That's a giant leap. Well done! 🤩

So proud of you!!

You've earned my respect. Please, from here in out, whatever you do, please(and I'm literally begging you) please don't look back and give second chances. Please dont. You've gathered the strength to walk away. Its only forward movement from here. Wish you luck 🥰❤

YAYYYYYY! for YOU!!!!!!💕💕💕

Hugs

I think it is from the pain of it being empty and disappointing like going to hug a hologram. It gives the impression of being solid and real but it is not.

@@RB-gv2yh Thanks.

I feel this. It's the loss of the dream.

Yes ! We're grieving a family member and they're making him out to be a mystical unicorn... they get angry when I say he was just a grumpy horse.

@@x-mess LOL I'm no expert in the best way to handle grief, but I love the way you expressed that. In fact, I think what you're talking about would be worth a video, at least.

Don't sleep with anyone until you're married. Until then, cutting and running is way too easy for the guy. Our ancestors had it right all along.

@@lumpyspacecadet i dont think sex is a bad thing before marriage, despite i was raised in religious family.... of course, sex with consent and safety from both partner....

@Paul Gauthier some people fo have dark sexual needs, which is so detached from normal norm, i see a lot of unhuman sex act, but they use prostitute than talking to their own partner, of course normal people definitely scared and run with those weird sex act.... i saw those videos where they had crazy act while having sex, modern people are very dark dude, geez..

PROUD OF YOU!!!

@@AdelleRamcharan Thank You!! All of the special insight & guidance from your videos has helped immensely as well ✨

Thanks for listening! -Cara@TeamFairy

Amen!

Therapists are no help at all with dating issues, or female bullying narcissists at work. Years later I listen to a couple of coaches on KZfaq and find out all this dating crap I endured was intentional on the part of the guys. They were not at all “clueless”, they were manipulative.

I feel you. I find it hard to emotionally detach from people. My thoughts become almost obsessive. I’ve come to realise that time is a healer when splitting up with someone. Even though the pain is so raw when a split first takes place, overtime people like us will be healed ✌️

glad you realised this so young honey. Big Hugs from Australia

It’s been two years for me being sick about a break up. I cannot wait til that feeling is completely gone, along with the fantasy I’d hoped for. It is dissipating, yet slowly. I didn’t have time for such.

Great you found out early, sounds like you've got good insights. I wasted 15 years knowing it wasn't good for me. I'll likely never have another relationship, at 63, there's not much point in trying.

@@katiekane5247, I would change that conclusion if I were you. Good relationships can begin at any age. Don't starve yourself if it is based on automatic beliefs and programs. Your words and thoughts are more powerful than you know. Choose them wisely. If you find ideas that don't serve you, delete them. Give them over to spirit. They don't own you. You're the master of your mind. I wish you a happy life with healthy warm relationships! 🙏✨

Praying for your complete healing. God loves you . John 3.16

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. It's a great reminder that change and growth is the greatest gift we give ourselves. I'm glad to see you feel at peace.

Thank you for an incredible testimony of healing. You are most loveable. So few people ever get to learn how to love themselves in a lifetime. I would love to hear more about things you did to come by your peace, to realize you were not a failure.🙏🏼 Only if it pleases you. I believe there are so many things to die to before we leave our bodies. Respectfully, I salute you. ❤️💪🏼

❤Sending you lots of love💕💕

You should feel pride for your healing. Glad you made peace with the real light that you embody. It's not on your temporary skinsuit😉 and 55 is still young. You win after all 🥰 well done sister. May you carry the peace into eternity 💕🙏🏼

Yeah, if the guy were interested, he would have asked her out for coffee and dinner during the training. But you still have to be wary in these situations that take place everyone in a fantasy for a few days or a week. He could have been cheating on his wife if he took her out. There’s a reason he didn’t do anything in front of his colleagues, and kept it secret in cyberspace.

It's new for me too, and WOW! I never knew it even had a name.

Dr.Grande did videos and I think he may have used it in his video on types of love. Also it's brought up in books on infidelity and the recovery from it. You can see it all over.

Me too. It is like a key that unlocked a lot. I was rewatching a romcom type tv show i was into years ago with lots of longing and complicated relationships. I realized so much of that was aggravating limerence for me

@@KoreaMojo I haven see those

I havent heard about interesting before either, very interesting... It happens to me a lot🤦🏻‍♀️

Same story as yours.

I’ll never date online/ long distance again either.

I Agree! No On line dating No Out of State! I’m ✔️ Done

Thanks for sharing! -Cara@TeamFairy

No thrills Chapman

Marco is a professional player who benefits from situations like this.. sadly there's tons of creeps like him out there and our quick microwave relationship crap game is making it so easy for these predators. They are hunting for sex. creeps!!!

@@lovearttherapyalways "Quick microwave relationship crap game" is such a great line!

@@Captain_MonsterFart thanks... sadly this is how our society rolls nowadays... everything quick which just does NOT work. God bless you!

I’m trying my best to make peace with the idea that I’ll be alone for the rest of my life. Every marriage and relationship I ever witnessed growing up was filled with pain, abuse and sorrow so, there are worse things than ending up alone I guess. You’re not alone. I’m sorry about your experience.

Same.

I'm 45 and I could have written your comment.

Did any of you know as a child that you would be single in adulthood?

Romance is a scam. Better to accept that sooner than later.

Intense story, thanks for sharing it and thank goodness you are feeling free again! -Cara@TeamFairy

That’s what Tinder is for- people who just want “hookups”. You went looking for that and you found it.

@@genxx2724 i don’t think she went there to hook up , man and maybe some women uses those dating apps just for that , when other women like her she may dudbt know the real porpusse masked those apps are … man there lies and acts in diff ways that inexperienced vulnerable good women gets trapped !

@@lizzetcastro73 Tinder is for people who are just looking for that. It’s not for dating.

@@genxx2724 yeah , see like me i didn’t know , i tought was a dating app is it shows clearly is just for hooking up ? or is just masked as “dating “ and man as usual takes advantage , well i found out there is women who also looks just for sex , but not my case i just can’t separate feelings and just being sex casual ?! how they call it now days …

Thanks peace to God. Amen 🙏

Exactly why I want an age appropriate companion. Someone who knows what a (nearly) 60 y/o woman is suppose to look like (I'm keeping it real) and has the same ebb and flow as moi. I'm not looking for a lover per se. More of a companion. Sex is second or third rung. Cheers, sister. :)

Yes! Holy crap you literally described the story of my life. Lack of effort is such tell tell sign. It's so hard though to just move on. Ugh I hate relationships. 😑

“Single mom” or divorced? It’s not the same thing. Mothers have no business dating casually or having sex outside marriage, subjecting the kids to your emotional roller coaster. The only focus belongs on the family. Children are suppose to be raised by married parents who are emotionally secure and stable in love, and focused on the best interests of the kids. You had your time to date around BEFORE you had kids. Now you owe them stability.

​​@@genxx2724 noone asked you 🙄

@@genxx2724stop- it’s hard to believe you are a genXer you sound like a boomer. women can do whatever they want and whatever they are comfortable and is healthy for them. Mind your own business. It doesn’t matter if she is a “single mom” or “divorced” - that antiquated mindset is thankful dead now.

Precisely! -Cara@TeamFairy

You got $5 I can borrow?

@@donpeace894you got 10 I can borrow?

That's how young people end up being raped, kidnapped and murdered. How can one be snowed by someone through social media, long distance? Especially if they've never met in person?

@@amber40494 loneliness and isolation

@@lunasea4309 yes, you're right, I didn't mean to sound callous.

We should create a directory of these men! They prey on women like us.

So sorry to hear you went through that

If a man calls himself shy - he's hiding something and pretends to be better than he is and might be hiding something dark.

@@Wiggy8 thank you for your kind words ❤️

No where to be found because perfect people do not exist. It's just another lie to keep yourself "separate" from the world.

There are a few out there, no doubt, but I think the ones who appear to be that are often femme fatales, who treat men like they're lucky to be dating them. Man-eaters! Men (perhaps nicer ones) often fall for that sort if they have 'The Mother Wound'.

I love your comment! As much as I appreciate the resources, I do think all the self work universe makes us feel like there are these perfect women out there.

This was me and I got zero friends so kinda suckssss

Everyone hates my energy but I’m walking on myself to become better

Hope you are feeling better Tshego. 🌻🌟

I'm so glad you're working on the triggers! Have you come to our peer led Daily Practice calls yet? We'd love to have you. -Cara@TeamFairy

Thanks so much for the supportive comments :) -Cara@TeamFairy

I know the feeling! -Cara@TeamFairy

I know right!!

kick her to the kerb if she's not 100% into you.

You got this! I know what you're feeling, and it sucks. Be brave!! And best of luck to you. 😊

First thing you gotta do is stop putting people on pedestals. Describing Anna's videos as "divinity" is over the top. They're just really practical and helpful videos not the burning bush of god or whatever

You don't have to do it alone, we have a membership full of support courses.crappychildhoodfairy -Cara@TeamFairy

The overgeneralization part was not right on my part. Still, the writer tells us about the "indifference" that she felt in person - and, in hindsight, it doesn't make sense. I mean, it was Marco being smart & cunning but to feel that either this distance or the sudden online interest is out of character is so important. And we, limerents tend to explain it away and blur the immorality of the actions that are right in front of our face bc we get attached too quickly. Marco is a wierdo and has the characteristics of cowardice (not real shyness/awkwardness, I agree, not at all) and the goal of minimal involvement - plus, has widespread experience in what he does, it seems. It's also common for limerents not to be able to fall out of one episode until there is another one, or, at least, a back up option - so far, I haven't really seen a real solution to that problem.

Yes. Why didn’t he step up and ask her out in front of his colleagues? Because he’s not single, that’s why

She is working on it :) -Cara@TeamFairy

Thanks for listening! -Cara@TeamFairy

it's important to acknowledge that not everyone is interested in deep connections, some people might never have any deep relationship ever in their life and thats their problem not yours ...and it's great that you are aware of your tendency to codepend. Keep a note of what triggers that and notice when your codependency is triggered and have a 1st aid plan in advance on what to do when that happens. :)

@@lunasea4309 yup. i have BPD. so i know and pretty much aware of my codependency. I've noticed that most people who talked to me told me that they needed time to grasp what i was saying and they also said that i wrote lengthy messages. i didn't realize it if i wasn't told. Oh i have ADHD too which makes me overspill things sometimes and i would get upset when it's not reciprocated. My thinking pattern isn't always linear but like "spider webs". I like talking about many "deep" things, like psychology, philosophy, dreams, life, sometimes science, and i'm both thinker and feeler. I value honesty, logic, and rational thinking. But sometimes i'm too consumed with my emotions and be blinded by it. So i couldn't see myself when my BPD takes place. But i value their honesty though, when they said something like, "honestly i'm not interested about that", "sorry i don't understand what you're saying". That's easier for me to handle than with people who are trying to be "polite" but suddenly they ghosted me, deleted me, blocked me, while in my head i already "assumed" they are into me, interested in my mind, and wanting to develop deep connection with me. I realized that i might have assumed a lot and not seeing things organically. I often ended up feeling unheard, unappreciated, misunderstood and they left me with a bad taste in my mouth. This pattern happened not only twice but way too many until someone, few days ago, gave me a sudden epiphany about my online relationship (not always in romantic way but relating to people in general). Oh btw, i noticed you edited your comment bcs i saw something like, "there's no shame in expecting people to be genuinely interested in us..?". Well, tbh my expectation has given me so many delusions before, sadly. Instead of seeing thing as it is, i made some "scenarios" in my mind which are not always true. I used my "intuition" a lot (like this video mentioned) and made ugly assumptions. But in the other hand, i got what you're saying though. It's really hard to find people who are in the same wavelength. This time, I'll just let it happen (if there's any) and not dabbling with my "intuition". 😅 Thank you for your comment, thank you for the reminder that it's not my fault if they're not interested in me.

@@serenity_in_reverie hiii I have something similar…. If you want to talk lemme know I’m here -!!

@@adatbh thank you for the offer!! i appreciate it Ada! rn i just do a lot of self-help and trying to be self-sufficient 😅 i mean, i channel my energy to write! wbu?

@@serenity_in_reverie Yess This is the best way of healing and detachment!!!…. Been putting my energy in my studies

I'm done with the fake shy guys.

Yes bring alone sucks for sure

This! 💯

Long distance is perfect for idealism and limerance

I am going to preface this with the woman of whom I speak purchased a "manners" book for her nieces and nephews and offered up $1500 to each of them if they could get through the dinner per "the rules". Each rule broken meant $200 subtracted from the $1500. Sad to say, but her nieces and nephews turned it into a mockery and walked away with little to nothing. So, this woman "dated" another man in another country for three years. Both highly successful professionals. She said after they broke up, (paraphrasing,) "Anyone can be on their best behaviour and "perfect" when you only see them every couple of months." What pushed her over the edge and to break it off was that he had the audacity to push his peas onto his fork with his finger! I'm serious. She broke it off that night and high tailed it back to Canada the next day and never looked back. I laughed, but she has standards and sticks to them.

@stephaniejames6672 This is so true. Currently in long distance limerance situation and I need to remind myself of this. Matt have to screen shot your comment to save.

I agree it's same with me and that's why I believe anna when she says that if someone really wants to be with you they'll make it clear

So true I just kinda self isolated

You're definitely not alone. Glad that you're spending the time to heal. We're cheering you on! - Ashley, Team Fairy

oh you are virtue signalling with " I am vegan" no one cares! You are putting your health at risk.

@@jenrich111 a drinker would say she is virtue signaling saying she doesn't drink. stop being judgmental for no reason and let her heal

Thanks for throwing Abby some love :) -Cara@TeamFairy

Usually two a week are letter writers :) -Cara@TeamFairy

Glad you like them! -Cara@TeamFairy