+Armando Gómez Cheers for checking in and letting others know. When you actually do the tapping, you get the results. :-)

+Sebastiaan van der Schrier (SocialAnxietySolutions) In your experience using EFT, does it help with all the negative beliefs that provoke the social anxiety? or just with the symptoms? I mean, one thing you will agree with me, is that all the negative beliefs avalanche that turns in social anxiety, affect us in, well, our WHOLE LIVES, not just in not being outgoing. Being awkward and all messed up in public is the very least of our problems. I would like to know your opinion Sebastiaan.

Only now see this... Yes, you can use the tapping for all the negative beliefs. And you're right, they don't just cause the perception of danger socially, they also cause insecurity, pressure, fear, guilt, shame and so on. Cleaning up your social anxiety (in most cases) therefore also causes you to improve in all areas of your life, have more emotional balance, be more authentic, know yourself better, be more resilient, etc.. Oh, and that for the rest of your life!

***** This is the case for a small percentage of people, and there are a variety of reasons for it as well as some solutions. Before I get into them, keep in mind that these videos are me just sharing some things that helped me, providing a perspective, and guiding you through an exercise to experience the power of the tapping. But, this kind of tapping is on the symptoms, and mostly quick fix. They do help you, but they're not the end all be all solution for your social anxiety. For that you need to do the deeper inner work, clear the resistance, and more. I talk about how to become anxiety-free in next week's video (How I Overcame My Social Anxiety Completely - will be released Thursday 23-4-2015) and also share an illustration that explains it. What you have to understand is that typically, especially if you've been dealing with intense social anxiety for a long time, it will take you some time and effort to overcome this. And a few videos won't solve the problem for you. They do help, but only on a surface level. You can most likely overcome it completely, but you will need to dig deeper, and take it to the next level. These videos are introductions, so to speak. That said, not being able to feel the anxiety is something I dealt with in the beginning of my EFT journey as well. I would get triggered in real life scenarios, but when I was doing some tapping on my own I wasn't able to feel any anxiety. From my limited perspective and experience, a few things that I am aware of can be going on here. One is that you’re not vividly imagining what can be going on. You might be rushing it. To resolve that, first sit down and pause the video just before the tapping. Take 10 deep breaths in and out and observe how you feel just doing that. Notice any tension, and tightness in your chest, notice the beating of your heart, and lump in your throat, etc. After these 10 breaths, slowly in and out... really imagine being in a social situation. You don't need a perfectly clear visualisation to start with. Make it as clear as you can, pretend to notice any details, make up expressions on the faces, see the look in their eyes, hear the sounds, tune into it. This could help you tune in, but this is less commonly the case when you can't feel the feelings. Though try this first! It is more likely that your subconscious has "switched off" your awareness of feeling the anxiety and negative emotions in order to keep you safe and protect you from the ongoing emotional pain. This is what was the case for me. I had experienced a lot of trauma for a long time, and my subconscious had shut off the ability to access my feelings about the past. It took a lot of inner work and healing before it felt safe to start feeling my emotions again. This happened gradually, over time. From my experience, when you are disconnected from your feelings like you describe, the online videos, or any do-it-yourself work will likely only be slightly beneficial. Like you've experienced. This may not be what you want to hear, but when you're this disconnected from your feelings, there might be other compounding problems aside from just social anxiety. And it would probably serve you best to work with a face to face therapist who helps you move past your traumas and childhood stuff. What may also help for "non-feelers" is to look into something called "Matrix Re-imprinting" which is an advanced form of EFT which combines Neuro Linguistic Programming and Inner Child work. Here you work with the images. As you clear some of the really painful traumas that happened using these techniques, your subconscious slowly starts to realise it's safe to bring up your emotions as you've got the techniques to deal with them now. And likely slowly but surely your feelings will come back. That's what happened for me too. But it has taken some serious persistence and dedication to get to that point. Tapping in the moment whenever you get triggered, and directly after are also things that can help you. Another thing that could potentially be going on, is that it wasn't OK to feel your feelings when growing up. And so you've learned to disconnect from them. This can also be treated with the help of an experienced, empathic therapist who you learn to trust. Ideally you find someone who's both a therapist with experience in EFT (+ Matrix re-imprinting). While this will take your time, dedication, and effort, it is well worth the investment. The way you get to feel is worth a hundredfold of all of any effort you’ve put in. And, the results you achieve positively affect all areas of your life, and the results benefit you for the rest of your life. Hope this helps you and best of luck. There is a way out of this. Persistence wins the race. Seb

Sebastiaan van der Schrier Thanks so much for replying in such detail, that's a lot of typing! The video of yours I watched last night has helped me significantly in worrying what others think. Today I didn't give a shit, I kind of felt normal and myself hope I can keep that up!

@@Social-anxiety-solutions awesome explanation

Laughter is a common sign of something releasing indeed, Roman. Good for you :-)

this social anexity is biggest enemy in my life.hope I will be well very soon.thanks.

how are you now, one year later?

19rulesdude I think my head has grown! Not sure if you can see this old pic on my FB, but it looked worse: facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=415436858201&set=a.415436703201.189700.537683201&type=3&theater And yes, insecurity about the way you look leads to a perception of being "at risk" around others. At risk of ridicule, being made fun of, blushing, becoming embarrassed, etc. Releasing the insecurity, and getting to a place of acceptance of your ears (or whatever thing about you that you don't feel confident about) leads to you feeling comfortable about your ears. Being teased made me hugely ashamed and eventually led me to go with my mom to a plastic surgeon to have an intro-talk about whether they would operate it and have it covered by our insurance. They were "just" facing to the front enough to have it be considered an abnormality. And because I was emotionally suffering insurance would cover it. Once I told my "friends" who were teasing me to enjoy it since it was going to be some of the last times since I was getting them fixed, they told me they'd then call me Barbie! Once I understood they just made fun of my ears because it got a reaction out of me, and I stopped caring about my ears, the teasing stopped, and I was OK with the way my ears looked.

Sebastiaan van der Schrier I hope to one day overcome this crappy disorder and be where you're at. I've wasted too much of my life worrying and the loneliness has caused my depression. Thanks for your advice good sir. I will try the tapping technique tonight at home. You've given me a lil hope.

Good to hear that, as there is great hope indeed. Just seems like there's no way out when you're in the middle of it and you've been stuck for a while. Good luck, be realistic as it will take some time and effort to get rid of all your triggers. But the tapping can give you big relief quickly.

+Shawn Cockrill Hi Shawn, I did a whole podcast show on how to get rid of the negative effects of bullying. I interview EFT Master Tania Prince on the topic. You can find it here: www.social-anxiety-solutions.com/podcast/3-bullying-how-to-overcome-its-negative-effects/

+Sebastiaan van der Schrier (SocialAnxietySolutions) Thank you so much Sebastiaann :)