You're welcome to subscribe to my main channel for more content including full podcast episodes: kzfaq.infovideos

My husband told me when we got engaged "I don't believe in this 50/50 business in marriage... I believe in both trying to give 100%...so that if one day you can't quite make your '50%', it's okay.. I'll have it covered for you" ❤️ the sweetest and one of the most helpful quotes in our marriage. He really is one of the good ones 🙏🏻❤️😍

To have Dr Peterson in the world at this time is such a blessing .

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you ‘ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.” ~Socrates

Met a couple that was married for over 60 years. I asked the husband what is the key to such a long marriage. I'll never forget his response. He turned to me as far as his body allowed him to turn in his chair and said "son, I don't hear so good." Such a powerful response.

'Telling the truth' is about respectful honesty, not about hurting the other or being abrasive.

50 years here for my husband and I. Honesty, laughter, being willing to step up and carry more than the other when your spouse is tired and hurts, saying thank you and a good debate.. I married my best friend. Best decision I ever made.

It's a red flag if your partner won't tolerate you standing up to them.That person can't be reasoned with.

JP seems to fit far better on a morning coffee talk show than in the trenches with culture warriors. He’s so peaceful and introspective; I’m always happy to see him in nurture mode, not combat.

My grandparents have been married for over 77 years, my parents will celebrate 50 years next month and my husband and I are close to the 20 year mark. 💕

You are spot on in your summary of a relationship. We have been married for 46 years. My loving relationship with my wife is the most important and best part of my life. In 46 years you experience most of the challenges life throws at us. To me honesty, fidelity, mutual trust, communication and planning tomorrow and into the future has made our relationship something I wish every couple could experience.

We've been married 53 years. We have never stopped dating. Once a week if only coffee from a thermos in a neighbouring park. Conversation improves when you are away from your comfort zone. And we do not fight. Fights have winners and losers. Devastating in a relationship. We have conflicts which we resolve. One time it took us 3 days and nights. No sleep. Went to work, came home, talked. It was that important. Finally we were both content. That was 50 years ago. 8 years after that conflict we could not remember what it had been about. Paul Tillich wrote that you marry for the conflict. And that one becomes the right person for each other over time. Life is change. How it differs from the rocks.

The key is maturity. And stop any unnecessary drama. Accept, learn and evolve. Think what’s good for both of you, not just yourself. Lastly, happiness is an inside job. It’s not your partner’s job to fill your happiness. Your partner or spouse is just a bonus. Be grateful for the love.

My husband and I just celebrated 43 years of marriage yesterday! People are always shocked when we say how many years - I think it's because people give up too easily these days, instead of fighting for the marriage.

I've been married for 25 years. It's been very tough. A lot of crying, laughter, struggles, etc. My advice is not to expect too much from your spouse. Try hard to fall in love again and again!

A powerful statement, "It takes a lot of trust to have a real conversation about what you need and want".👏👍♥️

Wife and I are opposites but complement eachothers. Once heard a couple who was married 75years. They were in their 90s. The man said the key to marriage was "not falling out of love at the same time." We all have bad moments and argue. But we never go to bed without saying we love eachother and kiss goodnight. I get mad or hurt sometimes as well as her but never effects our love and bond. 4 beautiful kids and 15years so far and I love and admire her more every day. ❤️ learned to listen to her better and carve out alone time to reconnect and show her she is loved.

What changed my life was when someone said "Do you want to be right or happy?" It put everything in perspective. I only stand my ground on extreme moral issues. Most things are open to compromise.

After 10 Years of Married Life, the most important key i feel to a Happy Marriage is communication. It means Sharing everyting from thoughts, feelings and expectations. For that sometimes we play couple questions games like “Lovify”. In this game, we have to guess what our partner expects. With small efforts, we are constantly improving our relationship ❤

When Dr Peterson talks about his wife Tammy I admire him more for all he has said and expresses his love for her. They are a beautiful story.

We agree. Negotiate and plan together. Married 52 years.

My husband is ALWAYS honest about what I wear. I want his opinion & then I make my own decisions. He doesn't like my pink blouse with puffy sleeves, but I wear it anyway.👚😉 However, I don't wear it on our dates. I wear things that he loves to see me in. 🥰

Important to listen to a potential spouse's voice - in sweetness and in anger. Amazing how terrifying a voice can be, used malevolently. Listen to her or him when you have a spat, before you marry! What you hear could frighten you, and serve as a warning.

My great-grandmother told my mother the trick was to never expect your spouse will change. Further, those annoying quirks they have? They will only become more annoying lol but they stayed married until he died! That always stuck with me. My parents gave me a lot of marriage training though, starting when I was about 11. What to look for, what a red flag would be, etc, and how to spot those things before you're too invested in someone (because you will totally lie to yourself lol)

I asked my older brother once how he’s stayed married so long- like what the secret is and he said “you just work it out” 😆 idk why but that has been the most profound marriage advice I had ever heard ♥️

My mentor in College worked with Francis Shaeffer for 20 years in L'Abri - his number one advice in finding a husband/wife is to marry someone who you can fight with and "fights fairly"

Nearly 30yrs with my wife. Compromise has been what's kept us together. Like the song says, " I start walking your way, you start walking mine. We meet in the middle" Trust, faithfulness, and envisioning yourselves together 30, 40, 50 years down the road. If you can't see growing old with that person, let them go. So they, and you, might find that someone.

After 51 years of happy marriage I can attest to the wisdom of this man. He is wise & spot on!

I debate with my girlfriend at least every week. Some people would say that that is unhealthy. But I would say that it has helped us both learn to negotiate and listen. I learned about negotiation when reading 12 Rules for Life and he explains that marriage is like 2 cats being chained together in a barrel. Everything is worth fighting for.

I've been married for 38+ years and quite simply the best advice is to always put the OTHER persons best interest first. Obviously, you both have to do it. But you can't go wrong, I promise.

It's one thing to discusses different opinions with honesty, allowing for civil disagreement, versus someone attacking your character and diminishing you as a person. One is healthy conflict, the other is toxic. As always, thanks Dr. JP.

My summary: Find someone: 1. Based on attractiveness. Stay in shape, both parties 2. Someone who's interestingly different from you, but not so different that you can't communicate. A little bit of tension, trouble, mystery and combativeness. Keep your interest heightened, do not get bored. 3. Someone you can spar with, discuss your problems, get input and cognitive power. Someone you can trust and be open with. The ability to exchange opinions forthrightly and tell each other the truth. Someone that you can negotiate with a. tell you what they think and what they want b. continually update c. build a view of the future 4. Be romantic and intimate. Work at that. Make time for each other. You need to spend 90 minutes a week with your partner a. telling each other about your life b. what needs to be done to keep the household running c. mutually acceptable vision of next weeks or months d. spend intimate time together once a week or twice and that has to be negotiated

This really helps me get over my ex. Couldn't have basic objective conversation about reality much less difficult conversations.

I've been a Marriage and Family Therapist for 36 years. After observing a number of couples that appeared to have affectionate and amiable relationships (not in a counseling setting), I asked what their "secret" was. Certain behavior patterns popped up over and over: Respectful treatment of each other (especially in conflict), patience, gentleness and kindness. Dr. Tim Keller has an excellent book on marriage- "The Meaning of Marriage." Highly recommend it.

I'm happy that Dr. Peterson was born in my generation, he's helped me with so many acts in life and is amazing how accurate he is with all his analogies..

honesty allows authenticity, just make sure you're honesty is borne out of love. It's possible to honestly say mean things to someone and not care about them.

I think finding someone who understands what they are getting into is very important. Barely a year into mine, my partner went chatting with her ex after I told her not to do such and denied it even when the evidence was right before me. Words cannot express her denial and coupled with the fact that she is a professing Christian has given me trust issues. I have come to the conclusion that trust must be earned. The first point of trust is through their phone. If your to be partner or partner is very peculiar about their phone as if they work for the CIA, just forget it. Infidelity kills marriage and will forever kill it.

The man is a legend. I thank God for blessing this time in our existence with Jordan Peterson. He is an absolute necessity.

We've been together almost 30 years. But doesn't feel like it. Things I know that work: respect for the other person's perspective/needs/wishes. Compromise helps a lot (within your values). Trust.

The man’s wisdom And mentorship is so needed. Mr. Peterson please don’t ever STOP caring about the state of our affairs♥️ you are touching so many lives

My husband and I have been together for 10 years, something I love about our relationship is that we continue to make each other laugh. His wittiness was what attracted me to him in the first place, wittiness takes intelligence. I think we challenge each other all the time with our come backs and ability to still make each other laugh.

Keep short accounts. "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger..." and being able to say "I'm sorry" and "forgive me" and common acts of courtesy are essential ingredients to any successful marriage.

I just love Jordan Peterson’s frankness and bluntness in talking about relationships, e.g., how important it is to be able to tell each other the truth, and to be able to spar with each other. I keep learning new important things.

Dr. Peterson, THANK YOU! My husband abandoned us years ago, when my 3 children were in college. We lost it all..including hope and trust in people. I send your videos every day to them. Thank you for being a father figure to my kids. They just love you! I am an evangelical Christian who prays for you and your family constantly. Faith in Jesus only, salvation , health and protection to you and your household. I love you like family, honestly I do. I can only pay with my prayers to the Soverign God. THANK YOU! ☆Please talk about dating in your 60s, loneliness is so sad and paralizing.

The best advice I can give is the advice my mother gave me: choose your partner wisely. Choose someone who is kind and responsible and thoughtful and loyal. So many people pay attention to all the wrong things. Sexual chemistry, good looks, these are the least important things to true love and lasting marriage.

I always look nice no matter where I go. Especially going out with my hubby and his friends. I want to look nicer than other wives. We should take pride in how we look. Inside and outside.

Having your input on marriage publicly.......may change the world one piece at a time. Its been so long since anyone defended marriage.......it almost became not cool to defend it. The most sacred thing on planet earth. Bravo JP!!!!!! Keep going.....you have an amazing platform. Why others have not taken the opportunity is stunning.

Thank God for you Dr.Peterson. Finally someone that makes sense. I always say “make it make sense” regarding politics or relationships and you do. I’m also a psychologist and you make me proud to be a psychologist!

so true - to be authentic in a relationship or marriage and feel you can share your opinion and understand each other

Hey there! Great video title! It's so true that many people overlook this important factor when it comes to a happy marriage. The key ingredient we often forget about is effective communication. It's essential to openly and honestly express our thoughts, feelings, and needs with our partner. So, let's remember to keep those lines of communication open and flowing for a strong and thriving marriage. Awesome content, keep it up!

this man words are pure gold, the TECHNICAL TRUE at its best, you can just feel it

Mr Peterson is a voice of reason that we desperately need in theese shallow times ❤️

I asked a friend once who had been married 40 years how she made the relationship last so long. She said, “Don’t get divorced.”

I'm seeing JP speak tomorrow night, and I am having difficulty sleeping from the excitement of hearing him speak live. It feels like Christmas as a kid.

He’s so spot on about so much in life.

"They have to be satisfied when you get what you want which is also a very difficult thing to manage." A really important nugget of wisdom buried there. I get the feeling a lot of people haven't really worked out what they want so they are easily persuaded by others by things they're told they "should" want. How many people pursued a particular career because their parents pushed them in that direction rather than an inherent interest or desire? How many people had kids because of societal and partner expectations rather than inherently want them? And then there are those who are motivated by the chase rather than the attainment of their goals. Great if they're some corporate visionary like Steve Jobs but I'd never want to live with someone like that, it'd be too exhausting!

My spouse and I have been married 20+ years. Mutual respect, honesty and humour are key factors to a successful union. Yes, like any couple, we argue. If we weren’t honest, did not respect each other, or could not laugh to ease tension, then we simply wouldn’t be together.

My wife and I get along great and agree on almost everything. So we get to spend more time doing things that we both love, and less time disagreeing. He's spot on about scheduling time for sex, though. If it's important enough that it can end marriages, it's important enough to be a priority in your relationship.

The way Jordan & Tammy talk about their relationships is so beautiful, if only more romantic relationships were like this, the world would truly be a better place ❤️

Intimacy and effort. Those 2 things are so easy to let go when you become comfortable in a marriage.

Love it! If only we could have the courage to be so honest

I have been married for 32 years. I have always wanted a level of emotional intimacy that my husband cannot provide. I'm not sure if he's unwilling or incapable. I discovered that if I wanted to stay married to him I was going to need to get my emotional needs met elsewhere so I have good (mostly women) friends. I could have run to someone else and had an affair. I could have divorced. My husband is a good man, though, and has always taken his responsibility to be there for and provide for our family seriously. He is always kind and good to me but I do have to tell him what I want. I have chosen to love him as he is rather than be dissatisfied with not having the type of deep conversations I thrive on. I focus on gratitude for the many good things he does for me and try to help him out as much as possible. We do negotiate and have had to work thru some pretty tough times. Having a shared religion (and believing in/accepting/conveying forgiveness and admitting our sins towards each other and not building up resentments) and worldview have been our glue. And his sense of humor. I'm not as happy as I could be if we had a deeper relationship but I am not unhappy either. I figured out a long time ago that my happiness is my responsibility. As someone who has suffered through some pretty severe depressions, I'm glad my husband stuck with me when I was hard to live with.

Thanks Jordan P. for bringing reality back into marriage.

Spot on. All engaged people need to see and hear this video.

Trying to find someone who isn't selfish is a momentous challenge. It all starts with yourself first.

He is extremely interesting in his approach, articulating very complicated things in a way that is easy to follow and relate to. Life is complicated because human beings are multi-faceted and you can get along with someone in some areas but not so well in others. You have to find a way to get along with the other person without giving up being yourself.

Thank you for your teachings Internet Dad!

For healthy relationship I think one should get ready to be patient and tolerant under all circumstances. One should leave no bad impression in the memory

He’s a smart man and an amazing communicator. Listen to him.

I appreciate this man so much. I learn so much listening to him and get inspired to grow and become better in my relationships

Debate is good. Fundamental disagreements on values is a recipe for disaster.

Thank you - as always Dr. Petersen.. So grateful for your voice in this world..🙏👌😊

I love that Mr. Peterson mentioned trust as being a huge element. I believe trust is everything.

I Love U Mr Jordan Peterson. ❤️❤️ Thank U For The Lovely Advice As Always. It Helps With My Day To Day.

oh man. my husband is Dutch, and they are so brutal when it comes to telling the truth. As first i struggle until i learn also to say what's on my mind.

Trust is definitely one of, if not the most important components of a thriving relationship. The truth shall set you free.

Jordan Peterson is a maddening combination and this version is what keeps me coming back…

Thank you Dr. Peterson

I totally agree Dr. Peterson! Most people don't understand that intelligent dialogue is essential. It's not about truth telling exactly..it's about being compatible in intelligence and interest.

Love his intellect, and honesty

It’s really important to understand why you’re together and the lasting power of it, that can transcend time. Everything falls out from reminding yourself of that - love, communication, attractiveness, patience, debate, loyalty, roles and responsibilities, compromises, financials, intimacy - through thick and thin. About to hit 20 years and have had all variations of each.

I’ve been married to my husband for nearly 23 years. We’ve been separated for some time now contemplating divorce. We love each other deeply, but drifted apart due to some infidelity and addiction with underlying childhood emotional trauma. Dr. Peter son’s videos have given me hope for forgiveness and the ability to finally heal and move forward and get the life and love we deserve once again.

After I started to be brutally honest at (almost) all times, I learned that while the number of social contacts I had diminished, the quality of interactions improved considerably. Even at the workplace, after initial setbacks, it improved my career and strengthened my profile.

Yep. I was married for 42 years and discovered my ex had lied to me for most of those years. It was and continues to be very painful. Divorced for 2 years now.

I agree. Dr. Peterson 8s truly a blessing!!!

Healthy disagreements mean that you discuss and work out some sort of Compromise that is best for both parties. My dad always told me to never resort to name calling, and that advice has always stuck with me. Your ideal partner is someone you respect, so you should treat them with respect.

I love when my hubby says I look nice. 🥰

Have to let go of the expectation that as you get older your relationship with your spouse is always peaceful. Conflict is necessary to work things out. Learn to negotiate and fight well. Thanks, Dr. Peterson.

Totally agree with you Jordan!👍

My husband can’t even tell me what he wants for dinner communication is on the lowest level he’ll always say if you want to which makes me scream inside

What makes people happy is being themselves. The more you be yourself, the happier you feel. You want to be in a relationship where the other person gets to be who they are in their essence. Same for you. Depending on where you are on your journey, you will attract relationships that will prompt you to be more of who you are and it's a flowing river through life experiences. If the idea is to skip heartbreak, you take enough time to be who you are to a considerable degree and then if you enter into relationship, you will be able to achieve more flow cuz you have achieved enough flow within yourself

The Great and All Powerful Oz has spoken!!

This is so good and so true.🙏 Love this. 🔥♥️🔥

My Father always told me find a man you can still like as your friend when you find yourself in moments you can't bring yourself to love him. Friendship with your partner is more important than love. Love is a fleeting emotional response. Friendship takes effort every day.

Grandpa said his mom told him the secret to 60+years of marriage was "one day at a time". He also said his father never argued with her and never raised his voice.

Thank you Mr Peterson for great advices

Jordon your love and respect for your wife speaks volumes on many levels of honesty and respect is what true love is. If those factors are not set in place, then it wont work, Your right a Husband and a wife or relationship should always be built on trust and respect, with unconditional love. If there is conditions with I do this for you, so then I expect it back from you, Will never work. Love is the main factor of what holds a marriage together and if one looks up love the definition is unconditional love is the key to a long lasting relationship. You and your wife have something very special and its nice to see how you don't have to pretend, and how you both share your inner most feeling and still look at eachothers imperfections and admire and respect and love for eachother is the key.

Dr Peterson. Is very down to earth . I dont agree with all he says . But, I agree with much he says .

I believe professor in my opinion that when you keep your relationship glowing and growing all the time it's a healthy habit and good exercise that its better for health as well when you stay in love it's healthy habit too with your partner :) ...But one thing i always hung on whenever i watched something about your personal story and i watched attentively it always cut and want to watched the golden story you had :) ......Anyway God bless you Professor Jordan Peterson and more power

Lovely chat with Jordan Peterson