I happen to live in Nebraska- my husband is an essential employee then comes home everyday to our three children. We are scared and pissed.

Well Mr Colbert. I watch you on you tube because I don’t have cable. I work in mental health and addictions. I’m an essential service and I look forward to coming home and watching your show. Thanks for helping to keep my world sane.

"Nothing says 'Never Surrender' like a Confederate flag." Hahahaha, so true!!!

I laughed at the Michigan protesters, but then I saw they were literally blocking the ambulance entrances at hospitals. Like, ambulances? Real emergencies can't get help because your roots are showing?

'Why start asking for consent now?' Brilliant yet Poignant.

"Here a test, there a test, everywhere a test, test." LMFAO. Go Stephen! We LOVE you!

That guy getting choked up that he can't buy paint and grass seed is the ultimate retiree.

"Who are you gridlocking?" Well, as it turns out, they apparently blocked ambulances access to a hospital that was in their disruption area. Idiots.

Someone asked "Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?" Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England, wrote this magnificent response: "A few things spring to mind. Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem. For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace - all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed. So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief. Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing - not once, ever. I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility - for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman. But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is - his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty. Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers. And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults - he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness. There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface. Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront. Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul. And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist. Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that. He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat. He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege. And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully. That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead. There are unspoken rules to this stuff - the Queensberry rules of basic decency - and he breaks them all. He punches downwards - which a gentleman should, would, could never do - and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless - and he kicks them when they are down. So the fact that a significant minority - perhaps a third - of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think 'Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that: * Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are. * You don't need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man. This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss. After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum. God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid. He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart. In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws - he would make a Trump. And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish: 'My God… what… have… I… created? If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set."

That picture of pro-Trump protesters in Ohio looks like it came out of a zombie movie.

“You don’t need testing” Trump University Motto 👍

I don't know why but you got me at "Dr. Fridge Magnets" Good Luck from Germany! :)

He can’t read! Watching him sound out words is so painful! This man child can’t read!!! 🤦‍♂️

9:15 -- That guy holding the Confederate flag is aware that Michigan was on the Union side, isn't he? 😕

I feel really sorry for the next President who inherits this joke. The messes they are going to have to clean up and fix. Geez

"Cant buy fertilizer...c'mon" *breaks down crying*

It's sounds like reading makes him tired.

"It's a scam what they do" You mean how you and McConnell cared more about appointing your picks for judges over your cabinet picks? For 3 years... Yah, total scam.

I wish he would learn to read. That monotone voice when he tries to figure out "words". Better yet, stop the damn min rally and let the Dr's take the lead.

I adore this man so much- I can only hope one day I'll get to thank him for all the smiles and laughs I've had because of him after this crisis ends (if ever)

I cannot wait until he is out of office AND in JAIL. I am so sick of listening to him. So tired of it.

“You can’t buy lawn fertiliser” that guy is in tears for lawn condition?

Americans have reached such a level of complacency and comfort in modern times that we have no idea what true human suffering is. The people crying foul because they've been confined to their own devices for a few months are pretty much declaring what a shallow husk of a person they truly are, and that the only thing that gives them any purpose in life are menial, superficial maintenance tasks.

I don’t believe a damn word President Trump says.

I'm longing for a near future where this deadly virus no longer will be a threat to the world. And how I wish for the coronavirus to disappear, as well.

Wow! Those Trump supporters were practically in tears because they couldn’t go to the hairdresser, or buy paint or lawn fertilizer? And I thought they called us the snowflakes 😂😂

"The pig says oink. I'm hearing that from a lot of pigs" hahahaha amazing!!!

I just started watching your show. TY! I was laughing so much that I actually forgot my sadness at this ordeal. You are great and just what we need right now.

How do you know there’s only a small amount of cases in that state...? State: We’re not testing ergo no problem!

Gee, that farmer MacDonald in Iowa has the right idea. “Here a test, there a test, everywhere a test-test” is EXACTLY what we need, Trump should listen to him.

9:15 cause nothing says American patriotism like waving the flag of traitors... 🤮🤮🤮

This is the nightmare everyone was worried about. Trump being in charge during a crisis.

"Here a test, there a test...... everywhere a test test" Omg that pause

With the social distancing deniers, ignorance really is contagious.

10:10 That guy gonna cry so hard about his lawn fertilizer while it's SNOWING on him

“Why start asking for consent now?” FIERCE BURN 🔥 🔥 🔥

The protesters always look like I imagine they would

“We’ll fight the virus. You keep screaming into the hairbrush.”🤣🤣🤣🤣

I'm not an American citizen but I watch as much as I can find of your show on KZfaq. Thank you for keeping up the show -- and the morale, I hope --! I know that sometimes it's hard to keep calm during this pandemic... I appreciate that you appeal to what is needed right now; common sense! Thank you, Stephen. :)

This guy is literally crying because he can't be a good little consumer-bot and go shopping. WTF!!!

This show is kinda like "Mr. Rogers w/Bourbon & Friends" now. I dig it.

nothing says "no surrender" like a confederate flag :))

Stephen Colbert looks handsome when he’s all dressed up in his suits, but he looks even hotter when he’s wearing a casual button down shirt.

8:34 Looks kinda like those zombie movies where they're trying to get in and feed.

Stephen, you've been doing a lot for morale ever since election day 2016, and it means even more now.

If he’s gonna talk about Iowa he should at least know that our state has several hot spots with over 2,000 cases and 4 meat packing plants that have had to be shutdown, several long term care facilities that have been affected and a incompetent Governor.

I’ve never seen Tiger King.

"We've passed the peak" and the numbers still grow. Wow!

Donald, please stop dropping, “The American People” like you actually care about us. It’s embarrassing for you and your actions speak even louder than you do when you see an honest reporter.

That guy almost in tears over his lawn and that lady complaining about her hair are pretty pathetic. Seriously.

“Just put 2 and #2 together” 😂🤣😅🤣💩 💩

8:34 looks like a scene from The Walking Dead

So if you don't test states with low cases, how will you ever know if their case number grows?

Fun fact, our region of Iowa now has a shelter in place until April 30th. So Trump has no idea how Iowa is doing.

If I ever get stuck in a douchey gridlock, I'm going to start Operation Flat Tires and Broken Windows.

Don doesn't like it when there's a scam he's not invited to...

"Scam..." "hoax..." "fake..." Can we expand this man's vocabulary??

How have you passed the peak “nation wide” when you haven’t even had the explosion in some areas?

Im so glad that I don't have to live in the US. VOTE BLUE

Who is out there giving a "thumbs down" to Stephen Colbert's monologue? Right now, 390 is the number next to that icon. So, people who hate Colbert are watching Colbert? Why? So that they can stoke their love for the Duplicitous Tyrant? Or maybe it's folks who think that Stephen is going too easy on the Prez? Just curious.

“The peak” is the start of the downturn, yes. It’s also the moment at which the situation is at it’s absolute worst.

"A dereliction of duty that the American people cannot afford" also describes Trump's administration, and in a broader sense his business strategy.

Brilliant. Your squirrels are working just fine Stephen

He doesn't care about anything but himself. Medical person should tell him he is corona positive, we can see how he freaks out, also him being isolated things may work out right.

Don’t ever stop Mr. Colbert. Your part of my strategy to get through this, and have been since 2016.

That lady's roots are an easy 3 months grown out. She should've worried about it in January

"I'm hearing that from a lot of pigs." BAHA

Hillarious! Have to be honest... Best monologue you have had for a week...

FFS, those protesters - one dressed like he wishes he was in the military but crying about his lawn, yes, his lawn, because that to him is so much more important than other people's lives.

The Lunatic in Chief's deranged daily rants just keep getting more and more unhinged .. Every day brings a new level of BAT$#!+ CRAZY !!

That old McDonald bit was hilarious 🤣

I wished Stephen and his team could here my laughter.

Every time the show cuts to Trump talking, I keep hitting the skip key so I don't have to hear him talk

"Who are you 'gridlocking'?" I'm sure there were a few medical workers trying to get to work in there somewhere.

I was in a grocery store and saw two pretty college student-looking girls, without masks, were shopping. A little old lady, at least 70+ came up to them and asked why they did not have a mask on, don't you have a mask?, and started digging in her purse, I think to offer them a mask, but one of the girls looks down her nose at the kind old lady and says "I'm not at risk, bitch." The book covers looked nice, but the content was swampass.

Your writers are soooo amazing! I am laughing so hard!! 😆🤣👍🏻

Oh no they can't get their hair done what a travesty no country has ever faced such suffering cant you see they cant survive any longer....

"22 million Americans have lost their jobs, unfortunately Donald Trump isn't one of them" :D

News from Australia We have developed a test that tests a whole city with one test We will be happy to sell this test to America The rest of the world gets it for free

"Lady flag screamer and guy in a purge mask." 😂

8:35: Aaaaand, there you go. Zombie apocalypse. It finally happened. There are the zombies. Trying to break in and eat your brains. Because they have none. And WHOA do they look spooky.

Over 2000 people died everyday in the US and people are concern about having their hair done and their lawn looking nice. 'Merica.

I LMAO @ Old Mcdonald bit! 😂😂

@0:08, I can relate.....I did the same thing at CVS, asked the store clerk if they've seen a sunglass I might've left on the counter, didn't know I was wearing them on the whole time! LOL

I genuinely hope that every Drumpf supporter does their due diligence, and inhales the coughs and sneezes of every noble American around them! God bless them, every one.

God Forbid your lawn goes unsightly while lives on the line...people are effing crazy

Just wanted you to know that you were SPOT ON with this content!! You didn't heard them but the laughs kept coming!! LOVE!!

That New Yorker bit was great 😂

We do appreciate your doing your show. It helps keep us sane. Also, it's the only way I can keep up with Trump's speeches. I need humor and commentary to be able to stomach them. Thank you!

"Open before the deadline." Let that sink in...

LOL best " your Mama " joke in a long time! :D

This one was a great show indeed Stephen. I have to say this 11 minute bit had more zingers and laugh-out-loud moments than any of the previous quarantine videos have. Great job to The Late Show staff writers. 👏🏻👌🏻👍🏻

When Stephen says "you got to be nice to your mother. LIKE I WAS LAST NIGHT!!" I thought about the fact that his only cameraman, now, is one of his sons. Made me laugh more.

“Some say with almost none” lol, reminds me of “you have 15 infected people, and in a few days that number is going to be down to close to zero”. This guy just doesn’t get it. At all. 🤦🏻‍♂️

Hahaha! The New York bit - ‘be good to yer mother - like I was last night’.

Don't worry about if you're getting through. I'm alone watching this and I laughed out loud right through it. Many thanks - and keep it comin'!

I truly think rapid testing should be available to all people, whether experiencing sent symptoms or not. Also, it's important to note 2 things at minimum: 1. even if one tests negative, that does NOT mean s/he can never later be infected, and 2. Even if one successfully recovers from Covid19, there is NO absolute immunity from re-infection. There is more unknown than known, and there are so many models and projections but only accurate, thorough and widespread research, time, individual and collective responsibility and mitigation efforts will tell. We must be mindful, prudent, patient, compassionate and Loving - living out these attributes will have a significant impact in this situation and in life in general. Peace Love and hair grease ✌🏼💖💕

“You can’t buy lawn fertiliser”. It’s snowing. And you’re a veteran. So, you know. Grow up.

Stephen man you light up my day. Even though some people are funny I just smile at their jokes, but with your show I laugh out loud and bang on my leg. This staying at home every day thing, it's hard: you make it bearable, even fun, although reality kicks in soon enough. Thanks man, thanks a lot.

the old Mac_Donald part though literally laughing out loud.