That's brilliant of him to notice a connection between the accumulation of small emotional damage and burn out at work

The thing that pisses me off about money is that it's such an absolute wall to our potential and the thought of that eats away at me- I will not be able to learn XYZ cause to learn it requires monthly fees in the hundreds (sports training) and I spend the time accumulating that money and decide "nah I need to save it for emergencies" which seems to be happening more and more.

one thing i just want to suggest for anyone that struggles to process their emotions is to be mindful not to THINK your emotions. feeling our emotions is a process that we should be experiencing in our bodies, if you notice you are going round and round thinking things in your mind when an emotion comes up, try to ask yourself what you’re PHYSICALLY feeling. i have memories of crying and kind of holding my body and saying out loud like, “just feel it, just feel it, just feel it.” it’s our inclination to want to avoid those negative feelings, or to get it over with as soon as possible, and it’s so important that we properly address what’s happening internally. and that’s done not through analysis, but through a surrender to the psychological experience emotions bring. it takes practice but you can do it! 💕

I know exactly how she feels at 3:43. Any amount of work was draining. The environment associated with working, the pressures, expectations etc. all just felt mentally draining. Going to an office for even one day and having to put on a face was exhausting. It wasn't until I found a WFH job that didn't require ANY social interaction aside from a meeting every 2 weeks that I was content with working again. Its honestly was the dream job for me and not many out there that accommodate like this.

This was SO RELATABLE. Thank you for this interview. It's funny because watching this I was like "Oh god. This is so frustrating to see her over-intellectualize everything. My therapist is a saint for watching me do this for months"

Is it just me, or did anyone notice how tired Snow sounded, crying from being overwhelmed, not able to fully process more information, but asking more and more questions and loading herself with more information and emotional burden instead of taking a rest? Oh, my poor girl.

My observation about Snow is that she's conflicted about the numerous objectives vs the numerous subjectives. Her mind races off topic much like mine does because there's so many branches of contemplation and so many different avenues to walk, and every avenue has some negative consequences. And its easy to find connection between avenues and lose direction and accidentally lose train of thought. It's hard to keep track of it all.

Man money has crushed my mental health soo much that it's made me deathly afraid of any debt. 23 and made it this far with no debt, only thing that was iffy was a er visit.

omg snow, if you’re reading this thank you for opening up i on stream. i related to you SO deeply to your story from the struggles with burn out to difficulty processing my emotions. thank you so much for calling in this really helped me feel less alone! 💞

90% of my problems (which lead to anxiety/depression) could be solved with 40k today. unfortunately I am blind disabled and not even allowed to have more than 2k in the bank or I lose my benefits uh merr ick uhhhhh

Snow, if you see this, thank you so much for asking about this. It honestly feels like I was there asking the same thing with Dr. K. From not knowing how to process my emotion, insecurity with money, burnout, thinking about career change, over 90% of things mentioned are what is bothering me for a long time and especially recently. So this has been extremely helpful for me. And thank you Dr. K for helping both Snow, myself, and so many others on how to tackle each of those issues.

27:30 When Snow started crying, because she was being understood by Dr K. I really wanted to hug her and tell her that everything is gonna be fine, poor girl. I really hope she's gonna do much better

This session and the recent "I Hate Every Job" video helped me gain clarity of how to move forward in a better, healthier more sustainable way since I have the same problem of being completely burnt out after a series of bad jobs and the irrational feeling like I never want to work again. Learning burn out is actually 50/50 gives me hope going forward since there is a lot I can do around future jobs such as setting limits and boundries, communicating better, etc...

A talk on emotional processing would be huge. Thank you for everything Dr K.

this person is exactly me and if you relate too, it's a sign that things are going to get better for you. We're infinitely closer to finding our own answers and all we have to do now is just keep moving forward and the answers will come to us. wish whoever is reading this all the damn best and don't ever allow yourself to believe there is no way outta whatever you are in right now.

Dr. K hit the nail on the head on this one but I don't believe she haven't grasp meaning of the conversation. She's definitely insecure and looking for an easy answer to solve her problems. She's relatable but her mindset makes it hard to listen to her and I definitely would be blunt giving her advice. Thankfully Dr. K is a professional.

Oh man I see similarities in her situation to mine. It’s both a feeling of relief with sense of belonging and an crippling awareness of seeing another person with the same situation which makes me either sad and/or depressing at the same time I wish i hadn’t live and be born because I hate myself and living situation

Surprisingly, this may have been one of the best discussions I've witnessed yet. Her extremely serious, analytical approach to figuring emotional processing is something I heavily relate to. I remember the first time I heard Dr. K talking about noticing and acknowledging emotions but not giving in or suppressing them. Reminded me of that Dr. Strange quote "I control it by surrendering control? That doesn't make any sense." He's totally right, though. It's like it deflates any power the emotion had. Meditation is a great way to 'exercise' your ability to have strong awareness of emotions without ruminating on them - just acknowledging and moving on.

Snow I hope you don't beat yourself up over some of these comments, but I just wanted to say that this session REALLY helped me. I relate to you about burnout and processing emotions. I was taught to suppress my emotions growing up, and yeah it solves some of the issue temporarily, but it comes back even stronger. I've never even thought about emotional processing being an issue for me. This really shed light to how I got burnt out from work and my relationships. I've been doing it my whole life thinking that's just me being an introvert, but I now acknowledge the next steps to a more healthy relationship with others, which will in turn, make a more fulfilling life :D

"Sometimes when you get close to emotionally processing, you actually look for some kind of regiment or solution to do it instead of actually doing the work. - Right on the cusp of emotional processing, your logical mind actually takes over and says, " Give me a logical plan to emotionally process". And the moment that happens, you move away from emotionally processing.

When Dr K told her that it's okay to take a break because we need it, I actually started crying. It feels so liberating to get comforted like that.

I hope this girls finds peace. She sounded really robotic and actually disconnected from herself- burnout, anxious, rationalizing, anything but just being present. Just needs to learn how to sit there and feel, maybe she wasn’t allowed to growing up. If she doesn’t fix that she’s just going to keep trying to solve red herrings like “is my job the problem? Is my saving a problem?” And create more problems to solve. There are lots of people in jobs they don’t like that are stressful, who are big savers who live fulfilled and otherwise peaceful lives.

Thank you snow, this is also what I struggle with and you brought it up to light. Very informative

dude I can relate so much. What I personally could relate to was the relationship with money. I worked one year and while living at home, I only spent like $100 a month and invested everything into the S&P (which couldve taken a happy ending but I destroyed all progress when my dad died and literally just deleted the money). I still finished the year full time and took home 10k. My biggest desire is to just take a break. I feel burned out since grade 10, being literally forced to learn french by my parents, the mental strain was the worst I have experienced until now when I was forced to learn when I didnt want to. Every day that I am at home, I feel a sense of dread and can never relax, either because I constantly get taks either by my parents or from life, which I am unable to keep up with, which in turn make me get extremely angry and frustrated in my head when I get the smallest taks like take out the trash. I just want to relax, recently I went on vacation with my friends and I felt so at peace, happy with myself it was incredible. Now I am back at home and I feel anxious and feel like I am very stressed. Maybe I will use the money to move out and finally get to relax, my "adhd symptoms" also dissappeared when I am seperated from home, but man why am I so scared to take that step

Loving this new interview format, its cool to hear the back and forth

This is similar to my money brain. I won't buy clothes because they cost money even if all my clothes are ripped up.

I was going through a similar issue with money in the sense that I was feeling the pressure of spending too much or not knowing whether I am spending enough and just having fear that I go out I'll just let myself go and waste every penny I managed to save. What I started doing and has really worked out for me is to start tracking where my money goes in an excel file, for each month I have a table with everything I buy and the second part which really helped me reduce the pressure was establishing budgets. Then the watchdog, as Dr. K calls it, started protecting me when I would go over budget. But everything that was in the allocated budget was ok. I still had to convince myself on what the appropriate budget would be, mostly with things like "I keep saving money for this thing that I never do/buy, so I'll just allocate more to other areas and when I'll finally do that thing I'll adjust the rest so that I can do it". Basically make a clear limit as to what is ok to spend for particular stuff (food, games, music etc.) and then you will start to get stressed when you are beginning to reach that limit, but not before.

For some reason, the topics covered in recent videos (past 2 weeks) have felt mostly relatable to my mental issues

Idk why but I have felt so alone in this, thank you so much for talking about this snow. These videos makes me feel a lot better about the way I am and feel

This is kind of unrelated, but if anyone has a resume gap they are in the middle of, and if you can afford to, volunteering is a great thing to try, you can get experience in a different field, and you can meet a lot of interesting people, all while keeping something on your resume and getting good references.

I had a lot of the same feelings towards money but Buying a used SUV & turning into a 'vanlife' type of vehicle has given me a mindset of a safety net...I don't stress about money (as much), being homeless or the future

Thank you. I needed this.

ugh i just want to give her a hug. I feel her so much. I was in her situation some years ago when I moved out to LA and was BROKE. Not having enough money gave me full panic attacks and I was so anxious my life fell apart. I know that's a little different for her situation, but similar in terms of my relationship with money.. Very do or die.

1:02:20 I love this last section where you ask questions of an employer as an equal. Honestly the things you said would never have occurred to me to ask, in fact I would never have realised that I *could* ask those things of a boss. Dr K could you please walk us through some more scenarios and how to speak assertively and set boundaries in the workplace? I had an awful experience at a toxic emotionally abusive workplace where I was bullied by my bosses for four years which has scarred me considerably and left me terrified of returning to work 😓

As someone who struggles with money issues myself this conversation was very useful and wholesome.

Most of the advice about approaching your boss that he gave hasn’t been my experience over the past 12 years at 5 different work places (and before that with teachers also).

I can relate to this girl so much!! Currently having the same exact problem down to every detail!

Good video 👏🏽 many things she talked about really resonated with me.

This is something I think about a lot. Working for a company feels like I'm putting in far more effort than I'm actually being compensated for, and I personally hate working on private proprietary stuff if it's obviously avoidable. The work pretty much just goes towards lining the pockets of the execs and the company coffers rather than the real greater good that open source software, public research, etc. go towards. It takes a toll on my happiness no matter how good the rest of the company culture is. Unfortunately, the pay of private proprietary work is still so good that I'm making the decision to work in these areas anyway. I'm also a saving and index investing fanatic, so hopefully high pay + aggressive saving can eventually get me to a point where I can pursue whatever I want, and give my own kids the opportunity to skip having to sell-out their time at all.

This conversation made me admire the therapy professionals even more. I would never be able to endure conversations like that.

I think for both problems of worrying about being poor and not wanting to work, one can work on both, as it sounded like Dr K was saying that one shouldn't work on an emotion when one is in the midst of it in a general sense. I would just say first get precise on what the core fear is. Then, for the example of having no money, think of a plan in what one would do. Include doing practice runs on various levels of bad situations. Also, ask for other people's experience in being in that worst case, what the worst part of it was (which may be different from what one expects), and what they recommend to do and to avoid. For the example of not wanting to work, focus on understanding yourself , your past history in what you were good at. Focus on the principle of wanting to learn in that area for at minimum 5 years, of liking or being interested in something, as different from loving or being emotionally excited in something, where the latter seems much less stable than curiosity/enjoying learning.

I am trapped on the contemperative stage and preperation stages. I never commit past them.

what a kind soul

Wow. This is basically me except I've been struggling alot longer, am older and now at the forefront of the insecurity (my bank account is 0). Best to solve these things when you have a cushion otherwise you just end up draining yourself and lose all hope.

Quite an Insightful session here, made me realize i have a thousand more unrecognized issues on top of this money debt career issue present 😭 video was partially helpful .. might try the meditation... But will need more resources to deal with issues 😪

@49:58 I feel so attacked lmao I have lived all my life rationalizing and thinking logical at the expense of suppressing every emotion until a few years ago, and thought kinda thought I had anhedonia all this time. Though there have been moments when it was the case, I was mostly a puppet of my deeply buried emotions and I'm still learning to acknowledge them to this day

Most of you would be surprised but in my case the money didn't change anything. In the past I didn't had money and was thinking all the time my life sucks, now that I have money that feeling didn't leave, I still feel empty every single day and see no point in life whatsoever but somehow Im still scared of getting older and die someday.

I'm too broke to relate

I want that emotional processing curriculum.

what I was in therapy my therapist told me that there are two types of people who go into therapy a lot of the time where one person understands that there is a responsibility amongst themselves to regulate their emotions and their mental health and the other type of person is someone who doesn't understand that they have the inner ability to manage that themselves so instead they kind of think that there is an easy solution or that the the solution is outside of themselves and basically that they expect to have their hand-holded the whole time. I think this is the first time I've seen someone who is the latter and I don't mean that in a derogatory way it's just an observation. but great conversation about emotional processing and what that actually means

i feel this 100%

Love the title of all these videos

@42:20 Like it or not, the most terrible stories aren't told at all because people rely on their nightmare of a job for everything. They can't afford to even try to say what they've seen anonymously (because let's be real, who's actually anonymous anymore at any capacity. Riot Games just doxxed two female eSports stars for having a disagreement about teabagging on Twitter.)

She is just living life and learning and introspective. All the experiences together will soon add up, to something she’s learned. I honestly would always recommend to leave parents and live YOUR life. You will learn much faster. Don’t stay naive to the systems running us. Break free, to find self.

Can relate with the whole money thing, though I feel I got good balance with it. Ultimately the whole have to work in order to survive needs to go, in the meanwhile you have to be creative with it in order to find something that works out and that is difficult.

I am very much an idealist and need to majorly change my views on money and having to work for survival as well.

I honestly believe that money is both important and useless at the same time. Because of how it drives people with ideologies and how the system is being moved by it.

Dr.K's guide to emotional processing coming soon?? Poggers

Yes UBI would free up so much human creative and problem solving Capitol. Crime would go down. Our global problems would be solved because we'd free up all of the creative human Capitol to solve the problems because when you are in survival you are not using higher centers of your brain. You can't make good decisions unless out of survival mode

I think snow is my brain twin coz this is how my mind works most of the time especially with the relationship with money stuff.

Why do you follow the schedule and get nervous if you can start staking in Cross Staking?

If one is worried about not having being poor, one idea is to plan for a week or a few days to act like one is literally poor. One can go in stages, from giving up some costs or purchases to being completely poor. One can go to a soup kitchen, volunteer there, get to know and ask people what life is like for them. One can tell them that being interested in whether I can handle being poor. What are the pitfalls to avoid? What are the beneficial resources to take advantage of while poor?

youre a beatiful man for doing what you're doing

I know that feeling but I do believe if you have a plan, you can get out of debt sooner rather than later.

Namaskaram 🙏 God is with you, we are all nodes within Indra's net

Dang some of these comments are harsh. As Dr. K noted, emotional suppression is likely Snow's primary coping skill. This crippled her ability to deal with emotions in a healthy/strengthening manner. To me, it sounds like emotional processing is very difficult for her, and she is trying really hard to "logic" her way through her emotions/mental health in the most effective manner. Her issues may not be as bad as some other person's but she is clearly trying her best to be happier but needs help to be more natural about emotional processing.

Thank you Dr. K

I'm glad I live in a country with free education and other problems can take toll on my mental health 🙃

“Can you describe your feeling?” “I think…” That just give it away, bruh you aren’t feeling but thinking.

A buddy of mine's father in law has a huge Rainy Day Fund he never spends...

measure your cost of living what you can shave off, then find a job at that range which gives you work life balance also. i hop to a job that is in another industry, half my pay and i am happy. previously even though i earn more and can splurge on stuff but i am never happy. now i save everyday think about cost efficiency but am sleeping well and happy.

this is a random question, but does anyone know how to come on as a guest for Dr.K's videos? i find his advice super helpful and practical and i wanna come on and ask him questions lol

(Sorry for the rant guys, just have had a real shit last few years and every year seems to be worse than the last and these last two - three months have just been adding onto that). Legitimately what do you do when all the jobs you're good for just aren't enough? Like $15 an hr where I'm at just ain't enough to cut it and as much as I'd like to relocate elsewhere that's not financially feasible atm either. It's a moderately intensive/labourious job as well and having a second job just leaves me with less free time (so part of the motivation to make extra money would be moot) and much less physical and mental energy. Like to put it in perspective, most places around here require you make 2.5x - 3x the rent each month which for the cheapest place I could afford just simply isn't possible without lying on every application and good luck if they actually check. And god forbid you have bad credit due to ignorance, simply not knowing any better. And good luck trying to juggle attending College on top of having to work two - three jobs having 0 free time, hobbies or life whatsoever, that's definitely great for the mental health both short and long term (add on the likely debt you'll be paying off as well to make it even worse).

This whole thing but no savings.

i felt very related to this and also extremely confused

48:58 "If I don't let myself get too angry is that suppressing it?

This weekend I stabbed myself in the hand on accident. Instant blood pouring everywhere, and as I got dressed for the ER, I started crying. Not because of the pain, but because of the ER bill. Why can’t I just go build a cabin in the woods. Let me out of your money prison.

young adult getting to work for the first time here (its a disaster) god how I love money now you have no idea, I'm just like that duck character that had a massive safe with gold coins and he would swim in them God I love to get and earn money and I'm so happy that I can just do it like that at the same time, I just dont really feel motivated but that could be youtube addiction :/

Yea I kinda feel similar too.

She's so vague that it's hard to keep listening

I love how proud of Snow Dr. K looks for the 30 seconds or so when he asks what they think at 30:50 as he just sits their listening to them work through reflecting on their answer.

When I made 40k a year, I had no debt and lived great. Now I make $95k and am about to file bankruptcy.

"What do you go by, friend?" "I go by Snow" "Snow? *Cool* " I see what you did there, Dr. K

I'm surprised people can even finish these videos. It's taken me a couple of hours to get 9 minutes in. 10/10 relatable, I would probably benefit greatly from continuing, but jeez. Attention span is at an all time low for sure.

Alot of this sounds like Autism or Kryptopyrolle disorder. If you get burnt out dealing with other people's feelings even without even interacting with them, or if you feel inauthentic going to your workplace and that causes burnout, might be worth looking into an adult diagnosis. Money works in our favor but society doesn't, if that makes sense...

@41:42 Yaw, Naw, Dr.K is objectively wrong here. Most managers simply do not want to work their employees. But most managers are also not capitalistic. The real issue is, the majority of manager positions are middle-positions between the tonedeaf upper corporate suits and the employees working at ground level. They are focused on a balance of appeasing CEOs and shareholders while making sure employees have at least the bare minimum they need to succeed. Managers are usually so caught up in corporate BS, they literally have no time to think of a profit. And I would argue it's deliberately designed this way, so most heat that employees have falls onto managers so thr fatcats don't have to hear about it.

I really appreciate that Dr. K wears his expressions on his face. It would be very awkward if he wore them anywhere else and leaving them in the closet is just awkward.

Meanwhile me is worried with money, but don't really care about money at all and just want to make my dream true. So much contradiction I know.

she is brilliant

25:16 those facts that you are spitting

To anyone feeling bad: Thank god you don't live in Argentina earning in Pesos....difficulty of life spikes to +10000 this way.

The talk seemed very good because interviewer was coherent. And dr k takling for 10-20 minutes after alone makes it seem like dr k was on top Athena subjects and able to summarise outside of the two-person dynamics. What the F is that thumbnail? Lol.

if have the same conflict with money. i dont care about it at all.

She should be a nurse or something like that because you can make your own schedule I know burn out comes from The monotony of the everyday 9 to 5 grind for me so I have to get jobs where I can make my own hours which includes security nursing and some retail or delivery but you never get burned up because you're not doing the same thing and you can pick your own hours so you don't feel like you're trapped.

I was guessing she was asian by her voice LOL

clickbate title, but still good, thank you

Uptalk makes it very difficult to take anything seriously

I have the powers of batman and the networth of Spiderman

You wouldn't download a Lakshmi mantra

33:46 okay but what IS the work? i hear this word all of the time "the work" in regards to emotions, but i have no clue what it means. I feel very in tune with Snow and their feelings about money/work/therapy not working, but listening to this so far, it feels the same way i feel about how therapy has been for me as well