I love how the end of each update is, "If my family stops giving me ammunition, the posts will stop". Followed by, "UPDATE"

I actually feel bad for the Father and the brother in law. An old man and a man with a career have to babysit their wives while they throw tantrums about not being able to bully the youngest of the family anymore.

Oh no! She has to take care of the children she gave birth too 🙄

The last update is quite the serotonin boost, its so good of a feeling for sister and mom to know they're being aired out on the internet 🎂

I heard this whole saga. That's what happens when you keep taking someone for granted.

I know how OP feels. I stopped going on road trips and camping trips because I was the one who was expected to unload vehicles and set things up while everyone else sat on their asses, in addition to getting things for people because they didn't feel like getting it themselves. And anytime I tell them to get it themselves, they say I'm being selfish. Then the same people asked me why I don't go anymore.

My heart honestly dropped a little to hear that the sister was upset to no longer be an only child. She could have been the cool older sister but she held on to a resentment of her brother just existing? That’s cold hearted. I can’t imagine how my life would be if my siblings were like this. The parents really spoiled her.

Update 4 is just OP telling his mother and sister to stop or he's gonna tell Reddit

Heard the entire story, the sister seriously has a screw loose to legitimately believe her brother is supposed to be her servant. Like I really hope she isn't damaging her kids with her lunacy.

Ya know if she had just approached with some degree of compromise none of this would have happened. Entitlement and greed killed his kindness.

One of the benefits of being a blunt person is that I don't get asked to do stuff like this. Also, it's wild that people don't understand that "keeping the peace" is also a toxic mindset too because it minimises while continuing to damage.

only the smart one was the brother in law who said nope in the beginning , didn't age well

Kindness without gratitude is depleted.

I wonder if they know this story is on KZfaq now. But that's nice it ended well and the sister has finally come to recognize her major problem and is getting help for it, that's the first step to personal growth and maturity. The parents sound like extreme pushovers given how much they were enabling the sister, but in the end they realized their wrong and and began making it right. And I just have to say one thing. The sister complaining that she has to wrangle her triplets and is tired and needs a break as if her OWN children are someone else's responsibility was hilarious. Kids are only the responsibility of their parents. Get someone who's willing to babysit and PAY them, or don't have kids if you plan on being a piece of garbage and try to force your siblings (or in some cases, older children) to babysit for free.

Posts like these make me appreciate my own sister even more. She is also a mother of 2 & handles most of the things in their home, juggles everything with her job too but never pushes these 2 on someone else for along period of time. I see them every friday when they are coming over & me + my parents play with them for a few hours at that time. Every couple of months we watch them for like 1-2 days over the weekend when they don't find someone else & just want a little time for themselves. We always happily take them. I understand that it is hard to be a mother of 3 kids but ffs that was your own goddamn choice & decision to become a mother & you should realize that you can't have the same lifestyle as before if you get kids.

Op, "Hey, stop loading the gun, and I'll stop firing." Sister *casually adds more bullets*

I get not being prepared for three kids at the same time, but you had the kids, and it’s your responsibility to take care of them. Besides, the over excited stage doesn’t last forever with children

Serves the sister and parents right.

Being a mum of three is hard BUT they could easily afford a babysitter, nanny etc so let this poor guy alone ! His life is a s precious as everybody’s lives are . Not everything is about kids . (And yes, I’m a mum, too).

Mom : You're Right(Crying) OP : Yeah as a matter of fact I am right!

She chose to have kids

There is a real reason why so many parents don't go on far away holidays when the children are still under 12. It's more hassle than it's worth it. Also this story just tells me not everyone is fit to breed.

I am so happy for the guy family I really respect that for them. Like yeah he has is own job and house car too and money why did he need to take the kid

I can't understand why they would insist that the post is taken down. Reddit is anonymous? No one outside the family knows who they are. The only reason I can think is that they wanted OP to forget about any good advice, or be able to distort the facts, later.

I feel bad for the OP. A crazy sister and enabling mother (and father to a lesser extent) isn't easy But i gotta admit i _also_ feel bad for the brother-in-law. Sure, he didn't step in sooner, but that seems to be because the sister lied to him. Now that he knows the problem he's actively trying to prevent things from escalating. So props to him, but also big yikes for him as well. Can't imagine it's nice having to basically be a warden or whatever to your own crazy wife because she just can't leave well enough alone 😕

My husband and I are expecting our third child and we still don’t expect anyone to watch our kids whenever we want. We even took a week long road trip with a 4yo and 6mo earlier this year. Guess what? We were able to take care of it all ourselves. Did we get tired? Yes. But these kids are our world and I wanted that vacation with them and it made my husband and I beyond happy to share all that we experienced with them. You wanted the kids, they’re YOUR responsibility. No one else’s.

Ive heard this story before but only up till after the family vacation. Its nice to know there's more to the story!!! I'm glad OP is doing alright for himself!

As an older sibling myself with two sisters, 1 who is 22 and the youngest being 12. I will admit that i feel exasperated and annoyed with my sisters and more than once have thought of the days when l wished I was an only child. Both due to gender and the large age gap( Im 27) I think its something every first born child has thought about at least once in their lifes. But they are my blood and bond and I love them in equal measure with my whole heart and to me, Being the oldest means set an example for them to follow and to also help protect and nurture our younger siblings. And if i make them do stuff for me, I in return wil support them and assist why they ask things off me. They are my siblings. Not my slaves. Theres a diffrence. One day the OP sister finally sees this.

Family:" Can you...?" Bro: " No" What a chad...

It’s her kids it her responsibility, she can’t just poop out triplets and expect OP to take care of them.😂

I was the braai master of my family and friends for over 20 years. A braai is a barbecue for you uninitiated. I never braaied on gas cookers, as here in South Africa, we preferred the taste of our meat cooked over hot coals. Yeah, aromatic wood and charcoal for the best flavours ever meant more work at the same time. I was around 16 years old when I became the goto braai man in the family, and I loved it. Then my friends found out, and I ended up braaiing everywhere we went. We used to eat a lot of meat in South Africa then, so I was standing over hot coals at least twice a week. The cook is the center of attention normally, so it's not a lonesome job, so long as there is cold beer to hand. After 20 years of this, I tried to get the neices and nephews involved, but they weren't interested. As I got older, the hot African summer heat and open fire got me so exhausted that I would cook, having had a beer or two and cold plain water on the way, then I would retire, without eating, to sleep. I had had back problems all my life that got worse year by year. I had started using a walking stick in my 40s already. It became a chore to braai. One day, I was told to start the fire... at my uncles house, and I flatly refused. I told them I was done with standing over the heat and my back was giving me trouble that week. They ALL knew how to braai, so I left them to it. Enough was enough. I would braai at home as I was the host, but I wouldn't be the fall guy and braai everyones meat at someone elses home. There is a personal pride every South African feels when braaiing, and naturally, every male and a few females bragged about their braai skills. Who was I to stand in their way? Let them stand by their words. The thing about braaiing or barbecuing is that people will try to tell you how to do your work. It gets tiring after a while. I'm in my mid-50s now and haven't been to a braai in over a year. And I miss it. Most of my family have passed away, as have some friends, or they have emigrated away, and I stopped drinking, so I don't mix with the family that keep trying to get me to drink again. Pain medication and alcohol don't mix!

If you take care of her kids ask for child support period

It’s a good thing that your mom is there to help your sister with her kids if she needs so much help with them. Hell even her husband can, oh I don’t know, help with his kids. Or hey here’s an idea, why didn’t they HIRE a babysitter to come to on the vacay to help with the kids like everyone else has to do if they want adult/grown people time away from kids?! This sister is beyond entitled.

Alt. Title: Sister doesn't want to be a Housewife.

What I think is sad is that the only reason anyone sided with OP was the massive public backlash. If OP raised this with them in private the best he would get would be some support from the brother in law, but I mean, the BIL is smarter than to just needlessly jump into the middle of drama so I doubt he'd raise a ruckus.

This applies to golden geese in companies and how dumb upper management is for letting them go and wonder why 40% of their workforce gets disorganized the very next day.

Can we talk about how BIL is being a Chad, and he's the only one with a level head that isn't op. And the sister has to have a couple of screws loose for expecting her bro to do everything. And I'm happy op is to start to live.🎉

I fear this being my future, I have an elder sister with two sons, I am single, and plan to NEVER be in a relationship, I have dreams of being an author, but she has gaslighted and threated to take her kids away if we ever turn down babysitting

A good ending? Where the family stays in contact with each other? And the guilty parties apologize for their wrongdoings and get help for their personal issues? I'm shocked, honestly. This is almost completely unheard of.

I am incredibly lucky to have the sister that i do. She's way more understanding of my limits and boundaries. That being said, i do love taking part in helping with my niece so i guess she understands that my limits arent there because of any resentment, just my own issues. Makes communicating a lot easier when your sibling doesnt resent you for your existence.

If you can't handle kids 24/7 don't get kids to begin with.

“I’m sick of the whole ‘keep the peace’ mentality that sacrifices me to placate my sister” is an excellent description of how these mentalities are so messed up. Saying you want to keep the peace is just saying you want a victim to suffer in silence because you don’t want to deal with it.

Sister can hire a nanny like most sane ppl would who feel overwhelmed.

Sister = Karen

OP handled things pretty well. Normally, this isn't the sort of thing I would bring to Reddit, as the commentors there can be fairly harsh and single-minded. But it did get his point across that this was an objective problem and not simply a case of him dramatizing the situation. It helps him to be taken seriously, and he may not have been without all those other people expressing their support. Not my preferred method of resolution, but I can't argue with the results. The parents... not too bad. I don't see them as malicious or manipulative, just maybe a bit inconsiderate or oblivious, and clearly wanting the drama to stop and for things to get back to normal. From OP's perspective, they might look bad, but their daughter is also their access to the grandsons, there's another whole dynamic there that exists outside the scope of the story which they are trying to negotiate. Their response wasn't perfect, but I won't be too harsh on them. OP is a grown man, his Sister is a grown woman, they should be able to resolve this themselves. The parents are only involved because they planned the trip and because their daughter comes crying to them. OP didn't really try to involve them beyond informing them of his decision. They were caught in the crossfire a bit. It surely could have been handled better, but there's another side there which we aren't seeing, so I reserve judgement. Brother-in-law... Sounds like a great guy to be honest. Another one caught in the crossfire. But he took accountability after listening to both sides, and just handled it well. I imagine it's not a situation he wants to be caught up in but he handled what parts of it he could very reasonably. The Kids... They're kids. They likely don't understand half of what's happening here, and what they do understand is less important to them than that Pokemon they're trying to catch at the beach, lol. No blame there. The sister... I'm glad she's in therapy. "Being a mom is sooo hard", yeah, no shit. That's still a choice she made, she willfully assumed that responsibility, and there are literally billions of other moms out there who can manage the stress. Nobody says it's easy, but it is possible and most mothers figure it out, so the whole mommy-martyrdom thing rings a bit hollow. She has a spouse with a decent income and parents to help her, she's a stay-at-home mom so she has an abundance of time to meet her obligations without also balancing a career on top of parenting. She's been delt a much easier hand than many mothers. And OP IS willing to help her. He was babysitting for free with no expectation of pay (he didn't even realize she was stiffing him on that, lol), and he kept agreeing. He just laid down some ground rules so she couldn't take advantage of that. He's not saying "Your kids, your problem, Piss off", he's just saying that his help is contingent on her respecting his time and resources and being treated fairly as an equal member of the family and not a servant. That's not unreasonable. It sounds like the sister is fixating on this issue as a cover for some other problems. I'm getting the classic "Damsel in Distress" vibes off her behavior. The type of person who finds validation and their sense of self-worth in how much others are willing to help them and empathize or sympathize with them. When you tell a person like that you won't help them, they take it as a personal attack. As personality defects go, that's a pretty easy one to address, and a therapist will likely be able to help a lot. Her behavior was very bad, but I don't think she's bad, she's just struggling with some things about herself and her brother standing up for himself became a trigger for her. I have high hopes that she comes out of this much better off in the long run. Overall, I think this has a happy ending for everyone. Perhaps not the happy ending each would have preferred, but I think it ultimately leaves them all in a better place.

broo, the vacation update, why tf are you still going with them? just go by yourself... you can't even relax being on high alert edit: also, why does the family care? not like you dox them by first and last name

I love how the brother in law just said NAH to the entire argue 😂

"the reddit post got me a gf." OK, now we know it is fake

Stay at home mothers need to understand that they aren't entitled to "a break". They chose this life. They chose to have kids. Woman up indeed...

It's amazing how people get so pissed when they get called out on their crap

Nice bonus at the end new gf knows about the crazy family and still wants to give it a shot even waited for him to bring it up good for op all my best wishes

This is just a vicious cycle. I don't understand why he even went on the family vacation. It's not hard to take a trip alone somewhere else and avoid the drama.

Why isn’t nobody talking about how his nephews are literally SISTERS KIDS?!? Yeah you have to look after them if you didn’t want them go put them in adoption to find a better mom or dad. Literally she is the laziest mom i ever heard because my sister has a little girl and she has never forced me to babysit the child every time in my freetime. Its so annoying when i hear this adult child having a tantrum

His sister is cray cray...its not his responsobility ffs to take care of her kids, the stupidity of some people is truly remarkable.

That last part made me pretty happy hearing that he and the girl he liked are going on a date. I hope it goes well for them!

I was an only child until I was 14 1/2 and I adored my little brother. I think a big reason why it was different for me is because I was a very lonely child and it finally gave me a best friend.

3:00 Holy shit? Parents came to their senses? That’s wild. Also sister is a brat. Your kids… the audacity to feel entitled to help is wild.

“If the glass slipper fits…” had me laughing like crazy! Good one, OP!! 😂😂😂

This is how my sister is. She wants to claim shes a good mom but her kids are usually watched by my dad. I refuse to watch my nieces unless I am paid. Even though we all live together. I'm not a free babysitter

This was absolutely ONE of the BEST stories I've READ!!! ❤❤❤ 😊😊😊

I find it so funny how people go on about how hard it is to be a parent. How about you keep your legs closed then if you don't want those kinds of responsibilities?

I hate assuming random stories are fake, but damn that last update just realllly sounds like another "and then everybody clapped" moment, and really reminds me that the whole series of posts and updates sounded like an average redditor writing a fanfic about the power they wish posting to reddit would give them, rather than an actual story. Idk, maybe it's really, I try to not live just doubting everything for no reason, but this one is really out there for me.

It’s funny how the sister is tired of being a parent since if she had kept her legs closed than she wouldn’t be crying to mommy and daddy about wanting to break

Trust me she’s not getting the counseling she’s getting the different type

If it's so hard to be a parent of triplets, i kinda wonder why be a parent at all of you're not even gonna parent and make someone else do the parenting

Well, closed circle family gaslighting doesn't work anymore if you can operate the internet. They tried to shame him and he found a bigger circle (platform) that shamed the women in return. That's the part of the internet I love.

I wonder how bil is in person. He seems to be very calm and collected at all times. I mean difficult to judge because he only makes short appearances in the posts. I feel like he being the biggest person in this story. Ofc ojs is in the right and he's the main character of his story. I just wanted to give credit where its due: dealing with 3 kids a wife with questionable agency at best and this whole drama. It wouldn't be a wild guess for them to separate, jet it seemed to work out at the end. I hope for the kids that everything works out with their parents

_"But they are your nephews!!!"_ *"They are **_YOUR_** children!!*

The whole situation could have been avoided by the Sister just hiring a damned babysitter on vacation. Does she not realize that families do that?

Tje actual entitlement. I am 35 woth 2 girls, one on the way due next week. I would never ask anyone else to sacrifice their vacay because I chose to pop out kids. Especially the dang child free younger family members. The child free younger ones NEED those fun vacations to make memories and have so much fun. MY kids need mom and dad to make memories WITH them

My man got his freedom back and a GF on top of that!! Keep winning OP :) I'm rooting for you. "Well, if the glass slipper fits" Classy xD

If you can handel your kid,then dont have kids?!

I kind of had a similar thing happen to me. Not the whole perpetual babysitter thing, but on the last big family gathering, I was entertaining my cousins kids, two his own and one his brothers. I didn't even realize I had basically been the free babysitter until everyone left an I realized I didn't get to talk with any of my relatives. It still kind of stings, thinking my family just used that fact I enjoy playing with and entertaining kids to have family togetherness that I wasn't included in.

Standing up for yourself is hard, but in the end, it is satisfying, when you finally get the long awaited release that you so dearly needed for such a long time

I'll give props to the Father and BOL for both becoming responsiple and better people in this situation, you shouldnt be forcing the resposibility of your own kids onto someone else who doesnt have or is even supposed to have that resposibility in the first place, it is both unfair and can build up resentment overtime, even on vacations you have to be resposible for your kids, Parenthood is a Job without Breaks or Vacations that you don't get paid for, even if its accidental, you have to do the responsible thing thats best for your kids, not yourself, unless its a situation where quite litelarly cannot handle having kids, like being unable to maintil a stable life.

Looks like the Sister is the golden child

If this doesn't prove that the pen is mightier than the sword, I don't know what will. Wtg OP and Reddit, for bringing down another narcissist and enabling parents. Well played.

The fact that she even tried to find op's room to yet again try to force op to babysit says she STILL refuses to learn and I bet it was hilarious when her husband tore into her for trying to make op babysit yet again. Color me shocked that she agreed to counseling. But why am I not surprised that she had long time resentment towards op for her not being the only child. Glad she finally realizes that she's in the wrong and will get help. Hopefully it'll stick and she'll be a better person to poor op.

SIL has herself, her husband, both of your parents, her parents, aunts and uncles. It's a FAMILY vacation, but they're treating OP like the only thing he's there to be a nanny to her kids. He wants to pay for his own room and drive his own car. That should not be an issue and it's only an issue because SIL doesn't want to play mother to her own children.

Instead of inviting the son for "free vacation", the family could have just spent that money on a babysitter. You chose to have children, which means that they are your responsibility. OP's sister really looks like she hates her kids.

Helping them out is a privilege for them, not a right. She wanted to have kids? Perhaps she should’ve expected to *take care of the kids* until they’re grown up, you know.. being a parent? OP was doing it for free. Honestly, you should do these things for your family members perhaps even your closest friends, however, when they treat you like a free babysitter or a ‘tool’ then it becomes a problem..

SHE got the kids, they are hers not your. They are using you as a free babysitter. Thats a BIG NO

My sister was like this during my 7th-9th grade. I was so happy when she moved out with her husband!

As someone who works in a hotel, OP's sister has extreme dedication or just got lucky to find out his room

Dear Op, I’m happy that you were able to get a satisfactory conclusion to your drama.

New book makes best seller list- “How To Be Nice To Your Younger Brother For Dummies “

... All the family has to do is stop causing drama... And they just continue causing drama!

I love how at the start his brother-in-law was just like 'Nope I ain't dealing with this shit'😂

Damn, what a way to end it. Dudes got together with someone and is happy to boot.

Those are your kids you should have known that kids are a continuous job. There're no breaks! You shouldn't have had kids if you weren't willing to take on this responsibility!!!

I love that each update ends with "If my family stops giving me ammunition, the posts will stop". The "UPDATE" follows.

This used to happen at my family's gatherings. SIL would bring her 3 kids and proceed to not take care of them. They were all playing outside and my nephew came in to tell her one of her kids got hurt. She asked "Well who was watching them?' He said I don't know, I ain't their mother. My brother was off golfing and she had previously said well, someone was going to watch her kids. I told her that was between she and my brother, it was not our job. Got glares. They were very irresponsible parents.

OP is based af for handling things this way. If you happen to see this, good job soldier

I can never understand how people have kids and try to force people who don't have kids to raise them. While they 'get a break' as if people without kids want all that drama all the time.

If they can afford vacations every few months they can afford a nanny

The brother in law saying "nope" is litterally so me

On vacation, the sister is a terrible mother! She should watch her own kids, instead of making her younger sibling babysit!

I love it when good OP's get a happy end!!!

This whole fiasco because the sister does not understand the full responsibilities of a parent. You do not get time off as a parent, especially if you have young children. If you want to alleviate your “job” by hiring a babysitter or occasionally getting a sibling/parent to look after your children, that’s fine, but readily pushing your responsibilities onto someone else for a chance at any free time isn’t. If you are not ready to sacrifice not just your time, but plenty of other quantifiable assets that are needed when raising children, then you are not ready to be a parent. Yes, I understand that raising children isn’t easy, and it’s understandable to want to catch a break, so I am not judging anyone for feeling that way, but exploiting others in order to get free time disgraceful. If you are planning to have children, not having the forethought that there will be moments when you will have to sacrifice your free time to take care of them is outright foolish. And even if you are aware that it will happen, mentally preparing yourself for it to happen as commonly as possible is wise to do, even if it doesn’t end up happening. But that might just be me personally, though it wouldn’t be unwise for more people to prepare this way.

I love this story should of ended at minute 3 but just kept going 🙌🏾