I’m pretty sure I’m not into girls, but whenever I see an attractive girl, I think, wow, she’s really pretty. But my head, just to make sure I’m not interested in girls, says, “ What if you kissed her? “ I immediately say no. But my ocd says, “ you’re in denial. “ Most of the time I can’t tell if this is my ocd or not. I don’t want to like girls. And my mom says if I don’t want to, I don’t. I really don’t want to like girls. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being interested in girls, I just don’t think that’s me.

I have hocd. Its gotten so bad that it gives me panic attacks and i go through derealization. Everything becomes something sexual. I cant even hear my songs because the artist is a male. Its gotten to a point to where i avoid the same gender. Your videos are very helpful and its good to know that theres a human side to this and that I am not alone. Thank u.

Listen everyone that is struggling with this (like myself) I am telling you this not for reassurance but because it is facts if you knew you were straight before hocd you are straight stay strong everyone we will go threw this 💙

Girl I am CRACKING UP. I've been in ERP and CBT for two months and I am just now able to laugh at this! I even spiked today! But I'm back down to center. The voices are always there, telling me I'm lying. I'm not scared anymore though. They're just annoying! Please keep making these! Everyone deserves to feel free from this. This video makes me laugh.

My best friends gay which actually helps me a lot with HOCD and here’s some things he told me - gay ppl don’t need to “make sure” they’re gay or straight - gay ppl get anxiety about coming out not about actually being gay -

Thank you for this! I noticed that during holidays that I get more anxiety about this theme of OCD. Your videos are so refreshing and empowering!

Wow!!!! You so hit it on the head, with the, wish I could go back, to before OCD struck!!!!

Chrissie, you're a saint! Thank you! Have suffered from this for more years than I care to admit. Could never understand why sexually I liked only females yet was crucifying myself mentally with guilt of what if I'm gay, what if others think I'm gay etc etc. Awful! X

The problem is that a lot of people here with ocd say that deep down, they know they're not gay, but I don't! This gives me so much anxiety, i even get panic attacks because of this from time to time.

Hi Chrisse! I just recently binge watched alot of your videos they are amazing. I'm a gay man, been gay ALL my life, boy crazy as you just established. Judging by what I've learnt from your videos is that I fit the general themes also. I was raised in a Christian, conservative household so was always scared about many things. During my teenhood I'd had constant intrusive thoughts such as "I need to get good grades." "If I don't I'll be suck in this environment forever." Etc. The day after I came out (ny experience my terrible) I felt overwhelming anxiety because of religious pressure etc that sexual intrusive thoughts appeared and I tried to "convince" myself that I could change from "gods healing prayer" but girls really dont do it for me lol. Then university came and was no longer in a toxic environment for the most part so I never had the intrusive thoughts anymore. They usually strike when I have to be back home. As of now I'm experiencing a loss of libido towards men due to being back home for the quarantine. Could the anxiety and stress of being back home be affecting me again as once again I'm having intrusive thoughts. I in no way enjoy it. Thank you for the support!

Chrissie thank you so much. I don't feel so alone.

Thanks for shining a light on this. :) I didn't realize that this was a thing but it makes perfect sense! 💗to anyone who has HOCD.

This is so helpful. You are amazing!

great vid

Thank you so much.

Omg. Im so sad. Ive liked girls all my life. Including now. But when I was 12, I had this one gay thought. And it scared me. My mind was trying to make me think that the reason It apeared in my head was because I enjoyed it. But I really didn't. And til this day. My mind keeps telling me that I am. But deep down im not. Please help me. I hate these thoughts and im not sure why they happen.

I literally have this but the funny part is that I am gay and I worry I could be straight well not worry because I no I'm not but another ocd feeds off this one which really screws me over and then I have another ocd that I've been recovering from so yeah not to mention all the other disorders I have not related to ocd

yep yep yep....I never thought about being anything but straight until someone close to me talked about how a certain item of clothing was 'very very gay' and it was something I've liked wearing for years. Logically I know clothing and styles and honestly all that kind of stuff doesn't matter and anyone can like anything. Clothing doesn't have a sexual orientation lol....and probably this was said in good fun but it like clicked and set me OFF. It also didn't help that soon after that I was talking to someone about some issues I was having with intimacy and sex and she immediately suggested I was probably asexual but 'didn't realize it.' That kind of shit. Nope. It set me off and I"still angry about it b/c no one should just tell someone they think they're orientation is different....of course this person also told me I was abused as a child but 'didn't realize it.' Maybe she was right maybe she wasn't but the fact she probably was made methinking she was right about everything b/c O C D. FUN TIMES.

8:30 thats was my problem when ocd start hit me ,, i stoped eating bananas because my mind told me that if i put banana in my mouth , that mean i like Di.. , now i laugh about this , but i still have ocd now its about memories , i remember a guy who scared me when i was a kid , now my ocd tell me what if it was a rape and i forget about it , i also have pure O rumination , words or songs repeating in my head every time i wake up .

Sometimes ERP gets really scary. I "admitt" to myself that I am gay and then I go through the process of erp and it just turns out to be so scary cause sometimes it just seems so real. Does anybody have a tip to make things easier?

Chrissie Can u help me with an HOCD and others please, I'm begging.. I've been struggling very much. My parents don't help me they think I'm just nuts, and I don't have enough money on my own.I want to defeat it but I don't know really how.I don't have an iPhone so I can't download the app.

I so get this because I thought I use to be gay but I’m not but because I was scared of being criticised for judging homosexuality I feel/felt worse

Damn you're right

Anyone struggling with hocd wanna be buddies? We can talk through this! Btw, Chrissie, this video is amazing :)

So funny... I‘m so convinced I‘m gay as I‘m watching this 😂 Depending on WHAT clues I see in my past.. 🤷🏼‍♀️ so funny. Yesterday I remembered when I was about 10, I wrote stories about me getting my first boyfriend and I was sooo excited and sooo many more things that scream „you‘re straight.“. I got hocd at 13 so I don‘t have more experience to rely on... Then there are maaaany things with women which confuse me.. like finding them attractive, admiring them, identifying with them during puberty, etc... so that again is proof I‘m gay 🤷🏼‍♀️ No clue. Right now I really actually wish I could just be gay actually. Would be sooo much easier

Can't tell you how many times I freaked out looking at bansnas and sometimes stil do.. But my one of the greatest fear is getting aroused and till now never felt aroused for anything else than a woman but in recent times in the middle of a sexual act someone I respect and think of as father figure popped in (just face though).After that I am afraid of being aroused and I try my hardest not to be turned on by a woman. For weeks I have been trying to avoid women now. I even sometimes freak out when I think someone as women from afar and turns out its a man.

I’m asexual panromantic with a heteromantic lean, and now my OCD is telling me i’m a lesbian and that my attraction to men was all false.

Can we talk

What's up with the bananas

But i am actually scared of being gay and if i am my life will be ruined but so far i don't plan on meeting guys or having anything with them.

The banana thing fucked me up real bad when i was struggling, i also had a bad therapist experience,a therapist told me in the first session that i have ocd, in the second one he told me that he doesn't believe in mental health diagnosis and said that i tend to get stuck on things i think are bad,he told me to think about homosexuality as not a bad thing and he fucked me up really bad, i never was homophobic and never really care too much,what the therapist said have stuck with me for monthes, so i decided not to check to see if i think homosexuality is bad or not, i am living with the uncertainty though!