Roleplay: A Separation Anxiety Story

Рет қаралды 10,079

13 жыл бұрын

For people who struggle with separation anxiety and for the ones who have to deal with them..
I wish you all the best! My mother always used to say: "You only have each other.."
..Oh and by the way.. I added some extra 'thoughts' of Bas to the video (with KZfaq note balloons) the day after I uploaded the video..
Please leave a comment!
Thank you.
Hope you are all well everyone!!
Love,
Bas & Sebastiaan ;-)
- - -
Best comment so far:
"well bas (after s. told him about watching part 2 with caroline) could have asked sebastian if he wanted to watch part three some time soon with him AND caroline, all three of them together, once he himself (bas) has gotten around to watching part 2.
that way sebastian might feel like bas accepted his having other friends and feel more comfortable with bas because hes less clingy and s. seems to like his freedom."
by DearFirebird
- - -
Bas,
I texted Sebastian! ;-)
I haven't read the comments and so i might get repeated. Bas would be better off noticing that he didn't like Sebastian's indifference, labelling his automatic thoughts and then- since his friend hadn't asked him to change the channel, continue watching it. ( i of course would have yelled: hey, why are you self-absorbed? I want some sharing, mutuality and attention!).
by kitesInSpace
- - -
What would be helpful for Bas to do? I think he should try to become more grounded and find his own self, so that he wouldn't have to be so emotionally dependent on other ppl, if they r not on the same page with him for whatever reason.
Once he can be happy within himself, other ppl will start respecting him more for who he is. And that will make it easier for him to make and keep friends.
That's EXACTLY how me and my bf broke up some time ago. I'm still shocked.
by smertgopam
- - - -

Пікірлер: 136

@ellieerose23 11 жыл бұрын

Yes, that's completely true, and I think I do understand both reasons for apologizing or not apologizing, because sometimes you can blame yourself and feel everyone's fed up with you, but it's all in your head.

@AnomalyJonez 13 жыл бұрын

my fav statement ' like she infected the store and it wll never be the same'..wow never really had words for that feeling.

@ItIsKala 6 жыл бұрын

I'm a guy with BPD. I started to cry when "the left person" left the room in the video because I can empathize so well with "the right person" (it's usually me behaving like that in my life). It literally felt like it was me being abandoned.. The worst part about it is, that you don't only feel worthless, annoying and unliked, but you also feel trapped in this situation and on top of that abandoned.. it is the absolute worst combinations of feelings you can have and I don't wish this upon anyone. Thanks for making this awesome Video and much strength and love to everyone reading this.

@mckluvermkluver 12 жыл бұрын

Oooh thats me! This is a play that happens over and over... at the point where his emotions (anxiety, hurt, fear of abandonment) flare up, he needs to stop, take a deep breath, and change direction. Swich focus from the guest - put on a tv program HE likes, get up, make a sandwich, wash his face - Im practicing this approach and found that I dont scare them off, and instead they pursue ME :)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@iwantjcslips Thanks Cheryl! And thanks for your comment! But is that what Bas wanted to do? Gotten up and gone into another room like he had better things to do? ..I personally don't like to 'dance around' too much in a difficult conversation if it isn't necessary. But it is a great way to let off some steam though.

@otahak 7 жыл бұрын

ha! this is essentially how all my friendships end - with me getting all BPD'y.

@richardblackheart9891 7 жыл бұрын

when he asked sebastian if he wanted to watch something else,and sebastian said he didnt care, bas should have just put on what he wanted to watch , it would have diverted the whole battle in his head to just watching a movie with his friend , also he shouldn't ask so many questions since he knows how he gets with his anxiety and abandonment ,thats what cause the angry/impulsive , abused/abandoned child , and the self mental abuse battle , which made him more angry because he got exactly what he didnt want to happen , your videos are really helping me , thank you so very much for your guidance in my B.P.D.

@teresadudman505 7 жыл бұрын

Bas personalised Sebastian's behaviour. Made it all about Bas. He did not think that Sebastian has a life outside of Bas x x

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable Thank you Melissa for your comment. I really admire what you do here on KZfaq. And if you ever want to know anything technical just ask because i'm a video/mac nerd :)

@Avrasong 4 жыл бұрын

I love the role playing. Really helpful examples of how to support loved ones or gain objectivity!

@katje333 10 жыл бұрын

omg! i love you mann dit is zo herkenbaar ! thank you for posting

@bexihoonna 12 жыл бұрын

I love these role playing videos. They really make things clear! Thanks:)

@lypscratchlyp 11 жыл бұрын

I love this idea, by the way, asking for help with specific situations. Reading through the comments has given me lots of ideas. You are so creative! Thank you for sharing it with me.

@MsScarredSoul 13 жыл бұрын

This video was very interesting, I had heard of separation anxiety before but didnt think it was what you portrayed. I liked the format, the way you did the video and the little out takes bit! xx

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@XXRavethedrummerXX Heeeyy Pepy! Yeah, you're right! Sebastiaan doesn't really answer the question and Bas just goes with Sebastiaan his flow. Just like that.. Thanks for the comment man!

@TheTubularman 9 жыл бұрын

amazing example..!!! thats just me.. just got this diagnosis and i have been watching all your videos. They been very helpfull. Thnak you.. and i think i should say thank you from my wife.. she can see where i changed in my beaviour. And the change is there. It is really helpful. once again! greeting from norway :D

@leighannenoelle 13 жыл бұрын

First of all, you are a fantastic actor...FOR REAL!!! And second, I really don't know how I would have responded differently. I had to laugh at the situation because it reminded me of exactly how I would react.....BUT it was also VERY interesting to have you explain why I think that way and what the reality of the situation actually was. I'll try to keep this in mind the next time a similar situation comes up. LOOOOVE YOU BAS!!!!!!!!!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@AtarasBlog Thanks for the comment. Feels like it has to be everything or nothing. Must be difficult to deal with that anxiety. Hope you'll be able to find the 'grey area' in your life. All the best!

@teresadjouablia6213 11 жыл бұрын

I suffer from BPD, and I appreciate Your comment, and at the same time....I complete can "relate" with the apologizing, because all-too-often when WE feel "attacked" or fear loss of friendships and bonds, we DO "panic" and "lash-out", so.....in THIS scenario, I would apologize too :) We must take into consideration that the "Battles" are usually ONLY existing in our own heads Again, I am grateful to see Your comment, and Thank You for opportunity to reply :)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Melrudin Hey :) Thanks for your comment! It's hard to deal with people like Sebastiaan, isn't it. Hey how was the internship in New York? You're back now?

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@MartialArtsSuperStar Well, it's great that you are now researching this Brad! It shows balls! Thanks for your comment man.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@RapidCycling07 Hey, thanks for the comment. Must be difficult to be in that situation.. Not knowing what 'it' is etc.. Did you ever consider talking to a professional? I wish you all the best!!

@aussieland878 11 жыл бұрын

I love this guy! he is soo funny! I cant help but crack up at these vids and the sad comical faces he pulls

@teresadudman505 7 жыл бұрын

You are a great, true, pure actor 🤓 x x

@WJFK480 8 жыл бұрын

By the way, these videos are very helpful. I just started watching but It's nice that they take such great care and tact to acknowledge wrong behavior but in an understanding way. I feel so stigmatized by many other videos, articles, etc.. I feel like I am at least represented as a person rather than a blob of emotions. I am very interested in this because I can't really explain why I react the way I do in certain situations and it has destroyed so many of my relationships. I want to learn why and I want others to learn why and I also want to try to learn better ways of reacting and communicating. I have a very difficult time with facial expressions and would love to understand more about that too.

@polaroidcandy 13 жыл бұрын

This video is awesome, I don't really have anything to add about what I'd do because I am really struggling with these exact situations but I hope that I learn some things from people in the comments, thanks for doing this!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@DJB4R But it's still great advice! Taking your time to 'find yourself again' is a great lesson that can be used in many situations! Thanks for the comment!

@8888-9 10 жыл бұрын

I am an avid watcher of your great ideas, as a BPD sufferer I can fully relate to this scenario, and I guess my own development here will show, as I am with Bas in his dilemma. Bas could have described what was going on for him. As he started to kind of split, and he believed every thought he was having. He could have been more open. If his friend had said he was being a drama queen at that point, his friend would not be sharing his 50% in this friendship. I agree with your comments, but I feel Bas was being thoughtful initially, and his friend was detached. Keep up the great work. Bas could have tolerated his anxiety but asked his friend for ideas about what to do together. As Bas assumed responsibility for their time together.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@idranktheseawater Thank you. Yours are fantastic. About the double me: I use final cut express (only mac). I recorded myself twice, put them under each other on the (videoprogram) timeline and simply cropped 50% of one of the recordings. If you look closely you see a line in the middle of the screen. That's where the two recordings meet. I forgot about the light from outside while recordiing :)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@tostrivetoseek Hey Grey, but you do have a point. Bas did ask: What's wrong? But Seb didn't really answer the question. He ignored it. Maybe it would have been a good idea to (in a not too direct way, no pressure) ask what was up with his boss and why he was pissing him off.. By simply repeating what he said, but then as a question. Thanks for the comment!

@ellieerose23 11 жыл бұрын

I don't think he should have apologized, because he didn't do anything wrong. This is quite a common situation for me, and thankyou, you're a great help. :) And now I know that I'm not the only person who over-reacts when this sort of thing happens.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@MsScarredSoul :) thanks!! Good to hear that!

@MegaSparky41 12 жыл бұрын

Thanks so much for all the information in your channel, nobody has given me a diagnosis but I'm sure I have this kind of disorder. I really thank you very much.

@Melrudin 13 жыл бұрын

Great video. I can relate a lot to it, though. :/ I'm not sure if I have separation anxiety but Bas's reactions sound similar to how I act sometimes. Really good video, though. :) I enjoyed it! I have no idea what Bas should have done, though.... since honestly I probably would've acted in a similar way. :/

@tostrivetoseek 13 жыл бұрын

It's quite odd (and in ways very comforting) seeing that the way I react sometimes is how someone else also reacts in similar situations. It makes me feel a lot less..weird I guess, so thanks for putting this up. I think what 'Bas' should have done after noticing Seb. wasnt really into the program and looked kinda troubled was to ask if Seb was okay. Maybe it would have sparked a conversation which would bring them closer together and make 'bas' feel needed and important to Seb.

@MartialArtsSuperStar 13 жыл бұрын

Damn it, Bas, you hit the nail on the head in this vid. This si why I've been trying to research this stuff. This was my ex and I. I was never sure what to do with anything with her. She was always threatened by girls who weren't even intrested and would scratch things off our list of things to do if she found out I did something with someone else. I could go on and on. I had no idea what I should do. The end was inevitable though for us. But from my guilt being unable to help is why I'm here

@CrystalRainDrop789 13 жыл бұрын

Whenever something like that happens to me I agonize about it for hours and I imagine that the person hates me and will never want to see me again. It's pretty frustrating. Even when the person isn't cold and rude I still read into everything and worry that they don't like me.

@batonamat098 13 жыл бұрын

this is a really good way to describe something. this situation is something i can relate to alot an although im not to sure how he should hav reacted differently personally i would hav hone quiet at that point instead of gettin angry in case i said something that would hav upset the other person xx grat vid tho xx

@GMarieBehindTheMask 9 жыл бұрын

Thank you spot on wow I have bpd

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@stevehaylingisland Well it's about feelings ofcourse but imho as soon as he starts to depend on Sebastiaan he is so vulnerable and not really able to make decisions for himself anymore. Thanks for your comment Steve! (It's Steve right?)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@stevehaylingisland Yeah, i agree with you. I wrote it down a bit short and black&white ..I'm trying to answer all the comments at the moment :)

@MarianaTrench6699 10 жыл бұрын

I'm going to jump in on this comment thread. I think Bas Loves/Cares too much. And I also think that Sebastion could be more open. I find it exceptionally rude when people start texting someone else when I;m trying to spend time with them, or communicate with them. But maybe its just my BPD talking. I'll often go so far as to leave my phone behind when im with someone i care deeply for, to give them my undivided attention.. the whole golden rule thing. Absolutely love your videos Bas!!! thanks!!

@che11113 10 жыл бұрын

Seb's roleplay exists to exploit Bas's self fulfilling feelings of separation anxiety. Seb's not offering any signals to enable Bas to please Seb. This is something Bas cant cope with, so without feedback Bas starts mindreading Seb's intent. As Bas can only perceive separation issues, these beliefs will trigger the fulfilment of the separation anxiety. What could Bas do? Go back and watch the rest of the TV show, and allow Seb to tell him if he wants to do something else. Learn to trust Seb !

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@agrava100 'People with separation anxiety tend to be attracted by people who don't really pay attention to their feelings' that is so true!!

@einbischen 12 жыл бұрын

After he said dramaqueen he should've simulated busting into tears and girl slapping him.

@HLGFreeman 12 жыл бұрын

Bas should have persisted more in his concern for Sebastian, about what was bothering him about his boss instead of trying to focus on the fact that he didn't want to spend the time in the way Bas imagined. He could have said "You seem really bothered by your Boss, tell me what's bothering you". That way he would 1. get the attention he needs but in a more constructive way, 2. get out of his OWN head and mindset and 3. reinforce the friendship with Sebastiaan by showing concern. Win-Win. (1/2)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@kitesInSpace Ha ha! No? You won't LEAVE me? ha ha. Thank you for the other very powerful comment. People need to know about that!

@AvaAvaneDawn 13 жыл бұрын

@AvaAvaneDawn As for bas, zie could confront sebastian, asking for more response or attention. Not demanding it, but perhaps being open about hirs emotions. Putting it out there. Also not taking shit, or apologizing if one doesn't feel one has done anything wrong, just to get back on the other persons good side. Boundaries and conflict go hand in hand; being able to express different opinions is important to handle separation anxiety/clinging.

@GMarieBehindTheMask 9 жыл бұрын

I'm like that a lot I can't stop I have bpd pretty badly

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@smertgopam And thank you for a GREAT comment!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@leighannenoelle Hey :D thanks for the sweet comment!! You always make me smile :) Hope you are having a great day miss canada girl :)

@raezer 12 жыл бұрын

There are so many responses on here, I like to read them all but my eyes are going cross eyed lol. I didn't really understand separation anxiety, as what you are showing here. I thought it was something different. That in it self is a eye opener for me. I can relate to some of this. For me, having friends over is a way to connect, and if I feel that the person isn't enjoying what we are doing, I like to find something we both enjoy to do together so we can have that bond. cont...

@RapidCycling07 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable I haven't had the best experiences with Psychiatrists and Psychologists. It seems like the best help I get comes from speaking with individuals who had similar issues as myself in the past but then recovered or at least made improvements. It might be because they can relate better to me. That is why I am a big fan of your videos.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@AvaAvaneDawn wow, maybe you are right about the passive aggressive thing (sebastian). I hadn't even thought of that. Which is weird of course since i created this video myself. Thank you!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@MsDementedArts Thanks, i wish i had more outtakes, lol. You are kind of right about Carolyn..that's the point where Bas lost his grip on reality and started one of his owns.

@iwantjcslips 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable Yeah, I get what you're saying. "Dancing around" probably wouldn't solve anything and might have even made things worse. Unfortunately, that's one of my many flaws. I tend to "dance around" and then set myself up for disappointment when the other person can't read my mind. Thanks for responding! :-)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@smertgopam I'm putting it in the description box :)

@Aqua8401 11 жыл бұрын

Your funny bas in the beginning lol

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@CrystalRainDrop789 I can really relate to what you are saying. ..It's almost like you WANT that person to not like you anymore...

@Starfire5930 12 жыл бұрын

OMG I went through that before, but I was the one that was losing it, and feeling the same thing as bas. Omg I have this so bad, it like watching a show about my own behavior..shakes head laughing

@stevehaylingisland 13 жыл бұрын

I forgot to say how much I enjoyed the piece and also how much I admire what you have done. In reply to this idea of 'mistake', 'not a mistake' is a bit black and white. I think sometimes there is a time lag between continuing to make 'mistakes' and not beating your self up about it. Accept ones crapnes in these situations for a while possibly.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Melrudin Ok, sorry, i thought it was in NY, lol. And now your final semester? Sounds like a busy/stressful time.. I wish you good luck!!!! It's such a great feeling when you are done.. Something to keep in mind when you are stressing :)

@csugga 11 жыл бұрын

jeetje...zo herkenbaar... ik heb geen idee want ik doe hetzelfde

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@mentalhealthhelpUK I'm so glad you are back!! *doing a little dance* Ok, about the video, lol. Yeah, learning to trust on your qualities as a friend is indeed very important. Otherwise friendships will never really work. But it's so SO hard. But once it works out a bit, i know from my own experiences, the strength that you feel can be fantastic!

@iPusher 12 жыл бұрын

I have bpd and had it since young. I really don't know anything other than my own feelings, but i can try to feel what other feel and that makes everything so much easier. I think that the friend didn't do anything wrong (except saying "dramaqueen and so on). He seemed depressed by his boss. And the bpd-guy just was to self concerned and that annoyed the friend. You can't actually tell somebody to behave when they didn't do anything wrong. The friend was just depressed.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@nephilimchrist Hey Madeline, well i'm glad that you can say that, and i hope you can also feel that way.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Chiiiiyo The thing is that you can't change others, but you can change yourself. NOW: it's all about wanting attention from a guy who is busy with his phone and doesn't want to give that attention. He is rude..but also in control..something is wrong with that situation.

@HLGFreeman 12 жыл бұрын

Maybe this is a typical manipulative BPD solution? But I recognise a lot in myself and this is how I would have handled it. Shifting the focus outwards, showing your concern for your friend and in that way closing the gap. The tricky part? When despite all efforts he would still dismiss you. I'd say ok you obvisouly don't want to talk, you're having a bad day , I understand" and try to leave it at that. This way you rationalise away your fear of abandonment. I know it's hard though (2/2)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@jalvmxm Thank you!! That's sweet.

@iPusher 12 жыл бұрын

I think some people with BPD can't stand having people around them that don't give them attention they craving for. And when they don't get that attention, they'll blame the people as if they were devils from the under ground. I have bpd but i know it is very hard for people to give that attention because it's craving 24/7, not as normal people that just need to know sometime that they're OK.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@composer63 thank you Charles.

@mckluvermkluver 12 жыл бұрын

oh, and the friend watches videos with bas regularly, and so is tolerant of bas's emotional turmoil, and his distance is more likely a way of coping than a show of rudeness or dislike :)

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Tianshi01 Hey :) Well i can understand the, not being to handle these situations, part even more from you after seeing your 'New Years Resolutions tag' video... Focus on yourself. You are a great person. Try to not only feel this, but eventually.. 'know' this. If you can do that (which takes time) you won't be treated the way Sebastiaan treats Bas anymore. Take care.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@polaroidcandy Hey Emma, Well the most important thing (imho) is that you keep focussing on yourself. 'We' tend to let the 'other' take control over our thoughts, emotions and actions. thought: EVERYTHING DEPENDS ON THEM! In the past, i was willing to move the earth a bit to the left.. just to make someone smile at me..

@iwantjcslips 13 жыл бұрын

Bas should have just dealt with the fact that Sebastian already watched LOTR 2. He should have maybe tried to think of another friend he could watch it with and not made such a big deal out of it. Sebastian was being a little rude by looking so uninterested in the whole conversation so I think Bas should have gotten up and gone into another room like he had better things to do. He wouldn't have seemed so clingy and Sebastian probably would've gotten the point. Your vids are awesome!!

@AvaAvaneDawn 13 жыл бұрын

I actually feel sebastian was quite unfair in the beginning too. I get the feeling that zie is passive aggressive, although that could be the borderline within me talking. Like zie wants to get attention but won't express it. I could be projecting, as I sometimes do in situations where I don't know what the other person wants. Sebastian could be more open though, and make an effort of contacting bas, talking to hirs face instead of the phone.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@CrespinMinPin Hey :) Well I think it's so great that people can feel this way!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@Kathrynmovies Hey Kat :) Thanks. How are you doing today? STAY STRONG!

@nephilimchrist 13 жыл бұрын

I think I would have said, 'oh well, I will watch it on my own then.' And I would have asked what Caroline thought of the film.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@avarules2 Thanks Shahid!

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@IrishGingerzRule Thanks Leann :) Yeah, your green is my red, lol.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@composer63 Keep depending on yourself..and not the other. The focus should be on yourself, 'looking' at the two of you.

@ChrissyTopicsTV 10 жыл бұрын

Gray is my ex smh even looking at this i feel like he should've understood we suppose to watch walking dead together just rude smh

@nephilimchrist 13 жыл бұрын

i can also understand why the guy felt as he did, as i still feel like that in situations but i somehow manage to deal with it. no idea how.

@Hooga89 12 жыл бұрын

I'm terrified... because I can be like this myself.

@ColdIndian1 12 жыл бұрын

Sebastian was shut down to Bas from the beginning. After he mentioned Caroline's purchase at the "same discount night", in a disparaging tone; Bas should have initiated his own choices, including popping in Part 2 of the movie. Bas must learn to recognize Sebastian's indifference is Sebastian's problem. Bas must not doubt himself, and learn to expect undesirable behavior from others - then create his own positive actions.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@mkjartansson :) thanks Magnús!!

@Raina430 11 жыл бұрын

Sebastian is not acting like a friend. He is shut down and preoccupied. I would let Sebastian leave and work out something I could enjoy on my own while searching for better friends. Can borderlines enjoy anything on their own, or is support so essential that a bad friend is better than none? This a serious question.

@FDPowerLifter 13 жыл бұрын

ive been thinkin about this for awhile.... but yeah... i dont know how i woulda reacted. lately ive been just trying to ignoire it and wait for a few hours or a day and then take a decision from there because i know that in the heat of the action i do alot of crap...

@ccsmith5111 8 жыл бұрын

... First of all, you are such a cutie, as your personality is just beautiful. =) You are so enjoyable! Your videos are so educational, so enlightening, & so well put together. Thank you! If I were Bas, & had the chance for a "do - over", I would say "Yeah, Sebastian, I'll just let ya know after I am able to view the 2nd if the trilogy, & then we can arrange a night to watch the 3rd together, & we could invite Caroline & Chris too, if you want?! That'd be cool!!! (= If I were Sebastian, I would have apologized for labeling Bas, & for taking out my bad day on him. [{ I appreciate the time you take on these videos, helping others, while remaining to be true to yourself! Thank you! What a role model!!! YOU ARE AAAHH-MAZING! 😃}]

@bexihoonna 12 жыл бұрын

I think he should have watched the video himself and enjoyed it. His friend was preoccupied with his phone anyways. This is what I have witnessed confident people do. I myself would have played the host and tried to please because if my guest left prematurely they might never ever return because I am "boring" and a "bad" host! lmbo! my mind is ridiculous;)

@souhilaxa 6 жыл бұрын

that's so awful and true :'(

@RapidCycling07 13 жыл бұрын

Its funny how I see myself in this video. I have to question myself and my perceptions because when I feel rejected, or like someone does not like my anymore, the feelings become very generalized and I feel as though everyone hates me. Yet sometimes when I feel good, it as though everyone wants to be my friend. All it takes is the wrong facial expression/body language/or tone of voice for me to get really upset and feel as though people hate me. I am coming to the conclusion that I may have BPD.

@MeAndMyBlackTable 13 жыл бұрын

@somekindamillie It's hard, isn't it. I still make so many mistakes myself when i am in such a situation. Hope you are ok.

@tostrivetoseek 13 жыл бұрын

@tostrivetoseek Hmm, there's no way to delete comments. I watched it back and realised 'bas' did ask 'what's wrong?'. My apologies. I agree with Firebird in that by suggesting they get together as a group he isnt trying to restrict Seb. The downside though is if 'Seb' replies with a no, he'd rather keep things seperate. I had experienced this very recently and it just made me feel like he was spending time with others in order to escape from me :(

@WJFK480 8 жыл бұрын

Should have? Well I don't know what he should have done; however, I would most likely have first noticed that Sebastian looked bored and a little angry. I would wonder why. I might ask him "have you already seen this movie we're watching now?" If he said no, I'd just assume he didn't like it, didn't really want to even be there and was probably itching to get home. Therefore, I would have felt hurt and dismissed. I would turn the TV off and wait for his reaction. Probably not the way it should go but who knows?

@mgraoui255 11 жыл бұрын

this is what i feel like has been happening with me and my friend (and she is currently pregnant) but anyways ever since she found out she was pregnant i feel this overwhelming fear that she doesnt want to be my friend anymore...I know that it is just the BPD rearing its ugly self concious head. but i cant help but feel so lonely and insecure when she does that i know that she isnt but the way she acts is just preying on my insecurities and i dont want to lose her.... :(

@stevehaylingisland 13 жыл бұрын

Hi Bas, not realy knowing what was happening in his head but just guessing that there was a deepening negative emotional state building up. I could only hope that he has learned to notice when this was happening and to get to know that feeling and beware about what behaviour is likely to result and get some control back ?

@Melrudin 13 жыл бұрын

@MeAndMyBlackTable Yeah, my final semester will be stressful-I'm student teaching and am really nervous about it (though excited at the same time!). I don't want to graduate, though. haha. I'll miss all my friends here. I'm applying to teach in Japan once I graduate, so hopefully, if I get one of those jobs, I'll be more excited about graduating.