BPD: How to control extreme emotions

Рет қаралды 77,316

13 жыл бұрын

What you can do to understand and control your own (borderline personality disorder) emotions again.
I hope you are all doing well. Thank you so much for all the love!! :) I will start answering e-mails etc. tomorrow, but thank you all so much!!

Пікірлер: 227

@carlasullivan3637 6 жыл бұрын

Isolation is the only way I can cope with bpd. I enjoy my own company rather than deal with people

@Lilpennyboo 5 жыл бұрын

Sharla Cobain I'm pretty sure that only makes it worse, eve tho I know isolation feels so good.

@creescrazylife901 5 жыл бұрын

This is 100% me. I hide. 😔 I've done this for years.

@Luukyana 5 жыл бұрын

I isolated myself for 2 years straight. No job, living alone, few mandatory family meetups but thats it. Now i came back to a "normal" life and i have never felt better. It's harder, it's a goddamn rollercoaster, but i at least feel life has some purpose when i have people around me and i do things and create special memories with them. It's never healthy to be all alone.

@blackrebelrose5098 5 жыл бұрын

YES!!!!!

@lucakrol938 4 жыл бұрын

Im trying to deal with them and today i failed,my mind took over, we failing

@arsenicqueen69 10 жыл бұрын

I feel like I need to send this to my boyfriend and family. It's so hard to describe what it's like to have BPD.

@isit1984yet 6 жыл бұрын

There's a video on YT that says "Narcissists create BPD, the victim that bites back!" I think that title says a lot. My father was/is a raging narcissist, he couldn't have anyone around him with a self esteem. When I got older I just lashed out. The problem is, it never stopped, and if I feel threatened or abandoned, I lash out. I fI could stop this, 80% of my life troubles would disappear.

@ayeeedrianx7554 5 жыл бұрын

Relatable %100 but with mother.

@jovankrstic1851 4 жыл бұрын

True!

@rick29ism 7 жыл бұрын

i suffer from this every day. lost two marriages because of it. i hate myself for it but i cant quit being this way. so im glad this and other videos exists so i can try to get a grip, and btw meds dont work for me. and it is the worst with those i love. i feel i have to control everything to keep this invisible fear of hurt from happening. but in the end, how i act is what ruins it, not what i fear.

@ricobonifacio1095 5 жыл бұрын

That's my old youtube page. This is my new one. That's not my name its Rico. Haha. My daughter took over my old youtube account.

@ricobonifacio1095 5 жыл бұрын

I did write that. Not her.

@hmds88 9 жыл бұрын

You're videos are extremely edifying and I feel that you're coming from a good place which makes it all the more meaningful. Much appreciated. Cheers

@delasjourney9104 7 жыл бұрын

hmds88 GOD is guiding this beautiful man I believe that .

@sadqaeedasedwq 9 жыл бұрын

The first minute i was thinking "Why'd I click this? Am I getting that desperate and stupid? Wow I'm pathetic." But I then decided to ride it out and finish the video. I'm feeling better now. Thank you for making the video :D

@howtodrawmangawithsetsaled6074 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you for making this. It helped calm me down. Videos I would love to see: 1. Dealing with failure with BPD. Or how to not see everything as a failure. 2. Dealing with criticism 3. How to not take everything personally 3. How to communicate about your emotions to someone who does not have bpd and does not understand why youd dont just... try harder. Why you're using your illness as an excuse to be lazy.

@lovethislie1 10 жыл бұрын

Your videos help me a lot when I feel sad and distressed. I come and watch them again and understand I'm not alone and it's okay to feel and express my self in a healthy way. Thank you for the tips

@kreese316 5 жыл бұрын

I really appreciate your intensity. Often people who teach on BPD, but don't have it, will be overtly calm. They think it makes others calm. This doesn't work well with BPD, or not often. When we have crazy emotions, and another person is extemely calm; that in itself can feel invalidating. Thanks for sharing, but also for sharing with intensity. It is calming to me.

@QuorynN 7 жыл бұрын

You are amazing! I am so happy you exist. :D

@andreanaccarato534 11 жыл бұрын

Bas, you are really brave to post so publicly about a mental illness so stigmatized.Thank you for giving practical advice on how to notice emotions without exploding -- and how to express them when appropriate! Please keep the videos coming!

@xEvAnnie 13 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for this amazing video. You can't imagine how much that helped right now!

@JohnHewak 6 жыл бұрын

I can’t tell you how impressive your work is. You understand. You are excellent presenter. You are a brilliant man.

@deyvidymvaz 8 жыл бұрын

You make me realize myself as better as I could. Great videos, mate! They are helping me a lot with my BPD.

@AldrigStille 11 жыл бұрын

thank you. I have nothing else to say. This video helps a lot. I have a lot of trouble understanding and dealing with emotions. I have borderline and you videos are a great help for me. Thank you.

@octavia7408 4 жыл бұрын

You have no idea how much this helps. Thank you so much :')

@matijabg 11 жыл бұрын

Just discovered your wonderful channel. The work you are doing is making so much difference to me. It makes me want to know and love myself. Thank you so much for sharing! Matt

@jestaserialkilla 12 жыл бұрын

awesome man, ive just been diagnosed with bpd, and this alone is giving me reason to focus on calming the mental storm that brews everyday lol. peace and love homie!

@beach2befree 11 жыл бұрын

I like how you, break things down for everyone to understand. Keep up the great job.

@TheMorriganTakesWing 11 жыл бұрын

I just started watching your videos and i almost started crying. I was diagnosed but never given any treatment for bpd, and it's good to know people like you exist. Knowing I'm not the only one is a feeling i could never be thankful enough for. Thank you!

@absolutepresence1 11 жыл бұрын

Thanks for your compassion and kindness.

@stargrl06 12 жыл бұрын

thank you so much for this....having just found out I have BPD, I really appreciate your honesty. You talk about your anxiety but are actually calming to me somehow, maybe even try to make a few mindfulness meditation videos!

@Lollipop22344 11 жыл бұрын

actually crying i can't believe how much of this matches me! it explains to much.

@jjsiegal1 10 жыл бұрын

Bas....you are the Best my Man!

@Remo860 7 жыл бұрын

I have BPD. How do I stop trying to manipulate people? Thanks.

@redkween1637 7 жыл бұрын

TotalNekro I'm trying to learn how to care about other people in my life. I think once u stop thinking about yourself you can have healthier relationships.

@opheliamcfedries3103 6 жыл бұрын

You stop, shut up be humble ignore your envy and jealousy. Also remember don't cut, what you can untie. Easy. Path of least resistance. Breathe

@SkullKing11841 6 жыл бұрын

My guess is that your not trying to manipulate people. Manipulating is like rationally planning out how to manipulate someone. People with BPD have knee jerk reactions that look like there manipulating but there just trying to get there emotional needs met. Marsha Linehan, the founder of DBT, said that if people with BPD are so good at manipulating why do they keep ending up in hospital. It doesn't make sense. Do a course of DBT either in a group or with a psychologist. Both is preferable. If you learn better coping stratergies for emotions you will not feel the need to try and get your needs met in knee jerk emotional ways. That's the best I've got, maybe try asking a psychologist who works with people who have BPD.

@AaronW-ww4ds 6 жыл бұрын

Ophelia McFedries BPD has nothing to do with jealousy or envy having those does not equate to having a mental illness because those two things are not remotely a symptom of any mental illness

@AaronW-ww4ds 6 жыл бұрын

Unfortunately with BPD we don't actually have the intention to manipulate unlike people with actual narcissistic personality disorder as those with NPD know exactly what they're doing to get what they want BPD suffers myself included as I have BPD we aren't actually consciously doing it we also black out a lot and have no recolation of what we've done or said and the intense mood swings that happen frequently especially through out the day unlike bipolar where their mood swings go from manic to normal to depressed there mood swings happen to last and change over a good few months even though the BPD treatment is exactly the same as bipolar

@AmyKnits 11 жыл бұрын

Another excellent video. Thank you so much for your insight and extremely valuable info.

@j.c.nightwalker5322 6 жыл бұрын

I would like you to talk about children visiting their other parent who has BPD. It can be extremely difficult for them and have lasting effects.

@shotten99 11 жыл бұрын

Dude, you're great. Much appreciated.

@jnson2010 12 жыл бұрын

I am so happy i found your channel! I wish I had found your videos before.... =) love 'em alllll

@disiluzhund 12 жыл бұрын

Terrific video. Love your enthusiasm and show of confidence. Yeah, I know, if I saw the unedited version and knew the hours you spent deliberating over what parts to keep and what to cut out. Be assured that you have all the qualities necessary for what you're doing...intelligence, creativity, a magnetic personality, great looks. "It's in the bag, man! It's in the bag!" (From the Metalocolypse / Deathklok cartoons)

@sana2991 11 жыл бұрын

Thank you sooo much! awesome videos which are realllllyyy helpful! :)

@TheTubularman 2 жыл бұрын

You have helped me alot. You have no idea. Thanks! Thank you billion!

@mefuglyful 12 жыл бұрын

the best talk therapy ever. you bring a great insight into the illness and in ways that can help others in just a generally way also. i have bpd and schizophrenia for 18yrs now. so ive been to many therapies etc. i thank you for well conducted insightful video. ive subscribed and will look forward to more. :)

@MarDesire 12 жыл бұрын

Thank you so so much again! PLEASE keep up with this great work, now I will be watching your videos regularly to be more self-aware. Maybe please make some video about how to behave with others, about derealisation, and how to balance your system of life plans (too high 'amibtions', too quickly changed life plans).. Well, I will appreciate any new video. Cheers from Poland!

@mistymornings 12 жыл бұрын

Your insight and ideas are brilliant!

@MsScarredSoul 13 жыл бұрын

Yes I have to say this is a great video, nice editing! I am the same I cant feel anger and dont know why, your explanation though rings true with me as well. Thank you for making the video :) xx

@yinka321 10 жыл бұрын

You are AWESOME!!! thank you so much for your time and knowledge.

@lucindaking4779 10 жыл бұрын

These are very good videos thanks for helping me understand this disorder. I am a caregiver of a person that has this and I appreciate any help I can get.

@Mab0ww 10 жыл бұрын

Dankje voor maken van deze video :) laatst te horen gekregen dat im borderline heb en je videos helpen me mezelf wat beter te begrijpen :)

@goodcanadiangirl9664 11 жыл бұрын

Thank u so much for these wonderful vlogs, I have just stumbled on you I find u to be a kindred spirit and I love how you add a touch of comedy

@anitamartirosian 12 жыл бұрын

Much love to you. Your videos are very helpful!!

@yahiamahdy7639 6 жыл бұрын

Really your the best I have BPD and I searched that topic cause today I had a feeling I wanna cry but I dnt wanna do it infront of others so I left them so that I dnt collapse and hurt others what I like in ur video is you talk from the prespective of the patient you feel us cz it annoys me when someone dont feel it and talks about it really will try your tip continue the goodwork!

@noragilbert5691 12 жыл бұрын

I am very glad to found so great videos. You could be a therapist. Sometimes when I can I run out from the Apartment( I can not say my Apartment because I still did not found my place in this world) deep in the forrest and shout out my anger. After that I cry so loud until I can not anymore. After that I feel better. I think of you.

@waiferaway2983 5 жыл бұрын

I like how you explain it. I feel comfortable relating to it.

@catamountsnow 12 жыл бұрын

thanks for posting this. I'm in the Army and I've been in over 5 years and i have been suffering with the possibility of having PBD. Didn't even know i ever had this, and to top it all off This shit is very frustrating not knowing what exactly it is i am going through.

@NoMoreDrama55 12 жыл бұрын

I have just come across your videos for the first time today... thank you so much for your courage, honesty & strength of character. I now know for sure (having read SEVERAL books on the subject) that I have BPD. While I am so grateful to have found your videos, I am also terrified as I was diagnosed with Major Depression in 2003... and now, although I feel somewhat empowered to KNOW... I am just wondering "Why Me"??? Please continue doing this, it's VITAL that you do (Ireland).

@thelambles 11 жыл бұрын

What a fantastic insight in the world of BPD. I suggest any therapist working with aBPD sufferer would do well to watch your videos! Can you do a video on BPD and addictive behaviour?

@gerryfrancis2918 10 жыл бұрын

I enjoyed that description...I would like you to talk about how to manage different ranges if emotions that is happening whilst working in a large corporate environment..

@bethzaidallera3715 10 жыл бұрын

Thank you for posting this.

@Pfokster 11 жыл бұрын

THAT was a great way to demonstrate what goes on inside the head of a person I used to live with, who is also narcissistic, OCD and a pathological liar. Can you do video about each of those?

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Luv4Learning Hey Colleen, Thank you! So great to hear that you are doing so much better at this!

@Prudenthermit 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you this was a wonderful & helpful video!

@samar7151 10 жыл бұрын

ive watched 2 seconds of this and i love

@Pinkcouture111 6 жыл бұрын

Thank you, I will watch this many times until I learn it

@chrismeetsguitar 11 жыл бұрын

what a good speaker!

@paulipaz 12 жыл бұрын

I really am loving your videos! haha

@wampirabbit 12 жыл бұрын

i have just fallen in love with this guy

@rockcrazygal5166 8 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing!

@samar7151 10 жыл бұрын

this speaks my life!!

@PsychoCat101 11 жыл бұрын

I Love you , your energy is amazing and your like a mirror to me , thank you ,

@spiritedrenee9895 5 жыл бұрын

How do I control my fear of abandonment and anger?

@8080shelly 9 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for your helpful videos. Could you do a video about how how to deal with aggressive management style in the workplace?

@maesap22 11 жыл бұрын

You are hilarious.....but more importantly you have made my day, I feel like a double Gin and Tonic now, make that 2!! LOL

@thevibe5880 11 жыл бұрын

Please talk about how to deal with difficult working environments for people with BPD. :D Thank you for all your wonderful tips.

@lesyavagner2009 10 жыл бұрын

Thank you so so much!!

@tmptwassteffensen5807 11 жыл бұрын

You are amazing!

@jdStarlight 13 жыл бұрын

Great video! Thank you.

@drivenhome 12 жыл бұрын

Such a sad thing to think that your BPD is a negative condition when all you come across as is a sweet saint. You're wonderful.

@daddymarkram 11 жыл бұрын

Will try your calming technique. Been seen a therepist for about 1½ years now and gotten nowhere. At best I can repress my anger but it's getting harder and harder. I will subscribe, thanks for the videos.

@UnEn666 13 жыл бұрын

Dude you are freakin goddamn awesome. Just, idk, awesome. awesome. awesome.

@merto5582 11 жыл бұрын

your just great mate,keep it up

@karlyschirtzinger3365 11 жыл бұрын

Hi, thanks for all the videos! They have helped me and my fiance tremendously! I have a question though, is there any way that you could post a video on how to handle anxiety at work? I work with children, and I find myself not being able to handle my day because my anxiety interferes completely. If you could post something about that, that would be AMAZING! Thank you for all the videos!

@marelicainavokado 11 жыл бұрын

Yes. I have too, I am an emotional mess now and can't control my tears. Kids loved bullying you more because you expressed your emotions more strongly and couldn't ignore them. It's like jabbing a person in his leg because you knew it was broken. Your strong reaction made other kids hate your "weenieness" and they rejected you. Other factors are parents not acknowledging your emotions ("don't be such a crybaby"), emotional and sexual abuse.

@ryleighkate3505 4 жыл бұрын

I have bpd an EVERY day I cry for hours on end, scream, freak out, want to self harm..... How do I stop????

@PeppaPicky 10 жыл бұрын

You are great! Your videos are very helpful. Greetings from Brazil!

@dsag2703 11 жыл бұрын

I love your videos,I didn't know what to do and I was desperate because I could not control myself, but suddenly this video appeared. Sorry if I write something wrong, Im from Colombia and my english is not perfect.

@phillyry 10 жыл бұрын

Well put Sir.

@melaniejanefleming5743 7 жыл бұрын

watchin ur videos helps a lot

@aprilstorm 5 жыл бұрын

I don't know about others but I think the problem is it's quite impossible to bottle up emotions with this condition...

@RosesR4U 5 жыл бұрын

Adrianne Rivera Agree , me too ❗️

@leighannenoelle 13 жыл бұрын

Very very good video!!!!

@spicyrigid 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for this

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@PutMe6FeetDeep Thank you so much George! It's always so great to read your comments! Thank you for that!

@cazpixieg 8 жыл бұрын

Hi!!So I've literally just (as in 2 days ago) been diagnosed with BPD. And your videos are great!! You're making me feel so much better about something that I feel I cannot control. Have you been trough therapy. What helped? People think we don't want to change but I'll do everything in my power to get out of these destructive patterns of behaviour. Thanks for reading Take care,Caz xx

@1819050 11 жыл бұрын

Helpful. Thank you.

13 жыл бұрын

I enjoyed this video a lot, it is linking to the DBT skills that I'm learning, so it makes a lot of sense to me. I would like to learn more items from the "what if" book, if you don't mind, and also if you have recommendations for inspiration for "what if" solutions and more info about how you made it, etc :)

@phabbiola 12 жыл бұрын

thank you for this video!

@pearli8181 6 жыл бұрын

Awesome video..

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable But the most important thing is that you tell/express what happened to you. You can ask your friend to think about your feelings before doing something like that again. You stand up for yourself without being needy or unnecessary emotional.(2/2)

@jimmcgoran939 8 жыл бұрын

Thank you this was very helpful

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Candeeta4u Hey, good question! Well, in that case you don't talk with your emotions anymore, but with your mind. (otherwise it could still lead to extreme emotions on both sides) In the 'at a party' example you can tell one of your (best) friends how it made you feel without judging. And maybe they have good explanation for what happened. (1/2)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@leighannenoelle Thank you so much Leigh-Anne!! It always makes me so happy to get a comment from you! thank you! :D

@vickibowers03 7 жыл бұрын

Love your videos

@MeAndMyBlackTable 11 жыл бұрын

You're welcome. Take care.

@XxcandystarxX 13 жыл бұрын

awesome video bas :)

@Thenewfallingsacred 10 жыл бұрын

He Loves you.You don't have to keep putting up the wall because He can see right through it man. He knows what's happened in your life. He knows your shame, your guilt, and all of your pain that you keep hiding. Stop running away because He's been chasin you your entire life!

@Twinflower82 12 жыл бұрын

I feel a lot of agony among people, and one thing that helps me is first: To be aware of that my feelings are playing a game with me (and that the fear is not very "true"), and then: Put on my fantastic head phones with my soft New Age music. It calms me down, and after some minutes I often cry and feel that I love everybody! This I have to do all the time. Please tell me that I suffer from BPD, because nobody has yet called my disease BPD, but I recognize myself in that one.

@missdarkangelxxx 12 жыл бұрын

I think you should make a video, on how to try and stop worrying so much on fear of abandonment. People leaving us . Thanks :)

@cheerios0are0forever 13 жыл бұрын

amazing video, bas! i have a question.... what do you think it means if a person want to self harm, even when there arent any negetive thoughts, or even bad things happening to them? they just want to SH just to.. wel SH? is that when the SH becones an addiction? have you ever felt that way?

@yeayeawudeva01 12 жыл бұрын

it will take time but you can't give up. sometimes it's easy for me to stand up for myself and other times i just shut down completely :( i have to work on that. try finding assertive ways to express your feelings

@ChatiseE 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable Now that you've put it in words I realize I do that alot and it does help me :) ty for the tips, they make me more aware of what I've been doing to downsize my anxiety