When you give them nothing to criticize, they’ll start inventing things.

Grey rock. Grey rock. Grey rock. You are dealing with someone who is hell bent on bashing you with their voice. Cash up. Get out if you can. In the meantime : Grey rock. Grey rock. Grey rock. You are being treated as if you are one, so adopt the posture of a Grey rock. It is the only way to survive until you can get out.

What are you supposed to really do about abisive relationships? Just separate? Cause in mine, the abuse is just a constant flow. I tried so many different things and just nothing ever changes. I'll be honest and sincere, kind, understanding and listen and I'll do so much but nothing ever works. It only stops if i just shut up and take the abuse

My husband literally thinks that it’s okay for him to point out every time I make a driving mistake, but if I will dare to say something to him then he can get enraged and tell me that the way I think like that is ridiculous. Why it’s okay for him to tell me but not the other way around?? Totally makes no sense!!! Unless it’s narcissism

Thank you for mentioning how rhetorical questions (20:20) can be used to blame you. I had a boss who used this strategy all the time. I couldn't understand why, but it felt wrong and it felt like abuse.

I feel like I should stay stay far away from people because everyone I come in contact with some form of abuse😢

Social media is destoying relationships.I do not do social media but I have seen many disaster.Its such a shame that people pretend to get along when in reality in fact is bs.

Thanks for giving both sides of the conversation I have been the giver and receiver in conversations with others. This strengthens my growth .Thank you

This was Wow! Thanks.

Thank you!!! thank you so much for bringing up rhetorical questions and I personally believe and I think from my personal experience from my mother that rhetorical questions can very very much be used in a verbally abusive way.

This is extremely well communicated. I’ll be watching you more.

Thank you for making this video ❤

Thank you! Very clear and understanding 👌🙏

Monika you are so knowledgeable and thank you for sharing.

Yep - "I do this for a living" response when you are discussing something that you need to talk about or have validated - the person cuts you off and invalidates your need to discuss something because your are 'less" than them.

Wow. That was fantastic

My dad was verbal and my mothers other husband vas emotional.So this became my norm.

My husband is verbally abusive. Any argument we have, he will break down my character. He even said that he will put me back in the gutters, where I came from. The gutters is a house where he often had a good plate of food and my parents treated him like a family member. They must be turning in their graves.

Relationships can be complicated when we don't put our Faith and Trust in God first, because we live in a fallen world and sin willingly. We should always seek God’s will in our lives and He will bless us with a suitable partner far beyond our wildest dreams!! Put the old beat up luggage down and grab ahold of the new!! Have a Blessed day!!💞

Very important that you said disruption works if not pathological narcissist or abusive. Boundaries worked with my Mom. With my partner, it escalated his behavior to where I needed police to help me to a shelter.

I see so many of these videos about abuse and bad communication. Do you have anything to teach people how to communicate the right way?

98% of what you said is exactly what my marriage is. I pray for God to set me free or change him, often!!

Gray areas in relationships: 19:26 rhetorical questions and what is appropriate. 21:18 shut down statements and a rejection of a genuine bid for connection. 22:42 judgmental comments disguised as neutral observations. 23:49 defensive maneuvers amd deflection 24:59 assuming bad character insisting a negative narrative about them 25:46 speaking for them assuming their intentions 26:26 sarcasm and digs 27:15 baiting questions aren't real questions 28:54 technicalities and cherry picking your partners arguments Intention is key. "Be clear." 31:01 summary Thank you.

Simple anything that is said to you that makes you feel less than period. Anyone that tears you down verbally is abusive always pointing out all your faults never having anything good to say tearing you down verbally verbally abusive.

I had asked for help from an immediate family member with an issue with some research and they scoffed and YELLED at me about not knowing a number that I don't look up every day - in a belittling way. They also closed the page they were on and I lost it and told them "if you don't want to help just say so" and hung up. It's been almost a year and they don't respond to my calls, ecards, non responsive to trying to make things right. The verbal/emotional abuse has happened before (Yelling). I still care for them but wish we could deal with this. Problem is I don't think they'd admit doing it. I shouldn't have hung up on them, but it was a reaction I couldn't stop as I was taken aback by not just the yelling, but the derisive tone and them x-ing out of a page they had opened to help on. I should say I wasn't demanding they help immediately - they could do so at their leisure ( but we did only have about 2 weeks). I even tried to joke about it "Your mission, should you decide to accept it....." I am deeply wounded by what happened. Want to make things right and asked them what I could do to make things right and got no answer.

Pls make a video on verbal abuse from rarely to basicall no interaction ppl. I was the scapegoat, they insult me heavily, punish me by cutting off my rights and destroying my birthday, Christmas and now the 2nd holiday bys making me come home extra to take care of my cat they were supposed to do. I have breakdowns and I totally isolate from women(mother wound, she was narcissist). Or a video on mother wound, not just what is this, how to stop this eternal reinicitation, it just has to stop for once I´m 43 and still get abused that´s insane here is nothing about relationship or friendship, vulnerability it´s a joke when they call me names, they do cut off the communication by taking this way. This can´t be solved with communication anymore. I was in CBT, in clinics and even the last psychologist omg she indirectly blamed me. I should have tried harder to better communicate, then I wouldn´t have been insulted and punished, the impacts on my life, health, holiday of course 0 empathy. I get no help from no one and I sometimes am so done that I just want to make it stop for good(of course just passive thoughts). I don´t think in our world I´m the only one being insulted, we need advice and help asap, I myself know others who also struggle with verbal abuse

What am I supposed to do when the women I am seeing refuses to accept what I say is the truth, that when I say nothing is wrong it's exactly that? Why is she always saying I'm the problem? I could go on!

I am miserably unhappy where my husband “forced “ a move to a different part of the country , close to his sister and brother whom we see occasionally. I signed the papers because my husband said he was going with or without me . During last year, our daughter was killed , I had serious health challenges , and beefed him repeatedly for us to sell the house before we moved in - even at a loss. He refused. We moved in May. I absolutely hate it …..16 hours from a few friends, family especially my son. I show how unhappy I am by crying very often and telling him I’m unhappy HERE. Things would not be perfect if we moved back , but I would feel better. He continues verbally and emotionally abuse me. I am strongly considering divorce , but have very little actual support to get through this nightmare.

Can people call 211 for transportation and a shelter,about adult abuse,if people on disability.

19:35 I get that all the time … i finally blew up and we are probably breaking up.

they verbaaly abuse u but if u tell them that they are hurting u u are now abusing thmn so now u deserve worst treatmentit feels lik u are justifying my abuse

Some of these interactions discussed can be abusive, but depending on the context. I have on occasion told my ex spouse that she had told me a story before, but i certainly didnt mean to shut her up. But she had a pattern of repeating these same stories over and over again. And for so long, i avoided reminding her that she told me that story before, but eventually i had to remind her that she had told me that story enough that i didnt need all the details told to me all over again. So, there are many times when something on the surface can be labeled abuse or emotional abuse when there is no abusive motivation at all. So be careful what you label as abusive in your mind because you could demonize someone who doesnt have an abusive bone in their body. As a man. I was emotionally neglected and devalued by my former spouse. She was so many things described in this video. Yes, i was guilty of many things in the video, but i was always wanting to connect with her emotionally and intimately, but i just could never get anything out of her. And i was never good enough. Sometimes when you are abused, especially as a man, it leads to behavior that seems a bit out of character. But then you always revert back to your normal self and go 'wait, what was i thinking?'. Thats me. She on the otherhand, would never tell me how sorry that she said things like 'you are not a man' or 'youre a self centered pussy bitch' or 'daddys boy pampered bitch'. She has never and will never apologize. And those things have had a devastaiting effect on my everyday well being, leading to depression.

No sound

U tell your partner things that are delicate about your childhood,family,then they get used to hurt u by your partner dont understand

I agree with much of what you are talking about; but I have a hard time with your phrase selection and key words that you're using I am sensitive and aware distasteful banter about my content , character and energy These phrases are consistent with verbal abuse . Please refrain from using me in any context that is constant hypocritical to the subject matter and disqualifies you as someone to receive safe ,neutral ethical advice from . Have a good day

you use too many big words and not enough examples. Your vocabulary is for mental health professionals. I am looking for references for young people so I can't direct any of them to your site even through you probably have the knowledge they need you are delivering it in a way that is useless and condescending to them.