A toxic relationship is like putting spoiled milk back in the fridge and expecting it to taste better tomorrow.

They don't WANT YOU back. They only want YOU to WANT to come back. The two things are completely different. 😢

Giving a narcissist another chance is like giving them another bullet for their gun - because they missed you the first time.

Going back to the narcissist, is like failing a test you already had the answers to. Keep moving forward, don't look back you're not going that way.

Being in a toxic, abusive "relationship" is like being gassed with poison. You can't think or see things clearly. But once you are out and breathing fresh, clean air, you won't believe the amount of bullsh!t you endured from the narc. Forgive yourself because you couldn't see. Then leave when you can see! Run!!!!!!

Never accept them back .. They never change 🏃🏾‍♀️ 💨

"Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God, and He will come near to you." James 4: 7-8

‘Other people’s happiness, disgusts them” !! So spot on doc! Even a child’s happiness is a target!

The best advice in a nutshell, “Trust yourself. Hold on to your reality.” Thanks, Dr. Ramani

I kicked the Narcissist husband out Jan 2, 2024. It has been the best 7 weeks of my life. I have so much trauma to heal in me. Don’t let them back in!!!!

Not only has the narchole not changed, it gets worse! EVERY time you go back the abuse gets worse than the time before. Horrible viscous cycle. Its no way to live.

I had a psychologist tell me that the problem was me AFTER telling me that my ex had anti social personality disorder. This psychologist also said I did not have PTSD. I went on to see two other psychologist, one for victims of crime comp who did a proper psych assessment and formally diagnosed me with PTSD. My ex did horrendous things to us and my dog. I will never blindly trust a psychologist again because not all are good.

I had an ex try to come back, saying that he might POSSIBLY have colon cancer AGAIN!, I said, “what do you mean again, the last time you tried to come back you said it was POSSIBLE prostate cancer.” He couldn’t remember his previous lies. 😂😂😂

He tried to pull me back in and I told him “I am no use to you, I can not make you happy” 😄 and that was that. I have to state it the way he understands- people are of use or not and I’m not 😉

imagine how much they could actually accomplish in life if they put that energy into positive personal progression instead of targeting other people and trying to make them as miserable as they are... joyless beasts.

My dad asked for forgiveness for everything he has done to me my whole life and it seemed legit. It felt real for several months, but it was to get me to do what he wanted. Then he went to his old patterns again.

The future faking is so hard to let go of. All the plans, hopes and dreams. 😢

I still love my narc ex, but i would never go back to him. It's the hardest thing ever... 😔

My narcissistic ex asked me if I wanted to move back into the house to help me pay off my debt, that I accumulated from the divorce, faster. 💀 He said, “since neither of us are pursuing anything romantic with anyone else, you could rent a room for cheap at the house and pay off your debt faster.” he was looking for that control back. So wild. Unhinged and manipulative behavior.

you have saved my life and opened my eyes to things I couldn’t assign a name to. I’m now aware of narcissistic abuse and have been putting 100% energy towards my healing and self improvement. I’m a proud truth teller, it gets lonely but it’s better than dealing with the poison of narcissism. Thank you Dr.Ramani for enlightening me.

I feel lonely, but I know that if I come back to him I would be even more lonely.

Narcissists are allergic to happiness. I had one of my family members driving me to the airport, and I had mentioned how the flight had been paid for by the friends I was going to see. this family member said “Oh, I wish somebody would pay for my flights!” they said In a condescending tone. the first thought that went through my head was “Try being nice to people it works”, the second thought that went through my head was “ Why are you getting mad at me because I'm excited that I got a flight paid for? Just be happy for me."

30 years ago my husband moved out and in with a woman he was having an affair with. I was a mess. A week later he wanted to come back home. I wasn't ready for him to move back. I went through a lot of pain and confusion. Married 18 years with 2 children. I was numb from the verbal abuse and didn't want him to come back. I was filled with confusion and couldn't make a decision. I asked a therapist for help. Her words took the weight of the world off of me. She said that he made that decision when he left us. I had nothing to decide. I felt so free! Those few words helped me tremendously. I hope it helps someone else today who's struggling with the same issue.

I told my therapist my husband would not come with me unless I told him the therapist needed to talk to him so he could help me. Oh, it worked, and when my husband realized what was going on, he never would come back. The very next time I went, the therapist asked me why don't you get a divorce. Wow just one session is all it took. I did get that divorce. Best thing I ever did.

Journaling is your memory, that is why it is so important to do it.

They do change they get worse 😢

“Like using your real name while you’re in the witness protection program” That’s it in a nutshell!❤😂

The more I watch Dr.Ramani's videos, the more I realize how strong that huntch was, that I was living with a narcissist. One thing that is true about journaling is that it will bring you back to reality. When healing starts, you tend to look at things more positively and want to try and make mends with the narcissist. It's almost like a spell until you read your journal to find that you've already tried that and failed miserably. These videos are a blessing.

Hoovering is harder to avoid when the narcissists are in your family of origin. I have become increasingly indifferent to them.

“I’ll be better” They say. You find out they relapsed and almost died.. then tell you “you’re not worth this abuse!”, when you find out & try to hold them accountable for their actions. Grieving the death of someone still alive is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. And I’ve been a psych RN 15 years 😢

Narcissistic relationshiT .. is like being in a room w carbon monoxide … slowly killing you without you realizing it . 😢

"Do not engage is not a short term strategy. It is a forever strategy". I need to hear this over and over again. It is a FOREVER strategy. They will NEVER change.

In response to narcissistic abuse & neglect, I was behaving so badly-sex, drugs, alcohol-that I think my ex believed couples counseling was going to be about addressing my issues. But it quickly became about addressing his part in making me miserable, so to speak! And that’s when he didn’t want to be in couples counseling anymore. PS: We’re divorced now.

Doc. As a therapist, I agree with you, we need to be alert. Narcs can be very charming and manipulative even in therapy sessions

My parents were in "couples therapy" (father was an alcoholic narcissist, mother his codependent/enabler). They suggested that I and my brother go with them to "work out our problems as a family". I tried one session with the "therapist" after my parents had gone to him. I found out that they had manipulated the "therapist" into believing that I caused all the problems in our "family" and my parents had painted me as the "unhinged one". But they didn't want to acknowledge the other unhealthy dynamics happening in our own family tree (the verbal and emotional abuse happening between both maternal and paternal siblings and my parents/siblings/me, my parents' physical abuse, etc). After that one session, I decided that I wasn't going to let my "parents" continue to manipulate the "therapist" into gaslighting the abuse and projecting all the blame onto me. So I started to see a different Social Worker away from my crazy-making parents. I attended group sessions with other survivors of Woman abuse. I learned that my parents weren't going to change their behaviour, and I had to start cutting ties with them. Leopards don't change their spots.

I ended things over 14 months ago, completely no contact, blocking him on everything, and avoiding him at all costs. Though I'm not a 100%, I am healing daily, and definitely far better than what I used to be....thanks to messages like this❤. After so many failed attempts of him not being able to reach me, he showed up to my mom's house last week, pleading how he still loves me, and he made a mistake, and that "I'm the one", and so on, and so on. I've learned the lesson behind this, I will continue to heal, and I refuse to let this disturb my progress. Thank you Dr Ramani!!

A great reminder for everyone who‘s been harmed by a narcissist, if they actually sincerely respect you, they‘ll leave you alone. People with this disorder have a deep pit of emptiness in themselves where the ego is. And the self perception. And the only true healing they could achieve at least in my opinion is by healing that ego. And closing that pit within themselves. And that is their journey. Most sadly cannot make it that far. Letting them back into your life only tells them that there are no long term consequences for their own actions. And they need these consequences to understand that there is a point where you cannot keep asking people you have abused, intentionally or not, to get back into their lives. Because you‘ve messed them up and that is something for many ppl utterly unforgivable. And the narcissist has to sit with that. And sit with that for life. This is especially for those so desperate to be good people. To be fair people. Fairness and being good isn‘t just about giving people second chances. It‘s also about doing the harder sometimes even ugly things to show someone the limit of their actions. Some people go to jail. Some don‘t learn from it. But we don‘t let people out of jail prematurely if they just ask nice enough. Ya gotta think of it like that. Actions have consequences. And some are life long. But a good actually reformed narcissist, and remember they are rare, will leave you alone because they understand that that is their part of actually do the work of being a better person. That is them caring for you. It‘s accepting a hard reality for your sake. That is real human goodness. And if they don‘t even handle that, then they have no right to get back in. Stay strong. And don‘t give in. And if this really is about guilt from your end, just try to see it as you refusing to give someone trying to be sober alcohol. You are their alcohol. And getting clean means no alcohol. Not just a little bit. Not alcohol later. Not alcohol in a few years. It means never again.

I don't think they care if you're happy per se. I think it's just that you're out of their control. Being happy is just a sign of your independence.

I went to couples therapy with my x. At the therapy, he told a bold faced lie (of course). I confronted him with that lie afterwards,his answer told me all I needed to know to divorce him STAT! He said “the therapist wouldn’t have liked me if I told him the truth”!

I've "managed" flying monkeys by detaching, staying in my own lane, finding new sources of support, and holding onto my truth. I trust that in time, my character and work will speak for itself. Thank you for your invaluable advice.

My grand daughter went for couples counselling where the counsellor was probably versed in narcissism & after many weeks suggested that they may be better parting - the narc was absolutely furious of course!

The "fantasy" aspect of awareness in this video is very powerful. We all want the change. Narcissistic relationships are like record deals... you'd be better off going independent with your relationships rather than taking a loan out with the worst interest rate given by the narcissist. Think about it. ❤

I'm 3 minutes in and it's like you're telling MY story!! This is exactly what happened to me 😢😢😢

I thought about couples therapy with my Ex. It was gonna cost me $100 & I didn't think he was worth it. I divorced him. Now I'm much happier than I ever thought possibly! GOD gave me the strength to walk out of the door for good!!!

Twisted Things Narcissists Will Do to Get You Back 00:27 - They Will Hoover You 10:15 - They Will Agree to Go to Therapy 21:44 - They Will Promise to Change 34:58 - They Will Use Flying Monkeys

And if they can’t get you back, they’ll get you back. 👀

I wish I had found you decades ago. This explains SOOOOO much

Once they see you doing well, after having broken you, they jus t see you as a renewed source of supply. You were like a well that ran dry, and has now refilled. And of course they are perpetually thirsty.

He agreed to therapy and we went. The therapist said we needed to take a test to help us get a better view of how we are in the relationship. It was $50 and he started a fight with the therapist so much she told him she would not take us on as clients. I was was so shaken and apologized for his behavior.

The therapist completely took his side and I walked

Couples therapy helped me immensely! I acquired the answers I was seeking, and in that last meeting, I realized I had to leave a dead and disordered relationship and quit trying to fix something, and someone who was beyond damaged. It allowed me to move forward and find happiness with someone else❤

Exactly! My mother was the narcissist in my life. She never changed for the better because she believed she was just fine as she was. Her personality actually got worse as she got older & she reverted to being a bratty, tantrum throwing 5 yr old by the time she died at 75 from cancer. She wasn't speaking to me when she died & didn't acknowledge me as her family. I refused to be her personal servant, so she began to do things to harm me in passive-aggressive ways. She would hit & kick my pets whenever she could. One day I came home from work to find a strange man taking our washer & dryer out of the house. She had sold them so that I would have to drive 10 mi. in winter to do laundry. I had let her move in with me because she couldn't afford to live alone. Once she started hitting & kicking my pets, I made her move out & into elder housing. When she moved she left all pictures of me behind, any gifts I had given her & all of my artwork that she had saved. After her death, while going through her things, I found some of my clothes that had been oddly missing. She was a sick puppy & never changed. She got worse.

What I find so revealing is...this ex/person wants u (me) to understand why almost every single relative/friend has finally abandoned them. And why he is lonely and alone. They just don't or won't get it. They just never figure it out.

Always over thirty years. Every time I said I was done..."I'll go talk to someone, I know I have to it's me, I'm sorry" way too many times but never went to therapy. I thought it was from drinking when we went out, I didn't know it was narcissism. Big fight after every event we went to over nothing. Your videos are what made me realize after 30 years nothing was going to change. I wish I had this info years ago he robbed me of my youth and made me so depressed I feel like I'll never get better. But I'm starting over and its hard, but I won't take him back. Thank you Dr. Ramani

I don’t think my ex-boyfriend is going to try to get me back, even if he wants to. His ego is too big.

I'm living with the twisted sick things my narcissistic sister has done until our mother passes. She decided 2 of us "had more than her" so she had our mother deemed incompetent and put her name on mom's house deed. She has canceled the land line mom had for 65 years so we cannot call. And when I visit she makes all kinds of demands and issues orders. It goes on and on. And she thinks she can "work me" but my only concern is our mother. My sister hoovers me but I'm immune to her efforts. So glad I finally started disengagement. Once mom is gone I'm 100% disengaged.

Being a person who always looked for the good in people, and not really understanding my part in why relationships always seemed to take a turn toward dysfunction…it’s taken me 40 years to accept people for what they are (not what they say they are, but who they show they are) and then either stay or go. Sadly it’s been family that say they love you then, they are the ones that will lie and trash talk and employ flying monkeys to control, and hurt.

My narcissistic partner suggested a counselor. It was before we started having any issues and yes, he was quite charming. One session didn’t go his way and before the next session he dumped me. He knew I’d be impressed with his willingness to go, he just couldn’t keep it up. It was another game. These people are so damn destructive.

I had left, and he called me to tell me he was in a car accident, I rushed over, just to find out it wasn't true.

Thank you general for helping us win the war on narcissists!😉

Hi Dr Ramani. I would NEVER go back with him, nor will I ever even speak to him when/if I ever see him again. This just doesn't pertain to him, but anyone who acts and speaks in that "certain" way. They come off as CHARMERS. I still hear our songs now and then, and I do listen. Before I would cry and turn them off. NEVER TAKE BACK A NARCISSIST! One final thing. There are no flying monkeys bcse he had no friends.

My narc ex used to blame the stress of his job on why he wasn’t an attentive boyfriend. He blamed his bad attitude on his abusive dad, and his mother passing away when he was young. He then started to blame me, and I mean for everything. After saving money and working on my career, I fought to leave the relationship and moved. He bullied me financially and emotionally constantly while I did it. He finally threw a Hail Mary and quit his job to prove that “he could change”. All he did was create more time to constantly abuse and hoover over me. I will never forget this experience and no, he did not change. He got worse. I am still in the process of removing him from my life and I started this process two years ago.

Couples therapy pushed me over the edge. I heard him say things that were absurd, unyielding, and felt like a fist between my eyes. I had to give up hope he’d change. I had to stand up for myself and stopped being his door mat. 25:50

Hoovering... Just in time for 🎄🎄🎄🎁🎁🎁!

WATCH OUT FOR YOUR RETIREMENT $! my dad blew their home sale money on himself and on his deathbed told me I'd have to take in my mom~ that was fine, I would've anyway, but no money meant I burned thru all my retirement savings to keep her until she could get into medicaid as the state demanded my household have ZERO money or assets. Lived in my pickup 7 years broke and homeless ~ thank God now into housing . He was sadistic abusive narc~ to both my mom and me for 65 years ~ only figured that out with Dr. Ramani's videos in the last 2 years. THANK YOU DR. RAMANI!

I have had a woman I was dating fake discard me happen seven times over a year. It always starts with a stupid argument over something not important. The first time, it was over she didn't like how I was dressed. She dumped me but took me back the next day. So why dump me if she made up the next day. I think it's all about control. The message is that she can dump me for real anytime they want. I had a Christmas dinner with her and some friends. She was talking to my friend's wife, and I was talking to the husband. She talked shit about me the whole time. I was sitting next to her, and I could not hear the conversation because of background noise. Not going with her anymore. It ended a month ago. Am feeling so much better.

Suppose the narcissist returns with a civil suit making false claims of "sexual assault?" Can't exactly disengage from that. Using the legal system as her flying monkey. The very PROCESS, (draining our retirement savings with legal fees) is the "punishment" for having called her out on her bullshit. Any suggestions on how to explain narcissistic abuse to a jury? Thanks.

I have a narcissistic sibling that would always tantrum during any happy moment in my life, make a scene, and then gaslight others into thinking that I instigated something. Anytime I got hoovered back in with her, anything happy that had happened *without her* was ripped apart. She made absolute sure that I had no happy memory of anything, ever. Even simply telling her that I had a good day would be enough to make her rage and ruin whatever made that day happy for me. Family vacations and outings were impossible. She also hacked my social media accounts when she found out I got engaged. My parents were usually the flying monkeys that got me hoovered back in; so when I went no-contact with the narcissist, I had to go no-contact with them, too, and that’s the part that hurt the most.

Dr Ramani, you're so precious. 2 years and a half of no contact and then she reached out like nothing ever happened, 2 years... I'm happy and quite healed, but I still need some reassurance after reading the message, she can't see I visualized, she will never know. It still amazes me how those sick people think they have the right, it's just nonsense Thank you for all the support

My narcissistic ex agreed to couple's therapy because he wanted to data-mine me for my most painful topics of discussion. He sat with his arms folded, insisted that the therapist and I were ganging up on him, then cited the cost as his reason for quitting. The truth is that he wanted to know my childhood wounds and vulnerabilities, so he could exploit them. Once he had that information, he cancelled the sessions.

"they are probably strategizing a rebranding campaign"... 👏👍🤣💯

The narcs seem to know/sense when you're happy and out there doing your thing. You may have made new friends, have new interests - you're active and living your life. Your focus isn't on them anymore - can't have that. That's when they try to break in again. DON'T DO IT! - It will never get better just worse. Now they respect you even less than they did before.

Funny this particular video of yours about hovering shows up on my feed. I haven't talked to my toxic narc sister in years and now she is sending me messages on FB concerning my brother who was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. I followed back her on FB and she started right away with her mean toxic shit. I unfollowed her without engaging. This morning I woke up and she has AGAIN sent a friend request. I am going to completely get off of FB once again. I only got on to use marketplace and maybe connect with old friends. Big mistake. Fool me once... I love you, Doc. Thank you, again. 😊

When my wife and I first got married 17 years ago she didn't like me not being at home all the time. I would hang out with my aunt and twin sister. She assumed that I was cheating and she wanted to go to marriage counseling. I agreed to counseling. She found a counselor and set the date. So we went and the counselor read right through her. After that first session, she stormed out of counseling and I told me we are never doing this counseling shit!!!! Now, I had to leave because the verbal abuse and disrespect became unbearable.

Thank you Dr. Ramani. You literally saved me and my 11 yr old daughter from further psychological and emotional trauma.

this lady does these videos day in day out week in week out month in month out year in year out!!!!! I have healed my narcissist abuse problem but have lost my fuc* ing mind watching this stuff in loads!!! 🤣😂😉

Thank-you once again, I electrified my boundrys ❤

Your podcasts are excellent. I was healing but then had a hovering set back through his lawyer. Yes They don’t want you to be happy.

Aww you sound poorly Dr Ramani, please get better soon 🙏🏻 and thank you so much for all your help and hard work ... peace and love from the 🇬🇧 💕

I feel like our therapist was not well versed in narcissism which caused me to feel more crazy. So damaging. She was definitely drawn to his charisma

I’ve been in couples therapy twice with my spouse. Both times, my spouse broke off the therapy for “financial reasons.” The first therapist took me aside for a moment toward the end and said, “Get out now!” I had no idea what she meant at the time. The second time, it started out rocky and then I really started to lean into the process. My spouse discontinued the therapy again for “financial reasons” when the therapist started shifting to working with me more. Prior to watching these videos, I really didn’t appreciate the pattern or its meaning.

After many arguments and all the disrespect, I thought that he was really fighting for me. I actually thought it was a romantic gesture, how much he was trying to get me back. But once I realized that he is only trying to figure out whether I’m still under his control and influence. I felt ashamed that I even considered giving him a second chance over and over again. so don’t get fooled by somebody trying to test whether they still have control over you. There is nothing romantic about it.! As a matter of fact, if somebody had really loved you they would let you find your own peace. The fact that somebody’s calling you multiple times and texting you endless messages is assigned that they are trying to terrorize you rather than love.

Dr Ramani, positive thoughts sent your way from my heart get well quick, We need you feeling good! 💗 Personally you have been my rock since the last discard!

I've accepted I have a pretty weird mental set-up. But the one thing I'm truly grateful for is once I emotionally detach, it's permanent. I've tried rehashing one or two old "friendships" with narcissistic people. They tried the same garbage, despite my obvious growth; I saw it for what it was and walked. I didn't take it personally. And I never let them get close enough to do more than hurl insults. Perhaps I was curious more than hopeful. But my curiosity is now sated; and since they're basically all the same there's no need to beat a dead horse. Sweeping generalizations are typically my biggest pet peeve. But when it comes to PDs, they all follow the same playbook. It's like they're the same person, just with different faces.

My ex was on the neglectful, self righteous narcissism side of things and I think that’s why our therapy experience was different than what Dr. Ramani suggests. It was very quickly evident to our therapist what the dynamic was. It was clear that I was suffering and that’s why my ex ended couples counseling very quickly once the focus became how could he be a better partner.

I must have had an exceptional couples therapist. After 3 or 4 weeks he asked us to go for separate sessions. I don't know what happened in my ex's session, but the first thing he said when I went in was "You should be looking at permanent separation, at the very least, otherwise divorce." At first I decided to get back together with my ex, but it only lasted for 6 months, then I called it quits and never looked back. In some ways I regret my decision, but those 6 months killed all the love and compassion that I had for him, making it easier to deal with him during the divorce.

Thank you for these very illuminating talks. They are helping me so much in identifying patterns that have almost destroyed me but that I thought were specific to my situation rather than to a broader area of toxicity.

They want you back to get what you have for themselves. They really don't care about you. But they play games to ruin you.

33 months post narc, no contact. Had to move away. Blocked everything, and no social media!! 99% positive he can't get to me. BUT, this video is a good reminder to stay vigilant!!!

3 years later, I made it out! No more Narc wife! No more egg shells when I see the jeep pull up to the house or hearing her footsteps upstairs. No more devalue and no more threats. I pray for my physical health and mental health to heal 🙏🏼 1-13-24 9:08 pm Central “Walk through the fire and the fire will not burn you”

Everything comes with an apology that somehow leads to being your fault. I feel stuck bc they are so apologetic and make you feel bad for their life. How can someone be so sorry but yet have absolutely no self control. It’s mind boggling , draining and it feels like a never ending cycle. They overstep constantly. The hoovering the unnecessary love bombing It’s just a back and forth. They feed off of it it’s scary truly. Never know what they’re capable of …

This compilation Rocks, especially the part on Couples Therapy. Thank you!

So thankful for all your work. It has helped me tremendously

You are right again as always Dr.Ramani🙈❤️❤️❤️,....thank you for reminding me these things

This entire video is so incredibly important. Lifesaving information. Thank you as always Dr Ramani ❤

12:02 “It can paint a picture that makes the narcisisstic partner look cool, calm, collected, and even long-suffering, and create the narrative that the other person--you--is harried, nagging, unhinged, complaining..." 😢This gave me a stomach-clenching flashback to mediation with a coworker who sadistically tortured me in my first office job. I eventually told her if she didn't at least communicate the information needed to do our jobs I'd be forced to ask our boss to mediate. She then secretly lied to the boss, pretended to be the victim, and suggested mediation herSELF, but with a counselor provided by the parent organization.👿 I don't know if she met with the "counselor" first to spin a false story or the guy was just really that incompetent, but he accepted everything she said at face value and essentially told me I was overreacting and it was all my fault. When he then asked why I was crying, I said it was because she was lying and he believed her. He just looked at me coldly and said some bulls@%t doubling down that my reactivity was the problem, and ended the session.😰 I have run into several people who used to work less closely than me with the demon coworker, one of whom was still visibly distressed by it over a decade later, and another who told me she had to go into therapy because of it! A**holes don't always win in the end, though. Not long after we worked together, the evil coworker was left by her partner, and she ended up dying *decades* younger than average life expectancy. So did a nasty middle manager in our small workgroup who had taken the demon's side and tortured me herself on top of it. I didn't wish either of them dead, but it gives me great solace to know they're not on the planet anymore and can never hurt anyone again!!!! GOOD RIDDANCE is their only epitaph!

I just have to say thank you Dr. Ramani. You have incredible content that has helped me out tremendously with understanding the dynamics of narcissistic abuse and how to handle it. As you already know how extremely difficult it is to be with/ have been with a narcissist, your work has greatly impacted my life for the better and I can’t thank you enough 🙏

Thank you for being the saving grace that covered me during the hardest season of my life ❤

What an amazing and enlightening series Dr Ramani! You hit on so many things in my current relationship. I can see so many things that have happened in it and probably will happen if I don't stop it. As you've said. These people never change, and even if they say they will it is only for a short time before they revert back to what they do best. This brings back many recollections of events that I handled badly because I wasn't aware that Narcissistic abuse was occurring. I recall sitting in my car in a lay by most of one Christmas day eating chicken sandwiches because of a bust up fuelled by him drinking followed by the nasty comments. I can now see the flying monkey's also saying "just what are you two like" and "there's always 2 sides to a story" and " I'm just playing devil's advocate" me getting the blame for just keeping everything together as one should instead of paying attention to your partner even when they don't appreciate it. My god, so much truth being said...

Get well soon Dr Ramani. ❤ Thank you always educating us.