pain specialist to Work it out ;) the combo for me was great because it turned down the volume and gave me more energy to cope Another tip muscicians earpluggs to get the volume around to a more managable level thus helping the energy and cooping with people level ( didnt understand how others saw the world until got those earpluggs and photocromatic sunglasses with antireflex and suddenly every noise and light didnt hurt - just Wow!) still more sensitive than most but ......Phew!

And oh buspiron is also really good for ocd , might also want to read up on n- acetylcysteine and the research for ocd as that might also help and its a cheap supplement but again check with your doctor so all your meds Work together.

Thank you Anna for your help, I forget to put that I have anti-epilepsy medication (epilepsy under control) and I am very restricted about what medication I can take with. It was quite a struggle to get prescribed anti depression and pain medication. I am unable to use earplugs as my ears perspire due to skin problems and can only use on the ear or over the headphones. Thank you for the tip about photocramatic sunglasses with antireflex.

My depression gets a lot worse in summer for me as well. The heat and going to bed when its still light outside are the biggest problems for me.

yeah same, i'm consistently more depressed in summer. heat makes me feel sluggish, i cant spend as much time outside/go on walks, hydration is harder in summer...all issues that worsen my depression/ affect my ability to carry out my coping mechanisms :/

Not depression, but my DP/DR (disassociative disorder) gets waaay worse in summer because of the heat. Makes me want to move to a colder country!

@@papongpapong1047 the sad part is i literally lived in finland up until a few weeks ago (it does help, compared to summers ive been in hotter places)

For me I know that summer is isolating which makes my depression worse, if it’s too hot I’m far too lethargic to make it outside to see me friends, and I have no reason too bc I’m not in college. This summer I tried my best to Make an effort to change that and although I had a couple bad weeks I was better overall. But winters almost here so big up SAD :’(

Just wanted to say that there's nothing wrong with self diagnosing - doctors don't do anything other than check a list of symptoms to arrive at a diagnosis, either. Especially if the symptoms aren't physical and can therefore really only be assessed by yourself anyway, you are not doing anything wrong by coming to the conclusion that a certain diagnosis might fit you. It's certainly not taking away attention from the "real issue". I hope you'll find good ways to cope with your intrusive thoughts and I hope you can ignore people telling you to just get over it!