The best bootleg DVD I ever saw was for the first Lord of the Rings film - which was still in cinema at the time - on a craptacular DVD from Bali, complete with a decent motion menu, yet once you hit play you ended up watching AN EPISODE OF HERCULES STARRING KEVIN SORBO. Best bootleg EVER.

So Dr Ashen has made a career out of reviewing cheap knockoff tat, only for there to ultimately be cheap knockoff tat related directly to himself. We've come full circle, people.

Nothing screams Ashens and the Quest for the GameChild like stock porno music.

Fun fact: The IMAX version of Attack of the Clones had around 26 minutes cut, and according to eyewitnesses, it was primarily Anakin-Padmé scenes that were cut. So there actually is a version of Attack of the Clones with less Hayden Christensen.

What do you do when you're drunk at Poundland? What do you do when you're drunk at Poundland? What do you do when you're drunk at Poundland, early in the morning?

I kind of want a downloadable version of that knock-off Star Wars music. That "we're going to build up the music like it's official, then let you down" works so perfectly.

"James Bond and the infinite Stevens" is a film that really needs to exist

"2 theoretical trainers" quite an interesting misread of "theatrical trailers", however i would enjoy buying a DVD that came with incorporeal shoes

I saw a fake Chinese clone wars DVD which said "Yoda pie arctic apprentice" on the back.

Someone please make a Game Child pirate that has Antonio Stella Bottom Tile on it somewhere and send it to him

James Bond and the Infinite Stephens. ... I'd pay to watch that.

I am an author. I felt so proud the first time I saw one of my books being pirated. ...It was a free book. Now, you can find most my books being pirated but I still crack up over the fact that the first book was an already free book.

If you enjoyed Die Another Da, you may also enjoy from the same series: Dr. N Thunderbal Moonrake Casino Royal Skyfal

My brother used to have a pirated copy of Blackhawk Down where everyone had rays of light coming out of various points on their bodies.

That Diablo font in the King Arthur menus.

"Turning Into Stephens." Sounds like a late-80s New Wave band.

10:29 My Dad's cameo in the Game Child movie :D Also Wez on the right.

I am crying laughing right now. Episo pe II was hilarious enough on its own, but on top of that, the first word of the synopsis is "impribity"? That is comedy gold. I NEED a copy of this DVD. Badly.

Tar Wars: Epi Soap 1 - The Phantom Mayonnaise.

9:11 Unrated version on a "PG" rated DVD? Fun fact: My dad can't tell the difference between real and fake DVDs and he brought my a Shrek the Third DVD, which I spotted as a fake the second I looked at it. It had the Dreamworks logo which you would expect, but for some reason it had down the bottom the Activision logo and the ESRB game rating too.

My favorite Star Wars was "Episode III: Remember Seth?"

I'm going to make a bootleg of Ashens' film, starring Simon Pegg as Ashens.

A friend of mine had a pirate Rage Against The Machine CD with their famous hit "knock your enemy".

A bootleg of his own movie. We meta now.

Ashens will be the 21st doctor

"George Lucas' non-union Mexican equivalent." Alec is a brilliant and funny man who deserves five additional years of life for that one line.

Episope 2, because no normal soap will wash away the dirt after watching it.

"This dvd is copyrighted" Yeah im sure it is shu brothers

The menu music for the Gamechild was the most porno of all porno music.

I think this facial mutation device was created by Marik, since one you change into a Stephen he can control you.

The Chinglish text on Star Wars "Episo pe II" is like Backstroke of the West with things like Anakin being called "anner the gold" and Obi-Wan Kenobi being "ratio-king kano."

"Hey you wanna watch STAR WARS EPIS OPE II?"

I used to have a pirate copy of xmen origins wolverine. It wasn't the finished copy though it was the working copy with all the halved finished CGI. I watched it & it was hilarious.

0:27 -- I'm convinced that was just him saying "Hello, Stuart!" to himself.

I love how "Die Another Da" was apparently produced by "Cbarbara Broccoli Callum McDougall Anthony Waye Michael G. Wilson". I wonder if she's friends with Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla?

I like how the menu for the Gamechild bootleg was just a picture of the Blu-ray container with text slapped on it.

The lamest pirates are not the ones who actually do exciting things, like shoot cannons and get in sword fights, but the ones who have a neckbeard and own a shitty DVD reader/burner.

1:38 Just for fun, I watched this part again but with the video muted and the actual Star Wars title music playing in the background. Believe it or not, the speed of the text is incredibly accurate to the real thing! Well done!

My dad once picked up a pirated copy of Pirates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End. For the actual disc they had just used a standard CD-R and to clarify what film it was glued a small picture of the cover of the actual DVD to it. Pure Genius.

Blew the whole production budget for the year with that text crawl did you?

I can't wait to see Idris Elba in James Bond and the Infinite Stephens!

I have a bootleg copy of Spider-Man (I don't want to send it it, but maybe I'll Rip It) It is just the movie recorded from a theater, and the movie has a completely off subtitle track, it seems like a Google translation of the Chinese track. "remember the bigger your right the heavier your responsibility will be" and "I have a car get in Maybe there is something interesting"

I love how on the menu of attack of the clones, it says "Star wars II, The Phantom Menace" @ 5:48

That menu music though...

I like how it said Episode II The Phantom Menace in the menu. Its confused with its identity.

Stephens is the successor to Antonio Stella Bottom Tile.

Reminds me of the DVDs sold at the dollar store. They come on a cardboard card with just the title printed on it.

Die Another Da Die Another Nyet

After seeing numerous people whining about Stuart bringing other people onto vids - that weird irrational phobia to any and all change that a lot of internet-dwellers seem to have - I want Stuart to do nothing but feature guests from now on. Purely to force the dipshit brigade to leave and allow normal people to keep enjoying his videos. It's not just Ashens either, every video producer suffers from this nonsense. People who become fans because of a particular video, then expect every subsequent video to be exactly the same as the one that got them hooked. It's so bizarre to see people actively wanting a producer to stagnate and grow bored due to lack of variety.

I have to wonder, did anyone ever claim the reward for getting them the actual disc for the bootleg Ashens and the Quest for the Game Child? If so, what was the reward?

"Turning into Stephens, I think I'm turning into Stephens, I really think so."

The back of Episope II... It's like someone wrote the crawl text in Setswana, Google translated it with the beta for that language... and was then phonetically copied by a Dane who listened to an English travel disc once.

Did anyone else notice that the Star Wars Episode 2 pirate uses the Episode 1 main menu?

_James Bond_ featuring James Bond... ...doesn't get much better than that!

In China, KZfaq is blocked, and even if you get around it with a proxy, international speeds are terrible, and it would take a long time to download. Streaming as you watch definitely wouldn't work. Official movies are banned, with few exceptions. That's why people still buy cheap pirate DVDs.

This Star Wars DVD gets a 0/10 because they don't have the French Audio Track! I paid good money for this audio track and it isn't included. =(

when i was iraq, i bought a bootleg of mission impossible 3. It was, i swear to god, a man filming a tv playing a bootleg of someone filming the actual movie. BOOTCEPTION!

I fucking lost my shit at OTHER DAY

I actually have a pirate of Attack of the Clones as well, and it's got the same text on the back, but... spelled correctly. It's the same paragraph, but all the actual words are spelled correctly. Well, most of them; "Faceses" is preserved, thankfully. In some cases it's actually funnier because it refers to Amidala as "the aegis amydala the rice". It also features the credits for Disney's The Kid on the back cover, but filled with typos and with the wrong parts written in large print most of the time. It seems to star my favorite actor, Lilytomlin Chimcrride, and the music is apparently by Marc Shaiman Costumes (presumably they ran out of budget and needed to get the guy running the costume store down the street to make some little jingles on GarageBand). It has a copyright infringement warning (or Waring, as it's spelled), which states that the disc is "For sale or rental only by authorized sublicnsees of Wamer Home Video" and that "Violators will be rosocuted". But the best bit is that on the case's spine and on the disc, it says WARS STAR II. The title's *two words* and they still got it wrong! I'm sad it has no subtitles, though. There's a semi-famous pirate of Revenge of the Sith that has the entire movie in hilarious Engrish subtitles, called Backstroke of the West. I was hoping this would be the same type of thing as that but with Attack of the Clones instead. ***** , are the subtitles on that disc written in Engrish like the back? If this is anything like Backstroke of the West, you might have comedy gold right there.

In Turkey there are shops full of pirate DVDs, including titles just out in the cinema.

I almost died at the crawl. Whoever wrote that deserves an Oscar.

I used to have a bootleg of Silent Hill. It was missing a whole part after the Ash Baby scene. It suddenly cuts to Rose in the school.

the Paul Bettany special feature on the first DVD makes more sense now since he was in Solo: A Star Wars Story. Also, Ibarra is a city in Ecuador, and a few of those random names are real people. I think the person making the back cover just threw whatever they felt like on there.

I hate sand...

From my own experience as a pirate DVD conneseur (mostly reading up on them online, I assure you), I have come to learn that for whatever reason, a lot of pirate DVD makers like to put on their DVD covers the special features or credits lists from Knight's Tale and Lady In The Water. They use other ones on occasion, but every third or so pirated DVD you will come across from around the mid-2000's to early 2010's will do that. I really have no idea what the preference is. Availability, maybe?

Don't you just love it whenever you buy a DVD and it has both the PG version, and the R rated version on the same disc?

When I was a kid I obtained a bootleg of the John Cusac classic, 2012, from Mexico. The movie itself was your standard bootleg quality. The subtitles were a trip, though. They were in Spanish and English. The English ones appeared every once in a while, like the subbers just kind of forgot that they were supposed to sub the movie so random text was thrown in here and there with no regards to context or punctuation. The Spanish ones, most of the time, had nothing to do with the dialogue from the movie. It's like they made up their own impromptu Spanish dialogue to fit what was happening on the screen. The scene in the beginning where the ship salesman is trying to get the Arabic guy to buy tickets for the ship, the Arabic guy says "$1 billion is a lot of money." And the salesman says "I'm afraid the amount is in Euros, your highness" the spanish subs said "$1 million dollars is too much money" and the response was " that is just what is required" I loved it.

I actually have a pretty bizarre one. I have a disc that contains three movies from late 2003 and it came in a big long case. The movies were Cat in the Hat, Looney Tunes Back in Action and some film I can't remember the name of about alien dogs. The menu was fairly basic, just a blue background where you could select the movie by scrolling over the image of the poster they used for it. The quality itself was actually very good.

This video is so "Classic Ashens" it makes me smile

Most of my DVDs are pirated like that. I've literally have an entire box of them that includes all the home alone movies and Barbie movies up to 2005. Malaysia, I love ya.

"Hero Judy warrior" Is that Judge Judy settling divorce disputes with a lightsaber?

So is "Die Another Da" the direct sequel to "From Russia With Love"?

That Epis ope II crawl text still makes more sense than anything we're hearing in the run up to the UK General Election...

Really liked the music played in the Gamechild menu. Sounded like Death Chamber from Sonic Adventure 2.

I love how the Attack Of The Clones package says it has English and French language options, but actually has English and Chinese.

When Alec first said hello I thought it was just Stuart putting on a voice and talking to himself.

I like how worried Ashens always is about copyright infringements, going bonkers when a commercially availible song pops up on a device or radio, but now reviews pirated movies and uses the Star Wars intro. :D

the menu for star wars reads" episode 2 the phantom menace" lol

I thought this was just going to be Ashens showing off his library of pirate themed DVDs.

Halle Berry is played by Jinx in the movie, of course.

1:44 Thats some Your Grammar Sucks gold right there.

Reminds me of the bargain bin DVDs we get at Walmart and the dollar stores, I even managed to score a copy of Diacron 5 (under its Space Transformers moniker). Fun times, horrible prints, drinking game fodder.

My favorite thing is when Stuart doesn't notice something absurd when he first looks at something and then it cracks him up when he's recording. :)

The way you flawlessly pronounce the words in the floating paragraphs is brilliant.

Who is the bald guy with the beard? I've been a fan of Ashens for a while but I have no idea who that man is.

I just noticed that there's a sad onion etched into the Ashen's DVD cover, lol.

I can’t believe how many people gave me fake DVDs of movies from Thailand Vietnam and Indonesia bootlegs and when I traveled overseas in early 2007

Thank you so much for showing the title screen. I’m so curious when I see these how the quality would be. I have picked up some DVDs and CDs myself based on the hilarity of the translations on the covers, or the cover itself. It’s fun, like collecting coins or something.

I went to china a while ago and literally there are fake DVDs everywhere costing 10p a disk. They came in those bags but were neatly folded so that there was no line, the quality was the same as the original. Honestly I would prefer these not to watch but to frame for they are pieces of art.

Turn on auto generated English captions throughout the whole video.

Episope II genuinely made me laugh out loud. Brilliant idea with the opening sequence parody, Ashens :)

I remember my old Fellowship of the Ring vhs ripoff, with custom english over chinese(or other asian language) subtitles. The one line that still stuck in my mind is the scene in Moria where Boromir spots the cave troll and the subtitle says "shit, they have a king of holes.". Good times.

Was the description of the back of the Die Another Day box ripped from an old magazine?

"Turning into Stephens, I think I'm turning into Stephens, I really think so!" dunna-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh.

"Leaving his face looking like an Ian." And now I have the mental image of one of my coworkers, coincidentally named Ian, appearing in Die Another Da. He definitely has a face that looks like an Ian. It is a good face, VERY Ian indeed.

I love the inexplicable leaves and compass in the scene selection of the Ashens and the Quest for the GameChild bootleg!

Ah, bootleg DVDs..My favourite bootleg Star Wars DVD is the Episode III one with butchered subtitles called "The Backstroke Of The West".

Please do one of these again in the future, it was absolutely hilarious! xD

The Star Wars title crawl killed me of laughter 😂

It's 4:36 AM, I've not slept all day and I'm completely out of it. Imagine how confused I was when I suddenly heard you say "Hello, Alec!"