Some heavy character development happening here dude. Take all that you've learned from this and use it as fire for an opportunity. You have great things starting to happen in your life and you now have a chance to go beyond more than you've ever thought that you were capable of. To be the person you've always wanted to be. Authentic.

after 9 years it's over and i am a complete mess , i just don't want it to hurt anymore :) thanks for your video(s) i wish you and everyone a great day

Patience and persistence my friend. I, just like you, did not have models of healthy, loving relationships early in life. For me, the key to finding love was getting real with myself about what I really needed. I needed someone whose style of communication and level of affection was similar to my own. I had spent far too long trying to bend myself into a pretzel trying to "make things work" with numerous partners, leaping into the arms of anyone who would have me, and endlessly overthinking things and second-guessing myself - not to mention creating a false sense of urgency over "needing" a partner (or really wanting one). You're a great guy Adam. Don't spend too much time overthinking things and try to remain excited! Because the truth is, you *will* meet someone. And all your times past will seem less painful in the light of true love. Cheers :)

Yeah it is hard to be single sometimes but gradually you will accept your new routine without her being in it. I’ve been single for 2 years now and I didn’t go looking for anything after being hurt again. I’ve accepted the single hood and I prefer no drama and lies. Never say never of course but I needed this time to be by myself. It’s true that time is a great healer. (even though you never forget) Give yourself time ❤

It is so rough, mate. I struggle to find words to comfort you. It is so hard. Relationships is harder at our age. I have lost everyone, more or less.

Relationships only exaggerate your underlying mental state, work on yourself man. You can pull through.

Yeah, it’s tough. Those feelings, the energy that comes with it.. it’s hard to contain.. I’m in the same boat currently..😢

I think we tolerate a lot of anguish and incompatibilities with people because we want to be with someone, we want to feel loved, so we take all the punches. The best thing is to always walk away in those situations, but it always fucking hurts. Whether you're 17 or 37, feeling alone doesn't get any better.

Am struggling man. You speak some truth.

Hang in there bro, things will get better. I know a lot of guys who have had their hearts broken and lives shattered that have then gone on to an even better one. Focus on yourself and do things you enjoy till you get your groove back.

I hope for the pain in your heartbreak to ease in time. Take care of yourself.💙

Bringing it back into line with your story though, it can seem that its just one relationship after another failing, although you would expect that some women of a similar age to yourself might have actually grown up a bit and got over the hangups by their 30's at least. Perhaps not, in all cases. Maybe, one of the first signs that its time for change has been the better new job opportunity that has come along recently, perhaps the break up has formed part of this change process and is leading you down a better road to another door that is about to open, on the relationship front. I guess sometimes events are meant to happen, to allow one door to close and another to open afterwards. Looks as well, are really not the be all and end all. So many things these days can be done to completely make over someone's outside appearance and its not always as expensive as you might think. Changes of hairstyle, maybe growing some facial hair, a change of specs, trying out contact lenses, trying other clothing styles etc. Its amazing how things that might be considered as subtle and that won't make much difference actually cause a revolution in the dating game, which in turn boosts your confidence to move forward as well, up your game and pursue more lucrative avenues that you may not have entered before.

It’s difficult to find the one who can really connect and truly be open with. Never give up man there is always new experiences and moments every second you are alive. Just focus on yourself and maybe note down the problems of what happened and figure out what went wrong because of the self and what was wrong because of the partner and build on that. How can I change the way the self caused the problems and what can I do to influence and effect the next partner to make sure the partner doesn’t have problems. Always watching and supporting you man

I have a cat. Cats or dogs will always love you. Get one!

You are such a deep thinker and seem like lovely person. I hope you find a forever relationship. Hugs

This is one reason I chose to stay in my 7 year long relationship, because I could never date someone else again, too messy. Sorry about your break-up. 😢 Trust that time will heal all the wounds. Btw the "had psychotic issues bless her" comment was really funny haha. 😅

Hey Adam 👋 I've sent an email, I hope it gets to you. Just a quick thank you for your bravery and honesty 🙏 Keep shining and sharing, you really are an inspiration because you are truthfully you, and that's a gift to others. Melissa ✨️

I had a tough time last year with a long distance relationship..she was so in to me that she would say I could never get rid of her and that she would always be there and just as my closed heart began to open she changed her mind and ended things. I never really go the closure. It really is tough but I ha e to hope that one day I may find someone who.i can be truly myself with.

16:30 was a jumpscare jeez, I had my audio up and I thought your car blew up

Hi Adam, I've been watching your videos for some time now but have never commented as I've seen others commenting and they've pretty much said what I would have said and sometimes when you start to write something you find yourself cringing at it. But having just watched this video I felt I had to say something. I'm really sorry for the end of this situation. One of your recent videos seemed like you'd really turned a corner so it's sad that something has now happened that has halted that progress and no doubt left you wondering why certain aspects of your life starting to go well have to be "punished" by the breakdown of others. I probably haven't explained that very well but I think you can probably see what I'm getting at. I also have to resist that urge to do that very human thing of now moving on to MY problems, like it's going to somehow comfort you or something!?! All I will say is that I can relate to SO much of what you say in your videos that if you do want to chat privately then please do get in touch. Take care and know you're not alone.

Hey Adam thank you for sharing. ❤ Obviously I have zero idea about the dynamics (foundation) to your relationship, but I wonder is it really fully over. I wonder what your instinct tells you, and tells you what you should be doing right now... When I have consulted my instinct in the past it has been rarely wrong, and at the end of the day trusting ourselves is what it's all about coupled with doing our best for others and the more apt we are, the more we bring to the table... My closest and most rewarding relationships have always been "friends first" and anything else is a bonus. It is a foundation of closeness that weathers all manner of storms, each being there at times of each others need. Sometimes just listening is enough to unburden someone of their troubles, that and sharing a warm, consoling embrace of understanding and compassion... Don't know if any of this has been of some help. I hope it has. 🙂

Come to the point relationships for me are off the table.

when did you meet?

Go read How to be 3% Man by Coach Corey Wayne. Your problems will evaporate. The stuff he's offering are 100% free. Good luck mate.

16:31 Jump scare

Are you aware of what you're doing in the lead up to these same breakpoints in a relationship? You have to work on those before putting yourself through the same thing over and over again. I know its hard but the second she said she wanted a break, you should have never spoke to her again. No text, no phonecalls, no meet ups. Ghost.

mate remeber yourself first

I notice a really big mistake you make. You say you're not good at expressing feelings, which may have been a great contributor to her breaking up with you. Then, you refrain from telling her how you feel about the break up. So you do it AGAIN. She is left feeling like you don't care and that she made the right decision.