Transcript, Assembly Speech (war on Terra) | Best of r/HFY | 1881

Transcript, Assembly Speech (war on Terra) | Best of r/HFY | 1881 | Humans are Space Orcs

Рет қаралды 100,863

Күн бұрын

Original Story :
/ oc_transcript_assembly...
New Channel : bit.ly/3NJZFxL
Playlist All : bit.ly/3oYiuTf
Playlist 100 : bit.ly/3oZwBr7
Want to support Channel?
Patreon : / agrosquerrils
Paypal : www.paypal.me/agrosquerril
KoFi : ko-fi.com/agrosquerrilnarrates
Merch : teespring.com/stores/asn-3
{TimeStamps}
00:00 Intro
00:06 Transcript, Assembly Speech (war on Terra)
#ScienceFiction #Storytime #SciFi
----Socials----
Email : Agrosquerrils@gmail.com
Twitter : / agrosquerrils
Discord : / discord
Rumble : rumble.com/c/c-1379116
Podcast is Called : ASN Humans Are Space Orcs , HFY and other stories
--------------
This Story is Classified as HFY or Humanity Feck, Yea , but what does the Mean?
-------------
HFY is a story/series that takes a “human element” in either humanity or an “other” (race/species or object) that exists in a “setting” (future or other world/universe) with varying levels of culture, technology, society and history that help show in some shape or form the potential good or bad for humanity’s race/culture. In These stories Humans are often referred to as Human, Humanity, Deathworlder, Hellwolder in reference to the human planet of origin , Earth. This planet is seen by most of the universe as a place where only death and chaos can survive.
-------------
Taken from the FAQ of the r/HFY subreddit.
Humans Are Space Orcs (HASO) or Humans Are (Fantasy Race) Are used as a guide when writing.
In these Stories we normally View humans like the other races view orcs in a Fantasy Novel. We (Humans) share the same characteristics and personalities as orcs. Humans are normally treated as the outsiders and barbarians. Humans tend to be underestimated as well in these stories. Unlike Humanity Feck Yea , these don't always put a positive spin on humans\humanity sometimes looking at the darker side of human and humanity from the perspective of aliens.
---------------------------
Thank you to Tier 4 and 5 Patreons and Channel Members:
Zachary McGee
Bryan Hanley
tommygun1119
Robothaus
B-Robbo
Trevor Smith
Elim Tevir
Brian Means
DoomSnek
Ithilia
John Shafer
William Howard
LanScaper
john silva
Brenton Verlo
H-Town_F2
Casper Arnholtz
Cam Maxwell
Ryan Barkenhagen
AustisticAlaskan
Thirg
thatguy101
FallenAngeI
James Kay
Ágoston Szabó
angry t1t5
MrBishop077
Hollisister
Dragzoon W.R.E
It＇sDifficultToPronounce
Lord Azrekahl
Arcalian

Пікірлер: 172

@triedtherest Жыл бұрын

The Humans stopped fighting each other....RUN!

@reddeathstar2428 Жыл бұрын

If humanity stopped fight for 5 minutes we would already be a solar empire

@anondabomb Жыл бұрын

@@reddeathstar2428 We need a common enemy to fight for us to stop fighting each other.

@richardmiranda1908 Жыл бұрын

@Nad Senoj I like to imagine that everyone in the galaxy is minding their business, then a random race attacked the humans, and everyone in the surrounding clusters would stop their wars, conflicts, and ready either their evacuation plans or "help humans so we aren't the target" plans.

@WingManFang1 Жыл бұрын

Change that one song’s lyrics from “here comes the Boom,” to “Here comes your Doom”

@jhnshep Жыл бұрын

@@reddeathstar2428 Oh what was the film, right 'Independence day' Syrian, Egyptian, Iraq and Israeli fighter pilots working together lol

@nigredoooalgown6245 Жыл бұрын

If you have 3 humans in a room, you have 6 different opinions.

@doctorbright1065 Жыл бұрын

More if they invite their friends Smith and Wesson.

@theenderdestruction2362 Жыл бұрын

@@doctorbright1065 Smith and Wesson are good friends

@ronjhonson-oq8hx Жыл бұрын

or smith and Wesson drugged up relatives Smyth and Methson.

@reduande Жыл бұрын

Wrong. 3x3 is 9. 😉

@nigredoooalgown6245 Жыл бұрын

@@reduande What...?

@CidGaius Жыл бұрын

Fix bayonets? Fix bayonets. *bayonet intensifies*

@zacharyhawley1693 Жыл бұрын

Instructions unclear thought you said Bayonetta. If anyone asks the portal to hell was already here when we got here.

@ianhogben3472 Жыл бұрын

Happy gas mask sounds

@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 Жыл бұрын

@@zacharyhawley1693 Of course it was, we didn't make the portal to hell, it was those damn space elves that murder-fucked a chaos god into existence.

@petercooper456 Жыл бұрын

To be fair it was an amazing party

@Gow-13510 Жыл бұрын

Guardman! Fix Bayonet! Be ready for blood!

@NearlyH3adlessNick Жыл бұрын

Alien species: thinks humans are uncivilised and _"Not a threat to their technology"_ Humans: *We fought* _countless_ *wars with sticks and stones!* what the hell do you think I'm gonna do with a strapped together spaceship?!

@ckl9390 Жыл бұрын

And we defeated many and various mega-fauna, including apex hyper-predators, with those sticks, stones, and teamwork.

@NearlyH3adlessNick Жыл бұрын

@@ckl9390 we joke about the "power of friendship", but ancient humans proved it can massacre some pretty big stuff if you put your mind to it!

@snidecommenter7117 10 ай бұрын

And it is held together with duct tape! So let's dance

@Maddog3060 Жыл бұрын

"But warlord, if they are that fierce, why are the Valiant still alive?" "Because humans have done this sort of thing so often that they actually have categories for it. The Valiant had provoked something called 'Total War', but not 'Absolute War', which would have been xenocide. I sincerely hope it is something the universe shall never see."

@silasmarvan1189 Жыл бұрын

*Laughs In heavy bolter*

@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 Жыл бұрын

@@silasmarvan1189 Brother, get the flamer, the *HEAVY* flamer.

@anadaere6861 Жыл бұрын

@@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 WE ARE THE ANGELS OF DEATH

@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 Жыл бұрын

@@anadaere6861 Our enemies hide in metal boxes, THE FOOLS, *THE COWARDS* WE... We should take away, their metal boxes.

@involuntaryanalysis Жыл бұрын

Yeah, that's when we break in to the "DO NOT F*CK WITH THIS" armories.

@JohannLudwigEdel Жыл бұрын

Me against my brother, my brother and me against our cousin, the three of us against the world.

@number3766 Жыл бұрын

Humanity: YOU KILL ME? NO, ONLY I KILL ME! *proceeds to maul "opponent"*

@sametsahin6863 Жыл бұрын

"The humans would throw themselfs at the valiant twice their size with blades attached to their slug throwers" In the Turkish war of independence when the forces that had retreated said "we were out of ammo" the leader Mustafa Kemal Atatürk said "you still had your bayonets didnt you?"

@collinfulling3223 7 ай бұрын

Chesty Puller’s first reaction to a flamethrower was, “Where do you put the bayonet?”

@oiwithyou Жыл бұрын

"I hate my neighbors, but the only thing I hate more than them is something that makes me work with my neighbors!" I love these sort of stories involving primitive individualist humans who find a common alien enemy and then just won't stop until they've won through annihilation.

@gmailquinn Жыл бұрын

Me against my brother. Me and my brother against our father. Me, my brother and my father against the world. Smt like that

@DSiren Жыл бұрын

OVER THERE! OVER THERE! SEND THE WORD,THAT YOU'VE HEARD, OVER THERE! THAT THE YANKS ARE COMING, THE YANKS ARE COMING, THE DRUMS RUM-TRUMMING OVER THERE, SO PREPARE, SAY A PRAYER, SEND THE WORD SEND THE WORD TO BEWARE... WE'LL BE OVER, WE'RE COMING OVER, AND WE WON'T COME BACK TILL IT'S OVER, OVER THERE

@nooneofimportance2110 Жыл бұрын

Now THAT was a good story. Never give us a reason to unite. That's what causes extinction.

@christopherbravo1813 Жыл бұрын

I gotta say, this version of humanity is the most akin to legit Space Orcs out of any iteration I have seen thus far.

@gorasul12 Жыл бұрын

Its impressive and scary to see humans go from the individual mind to the tribal one 😆

@carlfromtheoc1788 Жыл бұрын

"In one battle the humans caused The Valiant to retreat and then chased them for more than three days. They relied on an ancient hunting technique to rout and then utterly destroy some of the finest troops The Valiant had. I asked a human officer about this form of total warfare, he said, 'like Sherman we are going to march to the sea and defeat the so called Valiant.'.""

@ejedwards988 Жыл бұрын

If the humans stop fighting each other, all you can do is get out of their way or join them. If you are the reason they have banded together, you can not fight them. They will bleed themselves dry to see you dead. If you are the reason they had banded together, you can not run. They are persistence predators capable of chasing you for hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades, or even centuries.

@carlcameron8476 Ай бұрын

Don't listen to him aliens do you have a chance to run you should run run as fast as you can yes we like to chase our prey

@WallNutBreaker524 Жыл бұрын

"Humanity unites under one banner, due to a common enemy, their wrath focused on one enemy, their hate, their anger, their weapons of war, are coming, to those of which are the target of the Humans hate, Run, your time is running out."

@jacobcombs1106 Жыл бұрын

I can sum human behavior as it applies to his role as a war lord up in a few phrases to help him and his kind understand us. "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes" "Fuck around and find out" "Don't make us downgrade the Geneva convention to the Geneva suggestions" "It's not a war crime the first time"

@erankaguri8621 Жыл бұрын

I really like that last one.

@jacobcombs1106 Жыл бұрын

@@erankaguri8621 I first heard it from the fat electrician.

@stratometal 11 ай бұрын

Quack bang, out!

@ravenmoon5111 11 ай бұрын

My favorite is the last one. It says to the enemy, “Have a look at this list before you decide to fight us. We had to make a law against each one to keep us from doing it again.”

@jacobcombs1106 11 ай бұрын

@@stratometal hit him with a hard reset of their ooda loops, 60% of the time works everytime.

@driverr988 11 ай бұрын

We fight each other because we are family. Competition between sibling is completely normal. [Neighborhood bully beats up youngest sibling] All of humanity

@katesauve3698 4 ай бұрын

Sounds about right

@ianhogben3472 Жыл бұрын

Humans are a non neutonian fluid

@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 Жыл бұрын

I like how KZfaq has a translate to English button on this post, that just corrects the spelling mistake.

@tix2260 Жыл бұрын

@@kiritotheabridgedgod4178 it’s beautiful

@driverr988 11 ай бұрын

Fluid, until external stimulus is applied 😈😜😁👍

@boxcutterkaede1686 8 ай бұрын

That's *strangely* accurate.

@RealArcalian Жыл бұрын

Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo We do not want to unify. Don't force us to. I really enjoy stories where human's don't unify....outside of great need. Most accurate, I think.

@christopherbravo1813 Жыл бұрын

same

@ravenmoon5111 Жыл бұрын

Don't piss off humanity. We may trade like Ferengi but we fight like Klingons

@stratometal 11 ай бұрын

And some troops behave like Jem'Hadar, glad to find death, after taking a puff of that white powder.

@ravenmoon5111 11 ай бұрын

@@stratometal yes. We are seeing this in the Storm Z units of Russia

@stratometal 11 ай бұрын

@@ravenmoon5111 Nazi's did the same thing with meth, sometimes human soldiers just stop giving a frak and when they do, they resort to crack.

@ravenmoon5111 11 ай бұрын

@@stratometal you are right. Japanese Kamakzi pilots would have memorials for themselves before they took off, knowing they were going to die

@Kualinar 4 ай бұрын

Not really. We often make both look like bumbling rookies.

@MethuselahWinter Жыл бұрын

“We are like siblings in one big family, Warlord. We fight, bicker and sometimes even bully each other. While we didn’t care about boundaries in our early years, as we’ve matured we’ve learned to not cross a line though, and if we ever come close we stop and apologize.” “However, should it ever happen that a person from school, a colleague at work, or a stranger on the street attacks and harms our sibling, we’ll that just won’t do. Only we can fight with our family, sir. Anyone else who tries will find that out the hard way.”

@Resomius Жыл бұрын

I always love the thinking about humans primitive slugthrowers. "Yes. They are weak and can not penetrate your energy shields. But will it hold if we throw 10? 100? 100.000? Billions? If we throw slugs the size of your main thrusters? If we throw Thousands of them? If we throw ships, meteors, Moons? You may survive some of them. But our slugs are like our people. A never ending Storm!"

@ragnarian Жыл бұрын

Reminds me of a quote from 'tales from the Terrain republics' "Oh look, they're throwing spears" -last words of the admiral of the alien empire

@ssocar96 Жыл бұрын

Humans are good at throwing rocks

@JEL625 Жыл бұрын

There is always a bigger rock to throw, and it can always be thrown faster too.

@involuntaryanalysis Жыл бұрын

Peace, or annihilation, pick one.

@a-aronlincoln6309 Жыл бұрын

Always bring your bayonets lads.

@renaissancepress247 Жыл бұрын

Humans are space orcs perfectly done. Need more Dakka!!

@allenmorgan1007 Жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Disembodied Voice!

@NearlyH3adlessNick Жыл бұрын

Huzzah!

@julesmasseffectmusic Жыл бұрын

Warning humanity is at peace. Repeat warning humanity is at peace.

@alexandriatempest Жыл бұрын

I respect all the HFY stories I've heard. I love some of them even. In this one though, I see my people in.

@mheermance 5 ай бұрын

"If brute force isn't working, you're not using enough of it." Issac Arthur

@bobbyharris1725 5 ай бұрын

"If the ocean moves as one; No land is safe. "

@rohesilmnelohe Жыл бұрын

It's like France and UK.. Always at eachothers throat. Until the Germans show up.

@gioandres205 Жыл бұрын

When you make the Germans and the Polish work together, you know you are dead already but death is afraid of recovering your body.

@Jesus_Offical Жыл бұрын

Indeed

@Calix_Beowolf Жыл бұрын

Looks like we found jesus

@hawkforce4295 7 ай бұрын

I am a veteran. Big Red 1 !! And I have to agree with this and most of these stories. I have been listening to for 3 days and as messed up as humans are, I want to believe! I want to believe that we are or will be everything these stories say about us! It’s why to me we’re all one RACE! HUMAN RACE!!! We need to figure this out!!

@kurtismiller9544 Жыл бұрын

For the Skald and his family

@yomogami4561 Жыл бұрын

well done. i enjoyed the story

@snidecommenter7117 Жыл бұрын

A common theme in human history. During the time of Alexander the Great, what is now India, was a hodge podge of little kingdoms that were always at war with each other. Until Alexander attacked. Then they unified to fight him.

@alexandermathieson4774 Жыл бұрын

the enemy of my enemy is my friend, but he is still my enemy.

@purpledevilr7463 Жыл бұрын

The thumbnail of this video is space British parliament. I recognise it from a Stellaris modx

@elfeater1760 Жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm11!

@nos2342 Жыл бұрын

To please the algorithm is all

@victortahlor4038 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for the reading

@CHRF-55457 Жыл бұрын

Uhh bud da bum bum... Congrats, you've just united humanity. And they're looking quite a bit vengeful for the murder of their civvies.

@klappstock943 Жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm the story and the voice

@bethanycearadoran-smith4192 8 ай бұрын

I really need to know where the Enterprise aquarium decoration came from ❤

@TheRandyWanker 8 ай бұрын

Who said this I don't remember: Me against my brother. Two of us against our cousin. Three of us against the Universe!

@quinnhasse9170 Ай бұрын

it was some desert tribe

@AlexanderBushi Жыл бұрын

Thanks. Regards

@SergeyWaytov Жыл бұрын

Yeah, the classics of genre, me likes!)

@quinnhasse9170 10 ай бұрын

Pov: humans marches as one, you should go home ( out if the way).

@stevendemunck7507 Жыл бұрын

For the algoritme!

@Jdne199311 9 ай бұрын

The Humans fought to annihilate.

@julesmasseffectmusic 9 ай бұрын

Damn, we pulled out the flamethrowers, mustard gas and white phosphorus, you really annoyed us.

@kittenwithmittens6200 Жыл бұрын

for the algorithim!

@obake6290 3 ай бұрын

Good story. Though I was confused on who or what the Valiant was for like half the story. Went from thinking it was a spaceship at the start, to thinking it was a title, to going back and forth between thinking the speaker and listeners were members of the Valiant or the Valiant were a third party. Finally, the last thing I thought it was turned out to be correct. Maybe I'm just dumb lol

@cameltanker1286 11 ай бұрын

Long story short, don't poke the bear.

@SergioMollari Ай бұрын

But if you must poke the bear, poke him where he's itchy. He might take your poke as a friendly scratch and let you live.

@iamironkanute8750 7 ай бұрын

Sad, but so true!

@sethfischer7368 Жыл бұрын

There's a book human mercenaries in space some use mech others are hand to hand the aliens end up putting them against each other. Anyone know it

@genericuser984 Жыл бұрын

cool

@lanceknowlton1871 Жыл бұрын

Neat even

@Kualinar 4 ай бұрын

During that war, the humans captured a LOT of the Valiant's technology. We are pretty good at reverse engineering things... Now, give the humans another reason to stop fighting among themselves and look at you as a threat, and, it'll be much, MUCH harder to even begin to attempt resisting. You may never get a chance to surrender.

@filipeprados4203 11 ай бұрын

Bravooo

@Maeshalanadae Жыл бұрын

Yeah, xenos. Only WE get to kick our asses!

@tehnosan5769 13 күн бұрын

So they made humanity put aside their differences turned the Geneva convention into the Geneva checklist? Smart move, I guess they never looked at our history

@craftysmithkeith3653 9 ай бұрын

me against my brother, my brother and I against our cousins, us against the world and more like children of terror

@johncunningham4820 8 ай бұрын

Mmmmm . Humanity as a WHOLE , going all Scottish on some poor " Coont " . 🤣 . Ireland understands too....................

@Iluvantir 11 ай бұрын

Me against my brother. My brother and I against our cousin. My brother, cousin and I against a neighbour. Our Town against another. Our Nation against another. Our world against another. Don't give us reason to do any of this, and we'll happily stay brother vs brother. Just leave us alone to pass our time our way. Or we'll give you the tuning of your life.

@treyriver5676 Жыл бұрын

We are at our best when we move together and we are at our worst when we move together. Delin Also.. a pacifist ( sort of) nation of commerce is attacked 4 solar rotations later 2 transuranic devices end the war. Earth calendar December 7 1942 to September 2 1945 anno domini.

@jayglier Жыл бұрын

Off by a year, its December 7 1941

@merlinathrawes746 8 ай бұрын

Do not give the Terrans a common enemy. Truer words have yet to be spoken. Just ask Hitler about that.

@verilyheld Ай бұрын

The Valiant killed kittens and puppies. There was no need to do that, they could have just let the human children keep their kittens and puppies. The Valiant . . . didn't. They killed kittens, puppies, they made human children cry. The Valiant are lucky humans retained enough humanity to let some of them live!