Based.

Wedding, fair. Reception, based.

I think you misspelled the phrase "would want" incorrectly

idk, weddings are awkward for non-family members, aside from their +1, they may only know like 2 or 3 ppl, who could have other duties (like being part of the wedding party)... sitting there for potentially 3 or 4 hours with no one to talk to, the options are stare at your phone or have a few drinks; not going due to no open bar is perfectly reasonable

@@thatguy088 It kinda sounds like you're describing exactly the kind of guest that shouldn't be at the wedding.

What???? Use MY BIRTHDAY MONEY to pay for LIVING EXPENSES????? god Redditors suck so much LMAO

the two women were mother- and daughter-in-law, both of whom had borne sons and whose husbands had died. The lying daughter-in-law was obliged by the laws to marry her brother-in-law(this baby) unless released from the law by Solomon. she was required to marry him when he came of age, or wait the same amount of time to be released and remarry. When Solomon suggested splitting the infant in half, the lying woman, wishing to escape the constraints of the law, agreed. But Solomon knew that one of these was the bride to be, and could've, by law, vacated the original marriage arrangement, it was a common thing that happened in the time. So instead of just saying "listen I'm king, I'll obsolve the original arrangement" he was like, fuck it let's have some fun with these people's emotions, and then put one in jail. Basically Sol is DEFINITELY an asshole.

@@DarkRaen666 Dude where the hell did you get all of that? I just read the story and basically nothing that you just said was included in it. 1 Kings 3:26-27, niv "Now two prostitutes came to the king and stood before him. 17 One of them said, “Pardon me, my lord. This woman and I live in the same house, and I had a baby while she was there with me. 18 The third day after my child was born, this woman also had a baby. We were alone; there was no one in the house but the two of us. 19 “During the night this woman’s son died because she lay on him. 20 So she got up in the middle of the night and took my son from my side while I your servant was asleep. She put him by her breast and put her dead son by my breast. 21 The next morning, I got up to nurse my son-and he was dead! But when I looked at him closely in the morning light, I saw that it wasn’t the son I had borne.” 22 The other woman said, “No! The living one is my son; the dead one is yours.” But the first one insisted, “No! The dead one is yours; the living one is mine.” And so they argued before the king. 23 The king said, “This one says, ‘My son is alive and your son is dead,’ while that one says, ‘No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.’” 24 Then the king said, “Bring me a sword.” So they brought a sword for the king. 25 He then gave an order: “Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other.” 26 The woman whose son was alive was deeply moved out of love for her son and said to the king, “Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don’t kill him!” But the other said, “Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!” 27 Then the king gave his ruling: “Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother.” Normally I wouldn't be this nitpicky about stuff like this but I just have no idea where you got that, unless there's another account of it or something

@@GigaChadMob so it comes from the midrash which is a commentary on the Torah. It’s not confirmed text though so he can’t say it’s the proper canon.

So two women both claimed to be the mother of this baby. No one knew who was right, it was real early in the morning and I was kind of hung over from the night before. And honestly, as a king ruling over hundres of thousands of people I had more important issues to attend to than to deal with a single baby. So I just went, cut the baby in half and let's move on. My advisors got really mad at me, but it turned out okay anyway since only one of the women objected to my ruling hence she was clearly the rightful mother. AITA?

@@doggo9388 Oh, well I guess that explains why I've never heard any of that.

that sounds like a blast actually

The issue here across the board is that when someone has their wedding and then says there won't be an open bar or limit the amount of booze there will be people get up in arms. The day's not about them so they have zero right to complain, s when the people getting married say that's fine don't come then there should only be two responses from there on out. 1. Don't go and risk pissing off the couple and looking like an idiot or 2. Suck it up and go. I don't know why people feel so entitled to something that has nothing to do with them at all.

Most American weddings I’ve been to, the parents of the bride and groom pay for the whole thing. I went to a covid wedding in January and we were only allowed 30 people. They bride’s parents hosted the wedding and paid $12,000 for an open bar. It was completely drank out. I totally see where that guy is coming from and I would be hesitant to have alcohol at my own wedding with my family.

My favorite thing was that everyone's response basically boiled down to it's either his right to decide how the wedding is held, or the fiancée's choice, and immediately afterwards, when the married couple agrees on a no-child wedding, their choice is irrelevant

@@MegaRemington13 those are two very different situations. Alcohol is less of an extreme than no children at a destination wedding.

@@jpryan90 It's regional/familial. In some circles it is indeed considered humiliating and rude to have a cash bar.

landlord mindset

The not so subtle framing of "not serving alcohol" being a desire, and "serving alcohol" being a right really got to me, not gonna lie.

so not BASED

tbh American weddings are really weird in that they end really early. I don't think ive been at a wedding that ended before 7 in the morning. And if you're going to party from 11 to 8 then you kinda need alcohol, so if the people in the weddings come from Germany or similar countries then they probably have a different idea of how a wedding goes. But honestly if his family didnt have a special relationship and just didn't enjoy alcohol then there'd be no reason not to serve it, just save only the people that like alcohol drink. Free world.

and I don't know what alcohol costs in California but in Germany you could get like 2 18 year olds to serve drinks for 150€ each for the night and then go with the 3€ wine, 70c per 1/2l beer, and 12 € per 0.75l hard liquor. Or even cut out the 18 servers and you just end up paying like max 15€ per alcohol drinker, so if its 100 people then it's 1500€

worst part is that guy got voted asshole, so he's gonna feel like he has to serve alcohol now, as if his idea was wrong or unreasonable. especially with comments like that at the top. jokaire

The only exception to this is if on street parking is the only parking available, and you are blocking them from getting to their house. Like imagine a new mother having to carry her infant 2 blocks after a long ass day just to go home. And why? Because you wanted to park 2 blocks closer to the church.

The only one I can think of is that our neighbor has loads of cars and parks in front of our house all the time, but they always park a big truckor a nice care there, taking up just enough space that they're just over the edge of our driveway and we have to be super careful backing out since we keep 3 cars in our driveway. But we don't complain to their face, just complain about them amongst ourselves every time it happens, lmao.

Unless you have a driveway with no drop curb then I can sort of understand it since you could be constantly being blocked from getting your car out, so just parking your car on the road instead to block other people trapping you in makes perfect sense.

What if they block your driveway?

@@legion999 most houses don't have driveways because the land is too valuable, but blocking driveways is illegal.

SHUT THE FUCK UP, DOUG, YOU FUCKING SKUNK!

@@benh5541 I hope my mom's wig tasted good.

NTA, Dan Flashes shirts aren't even that complicated

@@ipokefan4 there’s one shirt in Dan flashes that costs a thousand dollars

@@lagspike7763 I want that one soooo bad.

It's actually an integral part of the story for a reason NL nor apparently chat didn't pick up on: if you want to take the Corvette out, where are you moving the truck in your driveway to do that when there's _someone else's_ car in front of your lawn? What happens if you work in your garage sometimes and want to take the Corvette out to protect it?

It’s also a blue corvette and everything he sees around him is blue for hisself and everybody around him cuz he ain’t got nobody to listen to

​@@Providence83 you put the truck in front of a different lawn?

I’m planning a wedding. We are having a child free reception. If that means people can’t come that’s the way it is

Yeah though having a child free wedding which excludes 6 of your siblings seems wild to me.

You dont have to be rich to purchase 2 rental homes. She is definitely an asshole though.

@@nickalaskreynolds If you can purchase 2 rental homes you are rich lmao

@@nickalaskreynolds Purchasing two homes FOR SOMEONE ELSE is absolutely rich people money

+2

@@K8lynMay based profile pic

NTA, non-Pokémon Unite players don't deserve rights.

Yeah, I like to drink at events, parties and such. Would I be bummed out if I found out there‘s no booze at the wedding? Sure, but straight up saying „If there‘s no alcohol I am not going“ is just insanity.

Where I live people waited hours to go to the liquor store during the pandemic because they thought it would be closed for a few days...

I'm a teetotaler and it makes my more introverted than I believe I otherwise would be because of how little I enjoy recreational drinking. I'd rather just get stoned.

tbh American weddings are really weird in that they end really early. I don't think ive been at a wedding that ended before 7 in the morning. And if you're going to party from 11 to 8 then you kinda need alcohol, so if the people in the weddings come from Germany or similar countries then they probably have a different idea of how a wedding goes. But honestly if his family didnt have a special relationship and just didn't enjoy alcohol then there'd be no reason not to serve it, just save only the people that like alcohol drink. Free world.

It's upsetting to see how that thread called him the asshole. It's also that stereotypical bullshit where the bride gets everything she wants and the groom is an asshole for wanting something his way.

And those guests who called them cheap are probably not generous with the wedding gift. Probably don't even give enough money for their meal they ate let alone the alcohol the guzzled down.

@@MC--- If you make me buy a special outfit, tickets to fly in, etc. I might be kinda mad if you have a wedding that isn't fun. Doesn't have to be expensive, just fun.

@@K0sm1cKid alcohol isn’t needed for that

Everyone triggered by the wording of one response.

Just yanks being yanks

This is exactly my belief too, its not my job to make sure you drink at my wedding Especially if i don't have the available funds.

Because Reddit lords would be mad if they went to a wedding with no drinks

@@NeoBoneGirl despite them all also being only 14

I wouldn't say asshole but definitely weird in my book. I've been to maybe a dozen weddings and I've never seen one without alcohol. I mean it's kinda like part of the usual package for a celebration... Food, drinks and music. People are like "oh what a redditor thing to say" but drinking at celebrations has been a part of human culture since alcohol was invented. For reference I'm European, so I have no idea if a dry wedding is actual common in the US.

alcohol culture is psychotic. it's not that I never drink alcohol, but the way people insist on it as a necessity of social situations is a bit twisted for me, and I can only imagine how hostile it makes social situations for recovering alcoholics.

I'm sorry my man. That's brutal.

Holy hell, 12 grand for an open bar at a 30 person event? Was this place super high class or did you get extremely ripped off?

Absolutely agree Brian.

That makes sense. Its hard to want to share these stories if you expect them to make you look bad

Some are more than embellished a lot of them are straight up fabrications and the more upvotes something has the more likely it is a complete story.

I can see it, i don't even drink myself, so having to pay for other people to get drunk is nonsensical.

@@Doomroar exactly. I do drink. I like to drink as much as the next guy. Maybe the next 2 guys. But like if my dude said “Yeah it’s a dry wedding because alcohol is expensive.” Then like I just wouldn’t drink???? Or if you absolutely have to have your hooch, that’s why they make flasks my dude.

@@robertdean7778 I am from a culture where wedding always involves alcohol, and while logically I agree with your point, in my country, if I wanted dry wedding my partner would probably freak out that the guests would be disappointed, and she'd probably want everybody invited to have a good time. Idk, I'd imagine it depends on the country. Getting smashed on wedding is kinda THE thing here, weather I agree with it or not Edit - on the other hand, guy was young and not from money. Cash bar would have been reasonable in my opinion

I'm thinking most of that came before the edit where he mentioned his total budget and the price of catering, because in what world is not wanting to spend 40% of the budget on alcohol make him cheap?

You could just make the reception BYOB and/or a paid bar

Employed people stuff lmao

They kind of sound like they suck

Ive been to 3 and theyve all been fine, not the most fun things ever but not massive disasters like what happens here

Weddings are just a long ceremony. Big dog and pony show. You don't need an expensive wedding.

@@cartoonhanks1708 Cheap weddings are the best. I have a big extended family so I've been to a few and it's basically like a fancy bbq party lol way more fun than stressing over big ass arrangements and enduring stuffy tradition.

Oh what's her @? Yeah lemme message you on Instagram. Totally great painter, would recommend

Yeah lol i feel like the dispute they had ruins the feeling the art brings them anyway. The argument ends itself

If you read through AITA you'll start to notice patterns. That fits with some observed biases on that subreddit

Cuz it's reddit and he's disagreeing with a woman

Reddit can be pretty depraved at the best of times but the AITA subreddit is especially petty sometimes.

I have a very small family, an aunt and uncle are both alcoholic. But they never, never, ever let that be a factor in whether we can drink at family events, even when they host. I would respect their decision if they felt that way, but recovering/functioning alcoholics need to be able to cope with physically being near alcohol, or else avoid social events altogether. Husband got blasted by reddit because I think his original post pre-edits came across as uncompromising and, in the US, having alcohol at a wedding is the default behavior, not the other way around. So people would view the wife as bending over backward for the husband in not having alcohol at the wedding. Which is at least somewhat fair...guests do think it's weird/cheap in most cases if the wedding is dry.

Well that's disingenuous. in the kids case both bride and groom wanted no kids. In the Alcohol case the disagreement was between the bride and the groom. I agree with the idea you were going for I think but this are not really comparable examples.

I think the “…” really hit it home

reddit ruined weed

@@pickledownrickonomics good

And apparently both are assholes when clearly the alcohol one is NTA.

That sounds like an incredible hat

@@mitchellhoward3209 it was pretty cool! I need to make another one, lol. That's the only problem with my ambitious ideas is that sometimes I end up wishing I hadn't sold it! It even had teeny tiny little seats that actually rotated along with the wheel!

This is so right, I'm an artist and have had friends ask if they could have some of my old personal projects. I was never planning on profiting off them, and they would cherish them, why would I refuse? Maybe out of courtesy the OP could offer a small sum but considering he is contracted to pay the painter, as the artist I would let it go. Besides, she's already creating a bad rep for herself and losing potential exposure... I know the whole "working for exposure" stuff isn't encouraged but in this specific circumstance I think it's not a big deal and she could have gotten some clients through this if she kept a good relationship with OP :/ Gotta pick your battles sometimes...

If you live in Orlando it’s probably him. Went scrolling through his page and that’s where he is.

Buy a bigger house, Logan, 6 cars is way too much

Why do you have so many cars Logan?

I’d go to the wedding, I’d just expect it not be fun

@@etc2913 sounds like you need to expand your definition of ‘fun.’

@@charliebrewster2809 snark aside, if you want to be a good host, with a party your guests will really enjoy, realize booze is expected

@@etc2913 Or maybe that just tells you that most of these events are actually boring as shayt and just a excuse to drink?

@@TheArhive imo it’s social lubricant, I’m not saying get drunk, just one beer is enough to loosen people up and facilitate a good time. And ofc you can still have fun sober

I agree with your sentiment if people claim they are self-made and show 0 gratitude to their family's help. But having help from family and then making good decisions with that help is the dream! That's what I want to give to my children one day. When giving advice it's important to have perspective. The issue with debt: most Americans have irresponsible debt. No matter how well off or how broke you are there is some debt that is always a bad idea. If you have a car loan, that's a bad decision. If you have student loan debt and didn't finish school, that's irresponsible debt. If you have student loan debt for a degree that won't provide adequete compensation to make up for the debt, that's irresponsible debt. If you put 0 down on an adjustable rate mortgage, that's a terrible decision.

@@K0sm1cKid I agree with most with what you said, but how is having a car loan a bad decision?

@@SilentMott the return on investment on a car is terrible. I live in DC tho, so metro, bus, etc... all available.

@@exlordinthedude8080 even if it's not available just get a shitbox beater until you can afford better, no harm.

But BRO! The "god-tier prices" of Socal are insane!

Welcome to not living in the most predatory consumer market in the history of mankind that actively sits around all day devising new ways to manipulate your loved one's emotions against you at the most tender moments of your collective lives.

The garage was packed because two cars in it, 2 more in the driveway, and 2 more on the street

@@TonTon-gb1hv I also heard it as they couldn't use the garage because it was full of stuff.

@@TonTon-gb1hv "Apparently, the new people have the garage packed so they park 2 cars in the driveway and 4 on the street."

Another issue with that post is that the OP has at a minimum 3 cars 4 max himself. A corvette, old F-150 wife's car and assuming he has a daily driver too.

@@TotesX why are you assuming he has 2 extra cars that were never mentioned?

It's really cool to hear the perspective of an actual artist who has had a similar experience to weigh in on that last story. I think thats a pretty fair opinion you have therr

Agreed. Who wouldn't be flattered by that reaction? Her first response was "Fuck you, pay me." Do new artists just do it for the money or something?

@@CycFlame she probably spent like 20+ hours on a mural that she could have used doing online commissions or something. kinda messed up tho that the guy was like "oh yeah ill keep the art even though it wasnt agreed upon and the girl got mad over it" like imagine being the sort of person who can wake up to the artwork of someone you screwed over and lost a mutual friend over and think nothing but "that's some neat art" lmao

@@DragoonBoom She was planning on spending that time practicing either way, as evidenced by the fact that she was searching for a place to practice. Only difference is anywhere else she would have paid for the privilege. Imagine being the type of person to threaten litigation to someone who liked your art after they gave you a space to practice in for free.

I completely agree with you. I'm just confused about one thing. How does someone cover up a tattoo? With another tattoo?

I mean, at the same time...why do you care if someone parks in front of your house? I genuinely do not understand the number of people who are annoyed by this.

@@logangantner3863 There are plenty of situations where it's fine by me! If parking is scarce, you have to take what you can get. If someone's hosting a lot of people at their house, obviously the guests have to park somewhere. If for some reason you can't park in front of your own house, you just have to get as close as possible. But if you have the option not to park in front of someone else's house, you also have to consider what that means for everyone else. In a town with curbside garbage collection, they have to put their bins around your car in a way that doesn't block their own driveway as well, which can be difficult if street space is limited. If they have to park on the street for some reason, they will have to park in front of someone else's house. In our case, we had lawn care workers coming once a week (pretty common in that neighborhood). If they can't park in front of our house, they have to either park on our driveway and block our cars in (we park in our garage) or in front of someone else's house, which means they have to move their equipment much farther to do their job. If we have even just one guest who arrives by car, now they have to park in front of someone else's house, which moves the problem to someone else. If your car breaks down, now your junker is in front of someone else's window. If it has to be towed, that'll block someone else's driveway and become their problem. If the other person has kids who want to play in the street, you can bet your own car is going to get scratched and dented eventually. Basically you're asking other people to take on a bunch of small inconveniences because you feel like being a little weird. Totally fine if they don't mind, but if they actually ask you not to (and you have a reasonable alternative) that's when you should stop. Aside from all that, if you have the option to park at your own place... why not do that? Why inconvenience yourself and risk annoying your neighbors at the same time? Sure, if it's not an option you do whatever you can, but our neighbor had room in her garage, on her driveway, and in front of her own house. She just decided to park in front of someone else's house instead, and be a jerk about it when we asked her not to.

@@SabertoothSeal I don't know, I feel like you are wayyyy overthinking this. Having grown up in a residential area that was just around the corner from shopping, parking has never been something that we took for granted, much less parking directly in front of our property. Even so, leaving garbage bins out has never even been something that I would factor as so much as an "inconvenience". The "someone else now has to park in front of another person's house, moving the problem" line really only works if we concede that it's really a problem to begin with. I don't know, maybe I'm biased against people in the suburbs. It feels like 100% of interactions I've had with people who live on culs de sac are them being angry about something stupid and petty that has minimal impact on their lives. And that was exactly the impression that I got from OP in AITA, who went out of his way to reduce street parking availability for his neighbors. Edit: I do commiserate with being annoyed at someone who is a jerk for the sake of it. But I also make a point of never trusting a person's narrative of someone who they describe as a "jerk". About half the time it ends up being them who started things on a bad foot and escalated the situation needlessly.

@@logangantner3863 You asked for my reasons, I gave them. Seems like you are indeed biased against people living in the suburbs, to use your own words. I said why it was weird in my situation, and gave plenty of room on how it wouldn't be weird in other situations. I don't see the point in arguing.

@@SabertoothSeal AITA makes me argumentative dammit!

I'm with you, but it absolutely is worse than tacky regionally and in some circles/families. It's not even really the social lubricant aspect. It's about looking poor.

@@tobyvision i wouldve never considered that. That its about looking poor.

What's more tacky, looking poor or judging people who look poor? People need to care less about people who are supposed to be loved ones if those loved ones are judging you.

@@thomasandrewclifford based

Middle-low classes feeling entitled I guess

A reasonable person would expect there to be some sort of food available at a wedding, especially when the ceremony goes on for hours.

NTA

Nah food is a must.

That's really funny though

So do Europeans not drink alcohol at weddings...?

Oh shit, another great comment from Lycos94!

And then talking about the dice he has in his pocket?

AITA for housing one of my former student's burgers?

She's very sick, though. Tell your daughter that, otherwise the other stuff isn't true.

0.o middle click? I need to get to a computer

If you middle click anywhere on the tabs while they are open they will close, but if you middle click in the same area, it will open a new blank tab. The more you know ~🌟