“Nobody outside should and can meet our inner needs. It’s an inside responsibility.” 💜
@SerenityBirth14 жыл бұрын
I agree. Am just having trouble seeing that as a "Mirror"? Has it is a mirror if the person leaves you for their own false needs?
@tanielumalae22942 жыл бұрын
😍
@satyasahoo89942 жыл бұрын
@@SerenityBirth1 oiioop the best to call
@MrKayakka Жыл бұрын
Romantic love is an industry
@harshvaishnav43635 жыл бұрын
1. Dont marry to external appearance , marry to INNER TRUTH. 2.💡Cant expect partner to change. 3. LOVE should be selfless & 4. Unconditional
@amasion28824 жыл бұрын
Harsh Vaishnav 1). Marriage involves sexual/romantic relationship which is partially based on physical attraction. 2). Change -desirable or not- is inevitable. In a household people should expect reasonable accommodation to keep relations comfortable and peaceful. 3). Love is unconditional. Relationships are not. Both parties in healthy marriages understand this.
@leahkmarshall5 жыл бұрын
Love this: "There is no such thing as heartache. We think its heartache because that’s how the mainstream characterizes it but really it’s the ego and the false self being released so both people can evolve. It’s the inauthentic self being let go from the inauthentic relationship. The other person couldn’t see you for who you truly are and you couldn’t see them for who they truly are. True relationships, where you both see each other for who it is you are, always endure. Their form might change- the people might go from lovers to spouses to friends, but the relationship always endures."
@deborahmartin54105 жыл бұрын
Leah Marshall beautifully said ♥️✨
@nicholaskevin16985 жыл бұрын
This woman is just pure authenticity and brilliance! And I think the way she eloquently puts out her wisdom on this whole relationship topic might be my favourite. There's the shift in my life right now which coincides with the shift that I'm experiencing from this talk. Thank you!
@ElizabethLizPerez3 жыл бұрын
I learned that everyone changes at different paces. I learned also that when you free yourself from expectations of things and others you free yourself from expectations of others
@yogithashetty25874 жыл бұрын
Dr Shefali speaks so eloquently, intelligent and wonderful, I feel her presence and her great energy 🙏🤗💕
@Vera-dg3hf4 жыл бұрын
Pre-marriage counseling is extremely important. You can determine if you really want to marry or you have issues to work on. Relationships are hard. Marriage is harder because you’re making a conscious choice to COMMIT and WORK together with someone else. Real Love is rare.
@TheVeek1923 жыл бұрын
Real love is NOT rare.
@tamannatazz58003 жыл бұрын
I agree with you
@SerenityBirth14 жыл бұрын
Amen. That's right! Nobody on the OUTSIDE can meet your needs. That's why the person leaves you then repeats the same elsewhere.
@Delgado-ot4lq4 жыл бұрын
She is such a brilliant and beautiful woman!🙏💜
@ricardocarlitos4 жыл бұрын
she is a fucking frogface!
@jahmallajaima4 жыл бұрын
Carlos Millan What is wrong with you!
@rosasendon29074 жыл бұрын
Dr Shefali, you inspired me a lot for being so brilliant & articulate. Thank you for sharing all your knowledge esp in Conscious Parenting!
@ramanaraoa54094 жыл бұрын
@@ricardocarlitos People look but look not face. Something else is also there.
@ramanaraoa54094 жыл бұрын
@@jahmallajaima General saying is ' face is index of mind '.
@AD_23144 жыл бұрын
“Heal your inner child.”
@newbeginnings15434 жыл бұрын
The only unconditional love comes from God, and mom and dad. Romantic love always has an extreme amount of conditions attached to it!
@rabouala4 жыл бұрын
Lisa ODierno yes.
@nonsoville4 жыл бұрын
Only for women dear Lisa. Men love unconditionally.
@Sgn-bd3ki4 жыл бұрын
Yes this is absolutely true. A relationship between adults needs the mature and active participation between the parties involved .
@bestdancer83953 жыл бұрын
Nope. Parental love is conditional.
@TheVeek1923 жыл бұрын
Bullshit. I have unconditional love for and from my siblings, my nieces and nephews, and several close friends.
@richeyrich22035 жыл бұрын
I really feel the quality of this talk would have been better if your guest had their own mic and audio levels were adjusted and equalized. She is hard to hear with volume cranked up.
@jeannie725 жыл бұрын
Richey Rich I agree especially when the louder advertisements blasted in.
@akovacsrealtor4 жыл бұрын
I can see she's actually mic'd up. (upper right corner of her jacket) Unfortunately technology sometimes fails us :-) I guess by the time they realized the mic was not working, there was no time or opportunity to rerecord the interview.
@krainey4 жыл бұрын
The audio is fine to me
@angelamooremusic4 жыл бұрын
@@krainey her voice is at the same volume as his to you?
@psmylife68323 жыл бұрын
@@krainey bearable, but definitely not fine. Hr lapel mic isn't working (may not be on, battery dead, etc), and her voice is being picked up through his mic
@courtneysmithtriathlon5 жыл бұрын
She is brilliant. Love Dr. Shefali! I saw a post of hers on FB at a time I was struggling with my child’s behavior. Her message was my “a ha” moment and really resonated. Her message about love and partnership is equally as wise. I learned last year that true, unconditional love means total acceptance of your partner while loving yourself. It allowed me to heal and hopefully allows my now-ex to heal as well. Great interview, thank you so much!
@onixinternational80934 жыл бұрын
What is aha?
@humanityandme4 жыл бұрын
@@onixinternational8093 an ephiphany
@hildasegurabelmont38114 жыл бұрын
When you release expectations you free others and yourself! Thank you for this amazing reflection!!!
@mortonvrose4 жыл бұрын
Thank you Dr. Shefali. You are making a big difference in this troubled world. Namaste.
@bapsymcdowall9574 Жыл бұрын
God's love is ultimate,unconditional..We have such stories, some couple living in false world,most of them are suffering from inside,what's the meaning of this partnership,marriages etc..
@EMuro-wu7uy2 жыл бұрын
I’ve been working on myself since my spouse died. Everything that was said is so true. I am starting a new relationship with more open eyes, and the difference this makes is phenomenal. It is freeing to feel this way. I’m evolving into a better person. My expectations are very different, my hope is this new relationship works, but I will continue working on myself first.
@MkurunyengoMkuru4 жыл бұрын
The consciousness in Dr. Shefali ALWAYS BLOWS MY MIND
@normasaunders28164 жыл бұрын
Going through the situation right now and it confirm thats what i should do ..free every one .no expectations..just give love..coz what you give is what you recieve
@shubhadakumbhar92745 жыл бұрын
I loved this podcast. Each and every word of Dr. Shefali is liberating. I am experiencing that when i be my authentic self, i release the need for anyone to fulfill and complete me. Its a freedom for myself and for others as well. I can then see, accept people and situations the way they are. Its truly amazing.....thank you Jim Kwik and Dr. Shefali for this wonderful conversation. Looking forward to meet u both in person some day.
@andreagonzalez36805 жыл бұрын
Shubhada Kumbhar come to her event evolve in october... life changing. www.drshefali.com
@Essentialoils4ujess-weagle4 жыл бұрын
I'm relearning all of this in my Al-Anon program. Tough hard lesson that I couldn't control another persons choice to drink! We each have our own Higher Power.
@iknowwhatsup28804 жыл бұрын
Everyone's trying too hard and not being authentic. Every person you date isn't "the one"! You should just enjoy it as it is and enjoy it as it goes.
@ClaudiaSanchezQuintero4 жыл бұрын
c Nomor Well That person could be but you don’t necessarily know that from the beginning. But that person will bring you closer to the one or the next person who will take you closer to the one. Etc. Not everyone finds the one in high school because we all have different lives. It is okay. Just keep moving forward and learning and growing
@ghenwaaz55604 жыл бұрын
For the ones who are having trouble hearing Dr.Shefali, try using earphones or headphones for this purpose.
@singh.h42004 жыл бұрын
I agree I cannot heal another person they can only heal themselves
@lisar28012 жыл бұрын
Shes brilliant and she's beautiful
@vaishalitayade10may4 жыл бұрын
What a wonderful learning. right away I drop expectations coming from mind and let me see if I it heals me and evolves me.
@bapsymcdowall9574 Жыл бұрын
Human love is temporary.Thats the reason they keep pet dogs and cats..Being present is a gift of life...
@marcwareham93514 жыл бұрын
You need only 1 thing in life and relationships! It’s self esteem!
@ClaudiaSanchezQuintero4 жыл бұрын
Marc Wareham Yes! Believe that we are good enough and believe that we are worth it and we are lovable.
@jennyquezada96445 жыл бұрын
I lover...Thank you for teaching me to be a better parent Dr. Shefali👏🏻
@leannguyen48604 жыл бұрын
I love the idea that it’s up to each in everyone of us that decide or influence the moment of our own awakening ; and also the idea that we think we have the ability to control over others and make them fullfill us and others are there to fullfill our inner insecurity from the childhood are irrelevant. :) . And once we have free ourself out of the thought may we truely heal the soul, fill the inner peace, be happier, and start to help others if it meet our soul’s need and possible :)(I think)
@KT_5714 жыл бұрын
Gosh, I admire Dr. Tsabary's wisdom! She's absolutely brilliant! What a phenomenal teacher.
@ycztzskl20044 жыл бұрын
I was looking at the comments just to make sure that my ears are fine and every one has the problem with the sound. Now i am relieved that atleast some of you felt that its low volume. 😊
@muhumuzabernadette11224 жыл бұрын
free yourself from thinking you can meet other peoples emotional needs
@hannahsaurusssx33 жыл бұрын
Her hair is so pretty.
@pacibaco4 жыл бұрын
People are not requiring others . We are all able to function alone at all times . Society , songs and movies all falsely pressure us to manifest into fake irrational relationships. This is a brilliant easy talk ... Listen to it multiple times if needed
@AyubKhan-qx2sd4 жыл бұрын
Seema ANAND is the best storyteller in her smart and beautiful Expressions .I've ever seen. She is so captivating with her stories! she is a very intelligent woman in her deep thoughts . She is a very high thought provoking intellectual woman in her deep thoughts . She is a very talented and well articulated woman in her deep intellectual approach and an expert on Narrative Practices in her professional way . I Like the way she has been expressing AND TALKING ALL ABOUT her thoughts in a brilliant way .Thanks
@scyalla51512 жыл бұрын
Dr. Shafali, you spoke nothing but the truth!
@edwinaclaremolloy95552 жыл бұрын
Being BRUTALLY honest with self- ( & transparent with others) We r not meant to change all at the same time - we evolve when we are ready - let go of expectation- - -freedom for everyone to be themselves
@lindaliao2546 Жыл бұрын
Very deep and insightful EdwinaClare! Namaste!
@mialinnik95185 жыл бұрын
very wise woman ! Insane knowledge
@veenasharma14404 жыл бұрын
Thanks Dr. Shefali. This was wonderful eyeopener.
@ericwilliams6264 жыл бұрын
Marriage today is about power. Today when you live with someone, you become their employee of life. My dog does this with his ball. I am there to throw his ball. That is my existence for him. He means well. But a partner doing this is completely uncalled for, but today, that is the reality. People just use each other, not love. Forrest Gump knows what love is, but most Americans do not. But they do know what power is and they have it over on you.
@franciscoiramossalinas65494 жыл бұрын
All pickup artists teach you. The way to a woman's heart is to show her you are the strong dominant one
@franciscoiramossalinas65494 жыл бұрын
@Corrie exactly sucks that it works
@franciscoiramossalinas65494 жыл бұрын
More than that, it is everyone's responsibility personal and social to find the tools needed to carve a world full of happiness and """""spiritual freedom"""" full of respect etc. The fact that there are so many in this mindset is a direct reflection of EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US and disregarding any of it says as much of us than others
@trevorfrayne64183 жыл бұрын
Big haha is that what destroys relationships is believing someone else will complete you, meet your needs, and that you need to control someone else. The controlling I already got. Helpful advice for someone who is still single.
@angelavictoriagutierrez27985 жыл бұрын
I love the vid. Dr. Shefali is a stunning woman who knows her craft. Thank you so much sir Jim!
@newbeginnings15434 жыл бұрын
Why be in a relationship if you don’t need each other or you don’t meet each other’s needs.
@rabouala4 жыл бұрын
Exactly. This is textbook wisdom that the therapist herself can’t emulate in her own personal life. If there is no such thing as failing relationships and heartache, then why are we created to be communal and in relationships and why does a baby rely so much on safety, consistency and love? We have lost our way so much that we need to define pain and failing marriages as something positive. God forbid we accept we have failed and that it fuckin hurts.
@Mrs.T3054 жыл бұрын
Exactly that's where I'm confused
@toluk12584 жыл бұрын
Im confused as well. I understand where she is coming from and tried to relate it to my situation in which the guy isnt communicating. Her advice is basically you shouldnt have expectations as people are human and you shouldnt need that person to meet your needs. But then relating this to my situation the guy im talking to communication sucks and i cant build that emotional connection with that person. So i will have to end it as they are not meeting that need. But she is stating they dont need to meet our needs. So what standard do you set for people you want to be in a relationship with. I do feel i can meet someone needs... as a little effort goes a long way and making a conscious decision to do something for someone you care about isnt that hard. If mothers with kids have this mindset we would have all grown with with our needs not being meet because the excuse of being human would be valid as well as human should expect other humans to meet your needs. The video made no sense to me.
@msteriousone80153 жыл бұрын
@@toluk1258 I really liked the book "if I'm so wonderful, why am I still single?" She answers these questions and that makes a lot more sense for people who want to be in a healthy reciprocal relationship.
@louisar4227 Жыл бұрын
No one can truly meet your needs but you. And when we are healthy, we don’t “need” anyone emotionally, rather we come together with others in the present moment because it’s authentic and not driven by any thing else (like the ego).
@jennyquezada96445 жыл бұрын
Be a Truth Seeker👈🏼💪🏼
@blisswkc33444 жыл бұрын
Thank y’all so much dearest 🌹 Y’all such an inspiration 🥰 Be Blissful Eternally 🙏😇🌈
@fatboyannie4 жыл бұрын
I am so glad I came up of release my husband the responsibility of being my husband. Our relationship is not change but I am happier knowing we cannot have a healthy relationship if he cannot be his true self. This validated my choice is not crazy.
@scottpine9786 Жыл бұрын
This was very insightful
@alicjarysart4 жыл бұрын
The title of this video has nothing to do with the conversation out there. Should be more why there are unhappy relationships or why relationships fail. Dr. Shefali Tsabary is amazing, love her!
@EMuro-wu7uy11 ай бұрын
My parents love was very conditional, not unconditional, and many people do not believe in God or gods. We were taught wrong. I was always told: don't be selfish, don't do this, don't do that, don't be competitive. These are wrong on so many levels.
@zazass46684 жыл бұрын
Can you please make a video talking about the good and positive side to marriage. The positive side that will encourage men and woman to appreciate the Beautiful of Marriage rather then feeding into the negativity. The more pple read and watch negative things about the marriage the more pple will expect that. Seriously what u put out there is what pple will observe and expect.
@learners_channell3 жыл бұрын
Such a joy to listen to ur talk
@waqqarahad87624 жыл бұрын
The sound is tooooo low
@vanessaevans87854 жыл бұрын
This is fabulous... Thank you Dr Shefali ♥️
@kathy28884 жыл бұрын
This is exactly what @the.holistic.pyschologist has taught me too. Consciousness!
@NafSlaveOfAllaahАй бұрын
Bismillah and Alhamdulillah As Salaam alaikum brothers and sisters ❤!
@leighb90864 жыл бұрын
She is so amazing
@novapaola4 жыл бұрын
She is the best!
@journeytoloveparis4 жыл бұрын
It fails because you get advice from people that are not happily and passionately in love with each other. If you understand and practice unconditional love you shouldn’t have a problem being in a relationship.
@ratnabhatt60953 жыл бұрын
Beautiful...just amazing
@Sgn-bd3ki4 жыл бұрын
While self awareness and working on self is ONE pillar or relationships, there are other important things involved. Read about Spiritual Bypassing if you've been reading into spiritual teachings for a while. Will save your life and keep your safe from toxic relationships otherwise hidden under "I can't receive love until I'm healed, it's all a mirror, can't expect live until you love" misunderstandings.
@gregoryarrindell5 жыл бұрын
What was it she said again??? Her beauty is deafening :)
@deborahmartin54105 жыл бұрын
Gregory Arrindell so true ♥️✨
@dimple_music4 жыл бұрын
Haha I completely agree, she is beautiful!
@bridgetedwardsmentalhealth4094 жыл бұрын
Pity they didn't do a sound check before recording this. She's the main speaker and should be wearing the mic, not Jim.
@boooootch4 жыл бұрын
Looks like she is... maybe it failed.
@robertohernandez28244 жыл бұрын
Thanks guys.
@nanditapastariya91362 жыл бұрын
Love is unconditional. But relationships are conditional.
@1ddlj4 жыл бұрын
Madam Shefali's voice is similar to Madam Esther Perel.
@mariannegtner4 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the wonderful content!
@lindareese45794 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing....
@mithughosh34 жыл бұрын
Superb video...loved it shafali...nd also learnt a lot from it
@scottwillimack1843 жыл бұрын
Amazing thank you!
@millavanillia11013 жыл бұрын
This is so fascinating. However the more I think about it I wonder: What are relationships for and do we even need them and if so what for"? Not coming from an attack point of you but as a part of the conversation and a fundamental question. How should we look at relationships to avoid the old way looking at them in terms of what the other person has to give/provide you.
@Uthiop3 жыл бұрын
She mentioned it beautifully at 00:01:00, to see how we yet have to grow and heal our selves. As spiritual leaders teach it's a journey in life to express and experience who we really are
@madeleinemariameriwether4 жыл бұрын
This is brilliant
@sandygarcia74355 жыл бұрын
QUESTION????...Great topic...what book would you recommend for a 16 year old teenage girl to learn to love herself? Self healing...tfs...continued blessings...🌻🌻🌻...
@jennyquezada96445 жыл бұрын
Shadows Before Down: Finding The Light of Self Love Through Your Darkest times By: Teal Sawn
@andrewhaywood38534 жыл бұрын
Don’t say to yourself anything that you would not say to anybody else. Low self love often comes with critical inner dialogue. So imagine with everything that you think in your head, that you are saying it to somebody that you cherish, maybe a very best friend, a lover or a future child of yours. The important thing is would you talk to them like you talk to yourself in your inner dialogue? If you would never say such things to someone you care about, then don’t say them to yourself! This should help you to weed out mean or negative thoughts that you have about yourself, and help you to learn to nurture yourself.
@downhomegirl54 жыл бұрын
So you say, I don't live my Truth & then you Become the truth you say you are. I guess LOVE is a illusion that we create in our own heads. I never met a man yet who hasn't disappointed me. Most of the time it's about their wants & needs even when they act like they want to help you, it's always about what's in it for them. Is this saying true love doesn't really exist? Love yourself.
@dianakhvan33325 жыл бұрын
Dear Jim could you please reupload if it is possible this video with better audio quality as for not native speaker like me I can barely hear Dr Shefali. Very important topic btw thank you
@laurab98675 жыл бұрын
I totally agree.
@janinegomez67065 жыл бұрын
I agree.... Poor quality of sound
@jacquelineharris64074 жыл бұрын
Release expectations Conforming to the ideal
@JohnSmith-vw2zd5 жыл бұрын
Where is the links to her website? There are none here under your video Jim Kwik
@leahkmarshall5 жыл бұрын
Here's the link to Free to Be, her conscious relationships course. I'm doing it now and it's mind-blowing! drshefali.teachable.com/p/free-to-be
@lauranwokocha45025 жыл бұрын
Dr. Shefali Tsabary
@PaulineMitchell4 жыл бұрын
Very good episode!
@naancy463 жыл бұрын
You inspire me
@NaturalEarthTones5 жыл бұрын
Thank you 🙏🏼
@lkasjddasjlk43502 жыл бұрын
Shes stunning
@t.h.nguyen51933 жыл бұрын
I can't hear Dr. Shefali. What happens to her voice? I think the mic is not clipped on properly. I read the transcript. She is right on. I believe we must learn to heal our past before planning to commit to a long term relationship and before having children. Everything will come back tenfold.
@Milnjed3 жыл бұрын
Is there any way for this woman to be more stunning?
@iamenough69584 жыл бұрын
God forbid they GROW and change
@franciscoiramossalinas65494 жыл бұрын
Relationships are about power
@rahulthukral93339 ай бұрын
Mutual gratification
@bothlalephawe40223 жыл бұрын
Whole episode?
@ziggypip2938 Жыл бұрын
Where has she been all my life?!?
@00calimon3 жыл бұрын
I wish they would test and adjust the mics better. There was another video where the guest's mic was good, but jim's was quiet ( located away from his mouth). Here, it's inverse, her nic is weak, and his is loud n clear 🤔🙊🙉
@veramann2 жыл бұрын
The sound from Shefali is low.
@antilaw99113 жыл бұрын
My love for my now ex is still unconditional. If she gets fat, I still love just the same as always. She can't read my mind.
@user-qp6vg9ho8u2 жыл бұрын
Usually when the man runs out of money
@user-oj3qv5xd4n11 ай бұрын
How do we heal our inner. Selves
@shamvu5 жыл бұрын
What about live Q&A that will be better but should inform earlier. ..
@krainey4 жыл бұрын
You didn't post the link Jim
@yshkviswanatham1724 жыл бұрын
Why should more relation ships fail why it is fail when you are in teenage your desires more then you are taking with teenage girl teenage boy other family what they are doing any one knows no it is created problems then fail your relationship s
@veenasharma14404 жыл бұрын
The audio was bad . Please improve it.
@Rai461493 жыл бұрын
I think it’s the opposite of what she says. The child is so accustomed to getting everything he wants, parents always doing everything for the child. When he gets into a relationship his expectations are so high.
@dianakhvan33325 жыл бұрын
Symbolic number 108
@CScripture4 жыл бұрын
Sooo what is the purpose of marriage then sounds a bit anti relationships not everyone can heal
@Sgn-bd3ki4 жыл бұрын
Yes and there's never a "you're done" point. Pretty spirituality does not directly apply as simply put into real relationships.