“People that love you learn you” Powerful

Ladies, I know some of these points sound hard. However, as someone who has been in an abusive marriage for over 10 years. Every one of these 6 points are 100% accurate! Everyone of these boundaries (complete with examples) where exhibited by my former spouse. Please please carefully consider what this gentleman is saying. It can save you years of heartbreak and emotional damage.

I found out today a man ive dated for 4m had an incurable std, a secret kid, and lied about it all. I'm extremely grateful ive been abstinent for 4 years . Im 29, but trying to stay hopeful. This message is timely.

Briefly talked to a man in his mid 40s who always complained about his financial situation. I'm thinking in my head (I'm not paying his bills) 😄. Why would a man open up to you about his finances so quickly and always talking about his money problems??? I politely broke it off. I'm not a piggy bank and have my own bills ✌️

This is what I needed in my 20's ! And early 30s. I was SO SO SILLY!!. I had very low self esteem, I had lack of boundaries, I was desperate for a man, I was drinking a lot. What a mess I was! And I hope my eldest girl forgives me for my mistakes. I know so much better now. This is a very good teaching RC blakes

I’m 54 years old today - March 19, 1968. I’ve had ALL of these boundaries since as far back as I can remember. He is straight telling the truth. Set these boundaries when you’re young and it will save you a lot of heartache (I’ve NEVER experienced excruciating heartbreak or heartache). I have experienced being loved from the top of my head to the sole of my feet. I have been loved in spite of all of my issues and shortcomings. And I have loved back in return. But God….

My mom taught me to never loan a man money as it makes them weak!

1. Your Children 1a. Do not Expose random men to your children 1b. Insist that no man impose self on your kids 2. Money 3.Your Personal Triggers 3b. Makes you feel bad about yourself. 3c. Goes for your Insecurities 4. Your Family 5. Intimacy boundary 6. Privacy Boundaries

My wife set that boundary with her daughter..I respected her for that then and of course I respect her now for doing that. I never wanted to rush into anything with her and when the time was right we met. I appreciate my wife for being the strong woman that she is and I thank GOD for her.

I am so looking forward to hear this. I am a young woman from Bulgaria and I am so happy to have found you. You have such a great impact on my life and also the life of my sister and close girlfriends. Thanks to you I step now into the world as a strong woman, full of self knowledge and wisdom. ❤️

Any wise and queen conscious woman must enforce BOUNDARIES in the process of dating a man. When you live your life as a woman without boundaries, it is like living with the doors and windows open of your home. Dudes without good intentions, do not want to tolerate boundaries. And when a woman enforces those boundaries it weeds out the pretenders from the contenders and the fakes from the authentic. 1. *Your Children* A HARD BOUNDARY a. Do not Expose random men to your children. You cannot allow a man to use them as pawns 1b. Insist that no man impose himself on your kids. A predator will use your kids to impress you and once you let down your guard, they will take advantage of the kids. Sexually or physically or verbally. 2. Money No wise woman should ever allow a grown man she is trying to get to know to ask her for money. Once the money boundary has been breached, there is very little hope of a healthy future. You got to get a man who is a provider. Don’t let him decide what you should be doing with your money. A bum asks a woman for her money. Don’t tolerate a man who is coming for your money. He’s giving you sex and you’re paying him. That’s all it is. 3. Your Personal Triggers. (Trigger means doing or saying something that takes you back to you past and makes you relive something painful or hurtful) When a man goes for your Insecurities and makes you feel bad about yourself it is an intentional breech of an emotional boundary and not a mistake. He wants to render you emotionally enslaved or subjugated. When there’s intimacy - INTO ME YOU SEE, he will pay attention to you response and your energy. When he loves you, he will learn you. 4. Your Family - He will insert himself into your family and friends uninvited so he can manage you through them and thru peer pressure. He can also paint a false positive about himself with them so when you find out who he really is, everyone will say the problem one is you. Make sure he’s is not popping up where he’s not wanted. That could be stalking! 5. Intimacy boundary - This is a touchy, feely dude. No man should be touching you unless he is invited into that space. He doesn’t know what it could be triggering in you. Be careful of a man who is overly compliments you and your beauty. He may reach straight for your chest from there! If you let it go, next time you’re gonna be asking for trouble. 6. Privacy Boundaries - No popping up at your work place or house uninvited. No touching your phone or scrolling through your data and pictures. A healthy individual has a measure of privacy and when a man cannot respect that he is going to enslave you.

Just as single mothers shouldn’t have random men coming in & out of the house, the fathers shouldn’t have random women in front of their children

This is why I gave up on dating. I’m 46 years old and I really don’t casually date. My husband passed away & mid 40s dating life is stressful. I was the one who set boundaries and my kids are grown. I don’t play about my money or my personal space & I don’t deal with bums. My money is not any man’s business if I don’t have his last name. With all that being said. I see the red flags 🚩.. I acknowledge my preferences and these men try to mold themselves into who they think you want them to be. Very manipulative. The Narcissist believes in his craziness and can get aggressive with rejection. Men are crazy & when they sense you are pulling away they go harder. I feel uncomfortable when they show up on my social media and doing random stuff.I’ve heard some great teachings from Bishop Blakes, but this one is a gem.💎

TRIGGERS!!! Yeap this is what I experienced in a past situationship!! No matter how many times I told the person I did not like something, they would stop for a moment then do it all over again! My anxiety was ALWAYS HIGH, I hated the feeling…due to the anxiety I lost so much weight…it was the Lord telling me, LEAVE HIM ALONE, but I hung around for a minute longer, got tired and threw up the ✌🏾✌🏾✌🏾 and when I did the anxiety immediately left! So I will never eva disregard my instincts again! I’m thankful to the Most High God that nothing physical ever happened with us! Praise the Lord!!

A narcissistic man does some of those things to his wife after the wedding. Because you ignored the red flags and he also blames someone else for his shortcomings. Thank you sir for such insights that you share unselfishly. 👏

I wish you were doing this when I was in my twenties and thirties. Now at 48 and watching you for the past 4 years has healed a whole lifetime of mistakes, heartache, and sadness. I'm such in a better place, know my worth, and it shows! I feel it exuding power, discernment, grace, and strength. Thank you Pastor Blakes!! My spiritual father!!

Bishop u should have been around me 50yrs ago when I was a child! I was taught like many women I was worthless & no one would ever want me! I was shocked when someone showed me attention! I had no self-esteem! It took GOD many decades to let me know how precious I am to him! I try not to eat junk food, hear or see junk or mess! I had to learn my body is not a trash can for foolishness or foolish ppl! Thank u for all your help & wisdom u have imparted to this world! We've never met in person, but u are one of my favorite leaders! Thank u again so much! GOD BLESS U!!!

Thank you for being an amazing father figure to me. I have an amazing dad at home, but he just never taught me this stuff. I’m glad to be learning from other men such as yourself. 💙

You going in on us. " You need a checkup from the neck up" I learned my lessons my boundaries were weak and I got played. Now I have non-negotiables and my boundaries are solid. Thank you for making me a better woman

🗣ALL RISE!!!! 🙏🏿The honorable BISHOP BLAKES presiding over the classroom in session!🅰️➕

People that love you do learn you for the benefit of how best to relate to you but sometimes people "learn" you so they can use things against you and it has nothing to do with love its all for their benefit.

I'm almost 50 years old and am so blessed to be a recipient of your teachings. Thank you dearly ♥️

12 years ago, a Dusty man who was trying to get to know me once told me that I was so guarded. I now understand what I was doing. ENFORCEMENT of my boundaries. I thank God for the gift of discernment.

I waited for this testimony today. Yes woman we need to wake up and have discernment about the men we let in our lives. stop letting the thing between your legs lead you to become numb to the obvious signs he is not the one.

I think I have too many boundaries…better safe than sorry. 🤷🏽‍♀️ It helps me sift and discern. As for men and my kids I won’t even allow them in my house or around them unless I KNOW he’s not temporary. I have 2 young ladies to raise and I know they’re watching me.

Don't lower your standards and don't give money to a dude. BW are known to want to help bm and stick by them no matterwhat. Stop. Explore better options.

Lack of boundaries and tolerance of poor treatment equates to low self-value. Lots of us really need to do the self reflection to understand the root of poor decisions. Some of us have been mishandled, exposed and abused at a young age. To demand better we must feel better about ourselves.

The “popping that gum” takes me out Everytime 😂🤣🤦🏾‍♀️ I love me some RC Blake I swear it’s like a talk w dad.

This is real talk!! The boundaries go for friends and family, also.

I have changed and I am changing more each day thank you God.

You remind me of my father when I was a teenager and young adult and showed interest in a potential boyfriend the first thing my father would ask does he work. The unconditional love of a father is the best teacher of boundaries for a girl

Reminder on!! Im about to get married!!! Watch!

This is so spot on! My ex read my journals, searched my car, always went thru my phone, required I share my location with him 24/7, popped up at my job random times … and in the end he cheated with his best friends little sister, who is 20+ years his JUNIOR! He became so angry when I put it all together … I became a stupid fat bitch and every name in the book. Straight demon. Thank you for these teachings Bishop!

I appreciate your teachings RC Blake. Since my late husband passed away I have not introduced anyone to my kids especially to my daughter. I will protect her at all cost. I am going to wait until that man has proven to be my husband or worth to be my husband. Otherwise, I am good being single 😁.

I don’t play with my money boundary!! I’m so glad to hear a good man confirm this!!

Absolutely amazing. I thank God for saving me and freeing me from a toxic relationship of 5 years. All of these boundaries were breached while in my relationship, and I didn’t even realize it all until I look back now. I now know what my boundaries should be and continuing to discover who I truly am now that I know the damage that not having boundaries will do to you! I never learned any of this from my parents. Maybe because they haven’t had their boundaries either, but going forth I WILL stand firm in these. Especially since I am a mother and successful woman. No man will ever take advantage or manipulate me and my vision for myself ever again. Thank you so much!

Pastor … thank you … I just cut him Off with no words … I could not deal with the devaluing , passive aggressive , and triggering me . I feel good without him .. 🙏🏽

Thank you so much for this hard lesson. I see how much I was allowing even when I started to place boundaries. The boundaries have to be guarded 24/7/365

Yes self love is key. A woman moves in silence which doesnt you need any man speaking into your soul. When you wait on God for a man. He will walk into your life. A whole man will marry a woman who's whole and God knows this. Also God will tell you who your spouse is. Women dont purse. Men purse. And woman approve or dont.

Thank you so much RC Blakes. I dated a man who had issues respecting my boundaries. Left him & found out he spread terrible rumors about me. So sad I realized this man had no integrity. Lives with his sister like Joe with Madea. I dodged a bullet with that one. Saving this as a reminder for my boundaries. Blessings to you & your wife.

I'm 54 years old. I remember one of my aunt's telling me in my 30's when she was giving her always wicked but, accurate advice about "some" men...."Watch your pocketbook!"😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅🙌🏿😅

Some women experience 'financial abuse' from their husbands. When a man takes most of his wife's earnings by using 'scare tactics' and pressure. *He then use the money to establish himself, {without her}* The lies: may I borrow some money or lend me some money. *Those 'loans' are not repaid* This pattern leaves such women in 'financial straits'; with nothing to show for their toil & labor. 🤔

The ex narc absolutely tried to insert himself into the lives my family and friends without my permission. Calling them, texting them, etc. But I peeped his strategy early on & I knew that he was trying to manage their perception of him & to use my own family as his allies. Boy, bye👋🏽 .

I'm married already but much spiritual information to help other women and better myself. Thank you.

“Grown Rusty negro” 😂 you never miss!! 🙌🏽❤️

Listening. I did not have boundaries. I was wrong. Just was discarded by a narcissist and I just found out what a narcissist was recently. Rather than have full faith in God. I was distracted by the man and believed all the lies and deceit. It was a con from the get go. Prior to this I was not in a relationship for 4 years. I take full accountability. I’m trying to let go. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Triggers....he thinks it is funny to raise your blood pressure - RUN -

Absolutely Bishop. Boundaries Are Essential. Not compromising my boundaries. We Teach People how to teach you.. Single by choice/Not Thirsty and Not Shacking. I was dating someone briefly asked if he could move in . My response. Absoutely NOT. !!! Red Flags. Believing God for my husband. God fearing On Fire for the Lord. Real Man! ThankYou Bishop for teaching this valuable lesson .AMEN

1. your children 2. your money 3. your triggers/ comment: people that love u, learn u 4. your family 5. your body Thank You! Thank You!

I’m sooooooo ready for this conversation, I need it like my Word and Fruits 🍎 and 🥕 Veggies, you Feed me, nourish me and I even have my nieces picking up little tidbits about being a Princess and the attributes of Queenology 👑👑👑👑, start them young

I hope everyone is well and ready to be educated 🙏🏾😉

At the point in my life where I definitely need to hear this. Keep me in your prayers please!

Pastor RC Blakes I have been watching you for a long time. It’s amazing how you still give me gems I can never thank you enough for your service to us daughters of a king. Love you from South Africa

He's not apologetic but he is sorry 😂😂 💯💯

I was dating a man. That always borrowed money from me. It was so bad that my family couldn't stand him. Granted he paid it back. It still was a trigger. Because they felt like he should be helping you. How can he take from a woman with 4 kids. My ex wanted to be a millionaire, so he would have half his check going to his 401k. That's why he never had money. I eventually came to my senses.

"You need a check up...from the neck up." Lol . I love your sense of humour.😀

Thaannkkkk youuuuuuu!!!! 🙏🏾😀🙌🏾🏃🏾‍♀️This is going to change my life! Keep me from wasting my time. I'm encountering ALL of these scenarios. I'm Christian, single and celibate, and started dating again after taking a self imposed break. I've done ok 😏 enforcing my boundaries. But I'm going to do waaay better! When I say these things to men that you mentioned, they try to make me seem like I'm being unreasonable or jealous. 😩 Smh. And then I second guess myself. This is the confirmation I needed. Thank you Pastor Blakes! I'm going to stand my ground and do so with authority! It's not my job to convince a man to respect my boundaries. I give too many chances before cutting them off. If he doesn't respect them off jump, I'm out. 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

I never had children, Pastor, have seen this so many times with friend & family. Preach Pastor! This needed be said. Thank You Jesus!!!!

Like 16:10 those who are faithful in the least are faithfull in the most. Those who are unfaithful in the least are unfaithful in the most. A man asking for money while dating is unfaithful in the least. When he does it, you have your answer to the more important questions, faithfulness to you, faithful to your relationship. He will certainly be unfaithful in all his ways. Money being the least in the relationship. Putting money between you and him. He just showed you who he is completely.

I was just asked on a date and haddddd to come have this conversation with my father in Christ RC Blakes FIRST‼️‼️‼️ Thank you Jesus for your wisdom!

This is what I needed back in my 30s but I'm so blessed at 48 to have you in my life and this teaching. Thank you Pastor Blakes 💙🙌

"What are you losing?" 🤣🤣🤣

Not only does bringing various men around your kids damage your image in your kids eyes, but when those relationships end, it adds pain of abandonment to your kids psyche.

This came right on time. Can't wait to hear the message.

I will never allow no man to treat me poorly ever again!! I mean that! I fell short! My spirit was not in alignment with God & I did not take heed to what the Holy Spirit was showing me. I was disregarding the discernment God was giving me like a fool!! But never again Lord!

''Boundaries sustain your individual clarity''.

I’m only 6 minutes in, but thank you so much for the way you encourage women. Especially as a man. We love you and you’re doing a great thing. May God bless and increase you in every area of your life. May he strengthen your union with your wife and shower you with abundant favour and blessings. Ijn amen 🙏🏾

At 24 and single. This couldn't have come in no other time than now. Thank God for tonight! BOUNDARIES make me the woman i should be! And my children(to be) can't be exposed like that. Nahhh🙏🙏

YESSSSSS 🤩 I’m looking forward to this 🌟

You Tought this Thing Right HERE! Thank You for taking the time to Pour into Us!

Yessss! Can’t wait.

Whew… What a great message Bishop RC Blake’s. I replayed this message 5 times. This message brought tears to my eyes! 24 years with the Narc, I didn’t know what I was dealing with. I loved so hard that I lost myself. Boundaries are so important.

This is so factual. Boundaries are essential!!🙌🙏🙌

Grateful 2b here. Be blessed RC & Lisa

Okay, Bishop. You telling my business. 😯. Yes.. I give up my goals and had no boundaries. Good news! I am back on track. I picked up my goals and reset my boundaries. Thank you Bishop and First Lady Lisa for the important message. ♥️🌷

Made all these detrimental mistakes, me & my children are survivors of Domestic Abuse-Violence. I am trying to help others with my book about toxic dating dynamics. I am an ole hippie chick, but no matter the ethnicity all losers/ predators sound the same...luv your antics!! 💜

Excellent. Such great teaching. Thank you

Thankyou pastor RV Blakes ! I cannot wait to hear your advice. Looking forward to hearing the message your about to drop Tonight.See you shortly.🙏👍

Thank you for having this talk with us!❤

Oh my goodness… your message was very touching. I wish I had this 35 years ago when I was a teenager. But I’m never too old to learn. Many blessings to you and your wife. You are truly a blessing to all that can hear your voice.

I have very clear boundaries and I have regained my self-esteem and know my worth so whoever I choose and let into my life it is not a benefit, it is a privilege.

This was sooooo good Bishop! Thank you!

Man look bishop be having me rolling 🤣🤣😆 preach pastor! Nothing but the truth!! 💯🙌🏾🙌🏾

Reminder set ...🙌🏽

Great message as always, thank you. God Bless💓 love this background too

I need this reminder

This message is Right On Time!! 🙏🏾Thank you & God Bless!

On point and right on time!! Thx and God bless you 🙏 🙌

Good evening everyone I'm so glad to hear this message tonight. Thank you Pastor Blake I have been learning a lot from you.🙏🏾♥️

Haven't been a session that I disagreed with yet pastor! You speaking ALL the truth!

Thank you for your teachings Father B!🙏🏾❤️

This was so good! Thank you!!!!

Good evening Pastor Blakes patiently waiting for yet another teaching thats right on time ⏲️ 🙌

I wish I could have heard this message 20 yrs ago!

Wonderful Topic! Thank you 🙏🏾. BOUNDARIES are so IMPORTANT and NECESSARY!!!

Please give guidance for older single / divorced woman on how to handle relationships. Starting over but seems to go into the same spiral again and again

Thank you soooo much Pastor Blakes. I have truly enjoyed this teaching, as I also always enjoy the various other ones. May God continue to bless you and your family.

Thank you! Right on time. I look back at those red flags that I did not know quite how to process back then, but I now know...

He used to ask if my day was busy he was really pocket watching. My self love journey began over a year ago, I am forever changed and impacted and now my work on forgiving myself

Thank you for sharing Pastor.