There's no such thing as all the time quiet bpd. If you NEVER acted out in any way shape or form therefore you are not a bpd and you are misdiagnosed maybe you are a victim of cptsd. All borderlines go through times of being shy and quiet and aggressive, externalizing and acting out other times no matter how rare those events are. Says prof. sam vaknin not me

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This is kind of creepy to me because so many of the things you are talking about are relatively normal human experiences. Fear of intimacy and being seen. Shame. Self blame for the toxic behavior of others. Wearing a mask to make people feel comfortable or to feel accepted. Low self esteem. When does it become pathological? My therapist is trying to tell me I have some symptoms of BPD. But I don't have rage, anger, or mood swings. I can relate to other things like a strong fawn response. I don't know. I just wonder about all this and when and if it's appropriate to decide you have a personality disorder vs CPTSD

I love him

As someone with actual NPD, I find this information quite misleading and stigmatising of the condition for the general public.

It comes out with coworkers, AND friends AND romantic relationships for me…even a therapist

I match this all. I'm crying cause I feel so good at finding this out. I don't know how I should talk about it to a therapist tho

So helpful lol

11:37 venn diagram

I just turned 40 and recently got my PBD diagnosis, I have been fighting the urge to kill myself since I was a teen. I have an amazing wife and 3 kids. Ive felt like they are plotting to throw me away and replace me, off and on for years. Since my diagnosis, my wife has started to make me feel more stable and secure about the future. Its been a big help, its still about as hard to fight, BUT the fighting is less painful now. I have hope for the future, and I use that to combat the fear, when i can.

You most certainly are appreciated for the space you consume. I don’t know you however I stopped to listened to for 15 minutes, twice and learned some valuable insights from you. Well done and thank you for existing

My god i felt the pain behind these words because i live exactly the same life, please know you're not alone! I get it, i get it all, you made a great representation of everything i've felt my entire life

Quetiapina y Divalproato de sodio me sirvieron para estabilizarme. Ahora la sanación está dentro de mí. Hay que sanar el alma.

Hillary Clinton has BPD and she is also a covert narcissist.

Nicely explained. Thanks

One thing I learn that is not often stated : the perfection you seek makes you more sensitive to your unperfections and your partners unperfections. There’s a lot about being gentle with oneself

Nothing has worked but I’ve just started Lamictal. Begging for relief after what I’ve been through for the last almost 2 years of my life.

My psychiatrist got my meds combo right 14yrs ago and im now able to live a "normal" life,i have BPD and clinical depression,anxiety and OCD,ive done talking therapies aswell but i take 45mg mirtazipine,40mg citalopram and 100mg slow release quetiapine.comes with downside tho,all are metabolised thru liver so im now on statins,got to have yearly blood test and heart trace cos its not a combination they usually prescribe and can affect my heart,but its a risk im willing to take to live happily.

how do you stop procrastinating when the second you try to get things done you snap at a loved one such that you’re on the verge of assaulting them 😵

I always ghost people and cut them off bc i find relationship with people exhausting. I don't see myself getting close to people. I just want to be alone. Is this BPD? I just can't help it

I’ve never felt so seen by what you’re saying. Thank you for this.

rushing into relationships trying to please the other person and sabotaging it, distorted unstable sense of self, self harming dangerous behaviour and loss of identity anyone who has BPD you are a warrior for still being here

dbt is great for alot of mental disorders. Prized for saving many bpd peoples lives, it saves other sufferers with different disorders lives as well.

This hell started a bit over two .months ago and it's had some of the most heartwrenching moments I've ever experienced. To see screenshots of this incredibly special person to you who only days or weeks ago would spend every minute of every day talking to you and brightening each others' days now saying horrible things about you and making other people think you're some monster and talking to him you hear nothing but denial of anything being wrong while he won't even tell you anything about this huge event he's been looking forward to for a year and you're sidelined. If that had only been the worst part. It just keeps getting more and more hellish. I promised to myself I'd never use his abandonment issues to manipulate his behavior at all so I've tried to be as steady and unconditional as I possibly can but it's backfired. He still tests me with a myriad of things to see it he gets me to walk but at baseline he's a block of ice and he's gone as far as not even calling me by my name anymore, I used to miss him calling me by his nickname for me but now I apparently don't even deserve to be called by my name most of the time.

I started taking Lamictal around 4 years ago, and it helped so much. Now its not quite enough, at 300mg. My dr added Abilify and the last week has been better. Also take an anti anxiety

I really really don’t feel boredom is related to emptiness because how can we constantly keep being busy !?!

Thank you so much for this video! 💙💙💙 I really need it. I hope you feeling much less alone in the present! 🌷 (considering this video was made 2 years ago)

I personally think this is a good video. You need to see the motivations behind the symptoms. My trigger is inflexibility and resistance to change (although I know changes are necessary for personal inner growth), and I react with massive tantrums or experience long-term burnout. My incompetent psychiatrist thought I had BPD (she wasn’t even 100% sure if I had BPD because I didn’t meet many criteria - especially fear of abandonment. In fact, I like when people leave me alone so I don’t have to feel overwhelmed during social communications) just on the basis of ‘emotional dysregulation.’

Having quiet BPD suuuucked, to severely understate it. Please hang in there, never give up, train your mind, and remember you are not your thoughts, feelings, or actions-you just experience them and are responsible for them, but they can never be you

Watching this video has seriously done more then words can describe. I was diagnosed with bpd at 25. Everyday living is agony and I just want to say your youtube channel has me in tears knowing im not the only one who feels this hollow inside. Just thank you.

I used to believe I was an empath but now I’m not so sure… I don’t feel what others feel I do strongly react to the vibes they send. Does that make sense?

Thank you so much for this video. I know it's been 2 years you posted it but I got diagnosed a couple months ago with quiet BPD and I feel so seen <3 Seriously, thank you for sharing your experience and I hope things have been good for you ever since.

The thing is, I’m suspecting both, and impulsivity is one of the weaker symptoms… great.

You said it was hard to summarize, what its like in just a few minutes.. but your video basically just summed me up 100% I recently entered my first relationship in over 6 years, and it has definitely been a challenge for me. Thank you so much for this video

I understand how this stands out I have ptsd and anxiety and bpd

I love your video-my girlfriends in Hawaii on vacation for two weeks and she’s cut off contact with me and wants me to respect that. She’s there with her kids and her dad and I couldn’t handle that. I bugged her so much to give me the attention I was craving that she got to the point where she’s blocked me and won’t talk to me till she gets home. I have BPD and I just discovered this while she’s been on this trip. I’ve been watching videos on KZfaq that explain every feeling that I’ve ever had. This video is my new happy place because I’ve been looking for one searching for it. I couldn’t find it.

I have no diagnoses; however, this felt like a direct callout. I mean this when I say it. This is my entire life in a small synopsis, and I hate it deeply to the point that I'd kill to be anyone different. I did not have particularly the best childhood, but it by no means drove me to the point where I felt as though I was inherently "flawed" because the abuse wasn't (for the most part, at least) psychological, yet I still want to be the scapegoat, and actively crave attention to the point where I believe I am completely without use if people don't love me. Even though I (homeschooled) got perfect grades and finished almost every high school class by the age of 14, I perceived myself to be a complete idiot. I have this innate programming inside this silly little head of mine that I am incapable of being loved, and though I have mostly made peace with this, I still find it disheartening at times. I don't know what is wrong with me, and I quite frankly don't want to find out. I do not believe a diagnosis or label would make me this new, euphoric version of myself. Thanks for reading, and I pray you all succeed in life :)

Thank you very much Ms. Means a lot to have your honest insight and wisdom to turn to. Peace and love to you always. 1☆¤♡

I love you

this just sounds like depression and insecurity. i don't see the difference

I am so impressed with your wisdom and know well that it comes from hard work. Thanks.

I just want to say that your self disclosure is so good. I understand that the emotion suppression makes it hard for others to understand or even believe the excruciating pain of BPD. You telling some of the struggles, especially when you get very specific, will help people with quiet BPD and those trying to understand it. Having perfectionism and a trained discounting of emotional needs and weaknesses means that this level of sharing pain is no easy. I know. It is funny, because people with BPD can be hypervigilant about facial expressions. And yet some with quiet BPD hide a large amount of emotions, most especially negative ones. In watching you, as you already know, people don't see the pain that you are explaining. The more detailed that you are with how you struggle, it makes more sense for those trying to understand their own journey or those who love them. Never doubt that you are enough if you never shared, but also that what you have shared has been very helpful to others. I appreciate the work you put into this.

I also relate to both.. i think i have both..

*The only way to date someone with BPD is by not dating them at all* Plain and simple. This is the advice every person who dated someone with BPD gives. There is a reason why BPD is in the same cluster (B) as NPD. Save yourselves the heartache and many years of recovery and do not get involved with someone you know or suspect has BPD.

How do you establish boundaries with someone who has BPD? I refuse to interact with cluster b's as they can be so damaging. I come from a dysfunctional family dynamic that relies on a scapegoat in order to deflect from the real issues at hand. I grew up facing extremely traumatic abuse from an NPD father and a BPD stepmother both of which I've had to set firm boundaries with but to avail. They tend to fall into the behavior of projective identification which is infuriating and leaves me feeling helpless. They don't have the right to re-traumatize me as an adult.

Thank you!❤. You summarized very well my feelings and experience as well. Like you my quiet BPD really is only seen in my romantic relationships. I am in my 50s and been through many marriages with alot of regret but never understood why I was the way I was. I find I am getting better the older I get vs how bad it was in my 20s and 30s. And now getting the help I need professionally to finally get a handle on this. Your story really touched me- thank you for sharing.

Accepting my disability means never getting another job, and moving back in with my parents, and being a drain on them in their old age. Masking my disability keeps my bills paid, no matter how much I suffer at work. Nonaccsptance keeps me independent and alive.

I dissociate a lot, mostly derealisation - i didn't even know that was what it is until recently, I honestly thought everyone felt like this. I do it badly when it's busy at work - everything feels fuzzy and zoomed in and 'floaty' idk how to explain it.

Omg I'm like 99 % sure I'm b.p.d w hypersexual , from my child hood sexual abuse

This just happened to me? I start talking to this beautiful man from my city and the moment I ask him about his relationship with God he dismisses me and QUICKLY blocks me on everything? Wtf… his bio said “BPD” though so I started looking into it… I’m glad we didn’t talk too long because this would’ve triggered me so much!!