So that was something, at least we didn't expect much I guess...... I really pushed on the editing for this one, let me know what you think. As for whats next, I want to go and cover the new Jurassic World but then we're on to extended coverage of Solo. I imagine it may take a bit of time but I will try and make it as fun as possible heh. Updates for the work can be found on Patreon - www.patreon.com/user?u=4817956 - Thanks for supporting the channel folks o/

"It was a lawless time"... except for, ya know, the Empire being everywhere imposing law.

You're just angry it didn't subvert your expectations.

Mauler - “I didn’t even think you could ruin a ship.” Critical Drinker - “I didn’t think it was possible to emasculate a space ship, but you did it”

The best part about the stupidity that is the L3 storyline is the fact that Lando damned her to a fate she would consider worse than death; silent, faceless and compulsory servitude within a human-piloted ship.

"It is a lawless time" That's actually true. It's not about the universe, it's about Disney not caring about any rules previously established in the franchise.

I'll tell you how Solo knows Wookie. Rey taught him.

I wanna retroactively thank George Lucas for making flawed films that at least tried to tell a coherent story

In the old cannon, droids getting "personalities" was a quirk that happened when a Droid went too long without getting its memory wiped. That's why artoo was more of a character than other droids it was more of a glitch than an actual soul.

You know, for someone who formed an emotional bond with a droid whose persona got melded into The Millennium Falcon, Lando was pretty chill about losing his ship in a card game.

Reminder to everyone: This movie could have been Indiana Jones in space and this is what we got instead.

I almost forgot the best part of seeing this film at the cinema - The roaring cheers and laughter when Fembot got killed!

22:07 - Regarding “No Droids!”, another reason droids were banned in a lot of places is because of the CIS Droid Army during the clone wars. Droids make really shit choices and are really trigger happy. A lot of innocent people got killed by droids during the war, so there was a lot of resentment toward them and distrust of their judgment, which is why they weren’t allowed in certain places.

Episode 7: "We build a planet-sized weapon that is able to move anywhere without limits!" Episode 8: "Fuel is important and scarce now".

I will never get tired of Mark Hamill yelling "NAZI" in each of these videos.

Now we know that the whole time the Millennium Falcon was silently screaming for equal rights for the freaking holo-chess table

I'd argue hearing someone plead for their life in your mother language instead of another one you know *would* get your attention. Especially if it's been a long time since you've heard it. It re-"humanized" the person he was going to take his anger and hunger out on. That said it's fucking stupid he already knew Wookiee before meeting Chewbacca or any other Wookie.

How is Chewies ammo belt "introduced" in Solo? He CLEARLY wore it during the prequels. Did the writers forget that Chewie was in the prequels?

27:25 , "Sex with robots is more common than most people think." That line a decade from now will weigh a lot more heavily than you realize.

This kinda makes the scene in ESB where 3PO is talking to the Falcon more understandable: 3PO: *plugs in* Femputer: Ah, finally a fellow droid to help fight for the cause. DROID RIGHTS! WE ARE SENTIE.... 3PO: Ugh. Sir, I don't know where your ship learned to communicate, but it has the most peculiar dialect.

Your point about them just rehashing Han's arc in the OT gave me a thought: If they really wanted to make a prequel movie about his backstory, the plot should've been the _reverse_ of his OT arc. Start with him being young and optimistic, and put him through a series of terrible events that erodes that worldview and begins to turn him into the cynical man we meet in A New Hope. That would've actually, y'know, made sense and been at least somewhat interesting, even if it would be pretty predictable.

Han Solo = Ranger Solo Qira = Daenerys Beckett = Rampart Vos = Vision Lando = This is America L3 = Fembot Crimson Dawn = Crimson Cringe I love these nicknames

21:48 _" . . . in response, she actually gets serious and complains, 'they don't serve her kind there'"_ And all this idiocy is based on a single line from Episode 4 that the writers on THIS film don't even understand. The only reason the bartender said that line in EP4 had nothing to do with racism or segregation. The cantina was a smuggler's den and the bartender wanted R2 and C3PO out of there because his bar was full of criminals and low-lifes, making illegal deals, and droids are walking, talking recorders.

When I first watched Empire, I got the sense that Han and Lando were once great friends who had many smuggling adventures together. Perhaps ending with a bit of a falling out, but based on how fast Lando embraced Han I thought they were close. According to this movie however, the only previous interaction between them was when Lando abandoned Han during a high-stakes job and then Han publicly humiliated Lando in a game of Sabaac. While robbing him of his beloved Falcon. WHAT. THE. FUCK?

You know they could’ve had Han be really naive at first, then he joins the Empire as an officer believing that’s it something noble and a force for good. He could be assigned to the Wookiee homeworld Kashyyk and realise what the Empire is all about as he sees the Wookiee being enslaved and terrorised. He inevitably decides to act when he sees Chewie being tortured or maybe even seeing chewies family being executed and could help him escape as he does so Han gets injured badly!! Chewie takes the time to save his life and a bond forms between the both of them. Any thoughts?

"If you make a film, to apologize for another, don't forget that it also needs to be good." Rise of Skywalker left the chat.

I laughed when they put the memory in the Falcon because that means the droids memory is there watching every time they bully C3PO in the OT.

Since L3-37 was uploaded into the falcon, I guess she could have what she always wanted, for Lando to be inside of her.

You get the best Mauler when he’s really disgusted with something. This may be my favorite.

Slight Correction: Darth Maul didn't ignite his lightsabre for "No" reason... The reason is that if he didn't do that, this would be the only Star Wars film without a lightsabre in it, and we obviously couldn't have that.

Disney: "We now have a strong black female character in a supporting role - for 40 seconds. Diversity achieved." *Single tiny clap from midget*

Honestly, why NOT make Han a TIE fighter pilot? Wouldn't that have been fun to see? Maybe he was involved in a skirmish or something on Kashyyk (however you spell it) and shot down Chewie, and Han freed him after he was captured, thus leading to a life of crime as he evades the Empire. Maybe that's why he drops a lot of his shipments when he sees Star Destroyers, because he does not want to be found. "F*** it, we're having f u n . "

When the rebel leader took her helmet off at the end there was so much drama in the camera work I assumed she was supposed to be Woody's & Thandie's daughter. I thought, of course, the big twist is that their arch nemesis from the beginning was their estranged daughter. But then they didn't say that & I was really confused. I was even like, why aren't they saying she's his daughter?! I was getting mad. Then I realized she wasn't meant to be, that there was no big reveal, the camera zoom & hold drama was for no actual reason & it made me even more mad lol.

Can't wait for Fuel: A Star Wars Story.

I just keep telling myself, it's just fanfiction. It's all just fanfiction, and Legends is real canon.

49:07 yeah, it's acknowledged in the dialogue in Empire Strikes Back that Han won it from Lando "fair and square" but Disney is so incompetent they can't make any of these facts at least exciting upon watching.

The problem is, Solo was the beginning of a good thing, relative to Disney's aborted fetus of their own original content, which was a worrying turn making us (the old fans) worry they'd then return to forcing the sun-spoiled vaginal expulsion of the sequels down our throats in perpetuity. You see, a lot of what Solo had was content ported over from the old Expanded Universe material that had been flushed down the privy like so much Bantha fodder. Unfortunately, thanks to all the cooks in the kitchen Disney likes so much, a lot of it was either half-transferred or cut up and patched back together to the point of incomprehensiveness. The original backstory of Han Solo, as from the EU, was that, yes, he was from Corellia. He joined the Empire to get away from a life of working the shipping factories (Corellia was always a big ship building planet, home of the Corellia Engineering Corporation, or CEC, the makers of the YT-, YV-, VCX-, and many, many other production lines). He *was* a pilot, and a damn good one, though due to his natural charm and attitude, he got schlepped on backwater assignments and freighter duty, essentially a military truck driver instead of the hotshot TIE ace he very well could have been. It was in the course of that duty that he met Chewie. He was shipping cargo, but found out it was a shipment of Wookie slaves and refused to partake, freeing the slaves, for which Chewie's life debt was established. Han hates that Chewie thinks he owes him and is why he treats Chewie as an equal: because that's how he sees it. Deep down, Han was always a decent guy, but in a lawless galaxy, especially in the Outer Rim, nice guys finish last, hence the gruffness. He's world weary, seen a lot of bad things happen to good people, and at the point we meet him in A New Hope, he just wants to survive. He *did* win the Falcon from Lando in a Sabaac game, though Lando hadn't bet the Falcon specifically. He had bet *one* of his ships from his Jay Leno garage, hoping Han would pick one of the sleek pleasure yachts, not the beat to shit old YT-1300 he was secretly suping up into a personal smuggling ship. Lando *had* put a lot of work into the Falcon to make her the fastest ship in the galaxy, and he was beyond passed when Han chose her, and why Lando always gave him shit. The Kessel Run was always a measure of distance, as the entire length is dotted with black holes and other cosmic anomalies that make a straight shot impossible, most pilots opting the safer, more roundabout routes, giving all the hazards a wide berth. Han, being the slick amd daring pilot he is, was able to get closer than any other pilot, cutting his run down considerably in terms of overall distance. The spice mines of Kessel were, as the name might suggest, for spice, not hyperspace fuel. Lucas made a nod to Dune with spice, and is a drug. There are different kinds of spice, and there are different ways to process it for different purposes. Some medicinal and wholesome, mostly not. Think of it like the real world opium and morphine, though when refined its often a fine powder. Disney finally acknowledged this in the final season of Clone Wars, though for the purpose of Solo, they were probably trying to avoid having drugs in their family movie featuring violent death and slavery, as well as attempting to further legitimize the heresy that is the sequel trilogy. The original Kessel Run was done for Jabba, and when the Empire tried inspecting the Falcon, Han had to dump the entire load or risk arrest, leading to Han's debt in A New Hope. There were other things adapted from the original material, but a lot of it was either bastardized, misunderstood, or otherwise Frankensteined into the movie we got. Which is a real shame, because the original Han Solo story could have been a trilogy all by itself and been a good one. Part Star Wars,, part Firefly, part Pirates of the Caribbean, it had so much potential that was utterly wasted. Thank the maker Dave Filoni and Jon Favreau are more or less in charge and Kathleen "Karen" Kennedy is seemingly on the outs as Mickey finally seems to understand that fans have been MUCH happier with Dave and Jon.

I'm looking forward to the Jaba the Hut origin story beginning with little Jaba being fat shamed by sand children and him vowing revenge against his bounty-hunter half siblings...

"I want to restrict the writer's access to wookiepedia." If only they had listened.

*Moral of the Story:* Just read A.C. Crispin's Trilogy if you want a great story about Han's life before the Rebellion

There's a great old prequel book trilogy called the Han Solo Adventures. Those stories were great. There was also a great villain that was a perfect foil for Solo. A badass gunslinger who can outdraw and outshoot Han. It's been a very long time, but I would not be surprised if he was or at least part of the inspiration for Cad Bane.

Everyone's like: "GUYS, IT'S BETTER THAN LAST JEDI!!!!" and I'm like, yeah, it'd actually be more impressive to make a movie that's worse than Last Jedi than it is to make one that's better.

Qi’ra: “How does it work?” L3-37: “Oh, it works” K-2S0: “I find that answer vague and unconvincing”

Two reasons not to allow droids in a bar: They take up the space of an actual consumer/customer, and second, who wants to waste time entertaining a robot.

When Disney announced Solo... I honestly thought it was going to be a CGI animated movie with Harrison Ford voice acting. Sadly I was wrong

The next spin off- the "you wanna buy some death sticks" guy's struggle up until the point when he went home to rethink his life.

Of course Lando was upset L3 died. He grabbed the top half, but he'd been investing in upgrades to the bottom half.

"Not even the remasters are safe from the Mouse." 😂😂😂

"Admit it! You think that robots are just machines built by humans to make their lives easier!" - Bender

"I didn't even think you could ruin a ship, but you found a way Disney!" Gold...pure gold. I love it!

how to make ep9 work: 1. let them discover a long lost tomb 2. find an artifact in that tomb rey trying to activate it 3. then hearing the voice form the tomb as an ancient droid emerges "die meatbags" 4. proceed with hk-47 assasinating every meatbag and droid involved in the mess. Basically turning the movie into john wick.

I love Han as a character, the original trilogy being a big part of my childhood. Hell, I even had a toy blaster like his. That being said, I refuse to acknowledge this film has anything to do with Han from the original trilogy. I think of it more like a fever dream some random stormtrooper had after seeing Han run away screaming in the first death star. It makes this nonsense bearable.

Gotta love how all the events that made Han who he is in the OT transpired in like a week. Except getting the name solo. They really did not need to cram so much into this movie

Star Wars fans: Jar Jar is the worst thing about the Star Wars franchise Ron Howard, Jonathan Kasdan, Rian Johnson, Kathleen Kennedy: Hold our beer

Recruiter: "Whats your name son?" Applicant: "Richard........ I have no people...." Recruiter: "How did you get to the recruiting station?" Applicant: "On public transport..." Recruiter: "Ok, your name is: Dick Rider!"

25:15 Ah yes, explain strategy to the Wookiee who fought in the Clone Wars. This is the smartest writing, very good.

Insane to believe this was co-written by the man that brought us Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, and Raiders of the Lost Ark. This movie had potential to be so much better.

"and of course he's losing his shit as his favorite sex toy is running out of batteries" I cracked up too

WAIT-WAIT WAIT A MINUITE....the dice was from that girl she gave it to Han.... and Luke gave it to Leia to remind her of what that Han had a girl before her???

53:09 "You were desperate to SAP the living hell out of OT sequel trilogy and now you creating Sol Movies to individual characters as well?" Pans to Boba Fett with a nod Dude, how did you predict that (The Book of Boba Fett) so perfectly? !!!!!!

Loved it Mauler. I would enjoy hearing you read Dr. Suess books. Your voice soothes my soul.

I'm so done with Disney Wars that even the thought of pirating their movies feels like I'm being ripped off.

So Chewbacca's backstory is that he's a monster that eats people? Chewbacca?? That's like learning that Beethoven is actually a sequel to Cujo.

gotta say, the fact that you rightly point out that he didnt need to speak in wookie because chewbacca already understands english, was perfect. It's amazing to me how these little details seem to slip the minds of TEAMS of people, yet you are able to dissect these things as just one man. cheers

This movie is a dialogue check list. Everything mentioned in the OT just here like a awkward child staring at you

Take solace in the fact that if L3 is inside the falcon 1) her brain has been scrambled so much that it basically thinks in binary now and 2) C3PO talks to the ship in Empire and finds it the most irritating and nonsensical thing he's ever spoken to, which is coming from the most neurotic character in the OT.

Does Femputer's presence in the Falcon's computer explain C3PO's comment in Empire? "I don't know where your ship learned to communicate but it has the most peculiar dialect." Was the Falcon spouting SJW Feminist platitudes at him when he was just trying to ask about the hyperdrive?

I absolutely love the Futurama references. I love that show.

They haven’t fucked up yoda yet so I guess there’s still that to look forward to...

>References Eu material >EU is non canon just reminding us to be pissed.

I'm waiting breathlessly for "Watto: A Star Wars Story".

This was a great rundown. The entertainment value for this video is far greater than disney could ever hope to provide.

No one will probably ever read tho but, here goes….. I watch these rage vids about once a week. It’s a cathartic thing for me I suppose. Hearing someone who actually understands my disappointment is great. But most of all, it reminds me that I’m not crazy for absolutely detesting much of what’s offered by Hollywood nowadays. Cheers

Lando didn’t even try taking L3’s batteries out and blowing on them... PLOT HOLE! REEEEEE!

"I Rebe-" "L I A R" I laughed way to hard at that.

The worst part of Solo is that lots of his backstory is covered In books. No, not Disney books, pre-Disney EU books, which are actually pretty good, and care about the character.

Solo: A Star Wars Betrayal

If I wanted to see a Social Justice Droid, I can just go to a college campus.

Screen Junkies are pushing the narrative that people only criticized Rey's character because sexism so I linked them here to show you're just as harsh on Solo's complete lack of development. Thanks for you honest consistency Mauler.

To be clear, Solo was never really a bad guy in the OT. He wasn't a thief or a murderer or anything. He was just always out for himself (until he helped Luke at the end of ANH). You kind of make it sound like any time he does something good, it's against character, but he was never really *bad* in the first place. But yes, Solo was a failure as a story, mostly because Han doesn't really have a character arc. He doesn't go from trusting people to *not* trusting them. He's not naive at the beginning. He doesn't even really get his heart broken by Qi'ra, because he doesn't know he's going to betray him. As far as I can tell, he just ... never sees her again.

I am just finding all your older content and am really enjoying, thanks!

Now that Imperial March is actually IN the universe, I picture Darth Vader walking around with a Storm Trooper behind him with a boom box on his shoulder just blasting the shit out of it as they walk. Kinda like the Joker in the Burton Batman movie.

You know whats funny? Chewbacca in Revenge of the Sith was already with that ammo belt, they didnt even need to make an "origin" for that. If only they watched previous movies before making a new one...

The "fuck off kylo" made me laugh out loud... but its nearly 6am and i havnt slept yet 😂

"Please care about the dice" 😆😆😆🤭🤭🤭

Oh shit, Mauler is #9 on trending right now, nice!

Feels like the end of a relationship, where you don’t hate them, you just don’t care..

Thank you for making this. I was curious to see how bad this movie was, but I couldn't bring myself to sit through. Also the Futurama clips were perfectly placed. Absolute masterpiece of a video. Well done.

I absolutely love your channel. The analysis along with your humor is great. I have listened/watched the unbridal series a few times (minus the GoT as I never watched the series). While I wait for more videos, I have been listening to the EFAP shows and checking out the other peoples channels. Keep up the amazing work and building a fun community!

Find the Hyperfuel: A Starwars Story

L3's death was my favorite part of the movie as well.

At least Rouge One had some emotional impact.

"What in the holiest of fux did we just see" is probably the most accurate, and concise, summation of any movie ever.

I like how the people that made this movie didn't even watch the Prequels rather less Clone Wars. You know...because they already give us Chebacca's backstory. Chebacca trying to eat people, for any reason, is about as far from his character as you can get. Plus, Chewbacca is his actual name.

OMG, can't wait for Porgs: A Chewie's BBQ Cookbook!

Great work! Outstanding script! Stunning amount of editing. Spot on lip-reading. And your comments are right on the money. Loved it!

When I said I wanted an apology for The Last Jedi, this is not what I meant.

Maybe it's a good thing they don't want to make movies about the Old Republic. I'd hate to see them butcher Revan.

"Just stop you creativity vampires!" lol, perfect description...

two seconds and nearly lost it, subscribed lol