Read an analogy from a female author one time and she said - having kids and work is like juggling, and some balls are glass and some are plastic. You have to know which you can drop (the plastic ones) from time to time and which are the glass ones. the point was not that the "kids/family" ones are all glass - actually some of those are plastic. There are some glass balls in the work category and some in the kids/family category, and what you have to figure out is which ones you can drop every now and then to keep from dropping a glass one. And then making peace with the fact that it's a balancing/juggling act, and that some plastic balls are doing to be dropped sometimes, and that's ok.

Hi everyone, I'm making this video a fundraiser to help Ukrainian families that are getting displaced by the Russian invasion - those are probably the people feeling most overwhelmed of all right now. Consider supporting if you found what I said here useful. KZfaq says 100% of the money goes to the nonprofit (IRC). I did the first 10% and will definitely be doing more. Warmly, Nathaniel

Sweater shirt combo goes hard. Appreciated the message and as well, amazing to deliver it in one fluid take, well done, and thank you Nathaniel

I literally have so many notes on my iPhone that say “read this when you’re feeling overwhelmed” because, as a HSP, I’m constantly feeling overwhelmed. Thank you so much for this, Nathan. I really appreciate it! Sending love ❤️

Trying to also enjoy the season and burners that you are on right now. Not always wishing the neglected burner is different. I think accepting this is important.

I’m Naz! 🇺🇦 the one you spoke with about 3 weeks ago! I want to thank you for doing it for my country Ukraine 🇺🇦 People, please speak out about the situation and pray for Ukraine 🙏🏼🇺🇦

I love how you kept in the short clip of your interaction with your friend at the end. It keeps it real and makes me remember how you actually stand in front of the camera and tell your stories and share your knowledge with the world 😊📹

Just want to say at this point in my life, ive been hitting rock bottom constantly. And I dont know if its bad luck playing the roll, being at the wrong place wrong time kinda of scenario, or just flat out one of those people on this planet that just constantly gets served the s*** end of the stick if you will. What ever it may be, it is definetly screwing with me to the extent that I genuiely feel like im permanently confused, depressed, very overwhelmed, and lost in life. They say its supposed to be ups and downs in life, but the downs happen noticably so much more often than the good, even if I do try my best to keep positive energy. It always goes back to that same frequency of negative energy.

I’ve found that once I finally had one aspect of my life in order, another aspect would fall apart haha. It really is a balancing act, like you say. But it’s important not to let all of it topple because one aspect is behind. The four burners theory seems very apt.

Love the sentiment of this, and the awareness you'll bring to a lot of people. I want to share an even deeper paradigm shift with you: The reason the "4 Burner Theory" is impossible is because it's based on the fundamentally flawed belief that we have to do it all to have it all. This belief causes us to seek fulfillment outside of ourselves as opposed to being inwardly oriented and self-generating things like self-worth, self-confidence, and self-esteem. Which leads me to another fundamental flaw in this framework: there's no space for self/spirituality. To be clear, my definition of spirituality is one's own journey of understanding of the relationship between self and the Universe (everything that is not self). This missing component is essential to self-generation of happiness because with the journey of understanding one's own personal spirituality, one becomes self-referencing and becomes less inclined to seek fulfillment from the outside world and becomes less inclined to reference the journeys and successes of others in a comparative way. What this could look like within the context of this frame work could be to have all the burners on low. Because the truth is, there is no need to rush to success. Life happens in the present moment and here, now, is the only time that one can experience success, joy, happiness and fulfillment. Instead of believing that any of these "burners" need to be sacrificed to keep another on "full blast," what if we look at the possibility of "slow cooking" our meal? Instead of holding the belief that we have to overexert in each of these areas, what if we held a belief that what we are doing is enough? Food for thought =)

This is soooo important!! I love the concept of the burners. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed because I try to do too many things at the same time. Fortunately, I'm in a period of my life where I decided to cut things that weren't that important and focus on the things that matter the most to me. Sometimes less is really more.

Couldn't help but noticed you are in Salzburg. A lovely, magical place.

The hug at the end left me with a smile. I really needed that right now.

Compromising and making sacrifices are being made every day. When you journal you only realise how much you do these things. We mustn't be too hard on ourselves. By getting aware of what we do we can have more peace for ourselves. The seasons of life is something we resonate with. Thank you for sharing these words, they are true and helpful.

The timing of this video is impeccable. 😅💕

I’m 62 years old and I have only one burner. I run it at 40%, and life is beautiful!

It's so sad how incredibly fast time goes by, can't keep up with friends and family, rushing to get to work, trying keeping a healthy diet, taking care of yourself and have very little time to enjoy things.

100% Agree with this ✨ In times like this is really important to learn how to deal with overwhelming emotions ✨🙏💕 Be brave and embrace this season of your life. Nothing last forever ✨

I so needed this video today. Recently I've been feeling very overwhelmed and hearing you talk about it and explain things made me feel so much better. It is a normal feeling that isn't being normalised at all nowadays. You're expected to have it all always. Thank you for your content.

thank you so much for using your platform to help those in need in these difficult times 🌱

Thank you for this! Just on time

Nathan I'm commenting this before watching the video, but just seeing your motivated face puts me in some sort of peace. Your channel saved my life .

but i don’t want to give up love. i need to be loved i want to feel loved i want to have someone to turn to at the end of the day. i don’t want to accept that there will never be love in my life and move on. i feel so sad and hopeless. i just need to be loved. i haven’t got any strong family ties, my school achievements are always either average or below average. i do have many friends but they can’t always be there for you and there’s only so much they can contribute. i feel so lost. i have no hopes or dreams anymore. i gave up.

I absolutely agree with your concept and especially the seasons of life. For myself I often don't realize beforehand in which areas I'm currently spending my time bur only when looking back an reflecting on it, I realized where I spent/invested the time. I think that's something I should start to focus on, to make a deliberate descision where to invest my time before I do it, so I can appreciate the moments as they happen and not so much in retrospect.

Now I realise why I sometimes have an amazing work / career period, while my relationships go down the drain. That is because of this theory (we have 4 buckets: family, health, work and friends and only 3 of them can go at full blast at a time and not for a long time. Ideally, only 2 will go full blast at one time). And this is normal - our energy is limited. So eventually, we get overwhelmed. Thank you for this video, Nathan!

For the past few months “balance” has been a big concept for me, trying to find balance between extreme states and with this video I grasp better onto the idea that there is no strive for balance, just making the best out of what is already, “enjoy”. “Wherever you are, be there fully.”

Thank you for sharing this video Nathaniel!

I really needed this.Thankyou 😊

Watching it after your first apartment video on the main channel and it somehow slipped into my "hands" exactly at the right time. Thank you Nathaniel 🙏🏻

I needed this so much rn. Thank you very much Nathaniel!

Yeah it's soo true. I've noticed that for myself too. I would also include fun/passion as a fifth 🙏🏽🕉️❤️

Thank you so much, Nathaniel! I have been watching you for years now and really consider you one of the most inspiring and admirable people to look up to. I was just thinking the other day, how incredible it would be to see people like you speak up and support our people. Thank you for doing this! With love and appreciation, from Ukraine 💙💛

Damn, I wish I had a single one on. Two would be incredible. Three would be a perfect life.

Two of your burners are really quite similar: Family and Friends, both relate to love and relationships. These could be put together and open up a fourth burner (or quadrant as the Stanford Design Your Life program uses) for 'Play' or curiousity, creativity and fun. I think the four areas: Health, Love, Play and Work are a more balanced view of life.

I needed this right now, thanks man!

I really needed to hear this, thank you!

Such a calming video. Love it.

totally overwhelmed, can't get it all done with work, and money is tight due to economy, wife has been pretty sick for over 3 years, daughter has emotional disorders, and i am feeling like a failed dad, and have a bad relationship with my own folks, who choose my sibling over me all the time. all i can do is focus on the next thing i have to do, that's it.

I LOVEEEEE the kind of topics that you mention on your channel! I wish I can find freinds like you who love to talk about such topics! I am always reflecting on such stuff! its funny I came to this realization on my own the other day, so I looked it up today and found your video!

Thank you for sharing. Really needed to hear this.

Watching this in my Amor Fati sweater, thinking about how you always post videos like this when I really need it

Thank you for this Nathan your videos are so valuable to me.

What a gift for us to hear those kind and amazing words! Thanks Nathaniel! You're so young and so wise! Please when you be here in Brazil one day, gimme this wonderful oportunaty to talk with you :) You´re inspire me so much! Not only with languages, which is something that i really admire in you and look forward to be suceed on it too, but also as human been conecting us with so beautiful words, images and nice talks and bringing so many learning with your experiences. I only have to say: Thank you so much! Beijos de uma brasileira que é muito sua fã!

I totally agree with this. At some point before too long, I will retire. I intend to live abroad again, but at the same time, I am someone who always strives to do a good job and engage in my academic pursuits. It helps to put things in perspective! Great video!

I needed this.Thank you

Needed words, thank you for sharing.

Love this point of view.I never thought about it like that and If I really think about it, I never fully enjoyed my results because there was one aspect of my life that was not going well/or as I want it to work.

Incredible video!!

Thanks for the reminder. I agree with the idea that our lives are lived in seasons. I’m someone that requires a lot of certainty and structure - and that used to make me feel overwhelmed, like I wasn’t doing enough. Only recently i have begun to learn to listen to my body/mind, because often they give me signals that a certain burner is becoming more significant in my life, while others are taking a break. I find that the answers are closer than we think and sometimes we just have to let them illuminate themselves and not try too hard to force things.

Thank you. A rather simple message, but it is so much more practical (and closer to real life) than many ideas out there.

Love this video!

This helped Nathan! Thank you 🌻

Thank you!

This is absolutely beautiful ❤️

to be stable whatever takes but how to be stable to do everything normal according to the situation and build a good mindset during years. not to push yourself suddenly.

Agreed 100%, I really like the analogy of the burners. Much love.

Super underrated great job a hundred thumbs up fr Too underrated

Mozart agrees with the seasons of life

I've heard variations of this, some at 5, some more. What's great about this vid is "no more than three" and the seasons of things.

I can relate to it. I m in a situation like this and the video is helpful to me. U mentioned to tell other techniques to cope with overwhelm... So when i feel like this, i think about good things that hve happened or are in my life. This way , its kinda helfpul to avoid the overwhelming feeling and accept the life is unperfect and still it can be joyful+balanced.

This is so helpful ✨ thank u

Thanks. I love the four burners idea. As one who loves to cook, I know that often things cook much better on a slow simmer. The idea that we have to excel at top speed through everything is such false goal. To paraphrase John Muir: we want to saunter, not hike.

Thank you for sharing Nathaniel, so important 🙌🏼 PS: On a totally unrelated note - you may be the first KZfaq creator that I follow and see visiting my home town. I hope you had a great time there! 🙏🏼

Thank you I loved this video and the message. Needed this right now. I appreciate you

So true, and for me these seasons change constantly, just to keep the cycle going

Thank you

This is a nice idea and helps me to feel less guilty and stressed that I'm not "doing it all". I think I can barely do 2 lol. So this is a good reminder to be balanced with myself and others, too.

Thank you, Nathan.

I like the four burner idea a lot. And looking at life in seasons. Thanks for sharing Nathan. Not sure I would’ve learnt this otherwise.

love this idea of life and its absolutely true I believe. Concentrating on an important work chance you might get just once in life doesn't mean you don't care about your family/friends. But if you fulfill your wishes trough work (and other stuff) you will be (hopefully) later on more happy and you can bring this energy back to your closest people :) have a great weekend all of you

Excellent concept. Raw and genuine. Thank you! p.s. I totally agree with the theory you put forward!

In my experience, everything in life comes down to balance. So yeah, I totally agree with your theory of seasons. I believe a way to do this the most optimally is by being able to set your priorities straight for that season of your life, together with being able to focus on the things you've decided to focus on at that moment. It's okay to 'lose sight' of the other components for a while. You can always decide when it's time for a new season, new priorities, and new things to focus on.

Nathaniel, God bless your kindest soul! I’ve been enjoying your work for a long time and realising your greatest awareness makes me admire you even more ! Your support means the whole world to me as a Ukrainian! Thank you! 🙏

Thank you 🙏🏻

That was a fire vid man and it came in at the perfect time hope all is well

Loved it!

Thanks for sharing this thought :)

Wow this was really helpful. Thanks for sharing your insights. I was wondering this week if it's possible to excel at everything at once in life and it seemed like almost impossible. So I made peace with the fact that to focus on growing my business as an online mindset coach - digital nomad, I had to temporarily neglect other areas of my life. Knowing that it's temporary helps :)

First time I heard about this theory. Thanks for sharing this. This will be helpful for me.

For seven months, I have been hustling hard to build my writer platform over at Substack and Medium. As Feb was coming to an end, I realised that, even though everything was working fine and I was seeing growth in work, I needed a break. I needed a break to recharge my batteries, to organise my thoughts and come back stronger. So that is what I am doing. I am taking the whole month of March a break. I need to fill my cup before I can serve others.

Really liked the way you put everything awesome. 👍

I was in anger for the last 6 hours because some people treated me wrongly and unfair. And just now, as I was watching this video I thought: Actually, don't bother about these people. Thank you for that!

Thanks for the positivity

Great video, great guys 💕

Thanks

I and all Ukrainians are very grateful for your support 💙💛 Bloggers never should turn blind eye to people who are in trouble. We all appreciate you for being conscious about it. Just want to thank you (I've been watching your videos for a year and never posted a comment. I think it was the right time to write one)

Thank you. This helps, to let go of that perfectionism I have tried to keep up in every single area of my life. It just came weirdly at the right time, where I feel extremely stuck by balancing all of these areas. It makes me realize, that whatever I do it might just not be possible to serve everything and everyone. Feels like you can’t improve one of areas or get really anywhere when you try to serve all of the four equally. Somehow I am feeling always guilty neglecting one a little. It just made me realize, how huge of an existential time problem (if you can call it that way) this is. I always thought of it rather as my time management-Problem:D Wanna get to know more about that theory💪🏼

I'm extremely overwhelmed since I don't have a clue on what I wanna do in my life. I'm confused and I developed a dermatisis for this reason. I'm ambitious and I dream to work and be successful, but I'm a mess when I need to figure out myself

I absolutely agree that we all should think of it as seasons as you say.. I left my family, friends, country.. To focus on myself on my health my work life.. The friends came along and now to be honest i know that i will cherish the moments with my family much more.. Even the calls, anything. Im grateful for every moment

Damn! I am so glad. Someone like you are thinking the same thing as myself. Thinking as: Life is a cycle, the next season will come. You just need to be patient with this cycle/season and you'll change or make those other burners work together to be balanced. DAMN.

Thank u for that

Thank you for doing this! 💙💛

This is so helpful as a University student!

Thanks for Sharing 😍😊 and so happy to see you in my city 😍😍 enjoy it!!!

Saving this video. I wish someone had told me this in highschool.

thanks a lot.... was getting overwhelmed

Wise young man. Great presentation if not his own unique material. I'm by objective measures highly successful at 54 in terms of family and career, and I have to keep reminding myself of these truths every single morning as I steel myself for a new day. Thing is, there's a lot of reward and fulfillment in that daily struggle which is why we do it. Just know where the line is for you, and do not cross it. Prioritize what is most important to you.

Dear Nathaniel, I've only now, after watching your main channel for several years, found this one. I am old enough to be your mother (or perhaps at almost 60, your grandmother lol). I have several KZfaqrs your age-ish that I follow. I find you in particular to be insightful. I really appreciate your zest for life, the chances you take, the things you try, and how you are unabashedly you. I am a serial procrastinator and due to some stuff in my childhood, a perfectionist. I've always said that I don't do anything that I don't think I'm going to be really good at. I hate failure. I mean, where did that even come from? Terribly unhealthy. So I appreciate your channels and I am encouraged to try new things. Because, after all, I'm almost 60. What do I have to lose? Thanks for all you do. Love and hugs. Lisa

If you're cooking in a wok, you want the burner on full blast. But stews that are cooked low and slow are also delicious.

I have found that the secret to a good life is how well you process your emotions. If you feel any perceived negative feeling, whether it's overwhelm, stress, frustration, fear, anger, hopelessness, etc. You stop and voice how you feel and ask questions around it. Why do I feel this way? Where did it come from? What can I control? What do I need to accept? What do I need to let go of? Where did I learn to respond this way? How can I respond differently? What thought triggered my emotion? Is this thought true? What or who do I need to forgive? You get the idea. Practicing this process has been instrumental in feeling peaceful as a whole throughout my day. Also scheduled time for each thing you want to do and improve has been a good tool for me. Just doing things when I'm able. No need to stress about how much I'm giving to which area of my life.