"Being very entitled and controlling; Narcissists have no difficulties stepping over your personal boundaries" - This is burnt into my brain.

One of the most evil tactics an abuser can employ is not mere sabotage and betrayal. It is to betray and sabotage, then use your natural reaction as an excuse to treat you as a Crazy Person. Anon

They will eventually stop compliments and start devaluing you, gaslighting, and name-calling. They will never be the ones to end a relationship because they always want to be the "good guy" and pull the victim card.

Coverts that I’ve encountered do the following: will purposely be late, will never follow through on a commitment, will not involve themselves in large crowds, total know it alls, always fishing for compliments, very-very fake, no attachment to family, secretive, only sweet to you when they want something, very jealous & envious of others .

Spent so much time with my narcissistic ex-spouse, I almost forgot what it was like to be treated with respect & like I matter.

They will do things to make you feel insecure and then they will tell you that you are insecure

I don't think there is a more friendly person than my husband towards strangers, but there is a different story towards us his family.

These people can be so incredibly dangerous. For God's sake protect your pets. They target what you love.

A narcissist is only committed to their lies , stealing and arrogance .

They lie constantly, and when they have spoken about you behind your back, and when caught out, they outright deny it! Lying and lying constantly. I absolutely hate people lying to me on a constant basis.

The sneakiness that goes on behind your back is never-ending and highly malignant.

"overtime people will reveal themselves, wait, and be patient". The amount of hurt and devastation that happened to me has been something I have never come back from. I still live and have a life but it will never be the same.

They are living their karma 24/7. We know it and they know it. Gets worse for them as they age. They have betrayed themselves.

There used to be a writer on Quora, Veronica Welles, who wrote wonderful, insightful pieces on narcissism. After I commented here, I remembered that she once said (in her opinion) that the defining characteristic of a covert narcissist was “switching off.” I just thought about this and how right she was. Every covert I’ve ever known does this. Let’s say you’re talking, you’ll pour your heart out about something and they’ll look at you, dead silence or give you a one-word response. I have two covert narcissist brothers, and the one you can actually talk to without getting raged at will just switch topics, like hard 90-degree conversation right angles the minute you bring something up that he can’t instantly establish himself as the authorized expert on. These folks are truly maddening pieces of work.

These creatures live for hijacking your emotions … expect nothing from a narc and you’ll never be disappointed 😵‍💫

They are envious. They triangulate. They are critical. They don’t celebrate you. They will buy you but not apologize. They dismiss you but expect you to show up for them at the drop of a hat. They are jealous unfortunately… When you see the mask fall off - they will put on a mask and do damage control. It is sad. Not loyal friend. But demand loyalty.

His problems are our problems, my problems are strictly mine. Narcissistic loyalty

Essentially the passive aggressive covert narcissists just treat you with contempt. Catch their expression when they look at you. You are just so far beneath them.

Sabotage is the act of destroying or undermining something. It can take two forms - active or passive. Active refers to doing something that causes harm and passive is failing to do something which by its omission causes harm. Covert narcissists sabotage in sneaky ways to gain supply and it can take many years before you become fully aware of their deepseated hatred. In my experience, they prefer passive sabotage because it is less obvious and allows them to maintain their façade of normality. Silence is popular amongst your covert variety, as is withholding affection. Triangulating also works quite well to confuse the victim. It is the gradual removal of human connection that leaves the victim wondering where it all went so horribly wrong.

Betrayal belongs to pretenders

My brain almost exploded. My narc inlaws were asking what was my daughter watching on tv. We told them and all they said was "oh". Absolutely no follow up questions. They aren't even interested in their own grandkids. Also me and my husband did some cosmetic renos on the house. They absolutely paid it no affention. When you said they withhold compliments they absolutely do. They are so energy depleting.

My ex kept saying how others betrayed him, and I was wondering why he was doing the same to me, and as well, accusing me of betraying him when I continuously supported him in any ways possible. I realize deceit and betrayal is the language of their world, which I don't belong.

I spent 23 years in a relationship with a covert narcissist. The problem is, I had no idea what a covert narcissist was until after the breakup. I was too busy to notice the passive-aggressive behavior, busy with work, a child, and family responsibilities. I was also way too trusting. We started arguing a lot over nothing, so I made a decision not to argue about anything. You'd think that would improve a relationship. Instead, he left because it broke the push-pull cycle and he was no longer getting supply.

They absolutely will not receive input.

Dr. Carter you are making the world a better place. Great respect to you for all that you do.. Thanks.

MICRO BETRAYALS AND PASSIVE AGRESSIVE ANGER

That’s infuriating that their so thirsty for praise & compliments and don’t acknowledge anything you do . .. only see what you don’t do 😵‍💫

This is absolutely spot on. I was duped for a total of seven years. Seven years of my life thinking that maybe something would change. I knew something was wrong all along, but chose to ignore it. The lying by omission, and the not wanting to talk about Problems or our relationship should have been my red flag to get out. For those experiencing this don’t waste years like I did.

Narcissists are experts at betrayal because they learned it in their childhood. The use of betrayal as a tool to threaten and coerce is all they know. There is little else more disturbing than an adult whose personality is still that of a child. Hence, there is the private child side of the narcissist and the adult-pleasing public side.

Check all those boxes. HERE'S ANOTHER ONE: He quietly sabotaged/broke personal things of mine & things around the house: Broke the only car key to my classic car in half and "lost" the broken off part. It ended up costing me over $600. as I had to order a new ignition cylinder and have it installed. He also refused to put plumbing glue on a repair he insisted doing and the pipe slowly leaked under the cabinet. By the time I discovered it the cabinet was permanently damaged. I could go on...and on...I thought they were just honest mistakes but looking back - WOW.😮

Some of the best advise that I have ever heard regarding relationships was offered at min 12:02 of this video. I was married for 33 years and spent 4 1/5 years involved in a divorce. It all happened so quickly in the beginning, we were engaged and married within months of our first date. I was so young and did not really know the person that I ended up married to for over half of my life. If I had taken the time to truly get to know him, much of what has caused me so much grief and despair could have possibly been avoided. It is no coincidence that they move in quickly in the beginning sweeping you off your feet. Time tells all and they know that they must make their move before their true self is revealed. Lies by omission was a favorite tactic of my husband. I am still discovering, almost 40 years later, things that he kept undercover. He was hiding so much. It makes me so so very sad.

Wow, 53 years of vacations by his choice, meals to his liking, cars always chosen by him, temperature in the house his choice, rules on what the savings in the bank is for, carports only for my boat and lawnmower and you can put your wheelbarrow here, on and on it goes. I now take CBD oil and lavender oil to calm my nerves because controlling words are as abusive as physical contact!!

Before I kicked her to the curb, my narc "friend" loved to jerk me around with her drama ploys. She would hint at something being horribly wrong with her (a terminal illness) but when I tried to offer her comfort, she wouldn't even give me the full story. She enjoyed watching me dangle in the wind. I discarded her 2 months ago. No telling what lies she's been spreading about me. Who cares.

My aunt nearly constantly complains to me about other people. Several people told me that she complained about me (behind my back) to them. When I told my aunt about that, she immediately proclaimed them liars, even though she has been caught lying many times herself. Crazy stuff.

Dr. C and Team Healthy, I hope you are all doing well. I think the saddest reality is that the betrayal began from day one, and it took many of us years, and in my case, decades, to realize it. Betrayal in every aspect actually. I woke up to the psychological and emotional abuse first, and decided to end the marriage. All I've come across since is the realization that there was not only that type of abuse, but physical betrayals, professional betrayals, family betrayals, etc. It's shocking what happens when the "scales" fall away and you can see it all for what it is. The Lord was waiting for me to come back to Him, and He put people like Dr. C and Team Healthy in my life, to help me through the rest of my journey. Thank you and God Bless You. ❤

A narcissist will suddenly gaslight with questions that are out of context. A question that makes no logical sense which is insulting to some degree. That is an intended subversive game of manipulative control.

This actually reminds me of very early playground days at primary school or earlier. Like, "You're my bestest friend EVER!" Then another playmate."Do you know what she's just said about you?" 🙄

Dismissiveness. That describes my sister so accurately. Micro betrayals. As well as macro betrayals.

1. They will make fun of you in front of people you love and admire or respect and appreciate or all the above and somehow successfully convince those people they (the narcissist) was “just joking.” 2. They will talk about you behind your back and if ever found out, they will play the “I didn’t mean it that way” card so that whomever they were talking to about you completely believes them that “they didn’t mean it that way.” 3. They will convince you that you that your crazy for remembering exact details of a particular matter so that they can weasel their way out of having to take responsibility for whatever the matter happened to be. 4. They will ignore you completely and then ten minutes later play the “I didn’t hear you” game (even tho they were standing right next to you and there was no way whatever it was to be heard could not be heard.) 5. They will promise this and that and never follow through- most likely because you (they will claim) somehow kept them from keeping their promises. 6. They will open doors for you just to literally walk right in front of you as you attempt to walk through the open door they’re holding while previously motioning you through and then act like you somehow got in their way AND THEN act like they don’t understand why you didn’t walk through the door they were holding for you. 7. They will point at something that is just beyond your vision while “bumping” you in the face just so they can say “it was an accident.” 8. They will fall asleep while driving and when you wake them up and insist on driving for them, they will act SO hurt and offended and they will refuse to pull over so that ten miles down the road you will have to wake them up while falling asleep at the wheel again. 9. They will have SO MANY “good reasons” for the disrespectful and inappropriate things they do both to you as well as do in general so that what they do still ends up effecting you, that you have no other option but to believe them (at first) and other people will think you are the most inconsiderate person for not believing said excuses that it makes talking about you behind your back so easy it just becomes their go-to conversations. (And of course they will claim they NEVER talk about you.) 10. They will say they’re sorry “for everything” so that they never have to apologize for anything in particular and then treat you as tho you’re being ridiculous when you tell them you don’t accept their apology because it’s an incomplete apology. They will convince people outside looking in that they (the narcissist) have “apologized for everything” so that that phrase (“apologized for everything”) sounds perfectly acceptable and complete and the other people will think “how horrible of you” that you won’t get over something the narcissist clearly apologized for (but actually never once even remotely acknowledged because of the umbrella apologies of “I apologized for ‘everything.’”) I finally figured it out but wow the covert is so good at betrayal that it’s as tho they can’t help themselves… even THAT is 100% not true but somehow it’s also 100% how it seems. They are THAT good at what they do. Eventually if you don’t learn to embrace the cliche phrase of “fool me once…” you will always and forever be the narcissist’s fool. Be YOU. Even if you have to shed a few pounds (aka people) to be who YOU choose to be! It’s not easy. But goodness, is being with them any easier? No. The ultimate betrayal of the covert (whether it be the covert person OR group of persons) is they will convince you you should be who THEY SAY you should be. They will use your morals and your values and even your scruples against you so that you will think they have the same morals, values, and scruples as you. And when you are so sure you believe the same things, want the same things, care for the same things, they will lay down their mask of pretender in a way that convinces you you’re not who you thought YOU were and they act as tho they “don’t know where all of your objection to their behavior is coming from” so that you yourself will do anything (or just about anything) to convince them you are who you say you are but it won’t matter by then. By then you’re basically being exactly who they want you to be… a confused individual who is dead inside and easily manipulated. Wake up! Be YOU! Light and love, Team Healthy! DrC, my store grand opening was incredible! I didn’t think my tiny store could hold so many folks haha! I still have so much to learn but I’m having so much fun (sore feet and all) figuring it out without having to babysit narcissistic people along the way! I hope you had a great Labor Day!!!

Betrayal destroys trust ... And forgiving the narcissist in my life was easy, but the trust was completely gone -- plus, there was zero change coming from my mother-in-law. So to preserve my inner peace and mental health I chose to go no contact with her. Forgiveness & Trust are two separate issues.

He is now 72 years old. He's showing his age and losing his hair. He even tried to blame me for that.

So sick of these little minds Betraying Trust.

I cut off a 5 year situation last weekend with a Narc. He got caught on the phone by a hidden phone I set up so I could just bust him and not feel bad about leaving over things I “thought” was going on but had no real proof. Well I got my proof… never told him HOW I caught him though and he STILL lied. Then he turned around and KINDA told the truth but I heard it all. My chance had finally come to break away clearly without being the bad one. The next day he had a car accident (memorial day) and keep texting me acting like it was something serious…I broke because my car is in his name and my decals run out soon so I had to be “nice” because I had got my evidence so what could it hurt. So I finally called to act like I cared… in the middle of it all he asked if we where still done and you know my answer. He didn’t get upset so I thought I was good until he texted later asking if I take him to work since his car was totaled out in the accident. Now mind you he NEVER apologized for being caught on phone with a ex so I was respectful but said I’d rather not and asked if he could at least respect my feelings in the situation and that’s all I needed…did need a apology or anything. He Blocked me and claimed that he’d still send car decals in the mail. Mind you this man shot me in the leg a year ago. They will ruin your life and have you thinking you’re crazy. STAY AWAY AT ALL COST…JUST RUN.

“They’re already playing you, you just don’t know it…part of the betrayal aspect of the narcissist is they’re data gatherers”

When they congratulate your son for an accomplishment with their lips, but their face is in disgust and pain. Its a cut to the heart AND a blessing because now I understand what is going on. It finally “clicked”.

Thank you for explaining about being duped in the end. I fell for it again. They asked questions and I gave them data, thinking they cared.

This described my husband of 29 yrs. He’s absolutely a passive aggressive covert narcissist. It’s so hard to stay with him. We’ve had a very difficult 29 yrs. 😢

PERFECT TIMING of this one again for me as im working out what their latest game is. They're not remotely interested in WHO you are , what you're about, what you like, dislike. You become what THEY want and think you're choosing for yourself. You aren't, but you end up loosing who you are to fit their mould to get their attention, miniscule validations. It makes any relationship hollow and a feeling of not being seen and trying to always please them so they'll smile your way. You're tuning into them, they're not tuning into you. Conversations don't ever seem to bring clarity or true closeness on a deeper level

Someone that pretends. that is someone who you cannot figure out who they are. they change so often. I can't stand this kind of person having flaws makes us human. this person is trying to be someone they're not

My ex-friend narcissist once accidentally said outloud, "I'm so lonely." She sounded like a small child. I believe it is the only truth she has ever spoken.

This is really spot on and helpful. It took me YEARS to recognize the covert narcissist in my life after years of betrayal. I really believed they were a good person despite it all. Dr. C has some of the best videos on covert narcissism and has really helped me understand what happened to me. Please keep doing the good work. ❤

And don't want anything they say to be questioned, no matter how much of it made no sense.

Dang, my spouse had 10/10. I noticed these things creep in, but i put it off as people do that sometimes. Then sometimes turned to too many times for me to look at her differently. Its sad realizing this isn't the person they led you to believe they were.

Interesting “they’re data gatherers” that is so true. If they do apologize they then tell you what you did wrong to cause them to do act the way they did. Then they tell you that you owe them an apology!!! Don’t react, keep silent - their rage will build - it’s time for you to exit. Love your videos Dr. C thank you.

I had the two worst narcisstic parents . My mother would talk to me and ask me questions and anything positive she would just say Oh or ok . She never cared about my life but always acted like she did. My sisters are just like her and all betrayed me . Me being the youngest I been put down and always the scapegoat

Don't expect compliments, but know those criticisms are coming in hot!

Compliments. Thank yous. Apologies. Sympathy. These are 4 things I never, ever get from covert narci husband! The only promises I get are broken ones... I told him "Promises made. Promises broken" is what I'll put on his tombstone. It's his legacy!

So true - my Mom, on a good day, took pity on me and said "Not everyone thinks like you!" A tiny confession 😢🤷‍♀️💯

The narc friend actually sabotaged my work .She spoke behind my back about personal information I told her .She was determined to get me fired from my job .

You have described EXACTLY what I went through. Not knowing narcissists existed, wondering what I was doing wrong, silent treatment for months, criticism, belittling and eventually depressing me to the point I asked God to take my life. When their verbal and emotional abuse became physical, it was a blessing in disguise because he slipped up in front of others and the police were called. I was able to get...him...out. The lights began to come on, the clouds lifted, and I never looked back. I hurt a lot but I learned a lot. After years of therapy, exercise, and self care, I've put myself together again. A tiny piece of me still feels broken, and I hear his condescending voice in my head at times, but I'm proud of myself and victory over that bad period of my life. That person is more miserable than ever, even 20 years later. Thank God for people like you with the wisdom, care, and ability to share all you know about narcissists and how to survive them. Thank you.

Yeah-dismissive towards my lifestyle, interests, passions, and friends. I made consistent and heartfelt efforts to get to know the people in her life. Why? Simply because they were part of her life! For some reason, there was a reluctance to meet with my friends, and I hardly noticed it-or recognized it for what it was: judgment and rejection.

OMG - my neighbor - she has temper tantrums in the parking lot and drags as many people into it as she can - then a day or 2 later behaves as tho nothing ever happened. I really detest these people. I guess someone has been showng my mother what I have to say about her and the rest of the fam damily - in her weekly letter last week she writes "all i can say is that I love you." an apology would never cross her mind. there's too much to apologize for anyway.

These folks also betray their own health and wellbeing. These behaviors never end up with good outcomes ... for the targets or themselves. God help us all. Thanks, Dr. Carter ...

This is a clear blueprint from Dr. C. He's always spot on with his expertise & analysis. As he went through the list, I am sitting here like, "yep, yep, yep, yep". From my experience dealing with a covert narc co-worker, please realize nothing you say or do can change them, or their behavior. Consider setting up clear boundaries, or even going no contact if possible.

Something I’d like to add is they’ll tell intentionally incomplete info about their personal lives, they’ll pick and choose who hears what parts, and then immediately after telling something that you didn’t ask to hear, they’ll say “now don’t tell anyone else; I told you that in confidence”. There came a point where me and some other people were talking and we’re like “we hardly know this person, because we each got told fragments of the same backstory, and told not to share it amongst ourselves lest we betray the trust of this person”

All of these behaviors are not what I want to be around if the person is a Narcissist or not..

Thank you Dr. C! Dismissive, that seems to be a very key word in covert narcissism in my experience. They don't come out and say, well that's dumb. They just act like whatever you said doesn't register as worthy of acknowledgment. Subtle but effective means of conveying a message.

I just realized what I thought was my bestfriend is definitely not. She lives 5 hours away and when we make plans for me to come visit the past 3 times she has bailed on me I have already taken time off and rearranged my schedule etc so the last time she pulled this was Labor day weekend. I finally confronted her and she said I was selfish and did not understand and that my feelings did not matter. It hurt but I will pick myself up and learn from this experience and know what to accept and not accept from people from thus point on. Thank you for all you're helpful videos Dr. Carter

Covert Narcissists want to give you the impression that they can do healthy relationships when in fact they are master manipulators. Over time their micro betrayals will pile up and you will recognize unhealthy patterns and trends. Subtle ways of covert betrayal: 1. Creating false positive regard up front 2. Seeming to be loyal, yet not living up to it 3. Critisism under the guise of concern 4. They will lie by omission, Appearing to be virtous, but... 5. Reluctant/unwilling to give you compliments 6. They don't give good apologies 7. Dismissive regarding your intrests 8. Increasingly critical to others, and you will be next 9. Fishing for compliments, yet giving you few 10. Consistently unwilling to receive input Be aware: > Covert Narcissism is built upon passive aggressive anger > They want to control with the least vulnerability > They have many double standards > They'd rather invalidate than understand > They must appear above you Dr Carter 👨‍🦳 and Gus 🐶 thank you for another lesson full of insight 🌞🌟🌝🌈

EXACTLY! The victim mentality is unreal!

I cannot listen to you speak so eloquently without truly believing you are talking about my husband who I believe to be a narcissist with very covert behaviours. Everyone loves him. I’m the ‘crazy’ wife. I love your videos. They give me validation and I never ever feel crazy or confused when listening to you. Thank you Dr C ❤

OH I HOPE YOU READ MY COMMENT Good morning, and I just came across your videos yesterday. WOW… I need to tell you, that you are amazing at how you present all of this. I have never seen such an amazing way. I love the fact that you show and teach the etiquette so a person doesn’t become like the narcissist. Many leave this out and this is so awesome and amazing! God bless you. I spent yesterday just watching a lot of your videos. From JANESVILLE, WI

I knew about 6 - 8 months before that I would stop being friends with the narcissist. Something never sat right with me when I hung around them. The narcissist did ALL - to a T - ALL of these things. I'm so glad I got out.

Dr. C, these 10 subtle behaviors fit my family's covert narcissist. It's been 30 years of insincerity, manipulation and bullying with this guy. I even made the mistake a 5-6 years ago of trying to get him to make the relationship better, meaning more 'two-way' (this was before I knew it was narcissism.) He wouldn't even acknowledge the request (email); all he said was that I was the controlling one who wanted to be "alpha". I could almost taste the projection... and then started the devalueing stage. Anyway, I feel like an idiot for not recognizing the narcissism a long time ago, but I just wasn't aware. I thought 'narcissism' was just a lazy insult... so wrong, it's a family-destroying disorder. Now he's discarded me and taken my sister (his wife) with him. I'm not a religious man, but I find myself praying he gets hit by a bus, and the bus stops and backs up over him a few times just to be sure. 🤗

My ex-friend would constantly pull the "woe is me" card anytime he was criticized. He was a petulant toddler!

My favorite test is the word 'no' said right from the beginning.

Secrets! They expect detailed report about who do you talk to for how long, record of every cup of coffee you buy and in the same time live as a married single parson. Thank you 🙏 ❤Dr. C. “Activities that do not include me!” 💯

I understand. I will never be the same again after going through trauma with more than one but I know now

One of the worst betrayals I had was being taken to Wilmington, NC to meet my ex narc's best friend's daughter. Little did I know she was a phone sex operator, and the ex narc had a thing for her. This all came out while there. My ex narc was essentially her sugar daddy.This woman ordered me around, told me she knew all about me (?), and proceeded to tell me I had deserved getting my head busted open after being pushed by the ex narc. He just sat there looking down with that typical goofball expression on his face. I felt very betrayed and humiliated. I don't have any skeletons in the closet, so God only knows what he told her. She was the one with a checkered past (5 ex husband's). Even thinking about that day now still smarts.

I gave the benefit of doubt when we first met. 2.5 years later, I know for sure what I’m dealing with. Manipulation, victim, blaming, ghosting, etc. I am freeing myself. Although it’s been difficult to cut away, my life is so much better!

I also like to call conscientious, reliable, tolerant and honest people healthy)

Thanks Dr C for pointing out it covers hate, and its not just for self gain or manipulation.

They keep repeating what they want, regardless of your response. It's as if you never answered if you don't say, don't do what they want. U are excellent, we are very lucky to have a good ressource like you and your team. I really think it's important to have, talk to a specialist especially for those in couples or working with this type of individual. ☠️🧛‍♂️

I dealt with a woman like that for years anything you ever confronted her with was always your opinion

I just 41 and am coming to terms with being raised by a covert narcissist dad. I’ve always wondered why I don’t trust anyone and will literally spend countless thoughts on figuring out everyone’s scheme. It could be my dog scheming for food - he certainly can’t just love me and want to be near me( wants a treat)- or my wife’s or kids affection towards me. There must be a catch too it. Needless to say the reality of not having felt a real positive emotion from someone- love, affection, support - without writing it off as a scheme to get something - has hit really hard the past couple of days. Still trying to find a therapist and start unpacking. These videos are helping me understand and make sense of why im so messed up. Thanks for sharing these videos and shining some light on this foggy existence.

Dr C. Can you shed light on the Narc mother, in my case, and the one sided competition I never consented to be involved in. I remember as a teen her competing with me for the attention of boys my age. It was very confusing. She even challenged me to fight in front of one suitor. Thank you for your work it has been very helpful.

Just want to say, whenever I am watching one of your videos and I start to feel triggered....my gaze goes directly to your dog (Is Gus his name?) and I immediately start to calm down. 🐶❤

They take pleasure when you believe their lies. Look quick enough and you will see a smug smile forming on their face or in their eyes.

You’re describing my ex and it’s spooky.

I noticed if “mine” is kind and considerate-he is setting me up-now I watch for a few days -then the situation comes up. It use to catch me by surprise- so now…I want to have hope- but I wait for it. Take what he does & says a on surface level-he probably doesn’t mean it. Put my faith in God-not him.

Thank you Dr.C, I really appreciate your help and insight. Covert narcissist are very difficult to deal with.

““Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭10‬:‭34‬-‭39‬ ‭ESV‬‬ The truth shall set you free! When we loose everything in this life, and change our minds over to seeing the bigger picture, we find LIFE, in Knowing Jesus, and serving Him. These wicked people will have a purpose too. For us to compare, and taste and see, what is good and what is bad. Then we take up our cross, and follow the good shepherd. I pray lots of love and healing over all who reads this. Shalom ❤

I appreciate the education I'm getting from your videos, Dr. C. This information is exactly what I need. Thank you.

Exactly what I went through! I was 100% real and emotionally intimate although not physically but I thought it was great until I realized the red flags. I dumped him thank God when my gut instinct told me there's something wrong . Left me hurt and angry. I was betrayed. Need to figure out how to get over that pain now. Wasn't till after my studying I found out he is a narcissist.

The moment they open their mouth they betray you, so simple😂

When they burn all the bridges by the second half of life, and no more people left for codependency/narcissistic supply/distractions, they self destruct because all those things were only about avoiding dealing with life on life's terms. My father lasted 3 months at 63 when everyone walked away. They don't deserve our contempt, but our pity, like the bad thief on the cross even in the face of truth, they just don't have it in them to be humbled.

You're so right. It took time, but eventually I did see patterns. We would spend hours talking about his things. When It became my turn he would be busy within a few texts. He would be a jerk and rude and would gaslight to get out of it. After awhile he would say it was a misunderstanding and he can be better. I dont know why it took me so long but I finally saw that If it were going to be better it would have by now. It was 15 years of this and he never really changes. Im there to agree with him 90% of the time and if I dont I hear about it. He can mock me 90% of the time though and if I dont take it im too sensitive. He is insanely delusional, hypocritical, rude, obnoxious and dumb. I dont know how it took me so long to see it.

My whole marriage. 33 1/2 years with this guy. Spot on. Didn't realize what it was. He is also an alcoholic and a pothead. The last 9 years of my marriage I worked a 12-step program. Thats where I learned to set boundaries. He got really bad with his narcissism and alcohol use. He realized he could no longer control me.

Just reading comments, I'm struck by the swath of destruction these people leave in there wake. How many lives one person impacts as they keep moving on their own life path. We always have the choice what to leave as our legacy yet this is what they choose. I for one know I can do better, I can choose to leave happiness, joy, love, and respect for others. Namaste

So full of themselves So empty and a shell ... ?