Imagine how it feels to be a senior in our youth-focused society! Many times I feel invisible!

I've been overweight ever since middle school. I've managed to lose a little weight (never all of it) a few times, but never permanently. It's definitely a sin issue for me. I recognized what Phoenix said about going to food for comfort rather than God. But one of the most powerful and healing moments in my walk with God came about 14 years ago, and it related to this exactly. For context, I've always liked dressing up, and I specifically liked feminine clothing (dresses, skirts, etc). But for a long time I dressed in very nondescript way, because some part of me said I couldn't get away with wearing something pretty. Like those around me would look at me with condescension, like "oh, she thinks she can wear stuff like that. How cute and delusional." One Sunday in church we were singing a worship song, about how beautiful God is. And the Holy Spirit very gently opened my eyes, and showed me that God was saying that to me, too. That I'm beautiful. Not simply that I am loved (which I knew) or that I was accepted through the blood of Jesus (which I knew), but that I was beautiful. It's nearly a decade and a half later, and I'm crying as I type this. This never meant that my sins of overeating and laziness weren't sins. It never meant this was a perfectly healthy weight to be, and I didn't need to change. It doesn't mean I wouldn't be more attractive if I were to get down to a healthier weight. But I don't have to do that in order to be beautiful, just like I don't have to do that to be loved or accepted. Since that day, I started wearing skirts and dresses, and now wear them almost exclusively, just because I've always wanted to, and I like how I look and feel in them. And since that day I've continued to try (mostly unsuccessfully) to get a grip on the various issues that contribute to my weight. I've been seeing a therapist about this for almost two years now. And unfortunately, I'm still deeply in the grip of it. But my worth, and even my beauty aren't tied to that. I'm a sinner, and I'm loved, at the same time. I'm fat, and I'm beautiful, at the same time.

C.H. Spurgeon was a heavy set man who smoked a cigar---and no one argues that he wasn't the greatest preacher of the 19th century

The challenge of food is different than, for example, alcohol or spending. We can live without alcohol or trinkets but we can’t live without food. Additionally, food gives us immediate satisfaction and comfort. But gluttony is no different than any other sin in that we must battle it, rather than surrendering.

I have been large in my midsection for many years. My genetics and prior health issue. I'm never going to be skinny, but I still serve God with all my heart and strength. Reasonable and healthy living, but I am who God made me. 💪

This episode was okay but I think it missed some important points. Yes food can be an idol. But so can the control of a diet, so can the mirror, so can thinness, so can exercise, so can fashion trends and beauty ideals. Embracing body positivity for a season helped me set down my idols of food and all the parts of diet culture. Making peace with my body and letting go of my hatred of it was healing for me and helped me sanctify my relationship with my body and with food. I’m still overweight but I no longer have sin around my eating habits. If I were to make thinness a goal again I think I would fall back into those sin patterns. So I dont think that thinness has to be a goal to overcome the sin.

You missed the whole menopause problem, I put on a whole lot of weight with no change in diet or exercise, just because I hit menopause. thanks for the discussion. God Bless

This is the kind of dialogue we need on this topic! I went to a nutritionist once when I'd let my eating/weight get rather out of hand, and she seemed constantly to be finding ways to excuse me, explain that it wasn't my fault. When you eat this your body chemistry does that and you want more etc. And I just thought, that's sweet of her and everything, to try and get me off the hook, but I'm actually not afraid to shoulder some blame for my own behaviour. No one forced the food down my throat 🤣 Why would I be any more likely to change if I cast myself as a helpless victim of forces beyond my control, than if I acknowledge that I've done wrong? The determination I walked in with kept being squished into this wobbly self-love puddle, when I was actually wanting to change and do better! Bizarre.

It's very easy to be plus size today with our modern food industry. If you eat out and eat the portions given you will gain weight if you do it often.

I’m 65 years old and have battled my weight as long as I remember, before the age of five. I’ve been on diets from the time I was eleven. I wasn’t very much overweight, but tall and “big boned” as my mother put it. At a time when very few kids were overweight, I stood out and she evidently felt it was her job to make me thin. I was the only one of five kids that had this problem. I always knew it was a sin issue because I had an issue with self-control when it came to sugar. I tried and succeeded at many different diets over the years, including the Weigh Down Diet, which focused on God. However, my craving for sugar never abated. I can’t tell you how times times over the years that I asked, begged, and pleaded with God to take the craving away. I figured maybe it was the thorn in my side that I’d just have to live with. When I found out that I have heart disease, I got back to being serious about getting healthy so I could continue trying to witness to my family. I had found success with the low carb/keto diet many years before and had been on it off-and-on for that long, too, but always still experienced sugar cravings. A year and a half ago, I stumbled across the Carnivore diet, or way of eating (woe), and decided to try that. By taking all sweetness out, my craving has disappeared!! It’s the answer to my prayers, in God’s timing!! I can be around anything and not be at all tempted because He has taken that burden from me!! In addition to taking the craving away, I’ve been able to get off my blood pressure and thyroid meds as my body healed. I haven’t lost any weight from being on the woe, but my body is definitely healing and will release the fat when it’s ready. Btw, I need to lose about 30 lbs. I thank God many times every day for taking this burden from me and helping me learn to eat to live, not live to eat!! It’s been such a blessing for me!! ❤

Thank you for this episode. As someone who has struggled with weight and food issues for YEARS I really appreciated this conversation.

Ive had 2 babies in 2 years and people at church body shame me. Its really sad that these are older sisters saying this but I know what I need to work on and it will take time.

This was so good. I appreciate the logic that Phoenix brought to the table. I’ve been overweight and lost the weight and have maintained for years but it is still a struggle to maintain. I struggle with still seeing myself as heavy. I thank the Lord for helping me with this and I have learned and keep learning, it’s about being healthy not skinny.

I have been overweight all my life, been bullied , shamed, hated and so I hate myself so much bc I could not loose weight. When I get to know the Lord I still have a hateful relationship with my body, but God teach me to be at peace with my body but take good decisions about it on EVERY ASPECT, on health, finances, relationships. I loose weight but Im not a thin person and Im ok with it but my health has improved so much, and fir the first time in my life ( Im 56) I could take a picture of me and like it. Love this honest conversation, we don’t shame people but we don’t condone also extreme’s

I’ve struggled with a sweets addiction since I was 10, and for most of my life, I thought I just lacked self-control and felt a lot of shame for not being able to control it, also a lot of embarrassment for gaining weight. I’m now almost 40, and it’s only been in the last few years that I’ve realized that I’ve been using it for self-soothing. I never thought it was emotional eating because it wasn’t an immediate reaction to stress/feelings. It was just constant to maintain a certain level. The school I went to growing up made me feel like I was never good enough, and I felt like an outsider most of the time. And then I would go home to where I shared a room with my narcissist sister, which I also didn’t realize this about her in recent years. I experienced years of cognitive dissonance thinking my sister loves me because she’s my sister but her actions showed she did not. And it wasn’t that she was beating me up or something like that. It was manipulation, gaslighting and blowing up at me out of nowhere so that I had to walk on eggshells around her. So, I learned to turn to food, and now that I’ve realized all this about myself, I’m not instantly fixed. Healing in my case is going to take time. So, I appreciate what Phoenix said about walking into a room and everyone can see your problem. They might think they know your sin, but they don’t see everything underneath. And that’s what I would like to see change in church, both for this issue and so many others - that the problem is probably not as obvious as it seems, and the solution probably isn’t either.

Such a great episode, ladies. Thank you so much for an honest conversation. I’ve been called to speak about this issue to Christian women and I’ve lived in both places. Morbidly obese and now thin. I would love to continue this conversation with both of you!

Dealt with weight issues all my life, even though I've never been a plus size, it's always a battle. I'm almost 50, and finally came to the conclusion that I need to look at food differently, and to choose to be healthy not "skinny" because I've got a different body shape from the "norm" I would never be a super model, and I have to be me, not something society dictates as in many other areas. I read Nancy Pearsy book love thy body and its such an amazing book!

Just commenting to say I almost spilled my mug of SevenWeeks Coffee out of pure excitement when I heard you're partnering with them!

Very interesting conversation. I especially appreciated the reminder that no one really knows the reasons why someone may be overweight or obese. My concern about anyone being overweight or obese is because of the health problems they may encounter, such as diabetes, cardiovascular disease, and cancer. Researchers found that 40% of all cancers are linked to overweight/obesity, especially breast and colon cancer. My parents were very health/nutrition conscious and lived to be 92 and 102 without ever having any chronic diseases. I taught Food and Nutrition at a University before retiring, and have always maintained a healthy diet and exercise lifestyle. I would never judge or fat shame anyone, but I worry silently about how weight is affecting their health.

Love that you tackled this! And I just heard of Phoenix and love her. Looking forward to this conversation!

Pain, internal and external, comes with being overweight. Also, shifting to a mindset of gratitude for what my body does for me each day and what I gain in ability with weight loss and proactively working towards stewardship of my life in a Godly way.

Thank you so much for this timely, loving, understanding, and well informed talk beloved ladies. ❤ Being a Christian woman who has struggled with weight and the popular image all my life, I have been bewildered by the overcorrections in both directions. Fat people should not be shamed nor called disgusting, because we don't know what each person is struggling with, but neither should we be celebrated for this changeable physical feature/ issue than can actually threaten our lives. Both extremes are unhelpful and unChristian. Some in opposition to the fat-positive have made me almost more sad/ frustrated for the young one's learning from it. I know who I am in Christ, and I am being renewed day by day, but some young people are being driven away from help by the vitriol.

I got your cd! It was a gift to my wife and we love it!!!!!!. Thank you for all you are doing!

Thank you thank you thank you for this discussion.I have been asking God to show me the truth about my weight struggles,and up comes this podcast!I need to take responsibility for my sin,and ask God to guide,support and lead me with knowledge about how to handle the rest (such as the root causes).Like any other sin,it is a lifelong thing to discover God's will for us.

I agree with Phoenix! This is a good video! It is the over correction of everything! It’s ridiculous! The stupid entertainment business plastering Lizzo all over the place. Sickening!

Great episode! Thank you, both!

This is such a great video.there does seem to be a freedom for others to comment about people's appearance. I have been teased about my short height all my life. It does suprise me how people seem to feel it's funny.

I love that God loves and gave his life for us regardless of what we look like, but only the person inside. When we are called home, we're only going to be given crowns based on our life and how we lived it, not anything else.

Dear Alisa, I downloaded your EP "Beauty From The Ash" last week, and I LOVE IT! I have been listening to your podcast for a few years now, and I know you have a pleasant speaking voice, but now I know you have a beautiful singing voice as well! BTW, I actually have a Zoe Girl CD from about 2003. I don't remember its title, and I haven't listened to it in about 20 years! LOL!

Eating what God calls good is very healing🙌❤️🙏

Thank you, Pheonix, for speaking about a deep problem in your life. Im glad to hear a core problem that a fellow brother in Christ is having because it shows me Im not above you. I sin too, you sin too, I am with you as we sin yet Christ is in us despite our disobedience

Great conversation.

Can you do more videos on how to overcome an eating disorder?

Thank you so much for this episode! It is nearly impossible to find any sort of reasonable discussion about this issue in the Christian community. It is summed up perfectly with “fat-shaming is bad but fat acceptance isn’t the answer”. Yes! It is so hard to find that balance and swing the pendulum too far one way or the other. I’ve struggled with my weight a long time and I’ve ranged from self-loathing to hating everyone around me for not finding me attractive. My biggest struggle was waking up every morning and holding every bad food decision I’d ever made against myself. I was already defeated before I ever got out of bed. I am slowly learning to accept God’s forgiveness for decisions I made about food in the past. I don’t have to face each day carrying decades of bad food decisions on my conscience. If you are struggling, be kind to yourself. Holding on to all of your bad decisions and sinful behavior with food will do a great job of making you believe you are out of time to change and that there is no point. You aren’t out of time, and God is the point. Also, I love you.

No one gets “addicted” to meat and vegetables. It’s not food that is addicting, it’s sugar/ carbs.

I would tell a friend who struggled with drugs and alcohol that I too, as an overeater at that time, was sinning in the same manner as he. Both of us were not looking to God fully for our comfort and help. The church, imo, has not touched on gluttony efficiently in the US, where it's a problem, and has almost swept it under a rug. I will grant you that other sins can have greater consequences than gluttony on earth, but it's still a sin. Covid opened my eyes to our medical system (it's not about our health for one thing! ) and our food system. My Mother died at my age and her mother died a few months older so this age has concerned me since I was 26... I'm 58 currently. At age 56, I found a functional medicine doctor and I've lost 25 pounds. Not working at all on getting thin... working on getting healthy as heart disease and cancer both are massively in my family history. I've found better health through intermittent fasting and not purchasing processed food. So yes, processed food actually does make you crave it more, it's scientifically designed to function that way for profit! So now, 2 years in with my new doctor, food as fuel and medicine is finally becoming more of a habit and reality for me. There is freedom from food, there is hope, and there is freedom. But realize that a whole system for profit wants to keep you a food addict because you continue to purchase the processed food AND that will make you a "patient for life" on their medication until you die. Once you see the system for what it is, it helps to fight to break free. 🙏🙌

The fruit of the spirit is self-control, not a body type. 😊

Same for me!

Beautiful!! 😻

I'm 25 minutes into the video and I look forward to finding out if they talk about Lipedema. Whether or not they do, how many people watching this video have heard about this condition/disease? It's different from Lymphedema, but if Lipedema progresses to include a Lymphedema component, then it's called Lipolymphedema. Comments, thoughts, is anyone else familiar with this?

Thank you so much for this episode! As a plus-sized person concerned with her health, it has always bothered me that our community is so focused on being body positive to the detriment of health and common sense. I get that we shouldn’t body shame bigger people, and that some people are just larger but still healthy, but there doesn’t seem to be a balance in how the world views weight today.

I have dealt with both sides of the weight issue. When i was young before age 25 , i was only 89 pounds on my wedding day at 21. I was so anxious and had ADD with a fast metabolosm. Yet i heard whispers i was anorexic. I never dieted or thought i was fat. Yet hearing the rumors bothered me. Now im 54, weigh 142, on a healthy diet coming down from 153. Im five feet tall and obese. I was eating tons of sugar the last few years due to stress and i did not turn to Jesus but to food. I have repented of idolatry. Jesus forgives. And the Holy Spirit helps me stay away from sugar. I went on Paxil at 25 and i gained a healthy weight for the first time in my life. However food became an addiction by 2019. One day at a time with Jesus walking with me.

Thank you for having this conversation. Here are some of the thoughts and analysis I have come to while wrestling with God about my body obsession. I agree with Phoenix the reality is body shape is judged quickly and inaccurately and power and esteem are given to fitter thinner individuals on a whole. I have come to a place to accept this general reality. But I also recognize this is not a biblical worldview in operation. It is a broken worldview so I am not going to try and operate within it. What is the biblical worldview? 1 Cor 10:31 at Alisa mentioned. Before I eat ask myself: does this glorify God? Before I exercise ask myself is Gods glory the goal here? Also what is a biblical definition of health? I believe a biblical definition of health would be to live as optimally today in what I eat, how I exercise and sleep to make God look great and to allow my Holy Spirit in me to operate in a God glorifying way. For example if I exercise a little bit each day I find I sleep better and have more energy to do God serving things. If I consume lots of sugar if feel sluggish and then cannot serve God as well.

Some people DO display their pornography addiction by wearing t-shirts with "Playboy"or

Yes, fat oppression has been a thing, but as more and more of our society becomes over weight it seems to have changed.

I played with Barbies longer than my friends, because mine were acting out the signing of the Magna Carts, etc. 😃 But Barbies are for children, so it seems gross to immediately jump to sexual attraction. Maybe I'm confused? My Mom was built like Barbie. When I was enough to wear her prom dresses, the front fell down. When my "front" fit, the rest of me didn't :0) Vive la difference!

It all boils down to focusing on the spiritual rather than the physical (Rom 7 vs Rom 8). When we keep doing that, God will take care of both.

I don't think these lifestyle (eating, smoking, sport etc) issues should be addressed from the pulpit on Sundays. When the Word of God is preached (2 Tim 3v16) on a Sunday, it should take care of all self control, discipline, new creation, walking in the Spirit and not the flesh, issues. Use a week night to address lifestyle issues.

The problem with the new body positivity movement is the glorification of fatness and taking it so far as to discourage and even demonize weight loss. I've been morbidly obese for most of my life. I know the struggle. It's good to not be looked down upon for my size, but don't tell me I shouldn't lose weight and get healthier. That's just crazy.

Thanks for this and Phoenix you are so right. There is no equality and no "command" works to find everything equally beautiful, as the Barbie film wants to convey. No woman who has experienced the disadvantages of not being counted among the beautiful ones and feels different herself will be satisfied deep down. Body positivity is self-deception and yes, rebellion against the lack of chance of being able to be like those who are or seem to be truly beautiful. And this inequality of opportunity remains no matter how much style advice, diet, exercise or surgery someone does. There is natural beauty that comes through, like in your case Alisa, when you get healthy (PtL!). And there are just less beautiful ones who can never achieve it. This is pain. And what bothers me then in Christian women's groups is this: "We are all beautiful!" Actually like in the Barbie movie. Dear women, that is no help, that is a negation of suffering! What would be helpful? I'm so with you, we need detaching certain things from appearance. Intelligence, talent, position, being lovable... for example, and then please deal honestly with things likeing extremely overweight and the reasons behind it (and there is a lot!), which were mentioned. And finally help those affected to stopp this fight and accept the differences.. And how about God "We should be grateful for everything including our bodies" But for some parts I'm only grateful for the function and not for the appearance. And I think God understands that! I have to "discuss" my dissatisfaction and envy with God from time to time and otherwise I hope for my perfect resurrection body.

There's also an intestine flora issue.

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What was the book that you referenced in this episode that you both loved?

I think the Body Positivity movement is rooted in Critical Theory, seeing fatness as yet another oppressed category. However, I thought I was honoring God when I lost a lot of weight. It wasn’t until regaining that I realized how much idolatry (body image, ability to restrict, excessive exercise) and misplaced identity played a role. I also didn’t understand that ignoring negative emotions doesn’t make them go away. So after years of weight cycling, and covering every eating disorder, I finally stopped looking to a diet to solve my problems and sought counseling and help with eating disorder recovery. I walked faithfully with God through all of this but he lovingly allowed me to learn through painful experiences. Our physical body is only a portion of our humanity. Addressing weight issues by focusing on the physical body, which is what diets do, clearly doesn’t work long term. Combining diet programs with scripture or shaming fat people as sinful and lazy is misguided at best and really lacking in compassion and cruel. I know God will use the pain for his glory. I thought God had called me to help others get healthy by losing weight but was frustrated as this pursuit kept getting sidelined. But now I realize God prevented me from leading others to unhealthy thinking and behavior. Now I’m healing and trusting that God will show me how I can serve him faithfully in my right now body.

I don't care if I'm "represented" in the fashion industry (I never looked to them for validation). If I want to overcome society's predetermination of me I will have to work harder and longer to "prove" my worth/value. It's something I accept. But, it's built a resilience in me I never would have had if I weren't obese, and this virtue has strengthened other areas of my life as well. So what if I'm relegated to shopping in only 1 or 2 stores which offer clothing in my size; so what if I have to work twice as hard for that employment opportunity and continue to prove my value while I'm there; and so what if my doctor offers me sub-par medical treatment by choosing to blame just about every health issue on my weight and/or instantly dismisses my own evaluation on it -- these things have simply afforded me a greater inner-strength, determination, resilience, perseverance. They've taught me much about myself, and have driven me to depend more upon God. And, I'll never come up empty, disappointed or sorrowful for having cast myself upon God's love and care!

Can you link the Cross examined podcast episode about the Barbie movie? I could find it on KZfaq or on his podcast.

What about those;like myself whom has had/now battling an eating disorder.UNDER WEIGHT IS JUST AS MUCH A REALITY FOR MANY OF US,YET OVERWEIGHT IS MUCH MORE CONSIDERED,GIVEN SUCH A HUGE ACCEPTANCE! WE are to accept those;whom overeat,that's ok? While ED'S are a mental problem,we don't just have this,its in need of more attention!

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It's good to talk about this issue, it seems more taboo than even issues of sexual perversions. A few things that would be helpful. One, don't excuse the majority of the problem (diet + activity) with the special (medical) case. Second, don't pretend that your freedom (Romans 14) isn't unwise, especially when it comes to respecting your spouse, and stewarding your life and witness.

There was a lady who lived nearby who had left her husband with some comments about abuse. She had excess weight and ate a lot of junk food. Then she had 2 mRNA vaccinations. 2 weeks after her second one, she started having heart problems. Now she is having lots of visits to her doctors and can't work. So, are her problems due to the divorce, the Covid vaccinations, her diet, or something else?

I just watch a "pastor" insult his congregation (which seems to be a regular thing) by telling them that they were too fat and most had gain at least 15lbs so in December, he putting them all on a diet. He promises wealth and prosperity every sermon but they are in the same condition. If they don't respond with "Amens", "shouting" or dancing, he tells that they aren't really saved.

Loved this talk ladies! I’ve been convicted too recently about just the quality of food I’m putting in my body. I haven’t struggled with weight, but I have some eating habits that will haunt me as I get older. Not only that but I have a dear friend who struggles with infertility, she’s now on such an intense diet to make sure she’s healthy for pregnancy and I have easily gotten pregnant and I eat Cheetos. Just makes me feel yucky and I need to listen more to God and have the desire to please Him above all else- truly caring for my body and being proactive with Whole Foods and nutrients that are good for me! (So this talk about gluttony isn’t just for the overweight! Some thin people eat garbage too!) god bless!!

As a thin man who stopped believing in the Sky Wizard, I'm slowly beginning to get used to fat people after years of wishing and hoping the SKY Wizard would do something to help these people lose weight.

We can use the word fat of course it is in opposition to skinny, however, I tend to use the word voluptuous, because we find in the Renaissance they tended to paint voluptuous women, because they had a more artistic value, I have seen women who are voluptuous and they are also very curvy, all overweight women are not necessarily without Curves, also beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and you can have a stereotype beautiful woman but I will never go near this one because to use a vernacular character wise she's a bich, or rather can be, and you can never have a meaningful relationship with a woman like this, the relationships which work have to do with the character of a person,

Fat shaming is wrong, but so is telling people that being extremely overweight is health for most individuals. There is a very small minority of people who are very heavy who carry their weight in subcutaneous fat (under their skin and not around their internal organs). Most overweight people have visceral fat and fat in their livers and pancreases. That is long-term an early death sentence and a life of becoming increasingly ill and feeling horrible. For most people, they would be wise to go on the keto or carnivore diets. Some people will do better on low-carb vegetarian or fish-only diets, but vegan diets are not healthy.

This is a relevant topic. Your discussion was insightful. However, I did not hear either of you agree that gluttony is a sin. 1 John 3:6 tells us that no one who abides in Him keeps on sinning. Is there a difference between the sin of gluttony and other sins? Phoenix does not want to be judged and says that it is no one else's business. She says that her weight should not affect her message of apologetics. However, if we insert any other sin into the equation, then it would definitely have an effect on how the message is received. For example, if you were in an adulterous relationship or otherwise engaged in sexually immoral activities, then yes, I think it would and should effect the way people perceive your message. You say that the weight you carry now is a result of previous activity. The same could be said for a woman who is pregnant outside of marriage. Her pregnancy is very visible, the event occurred in the past... but if she were preaching/teaching, isn't it fair for her listeners to know that she has repented and views her sin as God does? I think the same should be true of gluttony or any other sin, especially for people who are teaching, who are called to a higher standard. We always want to default to finding some other reason for obesity, but let's face it, most of the time obesity is due to overreating. Diabetes doesn't always cause obesity, in fact, many Type 1 diabetics are very thin. Instead, usually it is the other way around, eating habits and obesity contribute to developing diabetes. Yes, there are other issues might contribute to obesity, like thyroid issues, PCOS, etc. However, these are minor contributors in the obesity epidemic as evidenced by medical literature. The other issue I didn't hear clearly articulated is when obese individuals justify their size by saying they are comfortable with themselves and therefore it is not an issue for them.

Enjoyed the video! I had a eating disorder, years ago. I/we will never do it perfectly, only Jesus did. A book, Thin Within a Grace - Oriented Approach by Judy Halliday R.N and husband Arthur Halliday M.D. is scripture filled win for everyone!!!

Counseling should not be from the pulpit. Full stop. Seriously, there is no need to say the word porn from the pulpit. Hello, there are minors in the audience who don't understand the word. So if they Google it, bam another porn addict may be porn.

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