Story 1: UPDATE 4:10 Affair fog is lifting from ex girlfriend Story 2: 8:04 I found out my husband cheated on me with strippers and I feel dead inside

*"You weren't good enough/you're not good at sex"* is NOT an excuse.

Story #1: Please . . . PLEASE . . . don't turn into Captain Save-a-Ho.

Whoa... slow down, OP #1. DO NOT say “she doesn’t have money.” A judge will say “we can fix that” and give her your child and your money.

"Affair fog" is implying that she isn't really herself when she betrays you, you are supposed to think that what happened during the "affair fog" phase is not part of who she normally is. It's for people who can't or don't want to accept what their SO is capable of doing, what is part of them.

If she dies... She dies, -Ivan Drago

#2 You and he have agreed that cheating is a deal breaker. He has no respect for his mom for putting up with his dad's cheating. Give him the same respect he gives his parents. This is the case of the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Show the texts to the other wives/g-f's and find a good lawyer.

That last story hurts my heart. I'm a single man, 40 and no kids. I want a woman i can love in my life and kids. I can proudly say i have never cheated on anyone i dated in my life. I just have terrible luck with dating. I've usually been cheated on or due to career been seperated from someone i truly got along with and they end up happy with someone else. Which in turn makes me happy to see them happy. I used to be the typical nerdy guy that all women would pass on. But since i started working out they all think I'm a player now. Life sucks

Story 1: go no contact. Only talk to her about the child and nothing else. She is trying to play on your emotions and manipulate you.

Fr, my groupchat is just me an the bois sharing marinade formulas, ammo prices, fishing spots and car shit

The second story. They are like the Avengers of cheating

Story 2: That's literally a relationship base off of trauma bonding.

Sounds like your brother was trying to warn you of husbands actions.

I seriously need an update to that second story.

You know, for Story #2…he sure acts like his cheating father for someone who says he hates cheaters

I hope the second story gets an update

Most men on reddit who gets cheated on starts to feel sorry for there ex when things don't go right for them.....don't really understand why the men do... Do they wanna be a doormat 🤔 when there ex comes crawling back....

They don't miss you, they miss your wallet and what you did for them.

My advice is simple tell all the wives and girlfriends what's going on in that guy group. Especially in the group chat. In addition prepare yourself for either your husband begging for forgiveness or be prepared to have your husband battle you to death in court. The Other Women just as much if not more needs to know then you do.

Last one, i think the husband would have always ended up cheating, just because someone says they have a hatred towards cheaters doesnt mean they wont become one. I think he has too many unresolved issues regarding his family that he cant get past and is just being exactly what his dad is, he created himself to be the person he hates the most, his dad.

Not everyone cheats. People may say it as it sounds normal to them. But one thinks is normal is usually far from majority.

The last story pisses me off b/c that's the kind of wife most men want. Trash like him ruin good women like her. This is a reminder that women go through the same cheating problems as men and those of us who want faithfulness need to find each other and leave cheaters out of the gene pool.

I will never understand why people who have nothing and bring nothing in the relationship cheat. Jobless, homeless if anything happens amd yet still do it, what kind of mentality leads to such actions...

I feel so bad for spouse that get cheated on. I just think I would go crazy on the cheater if I was in their situations. It is just so maddening to do to someone.

Story 2: Honestly, lusting after people you aren’t in a relationship with is a pretty normal thing, and can be healthy as long as it stays a fantasy. But Christ, most people have the willpower and human decency not to cheat. I’m in a relationship and talk about cute girls with my friends all the time, but damn, an entire group chat for cheating? I feel so bad for OP. She’s had some seriously bad relationships with men.

Wife: why are you being so cold when I text you ? Husband: I dunno maybe because you cheated and abandoned your family

Wait she's unemployed. He has custody of the child and the money. Logically the father is in the best interest of the child custody wise.

"The good spouses end up with the wrong ones" -Sun Tzu

Dont walk... run. Establish paternity and then custody. Make it legal.

Should have tied things up with a lawyer before you went into the Psych ward, . . . . .that will definitely be used by her.

If i was op in story 2 i would've gotten all the women together and lawyers involved. Destroying these boys would be my ultimate goal. Cheating is a huge deal breaker 😤😡😠

That second story reeks of a creative writing exercise.

Funny how woman use that same tired excuse. If u felt he didnt love u then YOU SHOULD HAVE ASKED HIM!! N if its bout affection or time wit each other then tell him so he can fix it. Cheating NEVER HELPS!!! No dude she cheated n u kicked her out. U dont give her money or help her wit ANYTHING!! That's her problem NOT URS

Imagine cheating on your spouse and by extension children because they don’t pay enough attention to you, and having the nerve to think of yourself as an adult or a good person.

Blaming a woman's clothes for her man's infidelity? Stupid.

Bragged about it but was bc was emotionally hurt my a$$

When your partner burns the bridge.. don't give them a raft to ride the river...

First story do not let her back into your life and do not let her back into your son's life until she does these three things. 1. Have a job that can sustain you for up to six months and that's not temporary 2. Have your own place to where it's more than 6 months of living you've only been living there for more than 6 months 3. Have your mental health checked out for at least a period Of one year before you're even allowed anywhere near our child. If the ex does not do any of these three are all of them to say the least then you need to prepare yourself to request for custody child support and potential termination of parental rights

Story 2: That husband and his friends are fucking disgusting. I hope she exposes them all to their partners and everyone else. They don't deserve to be with anyone at all or ever. She needs to leave this man ASAP. He's a huge POS along with his vile friends. There's 0 excuses for cheating and them bragging and joking about it like that is just more reason for them to be exposed.

Last story... Stand up for your convictions. And... If it does end, Baby, there's tons of fish in the sea. That don't cheat.

Damn can a man not just want a genuine relationship in these days

For the second story, I would say that is a big breach of trust...but then again all of the incriminating evidence presented is something to be very disturbing. I would take the whole group conversation and print them out to be distributed to friends, family and employers. Cheating is the cowardly thing to do. It destroys not only the relationship, but even a persons identity and self worth. If don't want commitment then you shouldn't commit. This is one of the worst things a person can do without being considered a crime. Take all the steps to preparing yourself for separation and independence before confronting him.

Story #2 - You are hurt right now, and can't see men as anything other than "the enemy." My ex-wife cut me off from all intimacy and physical contact for a full year. She admitted that I had done nothing to deserve what she put me through, but also indicated that our situation was not going to change. In all that time I was faithful to her. And even though I initiated the divorce proceedings, I was faithful during our 1 year, state-mandated separation, before we were eligible to schedule a court date. I had plenty of opportunities to have sex with other women during that time, and did not act on them. Not all men are "cheating pieces of shit." I went more than 2 years without sex, and stayed loyal. Even though I had no intension of reconciling with her and I was constantly being told she didn't deserve my loyalty, by every man and woman in my life. Some men value their word.

Story 1.....why in the hell did you go to the psych ward?

Get full custody and get child support. Lets see if the courts will throw her in jail when she fails to provide for her child.

First story has all the markings of a narcissist. Is your son actually going to be better off with her in his life? She sees him as a meal ticket. That's horrible. Her son should be her NUMBER ONE PRIORITY. Not you, not her fragile ego, not her AP, none of it matters compared to him. But guess what, your son took a back burner to ALL of that. Your son is her security blanket. Disgusting. Get sole custody. Offer her liberal visitation if you feel that strongly about it. But do not give her an inch of custody. She has no job, views her son as a pay check, has easily cheated on you, and shows no remorse by continuing the affair until he dumped her. That's not a wife, and that's not a mother. She needs IC before she can try to talk about 'being civil for the sake of our child." She also needs a job to appreciate what you'v done, and to be able to support herself and have her child over. Right now she's a bum. A bum that can't even appreciate her only kid.

Man I can't even get a girlfriend and these pieces of trash are cheating on the people that are committed to them. Some people don't know how lucky they are to even have someone that loves them.

Oh, for that second story.... Here is what I would do. 1. 11 weeks is a blessing in disguise, 12 weeks is a deadline in my country, so I would IMMEDIATELY get a termination without his knowledge. I could never bear a child, let alone a cheater's child, one of my greatest fears. 2. Make sure I capture the whole nasty chat on video and screenshots. Save the files safely, for later use. 3. After termination, I would pack all my stuff while he's at work and prepare to ghost him, but not before... 4. Print screenshots of the nasty chat, highlight the most abominable parts, leave it around the house 4.1 maybe neatly arranged on the table 4.2 maybe a 100 copies of it just thrown on the floor 4.3 maybe I would make a path of roses leading to the bedroom where the prints would be waiting on the bed. 5. While riding away with all my belongings I would send the captured nasty chat to everyone in question, offenders and offended, going nuclear as there is no other option. 6. _Cool guys dont look at explosions_ Epilogue: serve the SOB divorce papers

S2- I would suggest she send a group message to the wives stating that she and her husband have always had an open phone policy. She felt insecure about her husbands new secretary and opened the group chat. Tell them she is disturbed by what she found and took screenshots of it, that it effects their marriages and offer to send it to them before sending it (some might not want to see). Then Suggest they ask there husbands if there is anything they(husbands) want to tell them(wives). When they say no, they(W) should let them(H) know they have access to a chat but haven’t looked at it yet. Then let the chips fall where they will. I really want an update to this story. Smh

In thr last story the husband and his friends sounds like the jock character in that typichal drama from the 90s/early 2000s.

I don’t want to see her hurt herself. It’s not on him to save her but her safety is in danger. Some one should make sure she gets help. Not op, but a friend should help her

Go to court and get full custody she abandoned her child

I like the part in the first story where the gf says she needed to cheat cause she felt her bf was distant. That’s not an excuse. When I have a gf I would hope she would feel like she could come to me if she feels like I’m growing distant. If she makes me happy I’ll do anything to make her feel that way too.

I am so connecting with this chick. And since divorce 2 more acutely that men.... you really gotta look closely at the not so obvious 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩. Sexual fidelity really is important and social media paints it as a negative far too often. It’s quite sad😖😖😖😖😖

Dude you don't Co-parent with a cheater. You don't want your son living with a sex addict mother parading a new boyfriend by him every week. Everyone acts like it nothing, but it's far from it to an innocent kid. Who just suffered, likely the worst trauma of his life.

Last story... You can ghost him. You can do whatever you want. He did. The one night is not an end all to marriage. But the constant talking with friends about cheating and what not is. Seek counseling immediately!

Imagine thinking there aren't a lot of terrible women out there too. Just because you got hurt by a guy doesn't mean all men.

I feel sorry for the first guy. Why would you base your life on someone else so much that it affects you that much? Come on man move on.

First thing he should have done: GET A LAWYER. It doesn't mean you have to take her to court right away, but talking to a lawyer will inform you of your options, the dangers, etc. Even just buying her that ticket or allowing her to visit the child can change things legally... An old co-worker of mine came home one day to find half the furniture missing (all her stuff gone), and their child - she tried to refuse him access to his son, he went to court and won shared custody because in the Court's eyes she "abandoned the marriage" when she just up and moved out behind his back. Talk to a lawyer, know your rights.

Nobody should be married or have a kid with someone after 2 years stop that people

That part about flipping switches on who you care for helped me realize I may have sociopathic tendencies

I have no pity for cheaters. Anything good that happens to them personally hurts and vexes me.

I just love it when the Karma train comes to pay the wrong-doers a visit at the station. It gives us hope that Karma doesn't care about entitlement, feminism & a liberal family court system. It brings back faith in humanity again! The sun rises, the new day's dawning, the birds are chirping and life is good again!

She didn’t admit to her friend she cheated - she bragged about it. Big difference.

I mean....good luck, goodbye, and good night!!

The second story. If you chose cheaters as partners 3 times. Then it's not the men. The problem is your choice of men.

S1: Nemesis - ever the child of hubris. Poverty has a knack for cutting arrogance out of the heart like a dull, rusty spoon wielded by a blind man.

Man seeing op 2 makes me sad. That is a deep pain that leaves a deep scar.

Op should have gone to a lawyer the moment she found that group chat.

Guess I’m a robot or a narcissist I can almost completely control my empathy I just use logic to drown out my emotions it’s like my logical impulses can overrun my emotions if I want to I usually use it to keep calm when people try to bait me or when dealing with loss but yeah

Story 1: She cheated on the guy, can't get or at least maintain employment, has no stable residence (the couch surfing) and to top it off, has openly admitted to serious thoughts of suicide and yet she expects to be given full custody of a child!? Even if the guy wanted to, no sane judge would grant her ANY custody as things are, she should greatful to even have supervised visitation rights as things are. That guy needs to protect his kid, and at the very least keep full custody and even seriously restrict visitation if any is granted at all. Because, at least for now she is actually a serious danger to that kid.

2# There's no forgiveness possible because all his friends will encourage him to do it again. Unless he cuts all of them out its impossible and even then, why bother.

Damn 11 weeks pregnant, I couldn't have kept the child.

Get a lawyer immediately

Never base your self on others as they will do what makes them happy reguardless of the cost.

I couldn’t be an adult and come to you to sort out our difficulties. I had to.

My ex said she regrets cheating all 3x(that i know about)...

Yea.... OP should just ghost the ex the moment he gets sole custody of his son. He will be better doing it, that chick is only trying to get money out of him and nothing more. Yes it bad she in a terreible state but that is all on her. Choices have consiquences and the ex must now live with it.

Their are no cheating men out there we are underappreciated and usually nice guys, which they say nice guys finish last.

She had better not get their son. Not for the sake of money. That's morally bankrupt. She would be using the money for the child for money for the child. The kid deserves better than that.

Child abandonment does stand up in court

Me and my friends all have a group chat we talk about every the occasional explicit material gets shared. But none of us cheat. It’s basically memes that’s shared

Her mistake was opening that group chat

I've never understood the whole premise of cheating like honestly why? Why would you damage any of you relationship or even just future with someone? Why would you even see someone else like that who isn't your partner. Like seriously?

You don't pay attention to me so I had to cheat. My mind melts from this logic. This makes no sense at all I assume communication never works anymore. Maybe she can text him or Instagram him snapchat. So many way to communicate with others and yet she felt him not loving her anymore. A sorry excuse indeed.

Only sociopaths and robots don't feel something for people who make bad decisions of their own free will, huh? That's cute. Fact of the matter is, if you weep for the dumb you'll be crying all day.

If these guys are making lots then you can expect this behaviour

Story 2: This is so interesting. I don’t have any group chats like this man’s. But then again, I’m not considered ‘alpha’, so interpret that how you will.

She got this guy to pay for to cheat on him

The fact that the last OP is aparently frequenting mysadristic subreddits like is really sad, this experience must have hurted in a way that i cant even descibre. Hope she can clear her mind in the future and that her baby is fine

Not 100 percent sure how custody battles work but if she takes this court and it’s bought up that she’s suicidal and has been admitted into a mental hospital as a result then giving OP sole custody should be a slam dunk for him.

Wheres part 2 to the second story😭

That's not even affair fog. The money branch point is dead on And the one who said he'd deserve what is coming to him by allowing her into his life. They might have saved his life.

You are right, I don't know where you found your guys and all but there good men on the planet. My husband was saying that he feels like a gay man, like other women are beautiful but he doesn't care for them. We did go through alot and alot of deal beakers not related to cheating though. But we solved it. I don't think all men do or will eventually cheat. There are some big lows in a long- term relationships that may make it more attractive at one point or another but as far as I'm concerned no one in my extented family cheated except for my grandfather but he had mental issues that made the cheating almost like nothing compared with all the rest he put his family through and we only found out when both my grandparents were dead and from what we can tell my grandmother never knew. No one of my friends cheated as far as I know. I think it depends on the type of guy you are surrounded with. There are those men I call players who just love women too much to be faithful and monogamy is nearly impossible for that type. But usually when men are committed they are committed. Surround yourself with other type of guys who value relationships and you will see that faithful trustworthy men are existing on the planet. The others are just not as worthy and some are downright disgusting!!

That's a tall glass of nope on the first story. She left and didn't give a shit while doing it. She only wants to come back because she has nobody nor does she have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.

If someone isn't happy being in a relationship with you, they have the right to end it. Just because a relationship is fulfilling during a period of time doesn't mean it always will be. Move on if it doesn't work anymore. Relationships should be fulfilling on both sides.

Get a Divorce Once a cheater always a cheater there not going to stop !

She abandend her kid, do nothing for her, nothing!!!

#1 Get a lawyer. Listen to lawyer. Get custody.

Affair Fog is a bunch of BS far as I'm concerned. It's who they are 100%. Don't ever give them or yourself an excuse to minimise what is happening or happened.