We tried to stop the humans & Human's have trunks | Humans are space Orcs | HFY

We tried to stop the humans & Human's have trunks | Humans are space Orcs | HFY | TFOS1078

Рет қаралды 62,166

Күн бұрын

Original Story :
/ we_tried_to_stop_the_h...
/ humans_have_trunks
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{TimeStamps}
00:00 Intro
00:40 We tried to stop the humans by Original_Richgame
08:20 Human's have trunks by WenderToast
#Audiobook #Fiction #HumansAreSpaceOrcs
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This Story is Classified as HFY , but what does the Mean?
-------------
HFY is a story/series that takes a “human element” in either humanity or an “other” (race/species or object) that exists in a “setting” (future or other world/universe) with varying levels of culture, technology, society and history that help show in some shape or form the potential good or bad for humanity’s race/culture.
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Taken from the FAQ of the r/HFY subreddit.

Пікірлер: 193

@VelociraptorsOfSkyrim 2 жыл бұрын

"We tried to stop the humans." Well, there's your problem, you tried to stop humans. You can't stop humans until they've mated with or murdered their target.

@xxXXRAPXXxx 2 жыл бұрын

Or both.

@thenthson 2 жыл бұрын

@@xxXXRAPXXxx I hope that the mating comes first.

@morescodesup2087 2 жыл бұрын

Ya war boyz r weird, what’s the point of knife ears excepts testin your dakka?

@xxXXRAPXXxx 2 жыл бұрын

@@morescodesup2087 I've seen many doujins that have alternate uses for elfs.

@alexs5814 2 жыл бұрын

"Do, or not do. There is no try."

@H3xx99 2 жыл бұрын

If you're a pacifist and you're scared of a bunch of warlike apes, maybe you shouldn't shoot first and attempt to communicate second.

@UNSCPILOT 2 жыл бұрын

And deffinitly don't cage the human's whole solar system, it's just rude

@Chokah 2 жыл бұрын

@@UNSCPILOT yeah. That tends to make us angry at the people who built it.

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

Poor communication kills.They should've tried translating languages & sending letters.

@jeremyhire5516 2 жыл бұрын

To quote the late, great George Carlin "pacifism is a nice idea but it can get you killed"

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

@@jeremyhire5516 ACCURATE.

@royalroses123 2 жыл бұрын

Aliens: So, humans, can you tell me some of your specialties? Humans: Warfare? Aliens: ... Humans: I'll take that as a declaration of war.

@heartlessnobody1143 2 жыл бұрын

It do bem like that tho

@SoulariceJackson 2 жыл бұрын

on one hand i hope not. on the other it feels like a sad but likly answer. ademdem. FUCK NO!!!!! humans are fucked up. but we are not monsters. we are not now or ever again going to permit sutch a things. even in our worst. we know there are lines to tow. rules that must be played by. becuase we come from sutch a truely fucked place. we know we MUST BE BETTER!!!!!!!!!

@soyhugo390 2 жыл бұрын

@@SoulariceJackson Let me tell you what we learned here on the tird world by watching you the first world. "Its only a war crime if you loose, if you won then its just "forcing" a surrender"

@TimeSurfer206 2 жыл бұрын

They said they just wanted peace. And we took that personally.

@stain1095 2 жыл бұрын

Is there a reason. Should there be a reason.

@struppi441 2 жыл бұрын

If they studied their culture shouldnt they know a white flag stands for surrender?

@henrypaleveda7760 2 жыл бұрын

I mean that might have been a bit too "simple" for them but yeah, preferable to death for sure

@zyanidwarfare5634 2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, and if they understand our written language they could have transmitted written text rather than attempting to speak They just needed to write it in a human language

@Elmithian 2 жыл бұрын

@@zyanidwarfare5634 My assumption is that they merely tasted the surface level of our "culture" and due to their prejudice that we were just barbarians/savages didn't dig deeper. Otherwise they would have seen something more complicated than a species that just wants war. In short, they sucked at their job.

@zyanidwarfare5634 2 жыл бұрын

@@Elmithian yeah, they probably just skimmed over military and political history/culture and ignored the rest I can’t think of anything to compare it to but it’s like taking a pie out of the oven assuming it’s baked because of the outside when it’s still uncooked inside

@lairdcummings9092 2 жыл бұрын

"Study" does not require comprehension.

@carlfromtheoc1788 2 жыл бұрын

First tale - the first mistake was the belief we had been fighting each other for a mere 2,000 years. Fighting amongst ourselves and against others (like us and wild animals) goes back to when our ancestors still lived in trees. Poor aliens never had a chance. Second one reminds me of something my dad told me, from when he was stationed in Vietnam - a fellow officer had a sign on his desk that said, "Turn the tide with herbicides." Elves got hit with mustard gas, possibly defoliants too.

@mfree80286 2 жыл бұрын

Phosgene, followed by probably just CS or some other agent.

@zrebbesh 2 жыл бұрын

Sargon of Akkad, founder of the Akkadian empire, ruled from 2334-2154 BCE. Round it off to 4300 years ago. He was the first ruler to maintain a year-round standing army, as opposed to mobilizing fresh recruits for every war. So.... war has definitely been going on longer than that.

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

@@zrebbesh I only really know that name due to the youtuber.

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

They were a bit hipocritical.Their situation,right there,is the same reason WE have guns. But of course we are still portrayed as warmongerers aren't we? Hopefully grimdark stories like that will be fewer & far-between. Hope you & your dad are doing fine & all of that is behind you.

@vanevanhaagen4011 Жыл бұрын

As far as i know, there has been less than 100 Years, certainly less than 300 Years of planetwide Peace in our ENTIRE History.

@henrypaleveda7760 2 жыл бұрын

If the aliens had taken those thousands of years to study while preparing for war, they could have learned to use at least one of the languages used on earth, or how to make a language that we could translate. seems like a lot of these stories are caused by aliens being afraid of humans destroying the galaxy, and then giving them ample resson and material to do so.

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

Poor communication kills.

@alganhar1 2 жыл бұрын

No, they are caused by Authors trying to tell a story, not on anything that is based in true reality. You KNOW these are stories right? Not fact? Evolutionary Ecology is literally my career field.... Most 'HFY' authors have at best a... loose grip on Evolution.... The first story is worse than most in the genre....

@henrypaleveda7760 2 жыл бұрын

@@alganhar1 I understand that it is a fiction, I was referring to said fiction. excuse me for dedicating thought to it

@storkyfallout6516 2 жыл бұрын

When humans stole fire from the gods they were punished. Later humans used that fire and indignity to kill those same gods. When the gods where gone they turned their gaze upon themselves but never below. They were not gods.

@NPCNo-xm2li 2 жыл бұрын

Siege techs in the second story: "Man, I love the sight of some good yperite in the morning"

@milesohalloran8355 2 жыл бұрын

Look like elves get their first taste of chemical warfare

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

What sort of chemical is that?I didn't hear that one before... I was expecting napalm or white phosforous.

@ceu160193 Жыл бұрын

@@BrunoMaricFromZagreb Sounds like phosgene, based on smell. Only reason we mostly don't use it, is because all major militaries of the world have gas masks and other protective equipment.

@dementededge3266 2 жыл бұрын

At this point if I don't hear bobthedragon I'll probably have an existential crisis. Bob is single handedly paying for my entertainment and I love them for it.

@humanistwriting5477 2 жыл бұрын

Soon. Ah, soon. I'll make a sock from the nanites! Damn you nanaites! My other other sock *shall* be safe

@gman1515 2 жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm, For Krieg, and FOR MY OTHER SOCK!

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm , no comments about the sock :)

@blackpyro91 2 жыл бұрын

-happy gas mask noises-

@bernardrednix756 2 жыл бұрын

the "pacifist" alien really baffled me, if they are really that weak and cuddled how did they managed to survived let alone building space faring civilization without being competitive and aggressive? its painfully pathetic

@alexandercry5585 2 жыл бұрын

They were a war species turned pacifist... 01:21

@H3xx99 2 жыл бұрын

@@alexandercry5585 This^

@Chokah 2 жыл бұрын

@@alexandercry5585 So they went pacifist like Vulcans went Logical.

@bernardrednix756 2 жыл бұрын

being a pacifist doesn't necessarily mean making yourself defenseless otherwise you're asking to be extinct. the 'negative' traits like violence, greed and rage maybe ugly but without it our species would be extinct by now.

@H3xx99 2 жыл бұрын

@@bernardrednix756 you're confusing Nonviolence with Pacifism. Pacifism means not committing violence for any reason. Nonviolence means seeking peace in every event except self defense.

@greygalaxy8638 2 жыл бұрын

It was their own fault. The aliens shed first blood when their forcefield destroyed our early FTL ship. A ship that probably had innocent scientists aboard, remember that? What came next was karma.

@beave200 2 жыл бұрын

Foggers would have probably been more efficient for gassing. Use a scatter bomb to spread them all over and then just wait like you do with roaches or bed bugs.

@jameson1239 2 жыл бұрын

Use artillery to land it in the fort

@emmetcoyne6436 2 жыл бұрын

You know I wondered for the longest time what would happen to the knife-ears when humanity reached the industrial revolution. I like to think the war would look like that scene from the Wonder Woman movie, where the Amazon's are leaping around and shooting arrows, then the Germans open fire.

@kylemackinnon6230 2 жыл бұрын

Hanz, get the Chlorine

@GlueEater-ix9gl Жыл бұрын

and ze flamenwafer

@WE_DONT_LIE Жыл бұрын

@@GlueEater-ix9gl flammenwerfer

@GlueEater-ix9gl Жыл бұрын

@@WE_DONT_LIE Danke comarade, zese elves wont know what hit them

@WallNutBreaker524 Жыл бұрын

Pacifism leads to Paranoia and Overreaction when you're met with violence. 6:59 Humanity First 💪😎👌

@julietbutnotjuliet5919 2 жыл бұрын

finally i’ve made it to a premiere

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

@@AgroSquerril Ah,so it's finally been deleted while I was listening to chapter 154? And I was planning on listening to Chrysalis while binging your library from oldest to newest.Plus your numbered narration helped me keep track of which one I'm at. As they say,you don't know what you have until it's gone. Welp atleast your younger voice was pleasant to listen to,& I can still imagine it. Me and some of your subscribers were talking about how you should sign a contract for an official audiobook narration, since you're better than a text-to-speech robot & have a good work ethic.

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

Good job,I usually avoid them cause I prefer being able to pause & play back the video. But to each their own.

@Ghostly_One1 2 жыл бұрын

"They made the air dance for them" ...thats probably the most poetic way to describe talking I've ever seen

@Southern_Crusader 2 жыл бұрын

Why does it make me smile when we are referred to as the most self destructive species.

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

a weird type of pride

@discusmaximus 4 ай бұрын

For the Author(s), for the narrator Agro Squirrel, for the algorithm !!!

@redraven8963 Жыл бұрын

I swear to God the second story was taken straight out of Warhammer 40K

@MOTIVATED_SPARDA Жыл бұрын

Second story: When in doubt, use warcrimes

@mllhild 2 жыл бұрын

This all could have been prevented by finding some humanoid looking alien with large mammary glands and send her as diplomat for first contact.

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

lol

@BedlamsSon 2 жыл бұрын

I mean Elves are pricks in General but...What did they do to get humanity to break down to Chemical Warfare again? Or is it just to have parity with Psi power/ Magic?

@Fayanora Жыл бұрын

These are very bleak and sad, I kept hoping for the humans to be like "Okay, now that you know what we can do, let's hammer out a peace treaty." But it never came. :(

@steyn1775 2 жыл бұрын

Ah yes The 5th legg

@malcho1234 2 жыл бұрын

The second one is pure Osowiec, only the elves weren't as badass as the Russians were back then. What can you expect from a bunch of knife-eared treehuggers though...

@Elodin001 2 жыл бұрын

Just blast this over loudspeakers and make sure they understand this is part of our history, not just a horror story. kzfaq.info/get/bejne/Y6d2l9qg3rS4Ymg.html

@jipowap 2 жыл бұрын

Glassing planets full of civilians after thier fleet is neutralized. Not likely.

@soyhugo390 2 жыл бұрын

Hiroshima y Nagasaky go boom

@TrueFork 2 жыл бұрын

pacifist planets even. A bit heavy on the war crimes in these stories

@borgdroneof 2 жыл бұрын

@@TrueFork its not warcrimes its denying the enemy potential recruits and also the aliens never signed the geneeva conviction

@widdershins5383 2 жыл бұрын

@@TrueFork a pacified enemy is still an enemy.

@Battleguild 2 жыл бұрын

Must've been Double XP for committing War Crimes that week.

@jamescooper2825 2 жыл бұрын

That was a dark couple

@m.t.fguard8309 Жыл бұрын

I feel like the second story is a follow-up to the one where everyone thousand years the elves would come from their world to kill a couple million people then take their souls / energy and shove it into one of their trees to make them live forever but in the last time they came they delt with a bunch of wwII/ Vietnam area American soldier's that pretty much gave them the "fuck yo shields and eat some led" treatment

@eleethtahgra7182 2 жыл бұрын

1st story; those who turn their sword into plowshare..... 2nd story; krieg happy gas mask noise.

@TrashedRedPanda 11 ай бұрын

I actually just watched Luetins overview on the Krieg of 40k lol.

@daemonxblaze 2 жыл бұрын

Nothing says 'human' quite like war crimes

@gorasul12 4 ай бұрын

Its easy to forget that the highest tech, best equipment and most troops means little without the will to use them.

@tylernelson2218 2 жыл бұрын

As a prior CBRN specialist I don't know how I feel about this last story

@McSkumm 2 жыл бұрын

They were just elves, so it wasn't a warcrime.

@WE_DONT_LIE Жыл бұрын

@@McSkumm true their screams were lovely

@JoaoSoares-rs6ec Жыл бұрын

one correction to the tale humanity has had at least 4000 years of organised warfare, actualy more close to 5000 years as humanity has had organised warfare from almost the beggining of the first cities.

@Alleykat0166 2 жыл бұрын

Another Comment to show my appreciation , FOR THE ALGORITHM!!

@nos2342 2 жыл бұрын

To please the algorithm is all

@Alleykat0166 2 жыл бұрын

@@nos2342 What is With your name and What Emoji is that??

@nos2342 2 жыл бұрын

@@Alleykat0166 I support the channel on KZfaq. There are some perks.

@Alleykat0166 2 жыл бұрын

@@nos2342 How do you support it???

@nos2342 2 жыл бұрын

@@Alleykat0166 I'm a channel member. Look for the join button.

@The_Viscount Жыл бұрын

2nd story Krieg Soldiers: *happy gasmask noises*

@theonetodefyall238 2 жыл бұрын

keeper going

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

kept going

@ChappyGrimdark 2 жыл бұрын

*happy gas mask sounds*

@SiegeTF 2 жыл бұрын

I thought the second story would be about reproduction. I may have been wrong, but those Elves got screwed just the same!

@thetrap1880 Жыл бұрын

By the Traveler!

@Eramiserasmus 2 жыл бұрын

Algorithm, defeat the nanites! But a great episode.

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm , glad you enjoyed

@BrunoMaricFromZagreb 2 жыл бұрын

Poor communication kills. Ah,so IT has finally been deleted while I was listening to chapter 154? And I was planning on listening to Chrysalis while binging your library from oldest to newest.Plus your numbered narration helped me keep track of which one I'm at. As they say,you don't know what you have until it's gone. Welp atleast your younger voice was pleasant to listen to,& I can still imagine it. Me and some of your subscribers were talking about how you should sign a contract for an official audiobook narration, since you're better than a text-to-speech robot & have a good work ethic.

@DEMONOFLOVEANDDEATH 2 жыл бұрын

Bless the Squerril Bless the Author

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@allenmorgan1007 2 жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm, For the Author(s), For the Disembodied Voice!

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@scullcrusher3981 2 жыл бұрын

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

hey there

@macpurdy 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm and the narrator.

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@waynejackman6337 2 жыл бұрын

I only started watching your channel in early July and I'm already done with all 1078 tfos

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

nice

@freedomfighter2054 2 жыл бұрын

Haha gas warfare goes brrrr

@nicktheloser2974 2 жыл бұрын

Comment for the algorithm

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@widdershins5383 2 жыл бұрын

For KRIEG!!! For the Imperium!!

@elfeater1760 2 жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm11!

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm11!

@overfailed3639 2 жыл бұрын

Let's go commit warcrimes! Yahoo!

@widdershins5383 2 жыл бұрын

At some point after we become spacefaring society, I assume we will at some point be the progenitors of a genocide. What if the species doesn’t understand surrender or defeat? What if they’re willing to fight and die to the last entity because they’re genetically bred or created to be that way? 🤷🏼‍♂️ genocide is and always will be a factor of life. It’s just the galaxy’s hygiene.

@kurtismiller9544 2 жыл бұрын

Utter FAILURE! Trying to stop the Hoooomaan!

@IronWarrior_69 2 жыл бұрын

Bing bang boom Algorithm

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the Algorithm11!

@gman1515 2 жыл бұрын

Oh hey neat I'm pretty sure I spotted you in that second story

@Monster_Ink 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm!

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@papasult11 2 жыл бұрын

I missed the premiere!!! NO!!!!!!

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

better late than never

@genericuser984 2 жыл бұрын

neat

@bulldowozer5858 2 жыл бұрын

0:57 FAKE! Everyone knows Lars is a small Polar bear!

@whatsagoodusername823 2 жыл бұрын

Usa alang sa algorithm

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@Dmansvids2 2 жыл бұрын

that last one was just depressing T-T

@borgdroneof 2 жыл бұрын

i feel the same the humans should have used more gas

@calebfielding6352 Жыл бұрын

if they studied humans they should just ally themselves with one of the dozens of nations, and let them fight it out.

@jakemallory4239 Жыл бұрын

these were more f... humans, than hfy imo.

@bathroomprophet2310 2 жыл бұрын

For the algorithm

@unit_cxviiiserial_mmlxxix7959 2 жыл бұрын

It is I, a brick.

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

tactical assualt brick?

@unit_cxviiiserial_mmlxxix7959 2 жыл бұрын

@@AgroSquerril If needs be, I'm pretty sneaky, for a brick

@FedralBI 2 жыл бұрын

For the extermination of the Elves!

@smaragdwolf1 Жыл бұрын

meh... the humans in story 2 should atleast capture the elves. If its already a dying Species, they arent much of a Threat anymore. Sure, they would most likely being treated poorly, but there would have been a chance to release them later, when more peaceful Humans are in charge. If they had chemical Weapons, they could have make sleeping gas too.

@Staladus 2 жыл бұрын

Seems like the aliens in the 1st story were at fault

@xxXXRAPXXxx 2 жыл бұрын

Well it is a fictional story and people often cannot comprehend the scale of a galactic empire/union. Why not leave some aliens to study humans? Even if 0.0001% of the population would be willing to waste their time being fascinated by humans it would still be millions or even billions of them. Or use basic AI to gather knowledge and later have them translate what you want to say. In truth there is no way aliens could not communicate or overwhelm humans (even if you are pacifist you should value defense so some kind of energy shields that humans could not reproduce [because seriously just by probes we ware able to reverse engineer their whole ships? Even their generators? Can you do that? Just looking at a car and recreating its engine from scratch in your own home without using any other knowledge source?). So yea even if we would break out of the barrier peace talks would be in place (because they would not be as terrified as in the story because some of them would stay and study humans).

@cbl1199 2 жыл бұрын

''this intern'' rather than ''This, in turn'' typo trigger me to an unreasonable extent.

@karenreaves3650 2 жыл бұрын

Hey

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

hey there

@mr.pineapple7620 2 жыл бұрын

Tbh those fuckin xenos where asking for it.

@josmeijers2818 2 жыл бұрын

F.T.A !

@Bonesaw4444 2 жыл бұрын

Ok the second story is nicely uniqe

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

@merlinwizard1000 Жыл бұрын

182nd, 15 January 2023

@VadulTharys 2 жыл бұрын

F T A

@AgroSquerril 2 жыл бұрын

for the algorithm

@Kikilang60 2 жыл бұрын

These stories are like consuming alcohol. A little is okay, but to much, and don't want to drink for a while. A week or two, and you start to over drink, and you sick again. So, the first story is about a paradice destroyied. The second story is about a desperate people trying to avoid genocide. The should at least pretend that the people they murder are bad. These last to stories sound like a man bragging about beating up a six year. "Yeah, that little bastard didn't know what hit him. Stupid punk crying for his mommy. I killed his mommy." How depraved do you have to be, when these stories are just about peaceful people being murdered.

@kriegsmanjaeger5545 2 жыл бұрын

Well I mean in the first story the aliens drew first blood with their barrier. Was it an unfortunate accident yes but the fault is still on the alien because they saw humanity undoubtedly at their worst and decided that they were hopeless. Now because of their actions, their pacifist ideals came back to bite them in the ass.

@Deadhessian 2 жыл бұрын

both stories somehow very sad and dark......*sigh* usually, theres either aliens too evil so humans have right to let loose the hounds of war or they notice the aliens aint that bad and stop at some point but in those 2 stories, theres no such thing, just evil humans doing evil things.....