You realize this is not real right lmaoo.

You realize he was making a joke right

you realize certain people are too dumb to understand jokes right

Whoosh

WoW I JuST reFRenCd ReddIT InTTernEt pOinTS FOr ME

What if he did?

I thought he said it was going to kill doves

*Kill Bill theme song starts playing*

This was from 2012, that was after Steve Jobs was already dead.

Just a part of parliamentary politics, it doesn’t matter if it’s democrats or republicans

😂😂😂

Lmao

that and the fact that the Bidens know their drugs.

He got a stroke and is losing his grip.

​@@anonnimoose7987Nah bro he was just taking in the vibe

This is. Pretty much a thing It's called Gerrymandering. Talking bullshit for a long time to fill the space. And stop things from getting to a topic they don't want included

​@@kharnthebetrayer8251 gerimandering is drawing electoral boundaries to give one side an advantage. This is a different thing

​@@kharnthebetrayer8251 are you dumb or is this a joke?

@@kharnthebetrayer8251 No, what you're talking about is filibuster. Gerrymandering is redrawing the boundaries for electoral districts such that one group of voters with a certain inclination are grouped with a majority opposition so that that opposition wins the vote.

@@kharnthebetrayer8251how did you confuse filibuster and gerrymandering…

What

We stan Republicans who walk slow

@@von111 what

Zürcher 1896 Not understanding the schmood is cringe bro. Hello boomer department?

Zürcher 1896 bruh 😂😎😎😝🤤

Yeah I was believing it until my brother pointed out who it's from lol

Yes, but just swap the parties around

Trev Barlow it could literally be either or. both dems and republicans are much more similar than anyone gives them credit for

@@nephilimx3 pretty much. It just depends on which side has less control at the time.

they do it on purpose

Seriously it's Nov 6th 2023 and I laughed so hard at this.

@@manlystan100 me too

Lol that’s what the White House cocaine was for 😂😂

Hunter

that guy Biden knew must've been trump

Foreshadowing for real

At least he could read then. Now he just stares into the abyss while hes malfunctioning

its been 5 years how are you man?

@@corny8258 lmao.

@@corny8258 He's not answering, RIP.

F

F

I could actually believe this tbh

I actually believed this

Oh shit, this is fake? I would believe this in a heart beat xDD

Hold up, this is fake?

I was actually wondering if this was real. Lmao

The only difference between satire and reality is only a few years

Low iq 💩🤡

He froze again yesterday

Bruh there really should be an age cap for congress

This wasn’t satire, its a premonition.

​@@ashupashu5559 Okay. But without an age cap most will be old since they'd have more time to consolidate their power and influence.

@@MrNote-lz7lh Solution: term limits. Lots of people like the idea and it makes sense.

Pedro Jorge C. S. Rodrigues for people inside the USA this seems like it could be real also. I wouldn’t doubt someone would do this.

Wait. . This was not? #peopleoutsideUSA

Taufieq Adi Negara no it happened

no it doesnt

@@adamduncan1760 didn't* and also it did lol

Best part

The way he changes his face when he says you'll have to help me😂😂😂

Lmao, gold, right!?

Oh no “It’s gone limp. He’s doing it again”

Couldn’t agree more, one of my favorite jokes in the video

Someone at The Onion has a time machine

I wonder if the speed would come in the form of a white powder.

Arcanean Voltaris i was thinking same thing lmao

ye

I have no idea what's going on

Arcanean Voltaris yep

This is such a washed up comment

I KNOW! It BASICALLY LITERALLY IS

Once a Senator talked for an hour about his mom's Apple pie recipe during one filibuster!

@Indie Arts thanks for clearing that up

Basically Literally

@@DaltonPepple i was trying to show that too lol

Give it 4 years. Surely it would happen.

Me doing presentations in school

yes

The craziest part is that it took him a minute to speak ~.5 of a word on average there.

No you fuckface

It took me almost 1 hour to read that.

And Latin has been obsolete since?

I didn't

I'm not gonna keep arguing, i didn't delete my other comment. Period.

@@dontspikemydrink9382 yes you did. And what's the point of writing period when you finish a sentence with an actual period anyways. I mean obviously it's used to draw emphasis to the end of a sentence when speaking but when written, kinda comes off as redundant

did not.

AHAHAHAHA THATS GOLDEN

@@user-px7xp6rw7c ok, vtuber cancer

@@user-px7xp6rw7c its the onion

@@user-px7xp6rw7c You're a little slow aint ya?

@@user-px7xp6rw7c "goodbye from australia" Says the man with a japanese name, anime pfp, and claiming that there are no socialist countries on earth

*Aaa ppprrrooo --- gggaaammmeeerrr mmmooovvveee...*

But yet the best studios come from the West Santa Monica Studios, insomniac games,riot games, naughty dog. And the shit ones that are not from here charge MTX up the ass

@@unknownplanet1072 r/whoosh.... I think...

Toori Baba he is saying that no quality game studios are in republican territory, which is correct

lol

Ben Armstrong 😂😂😂

I saw them the other day, they've made progress but only by a few yards

Can someone confirm is this real or not?

@benarmstrong bro it’s not the republicans anymore. It’s Nancy Pelosi and the dems, who FROZE the articles of Impeachment😂 she ain’t walk-in in slow motion. She’s in nooo motion

@@brettbaffa8652 no

and at the start, I actually thought that this was real. the speed gave it away. yes I'm a simpleton

@@sam1fi683 lol

@Andrew Cargil yeah there are some headlines that make you think "wait, is this the onion?" then you realize its some mainstream media

@Andrew Cargil the onion should do man who dropped more bombs than the last three US presidents combined to be awarded Nobel peace prize that would be a great piece of satire that one

@@balsham137 epic joke

The coments sure agree...

Same!

Same bro 😂

@Rural Sweatshirt it's 2020

It started with sayin Obama is President

So true.

It's feasible, news has lost alot of integrity since Trump ripped them a new asshole and they post onion like content at times. Hopefully we get real news again instead of this Cnn stuff.

Considering all of the shit going down in both journalism and politics, I wouldn't be surprised if future historians thought it was all real

@@cahzinarx904 you're not biased at all.

They already do. Just look at the recent comments

@@masterchief9291 Just like the news

Aight seems legit.

Aight we finna head in

Ha

I didnt think that.

Me and the boys 'bout to testify before Congress on the issue of numerous financial crimes committed between 1992 and 1993

Except when used properly, watch Bernie Sanders 8 hour filibuster where he uses it at intended.

Collins His philibuster made me like him lmao

@@TGEGaming224 It also gave us Bernie Sander lofi

Gloomy Lobster Bernie sanders lofi is what I got to sleep to at night

Yeah if you have an IQ of 60, perhaps.

Chunky Chew 😂

hahahahah!

That's when you know you're in 2019 :( .

Chunky Chew Congratulations - IQ 20 points below the average

that's mean this isn't real?

be grateful

pardon me just passing through muy muy grateful

It was moving slow, it takes awhile for it to reach its intended target.

Anonymous Anonymous your not being serious are you?

@@greatclipz4141 This libtard probably is

But democrats are doing it, Biden can't say 2 words without messing it up 🤣 "she was 12 I was 30" "Chian is good folks, why are we hating on China"

@@V34035 Oh well, anybody is better then Trump.

@@dirtyshinobii You just read that and still think Biden is better 🤦 If republicans are slow then you guys must be snails 🤣

@@V34035 Biden isn’t a good president, but anyone is better than trump. He was an ass.

@@dirtyshinobii how does Hitler sound

I never knew americans had this much stuff going on

He's a bit more... droopy

That's just his turtle genes. Oh and the willingness to do absolutely anything for partisan benefit.

@@T33K3SS3LCH3N lol

He is one of those psy vampires from what we do in the shadows. He simply sucks the energy out of the place

Truly sounds like some shit Boebert, Greene and Gaetz would do.

Kinda want to join them doing this stuff

it's a parody

@@motanujora2380 Nah this shit actually happened.

​@@motanujora2380 historical revisionism smh, this shit really happened

World politics you mean, other countries people are starting riots over government problems, and police in other countries are gassing them off the streets.

@Big Reiner Sanders 2020

@Big Reiner KAG

@@ShiggyMomo LMFAO, Trump made it worse. Turns out the Swamp needed more monsters in it, and the Moron in Chief obliged.

@Big Reiner 20 for Obstruction and being a moron, and 20 pineapples up his ass.

Ridge frost yea those democrats and libertarians hate good people

Devin M. Conservatives hate good/smart people*

@@karenswanson3969 Lol you all are just using the same points at eachother, you both are sheep

Tsunvalley You’re probably a conservative that watches fox 24/7.

@@karenswanson3969 Im not from the US so no, i dont watch Fox News. Do you seriously believe there arent smart and good conservatives? You and Devin´s viewpoints are so black and white.

After reading the first sentence , I was offended ...

@@hilal_younus oof which onion did you bite lol

It's why they don't even do vids anymore, they can't make things up crazy enough. A burning ball of rage was going to run for pres after the 2012 election. It was orange....... They basically gave up trying to make vids, because they realised theyw ere telling peopel what to do....

satire is dead

You know I dated with a woman who thought it was true. She screamed at me about how it wasn’t funny. I was upset in the moment and happy as I look back on it, what an idiot.

especially considering the last comment about biden. holy crap how did that man win the primary

I mean McConnell pretty much did ruin politics by encouraging every republican Senate member to not pass things with Obama's name on it and to ensure "he was a one term president". So this has been true of the party for over a decade lol

Katelyn Harris he also ruined it by placing the nuclear option of 50 votes to confirm instead of 66. It’ll come back to bite him in the ass hopefully

Oh i thought it was real. I guess 2020 has set the bar this low.

Apesh Rujmel because people liked him more. He had actual plans for implementing policies, not just unrealistic goals.

how do you ignore the relevance of stalling republicans, and focus on joe bidens crack baby

Bespoke: Reality copies what the Onion reported 5 years prior

what is this format

Clifford the Dog your username and profile bother me, ppl say Hillary or trump are evil but you sir have received a ticket to hell

Nothing American impresses me anymore with all the crazy shit they do lol.

JAY SAVAGE / Lol, k.

Lol its the onion... its a joke

Assume what you want, yet I legit thought this was real. I't s not a knock at the USA. I just wouldn't be surprised if this was real....which is more alarming. 🙄

@@thewaywardgrape3838 every joke has a bit of truth in it.

Genie: You have Three wishes. Whos There: I wish this were real. Genie: Well, you're in luck...you still have three wishes.

watch the Lewandowski hearing it’s not far off from what both parties do

The closest we’ve gotten is Mike Lee’s hilarious use of memes to explain the absurdity of the Green New Deal lol

Surprisingly this isnt too implausible...

Opposition do a lot of that in Japon, like they walk super slowly to vote

crispy rock what?

@crispy rock stfu how dumb are you

@@parzival9307 he is that type of person who wears tin foil hats because they think aliens will brain wash them... don't listen to him lol

@crispy rock lmfao wait a min u think the Dems killed george floyd... Or they are hiring people to riot

@crispy rock or how do u think the Dems "created" the riots 🤣

MadOrange644 this is where I get all my news from. Only people who get straight to the facts

if you say cringe u are gay

@@LowBudgetJustinY cringe.

@@noether9447 lmao what a madlad

f1rebreather123 if you get all you’re news from one soured you yourself aren’t reliable

Not for the one on the receiving end.

I need you to help me up

president did it

So his health is bad?

Norman Lee about No obviously not you idiot.

:O im in singapore

Nowadays this kinda of stuff is pretty mundane and normal in the US haha

@@AcolyteOfLucifer yep ron johnson(r-wi) forced the senate clerk to read a 600+ page bill out loud delaying the stimulus bill by 10 hours

I also live in singapore ayy

Nice profile pic

The latin part got me rolling on the floor.

People are watching it in slow motion and are still waiting for the Latin version.

Joseph G. Hotto it is critical of no one and is making fun of republicans

@@clone9159 Republlicans, who are right about Democrats being hypocrites.

You clearly havent watched the putin assassination one...lmao...i was literally rolling on my bed laughing

Ate the onion

Reminds me of George Costanzas reaction to the lazer guy

Somebody remember where we parked

Republican and gotta say - this right here? Fucking top shelf comedy. We desperately need the Onion to make videos.

@@TheMonteCarlo yeah this is funny

they actually make fun of both as the democrats are being shitty asshole too basically both side is bickering and causing on each other which actually true till this day

Humor only comes to those who are willing to examine the truth of a matter.

Josh Thom it’s funny but at the same time its sad because those are the people that make decisions for us that affect us.

*still opening the bottle of water they bought 20 minutes ago*

*still buying the bottle of water they bought 20 minutes ago*

Still taking the bottle of the shelf they started doing 20 minutes ago

Anders Buch Jeppesen still heading to the store they bought the water bottle from, 20 minutes ago

Still trying to put clothes on to go to the store, 20 minutes ago

Yes! Wow, I'm going thru old liked vids and randomly came here

Actually, they act more mature in this parody than real politicians.

Daniel H 0.0 You're right!

now whos doing it, bitch

You’ve got a point they don’t need a single bad idea from us lmao

@@GalacticSlayer mitch McConnell

I’ve never laughed so hard in my entire life

It took me out too!!!! I'm dying 🤣🤣😭😭💀💀

lacrimis volvere faciem meam XDXDXD

“How do you say this word?” 😂

I laughed way too hard on that part…😂😂

Neither can the onion anymore

@@franklinwbush9005 Its due to budget. But they are gold

@@kejiri3593 They "were" gold.

@@kejiri3593 You're better off catching the Bee these days.

SNL never did

Step1: Trump is impeached in Congress. Step2: Impeachment papers don’t get released to the senate. The onion is literally as good at predicting the future as the simpsons.

Except the ones wasting time and doing the stalling are Demonrats.

@@a_fatality Let's be honest here, both parties suck. There ain't no lesser of two evils, both sides have dabbled in bullshit & get paid while doing it. An honest politician is about as rare as a flying pig.

No one's making out the connection that Democratic candidates are speaking in another language (Spanish)?

@@jefftheindianchief8279 I disagree that there is no lesser of two evils, but I do agree both parties suck most of the time, wayyyyyy too much corruption.

LMAOOOOOO

"VIce President Biden has urged his congressional colleagues to counteract Republican stall tactics by doing a bunch of speed" is what they actually said

@@wdwfanatic1394 ""Because he thinks he knows a guy who can get some""

@Kurishev Tulipov of course it’s the guy with the Russian name lmfao

@@cart4092 so racist smh cant stand the bullying of the minority russians go through such psychological torment im calling the internet p*lice

@@cart4092 bigot

Followed by a 5 hour long Q&A session

with a single question

@@vm_duc and the question was "why"

Still relevant.

Same, but it's welcome

Mitch McConnells new plan

Im not complaining. 😂

Because it was satire 7 years ago but now it’s honest reporting

Don’t expose us😔😔

Everyone hates a filibuster

@@jjs8426 Except Joe Manchin

Good things Dems are now removing it

@@AcolyteOfLucifer No because Joe Manchin blocked it

Yes

Merican' politics*

@music MUSIC this was what you call a joke

@music MUSIC every side and person in the history of everything will do anything to be right.

Stfu Daniel

Some democrat women spoke for like 12 hour straight in order to prevent a law. Reality outsmart fiction.

@@wowthatscrazy5222 www.google.com/url?q=www.theguardian.com/world/2013/jun/26/texas-senator-wendy-davis-abortion-bill-speech&sa=U&ved=2ahUKEwjBi9nYhfHmAhUADWMBHYSIB8kQFjAAegQIAxAB&usg=AOvVaw0eXdIA4QHURiu-RvWxn5ID Took me litteraly 20 second to find, moron

@@wowthatscrazy5222 Wow you're smart, handsome, intelligent, **and** funny! Not.

Yeah me too

@@romualdcaffeserre6230 it is a practice done often by both democrats and republicans, look up filibustering, Ted Cruz did an almost 24 hour filibuster back in 2014.

That’s why we need to end the 2 party system

@@ericrobinson155 And replace it with a multi party system that isn't any better? Multi party systems just result in party pacts that last 5 minutes before they fight each other.

His "guy" is his son Hunter

Borkborknomnom 9000 that’s literally what every other country does. 1 party is bad look at China.

@@ericrobinson155 The US isn't a 1 party system though. It's a two party system and its only a two party system because other parties really don't offer that much. Adding more parties doesn't solve partisanship or corruption.

At least it was until they made the filibuster only take saying "I filibuster" and then nobody can do anything for until you say "I stop filibustering." Honestly, silly as it was, the old style of filibuster at least protected minority interests by forcing them to determine how much physical strain it was worth to try and stop it. The new style just means nothing gets done.

All of them are real. Especially the fake ones.

Time to pull out Harry Potter then pull out a computer and read the mounds and mounds of terrible fanfiction

Filibuster seems like a perfect time to burn through LOTR tbh

Alternatively, you can force Congress through shitty YA series's to really test their endurance. I recommend Sarah j Maas

Filibusters are literally the funniest thing to me ngl

@@HufflepuffBaseball42313 *logs on to ao3* *sees harryxsnape fetish fic* *logs off of ao3*