me: wants to go on t, get top surgery, and get bottom surgery also me: hmmmMMMMMM HOW AM I SURE THAT I AM TRANS

SHE LOOKIN LIKE EDNA MODE. she is my fave character tho, and thank you for this information. It really helped.

The question of "If you woke up tomorrow, what would you want to be" was really effective for me.

I'm left feeling conflicted. I'm not disgusted by my genitalia, and feel no need to alter it. But almost every other single aspect of life I wish near daily was more traditionally feminine. Body shape, mode of dress, and just so much more. One halloween I used it as an excuse to dress hyper feminine and it was one of the best days in my life. I'm not sure if I'm trans, but I've known for over 13 years now that if I could snap my fingers and have been born a woman I would. But with how much it would cost and the work it would take I don't think I'll ever let it go beyond fantasiful thinking.

I knew I was trans when I was 7 but I thought every little girl wanted to be a boy so I kind of just forgot about it until I hit puberty and that's when it all went to hell

u be lookin like that short person from the incredibles

This video actually made me more secure in my non-binary identity. When you asked if I want to be a woman or want to be a man, my brain answered, "Neither. I want to be something else." Thank you for putting good content out into the world to help me and anyone else who can't make sense of their gender.

I was assigned female at birth. I spent my whole childhood being part of "the boys" and every time that I realized my body wasn't like theirs I got angry. Growing up I tried very hard being feminine: I thought that would make me feel like other girls, but I always felt more uncomfortable. Now every time that I feel masculine I love myself, but I'm scared that it might be a phase. Plus I don't see myself as a boy because of my female body.

I go back and forth between wanting to be a woman and wanting to feel like a woman.

i was born a female and i’ve felt/knew i was female all my life. that key question: “would you wake up as the opposite sex” really helped. i’ve been questioning my gender identity for almost 3 months now and i KNOW i wouldn’t want to wake up as the opposite sex. thank you.

I think the biggest sign was when I was 9 and I was hell bent on being a tomboy. I remember walking into class with the rest of the boys and they were bragging about how all the boys made it first and one of the girls pointed out I was there first. And the boys just looked at her weird and said "but she's not a girl, she's a tomboy" and that made me so unbelievably happy. Whoopsies.

It took me a long time to realize that I identify as an effeminate man(ftm). I don't have any issues with feeling effeminate, but I don't feel right being in a female body. It took me at least two or three years to sort through that nuance

I'm 17. I've been wrestling with this since I was 13/14. I feel like sometimes if I don't transition to become a man I will explode, but other times these feelings aren't nearly as intense. I only realised I was experiencing gender dysphoria at about 13/14, but I know I felt it before that. At about 12 I developed bad eating habits because I wanted to slim down to make my chest and hips smaller, when I was 8 I refused to wear summer dresses to school, when I was 7 I remember trying to pee standing up and being disappointed that I couldn't. Therefore, surely I MUST be trans, yet I have a constant feeling of doubt that lingers over me. I cant live my life female - even the word woman makes me feel odd. So WHY do I constantly doubt myself?? :(( Thank you for the video!!

That very last point about trusting yourself is the hardest part for me. I feel like I've spent so many years lying to myself that I really struggle to know what voices are speaking the truth.

Yikes, honestly I'm kinda confused. When I was younger, (4-10) I did feel uncomfortable about gender assigned stuff like bathrooms, roles and all that jazz, and also wishing to be a girl... and I definitely would want to just wake up as a girl... and writing this comment I was expecting my brain to make a counter argument but that didn't turn out so ˢʰᶦᵗ ᶦ ᵐᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵇᵉ ᵗʳᵃⁿˢ

The distinction between "feel like" and "be" finally made me realize that my gender expression is different than my gender identity. I've been trans masc for five years but I've felt like it's a perfomance or a cage. I still have gender dysphoria and don't feel confident identifying as nonbinary so I've been suck for a long time. Today I finally realized I want to "be" a man and "feel" queer, or like a gender non-conforming man. I feel silly something so simple has been plaguing me all this time but I'm so glad to figure this out.

At an early age, I remember being upset about getting pregnant and giving birth. I talked to mother about how I was feeling. I don't remember the words she used, but I know that I must have been told that I am a boy and not to worry about it. This was my first indication that I was a girl. With the onset of puberty, the feelings grew stronger, but I kept them to myself. It took 49 years for me to finally accept that I am a trans woman, and it feels so much better. I'm much happier. Another great and helpful video! Thank you!

Thank you so much for this. I've identified as female, then genderfluid, then non binary. But now, this video has helped em come to terms with how uncomfy I am being those things. I'm now pretty sure I'm a trans Male, thank you so much-

I realized I was trans when I felt complete and real identifying as a woman. All my life I've felt fake like I was pretending to be someone to other people, but deep down I knew that person I presented wasn't real. I felt like I was missing something, and didn't know what. And after many years of suffering it finally clicked when I started identifying as a woman I finally felt complete, I found what was missing and truly say I know who I am and it feels real

when I was little I thought my mom was secretly evil and changed my body to that of a girl lol

My earliest memory of my gender dysphoria was when I was in kindergarten and I wanted to be in dance class but my mom said that was only for girls. Through school almost all of my closest friends were girls. A trend that continues to this day as all my closest friends are women. In school I hop-scotched, jumped rope and played Jack's all the time. In high school I'd have lunch with my girlfriends or hang out with them at the lockers. It hurt when they would talk about relationships and boyfriends because I would be excluded from those conversations. There's never been a doubt in my mind as to my gender. As a kid I used to pray all the time God would change me into a girl. Now I'm in my late middle age and I'm still praying only now I pray I'll have the funds for surgery. I've been on hormones for almost 17 years but waited to transition publicly until my child was grown. Well that time has come and so now comes the next and hopefully final step if I can afford it. Plus coming out to friends and family still has to be done and im not looking forward to that to be honest. Thanks for these great and informative videos.

I'm one of the exceptions to having any knowledge I was MtF trans from my youth and I'd like to share a small bit of my perspective just in case anyone is struggling like I did not having childhood memories of wanting to be female. I'm in my mid 30's and I only found out that I was female in my early 30's. I was truly blindsided by it, unlike most people. I was raised in a very conservative household with blatantly homophobic/transphobic relatives and taught that I had to be tough and follow all these old values like always be polite to people, never hit a woman, don't curse in front of women, don't cry in front of people, and my goal should be to work hard for a better life so I can have a wife and kids some day. The only real sign that sticks out to me from my past to this day is my envy of women. I've always been obsessed with supermodels/pornstars ever since I was little. I enjoyed starring at gorgeous women very much on TV in Miss America beauty pagents and that was about the only thing that was encouraged by my grandparents and parents because in their views men were supposed to be attracted to pretty women. My attraction was far more than just sexual though. It was an obsession to what I consider to be hyper feminity. I was jealous in high school of how girls got to be the ones to get hit on and how I was expected to hit on them instead of them hit on me. I hated how no matter how much I weight lifted or improved my looks (and I was very good looking trust me) I felt like it gained me nothing socially, whereas girls just naturally went through puberty and were magically magnets of attraction because of their amazingly adorable proportions, curves, and soft skin. I was always angry that women got to violate all these rules that men were expected to follow (in my old narrow minded view of the world) such as expression emotion freely, crying whenever they feel like it, and asking for help instead of trying to do things yourself, etc. When I was forced to sign up for the draft I thought how unfair is this? I would have to fight if we had a war because I was born with a penis, whereas they get to stay home. I don't want to fight people. I don't want to go to war. I'd much rather stay here and raise children rather than do that. Finally after many failed relationship attempts in my 20's (due to some of them being abusive relationships, and some of them just leading to me being unhappy and having to break up because something just didn't feel right) I was back to the drawing board for the dating pool. I tried going online and being the playboy I was in my 20's, which meant pulling women and having sexual interactions with them (which always left me feeling empty inside, yes I was a major fuckboi). For the first time after learning, growing, being sensitive raising step children, etc. I realized I didn't want to do the chase anymore. I couldn't stand all the attention women got in online environments where I felt like I had to beg and plead for it like I was gasping for air. So I said, okay, why don't I try being a woman avatar then? So I did. At first, it was a little weird for me because of the intense internalized homophobia from my past. Then it turned into almost an addiction. I started off in IMVU through text and then decided I want to try VRChat in late 2019. Only I had a problem, VRChat was voice only and I wanted to be taken seriously as a woman because I was addicted to the attention I was recieving for it. So in a matter of months, I trained my voice to be feminine all by myself. It was rough at first because many people questioned my gender identity over and over and over again as my voice was not passable. It hurt every time the question came up. A few people, I even got aggressive on because of it, until one day someone said "Easy! I didn't actually think you were male! I just ask every female that in this game". That's when it struck me that I was giving myself away from how angry I got from being misgendered, and that my voice training was successful and I was more passable than I thought. I met many MtF trans women in VRChat that became my best friends. None of their stories made sense to me because my experience was nothing like theirs. In fact, because of my internalized homophobia and transphobia I still didn't want to let go of presenting as male, even though I was doing so for 14 hours a day playing VRChat enjoying looking in the mirror and seeing my reflection as female. It was sometime around early Jan 2020 when I got my headset, my voice was passable, and I could see a 3D version of myself in VR with full body tracking that it really clicked for me. It hit me like a panic. I finally realized I was MtF transgender. The thoughts in my head were not "YES! I have finally found my identity!". No. The thoughts were more like "Fuck, fuck fuck fuck fuck! This is not good! Now I'm going to be outcast by society, hated, thought of as a freak, and this is going to be a terrible and expensive endevor to be passable in real life if anyone is ever to like me again". The contrast though between me seeing myself as a hot young anime girl in VR, then seeing myself with masculine features in real life when I would go to the bathroom and have to look in the mirror was killing me though. I dealt with it through drinking copious and ridiculous amounts of alcohol and spending almost all my free time in VR. Every time I looked in the mirror I wanted to break it. I wanted to put bags over it so I didn't have to look at myself anymore. My sense of self attached to the cute, girly, hyper feminine I wanted to be and my conviction in wanting to transition into it was an unstoppable force. I'm an elitist by nature. When I want something I will kill to get it. So when I say I finally realized it was a matter of life or death for me to transition, I mean it because if I had tried to fight it I think I would have become a suicide statistic. Fastforward to today, I am over the hill. I'm out everywhere, at my job, with everyone I know. I've been doing hormones now for over a year and I couldn't feel better about myself. I have a boyfriend and we met in real life and it couldn't have gone better. My friends truly envy my beauty, but I still have dysphoria about my face and other things. Long story short though is that I think my case is special in that I didn't know I was trans until older and the rapid change from transphobic/homophobic to self-acceptance and love has been quite a different narrative than ones my friends have told me (in some respects).

I feel like a "woman" but I don't want to be one nor do I want to be a man. I am gender nonbinary when it comes to "being" but I want to be seen as a woman by the world. In the end how those around us view us is based on how we are perceived and I definitely do not want to be perceived as a man. I want to be a mother one day, motherhood is something I always related to and I know that I want to be seen as a mother, not a father or "gender nonbinary" parent. I don't know if that makes sense to others, but it does to me.

This really helped me. I realized that I don’t want to Be a woman. I want to Feel like a woman.

Love the video. I'm definitely trans. Started age 5 always wanted to be a girl/ woman. I have woken up many times from sleep reciting "i need to be a woman several times. See the therapist Tuesday and hope to start HRT soon. Thanks again DR. Z Hugs Jennifer

Whenever I am in denial I come back to this video to remind myself exactly who I am. 🤍🤍

Me: Wants to change pronouns, change my name, look like a guy and get top surgery Also me: What if I’m not trans??

I knew when I was so young, I’m not sure how old I was. I tried to change my name to Alexis, but my mother said I couldn’t because I wasn’t a girl. I am now 41, just came out to my family, and just starting transitioning. The part that really struck a chord with me was when you said, if you could wake up tomorrow and choose, what gender would you be. I have always fantasized waking up and magically being in my female body!

It was a small wooden theater with a stage and a few rows of wooden chairs at a church. I was almost 3 years old. I was standing in the aisle looking across the chairs to the opposite aisle. There were 3 little girls there dressed so pretty, their mothers showering them with love and affection and I remember exactly what I thought, “Gee, I wish I could have that but I'm a boy so I can't.”

I have always wanted to be a Female. For as long as I can remember. I feel like I'm transgender. The struggle goes on.

I know that everyday I wake up wanting to Be a woman and feel like a woman. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror unless I hide my lower region and hide my chest. I’m excited to start my transition as a young woman!

My feelings about my gender changed when I was in my forties. Until then I was a cis man.

It’s interesting that you refer to being 4 years old when gender becomes something we are aware of. That brought up a specific memory of being angry at my photograph being taken in girls clothing and thinking it was to be mean to me and I was very angry. Why was I being put in those clothes? A dress? 😡 I thought it was a cruel joke and not funny. But I couldn’t speak yet. I asked myself the question you posed. It’s both. Before it was “be.” But now that I have transitioned, the wanting to “feel” like a man is something that has to do with feeling like I’m “man enough.” So it’s more about feeling secure about my masculinity. Maybe that’s a different thing. Thank you again Dr. Z for another enlightening video. I learn something from every episode. You are a blessing! Truly! 🙏 ❤️

I've always thought I was transgender FTM from when I first heard about it, and have identified as such for at least 3-4 years now. What confuses me is that I don't really want male genitalia and feel disgusted when thinking about having it. I want to be perceived as a guy but would feel uncomfortable having that part. I feel good when people refer to me as male and I feel good when I can cover my chest, but I don't feel very uncomfortable with the way my bottom area is now. This is very confusing for me since I have identified.this way for a long time and love to be referred to as male but sometimes want to be feminine and don't mind that one part of my body.

Really interesting video! I think I like to feel masculine, but I don't want to BE either male or female. I feel a lot of doubts about being trans because of how cloudy and difficult to pinpoint my gender is, although for the time being I'm identifying as non-binary. What I do know, is that I absolutely don't want to be female. I have an odd relationship with gender. Even as a child (6ish), I always felt different to other girls, I liked having shorter hair and wearing boys clothes, but I also remember wearing dresses and not actively hating it. As I grew older, I became more and more distressed about my female organs, even feeling nauseous when thinking about things like pregnancy. I loved cross-dressing and reading stories where women dressed as men. I think, while I enjoy being perceived as masculine or male, I just don't want to BE female.

I love her accent and pronounceacion of words

I just found your video and all I can say is thank you so much! I'm a 24 years old gay guy and I have been questioning my gender identity for quite some time. I visited two gender specialists, but I was even more confused after that, because they were not giving me any good answers to my questions I guess. This video actually helped me to realize that I'm not a transgender person and it's okay sometimes to feel a bit more "female" and sometimes a bit more "male", and it has nothing to do with the gender I was assigned at birth.

I've struggled with my gender for a couple years now, recently I've been questioning constantly. Sometimes I'm on the verge of tears because of my feminine parts but sometimes I don't feel that way, sometimes I just feel slight uncomfort seeing those parts of my body. I imagine myself as a male and I look happier but I don't know If I'm just trying to make myself believe I'm transgender or if I really do want to be a man. Sometimes I try to tell myself that I'm just a big tomboy and that I'd regret doing anything, I don't know if this is true or I'm afraid of change because of how big it'd be. I hate how I feel, constantly confused and sad but I don't know how to fix it.

i didn't know i was watching the incredibles

My earliest memory of knowing something was up was when I was 4, but my grandfather told me that when I was leaving for my first day of school a year prior, he told me the spice girls hat I was wearing was for girls. Apparently, I turned towards him while boarding the bus and said "granddad, I am a girl" and then just went to school 😅

When I was a little girl I was very in touch with my feminine side, I loved princesses and dresses, but their was a duality between my expression and my body. I really wanted to cut my hair, and many times tried peeing standing up, and got really frustrated when my family members told me to be more feminine, act like a lady, or that I had to wear a shirt outside. I didn't love being referred to feminine or masculine. These were very minor signs that were very internal and personal. And when I started puberty and started budding that through my dysphoria in the loop, and I started compensating by dressing masculine and cutting my hair. Turns out I was just non-binary. Moral of the story: there is no one way to be trans

I remember getting extremely sad when I realized that I would eventually develop breast and get a period while others were excited

Dr Z, this post is very thought provoking - and has exacerbated my confusion and dysphoria even more. I love your posts and think of you as a gender guru.

edna mode is helping me in my gender-confusion journey and i love her for that.

I was always ashamed of my face, of my body, my voice, even at the age of five I was impressed (in the sense of shock, no reaction) with my sexuality, I couldn't stay close to the other kids because I knew this strange thing that only I seemed to know and had. "Wrong" is the best word that describes how I felt about myself. I couldn't even look other people in the eye, didn't think I should even be in other people's presence because of that. And all this confusion about feeling weird and not wanting to look weird made me neurotic, when they called me bad words because I don't look masculine I felt like a monster, my neurosis to be normal only increased. I never knew how to be and look like a man, I actually spent years and years watching men in movies, in person, etc, to try to be what Everybody said I should be. My mind was super confused, I acted clumsy for not knowing how to act and be, today I know it was becaus me being a woman but not knowing and even act against. I really thought I was mentally ill. I knew little about LGBT stuff, just a little bit about gay and lesbian. I had never seen what they call "gender ideology" here in my country. I only knew about It when I was already 21/22 years old, but it was only superficially about the political fight and the crap conservatives talked about it. It was only last year, when I was 24, that I started to wonder if I was gay (but I was very resistant about it, I didn't want to be). And that led me to get to know the gender ideology for good, and to discover more and understand better about being a trans woman. It was AMAZING, as soon as I saw the trans woman I instantly thought "hey, that's what I am", without resisting. It was literally like that. With confidence. And the most amazing thing is that all my neurosis and mental confusion that I had just disappeared practically the same time I read what it was to be a transsexual. I never felt it again, I really started to have a calm mind. I was amazed how just knowing what a trans person was, about gender ideology, made me discover what I was and solve my mental problem. For the first time in my life I started to experience what a healthy mind was, no confusion, without thinking I was crazy. I understood the "why" in so much things in me and in my life. I haven't changed my name and I haven't even started HRT but after a year I tried to feminize myself as much as I can with what I have. Sometimes I have a question or two, but it's because I still have things to change, and I remember what my life was like before I knew it and I'm sure I don't want to live that mental hell again. I already wondered if it wasn't too late to transfer gender, there are social problems with people like me here in Brazil (± 52% of the murders of trans people in the world happen in Brazil - and the number may be higher), taking a risk when using a women's bathroom here, a matter of money to change. But I don't want to go back to living that mental hell at all, whatever those risks if the cost of "security" is in the end not to live.

This just really helped me come to terms with the fact I am trans and clearly had a issues with my birth sex. I just really took a deep dive into how much I dissociate myself from my body to avoid facing the fact my body doesn't match what I feel on the inside . With just those 3 questions you addressed .... thank you so much ! 🖤

"If you could wake up tomorrow and be a man or a woman, which would you be?" In that case, I would feel MORE comfortable as a woman. It's not that I despise being a guy, it just doesn't feel "right," to me. For the longest time, I didn't really think about it, but the more I do, the more I say to myself "Wow...uh...yeah being male, being masculine, being bulky, being...everything doesn't feel right."

Thus far this has been the most clear and helpful video on the subjects. Listened to about 10 other videos before but those just left me more confused than when I started. Thank you for shining some actual clarity.

For me its not about colours, clothes... Its about "she/her" feels like someone else not me Its that everytime I feel sick looking at mirror seeing my hips and chest.. Its about my name My voice I feel like I losed myself in something my pareants wanted me to be I just want ppl to see me the way I am..at least my family and friends Im not confused I was for years But now I know who I am And its hard But once im 18 ill be free and my own person

Those two questions helped me escape the back n forth from me being non-binary and the other side constantly rechecking reality but I literally haven't had that back n forth since I knew of these questions and now I feel SO much PEACE and PRIDE knowing for a fact I AM NON-BINARY! Thank you.🌈🤩 ⚧️😋🏳️‍🌈

I hear it spelled out so simply and I still can't say it out loud, but I cried when I watched this and every tear is an admission of reality whether I want it or not. Thank you for helping us.

this video rly helped me process my feelings and my gender identity, thanks! after watching this i went straight to getting a therapist, and now im almost 9 months on HRT. happier than ever :)

THIS VIDEO WAS SO DAMN HELPFUL!! This question of "being" and "feeling" really made me realize that I'm trans! THANKS ALOT FOR MAKING THIS VIDEO!!😭

OTHER TIPS FOR HOW TO KNOW YOUR GENDER 1. dont think abt only pronouns but think also about sister/brother/sibling or daughter/son/kid 2. try to imagine yourself in the future, can you see yourself as the gender you are rn? 3. if you were born the opposite gender, would you want to transition? 4. try to search sth abt your dreamed career, like if you want to be a singer, search boy and girl duo and try to imagine which one you'd like to be more, which voice you'd want, etc. for me this video worked: kzfaq.info/get/bejne/qtePqrt70sidaGQ.html hope it helps a bit:)

This helped me SO MUCH with my inner self-doubt and the doubt projected on me by my family. These questions I needed to hear and I verbally answered out loud like she was my own therapist. As I listened and talked to the screen, I am feeling and believing I am transgender. The feeling was always there, of course, just the societal/familial pressure got to my head. Especially with the thought of being intimate with someone is terrifying to me and *still is* after being with my partner for close to 2 years. But watching this video helped me so much with connecting with myself instead of trying to hide what my family didn't want to hear come out of my mouth. Thank you so much for this mental clarity.

The question of do you want to be or feel has the biggest effect on me. I always wanted to BE who i am inside and how I live my life is definitely not how the world should be it took 50 years to realize.

Thank you for this video, I find it really helpful. I’m exploring my gender identity/expression, and videos like these help me slow down and think about it more clearly (rather than blindly panicking and overthinking). That part about ‘feeling’ vs ‘being’ really resonated with me! Having figured out I’m pretty comfortable identifying as a gender non conforming girl, I’m going to experiment more with the way I express myself :)

I’ve always been fixated on being androgynous since I’ve been small. It wasn’t until quarantine that I gave my gender a name: non-binary. I love it ❤

I have browsed some of the items. OMG I love your command of the subjects. This is a wonderful resource to help people who have gender issues. Thank you so very much for what you do.

i seriously can't thank you enough for posting this, it really helped me out in understanding myself

I'm non-binary and I was wondering how my identity specifically works espacially compared to the binary idea of gender. I thought "it's like I'm both and neither at the same time" but thinking about that key question you asked brought me to a statement: "I want to feel like both and be neither" which is way more specific and helpes me understand that schrodinger's cat feeling I have a bit more ❤️

I still dont understand what it means 2 "feel like" or "be" a man/woman. Do all men/women feel/look/act the same?

Thats a great question (feeling vs. being). I'm glad I watched this! It's definitely given me a better understanding!

I start t in a month and I've spent 8 years researching as much as I can on the whole process and making sure this is the right decision for me before I fully do it. finding your channel, watching your videos, has helped reassure me so very much. thank you so much.

Im crying so hard. I’ve been battling this question for years now. I’ve been at war with myself for so long. Thank you so much for uploading this video, this knowledge just saved my life. Life will be even harder now and if I pursue transition I will lose everything, but for now I just want to revel in this acknowledgment. I’m a man. I’ve always been a man. I’m not a lesbian, I am a straight man. I can’t keep dissociating and pretending anymore because it’s killing me. I feel like I’m rotting. I’m barely functional anymore but for the first time in a long time at least this pain holds meaning.

Thank you for the video. I am a trans binary female. My journey has taken many years. I have no memory of my childhood. I have no memories before aged 10. It was only in puberty when I knew something was different and because I had no support network to help my anxieties this left me confused for many years and many attempted purges of my female self. I acknowledge your comment that it is a very individual journey and different for everyone. Now in my early 50s and taking feminising hormones and presenting as a woman the edge has been taken off many of my old anxieties. I suppose this is never a clear cut neat journey for many but I have learned that you have to be as honest with yourself as you possibly can. Your videos often raise issues to which I can relate. Thanks

This is my favorite video from you, Dr. I've watched a number of times and feel like I have to come back to it over and over.❤

When you told us to ask ourselves the key questions it really helped me figure it out more thank you!! This video was very helpful! 😊

At 5 yrs old my mom said I always told her I wanted to be a girl and that never changed I pretended well , but I never really “fit” in with the boys. I’ve been trans for as long as I can remember but I didn’t come out until I was 22.. I’m 24 now

You’re doing amazing work, thank you ❤️

You've helped me so much with my identity and have helped me with a lot of confusion about my identity i love your videos and they've really helped me

Always wonderful content. I personally appreciate you very much. Far and away the most knowledgeable and plentiful provider on line. I wish I could be a in person client.

me when i was 7: *in love with every male me now : *realising i’m not in love, but experiencing gender dysphoria and gender envy

I studied and became a Psychilogist while living in Buenos Aires, Argentina. Also lost my spelling and grammar there. I AM A WOMAN. always knew.

Thank you so much. The key question really cleared things up for me.

this was incredibly helpful! I feel much more confident and less confused now. Thank you!!

One of the biggest indicators for me was that ever since childhood, whenever I would draw my ideal self or design my avatar online it was almost always male or androgynous. I remember being so embarrassed and disappointed in my circumstance whenever I got outed or had to tell an online friend my assigned gender. When puberty hit, I hid my chest as much as I could and when my mom commented I was getting curves, it felt foreign to me. But my brain goes naaaahhhh, I must be faking it, right? Lol

I noticed once I put on my moms makeup and I really enjoyed it

This has been insane for me, and you genuinely helped me figure myself out. Thank you so much!

Been questioning a lot this year and this helped me immensely. Thank you

The last part of this video where you explain the dicotomy between feeling and being hit me hard. On your how gender dysphoria feels video I had expressed the fact that I often wish or pray that I would wake up in a female body, in fact I've been doing it as far back as twelve. I wasn't fully sure if what I have been experiencing was gender dysphoria but you've helped to confirm that is likely what I have been experiencing all this time. Thank you for your videos. A question though, does the sense of feeling of being trapped and overwhelmed by one's biologically sex in relation to one's gender identity tend to disapate with treatment or is it more mitigation of those feelings?

When i was in middle school i realized that something was not right because i started feel like i was a girl and almost all my friends were girls but then when i started my first year of highschool i thought it was a phase and i pushed those feelings off for a year but when i was 16 twoards the end of my sophomore year the feeling of wanting to be a woman returned so i started hrt and blockers when I was a junior in highschool i realized that i started to become a lot happier and that feeling of dysphoria was going away and during the summer break i ended up having gender reassignment surgery and now being out of highschool almost 19 i am extremely happy with myself and my friends really supported me as i was transitioning from male to female

the part of "feel" and "be" helped me understand myself much more. a little while ago i came out to myself and others as agender. but at the same time i was still feeling a gender crisis wondering why I'm sometimes okay with being feminine and sometimes dysphoric about being seen as a girl/woman. i wondered why it felt nice to "feel like" a man sometimes although I don't feel like a "man", and why being feminine sometimes feels comfortable and "me" i wondered how this could be happening while I'm also agender, "how could that be?" this video made me able to put it in words in the right and best way. when you explained what "being" means, it helped a lot. "being is a constant feeling radiating all the time at your core" this type of existence, yeah. exactly. thinking about a constant radiating feeling at my core of being a woman? not for me. a man? not for me either. my "constant existence/core" that i feel/wanna feel all the time is nothing at all, genderless (aka being agender), but what i wanna "feel like"/wear or behave on each day just depends on how i feel at the time or day or moment. aka the expression part

THANK YOU DR Z!!! This helped guide me in the right direction in my questioning

If I woke up one morning and I was a boy I would be thrilled but like if that were to happen I could just shrug and be like well it wasn't my choice it just happened and just live my life as a boy.

I’ve been wrestling with this since puberty. I think this really helped. I always want to feel like a man but I also feel strange calling myself one. I have chest and hip dysphoria but I’m fine with the lower half. I really don’t know what to do. I really want to cut my hair short and be more masculine and bind. I can’t get a binder because I live with family who I’m not out to yet so a strange package with a cheap binder in it showing up at their door would draw me some attention. I can’t find any binders that I can buy in person so if anyone know anything about any I can just go to a store and buy, please let me know. Thank you so much for reading this and I wish you the best with your gender struggles.

I watched a lot of videos on this topic. This was the most clear one, i understood lots of my confusions. And i love the vibes, they are very comforting and relaxing ^^

I think your perspective and Questions were very eye opening ❤thank you.

ive know i was trans since i was 10 and i came out when i was 11 (last year before my birthday) but i always had a weird feeling about being a girl at birth, i never wore dresses, never like to be called a "pretty girl" or just a girl in general, and always felt sick being in all female sport classes. but i always enjoyed being accidentally mis-gendered, wich lead me to physical dysphoria during puberty and i do both feel and want to be a man so i guess i really am trans. my first appointment with a GIC i coming up so wish me luck (if you have tips on what will happen pls tell ;w;)

I got sad when my sister went through puberty. She was looking more like a woman and I wasn’t. I’m gonna come out soon

I was trying to think of something funny to comment but this video was seriously helpful and made me a lot more confident in my gender identity. Thanks🥰

You deserve more subs and likes!!! I like how you explain things

i'm non binary (born female) and have been for a while but just recently, i've been going back and thinking about it all. i've questioned myself a lot with how i acted and my physical features. i've always wanted a deeper voice, a more masculine figure, shorter hair, and everything to appear physically male. i think that i would enjoy being seen as a male, but sometimes, i don't necessarily hate my current body. sometimes i don't mind looking feminine, but most of the time when i look in the mirror, i hated how curvy my body was, how small and cutesy i looked when i dressed up. i guess the thing that i am saying is that i'm tired of being too feminine when i'm non binary. i'm still figuring out if i am FTM or just non binary, but i do know that i want to be more masculine. i even like to think of myself as being born male and i don't mind the thought of that. i'll continue to question and find out more about myself though, and hopefully i'll reach an ending that i'm satisfied with. :) thank you for making this video!! i loved it!

I didn't suspect that I was trans until I was an adult. Given the choice between being female 100% of the time and being male 100% of the time I would choose being female 100% of the time, because being referred to as female feels really good. I like being referred to with she/her pronouns and I want to have big boobs and no body hair. So I am pretty sure that I am a transwoman. I could turn out to be a transfeminine non-binary person, because I like some stuff that is stereotypically masculine, like songs about war.

So I'm just going through puberty and this was very helpful. The be or feel questions is super helpful.

Thank you! This really helped me confirm my feelings and make me more certain of my identity as a trans masculine/trans man individual

I have known since I was 4 or 5 that I was supposed to be a girl nor a boy. I am now 61.

just want to feel like a woman and be relaxed around them because I've been always nervous around girls

I just found this and I am so glad I did. Thank you so much this genuinely made me feel a lot better about myself and understand a bit more too!

Hi Doctor Z. Your videos are extremely informative and helpful. Thank you for making them available.