I am officially on Popcall where you can give me a ring to chat one-on-one! ☎ popcall.com/keven

Anyone who isn't legally blind and would still walk away from you is obviously insane.

I'm sorry that this happened to you, but I'm glad that you finally concluded that the problem was with him and not yourself.

I really think it was his own insecurities and shame/ trauma/inner guilt. Either it’s his first gay time or he was cheating and had a girlfriend/wife. And something weird about him.

I'd honestly like to see what THIS guy looked like! I mean, you're a handsome guy Keven. You have beautiful eyes and are a truly good-looking man! There is NOTHING wrong with you! You can be SURE of this sir!

That guy was definitely insane to walk away from a guy like you!!!!!

I think he either wasn't out or was in a relationship and decided not to cheat at the last minute.

Don't take it personally, Grindr boys are difficult to deal with, nothing you can do about it. Some are damaged beyond repair and it shows straight away. I always trust my intuition and I'm usually right. Don't feel hurt or guilty. Try singing it off, they may fall in love with your voice.

I could’ve literally made this exact same video myself. This EXACT same thing had happened to me before. Met up with guy on Grindr for hookup. And the moment we came face to face he takes a look at me and immediately says “this isn’t gonna work” and then walks away awkwardly. It destroyed my confidence. I still think about it today. But then I realize there were plenty of guys that didn’t react that way to me. And I just accept that I will never be everyone’s cup of tea. But I have the same problem as you like after a job interview or something if I end up not being hired I immediately start asking “what did I do wrong??” “Do I smell bad or look weird?” So no you’re not alone I experienced this same thing as well and felt terrible afterwards

I had two WTF just happen experiences. The first one, I met a nice guy at a bar and we talked for about 2 hours and was even touchy-feelly at one point. We really seemed to click and I was thinking we would leave and hookup that night. About 11 pm, he said he enjoyed our conversation but needed to go home and get some sleep since he had to get up at 6 am and be ready for work. Didn't even offer to exchange numbers, just said "maybe we'll see other again some time". Never seen him again at that bar. Second time was similar, chatted online for almost 2 hours than he said he needed to go to bed. Next day he ghosted me. Oh well.

I do this all the time. It comes from shame. We are so ashamed of ourselves that everything bad that happens is because of us or our bad behavior. Its never just a shity situation.

It's called INSECURITY, but its played out under the masquerade of flaking (which is passive aggressive power control posturing), ghosting ("I can get something better" (but they usually don't), acting as if you don't meet their standards (when the real fear is that THEY don't meet YOUR standards), and the most common form of rejection, which is simple anxiety-induced "cold feet". Remember that people who have poor self-esteem will try to hide their weakness in any number of ways, all of which involve rejecting you BEFORE you reject them. I've been the one rejected or flaked out on, and I've also been the one doing the cancelling/rejecting (I'm ill, I'm busy, my "schedule" bla bla bla, mostly fabricated white lies). It's all about that annoying voice in one's head that says, "I'm not attractive enough for this person, I don't make enough money for this person, My body is not hot enough, I'm too fat, my penis is not big enough, I'm a social geek", etc etc. And don't forget another reason for the insta-rejection: I am on drugs and this guy looks like he's not. (Yes, honey, there IS a "drug look" and we all know it but we don't want to be "judgy" even when we should listen to our gut instincts). It's rarely about you so the best reaction is INDIFFERENCE. Just move on to someone who has healthy self-esteem, is not a walking red flag, is not unstable, and isn't wasted on alcohol or some drug meant to curb his insecurity and anxiety.

... he opened the door, took one look and said "no" and shut it ... honestly haven't been on a date since, and that was probably 15 years ago , I have no self-esteem to speak of anymore , haven't been to a bar in years

This happened to me years ago when I was about 24 and lived in San Diego, California. I went to this guys house after talking on a site called 'hot or not' in which people would rate your attractiveness from 1 to 10 on your profile, this was way before grindr. People rated me an 8.9 so I was on the cusp of being a '9'.... this guy specifically stated on his profile that he only hooked up with 9s or higher. I thought he was hot and lived near me, in that time I lived in Del Mar which is kind of far from the gay are in San Diego. So I went to his house and when he opened the door he immediately said "nah" and closed the door on my face. Then he opened it again and said "I dont know how people rate you even an 8, you're not even close to a 5". I felt terrible because I was so young. Yes the picture I took was with really good lighting but there were no filters back then or anything like that and I was pretty skinny so certain light can make you look more muscular so I looked a little more 'meaty' on the picture. I couldn't sleep the whole night feeling horrible about how I looked and deleted my profile there. This guy was in his 40s so I would expect him to be a little bit more empathetic with a younglin like I was at the time but he was harsh. I called one of my best friends and told her and she told me that he was crazy that I was handsome and this and that so I felt better. It helps to have support of friends when things like these happen.

Smmhh... this is why I no longer agree to meet people for in person pseudo dates just to hookup. I get the feeling some dudes would really like to date but aren't aware of that desire or are afraid to say it. So they make it so that you can meet up with them in person and evaluate you in-person usually via conversation or just a chance to look you over. However considering the vast distances some these people live... that's what the pictures on the app profile are for... why should I waste my gas just to drive 20 miles in order for you tell me no (or even back out). Complete waste of my time and yours. Time is money especially with today's gas prices and I don't have time for this bull****...🙄

I wonder if he felt you were out of his league.

If the only thing anyone can change is themselves then it’s good to have a policy of self examination. Thanks for mentioning the people that derive some type of weird fuel from rejection, or put themselves on a dating app and don’t want to date. It’s easy to see that you are the guy in the video, so it’s on him.

May be the guy is just intimated by you when he saw you in person.

Wishing you a Happy Summer Gorgeous!😘

Well, rejection is difficult. Everyone has different reasons for changing their minds. It isn't always about you.

As Miranda would say, "He's just not that into you." It seems he has a very narrow and specific attraction and the reality, for whatever reason, didn't match that. His loss. Or as a trainer once told me, "That sounds like a YP, not an MP." I'd adopt that attitude toward him. It's his problem, not your problem.

Its happened to us all. Dont read into it and consider it his loss. 🤷‍♂️

Wouldn't worry,don't spend your youth being insecure about your looks. First off, you're very handsome, secondly in 40 years you will see pictures of yourself now and realize how hot you were.

⭐⭐⭐⭐ "ONE DAY SOMEONE WILL WALK INTO YOUR LIFE AND GET IT RIGHT, WHERE EVERYONE ELSE GOT IT WRONG"

Dating app?! 😂 you mean hookup app 😂

We like what we like, it doesn't have to be logical

Stay off the dating apps. You are too classy to put yourself in those positions. You are a very handsome man but go for the inner self…which you will rarely find on Grinder. Be blessed

You literally fit description of Prince Charming.. is he blind? What kind of out of touch expectations he have.. 🤦😂? I literally watched your first video because of your charm and hotness, then I really liked your thoughts... 😊

Try not to fret.

Keven, it was not you. I know we all do that to some degree thinking it was something we said or did. We later realize it was not us, but the situation or the other personal. We cannot take on the burdens or actions of other. Just be mindful of that. Something was going on with this guy that he walked away. It has nothing to do with you. You have empathy for others. You can pick up the feelings from others. You were picking up on whatever was going wrong with him. Just know it was not you or something you said or did.

it's human nature to feel self conscious and even blame ourselves sometimes when things don't work out and not just for hook ups either. like you said it could be a million different reasons why. but out of the millions of things it could be i was surprised to hear you say it could be because he gets off on stuff like this, that he likes this power dynamic of making someone feel rejected and that he gets off on it. that gave me pause because i highly doubt it. that sounds more like you're trying to justify any hurt feelings you had because you were rejected. without knowing why he did it i wouldn't assume anything and just let it go.

People are just so weird and rude and thoughtless and uncaring sometimes. I had a blind date in a Mall once and the first thing the guy said to me is “oh, you look younger than I was expecting.” I was in my 30s. So weird - usually guys are disappointed if you look older. Well, I guess he wanted a more mature look - gray hair? Who knows. So I said let’s get a coffee and he got a seat while I got the coffee and I came back out and be was gone!!! So yup - it happens. I also feel that it’s my fault/guilty a lot even though I know intellectually that it’s the other person being Cuckoo!

Men are weird like that. Some of them would order a dish then in a split second when it arrives, they change their mind and want something else.

COME ON, how can anyone just... walk away from someone as cute as you? Maybe he got intimidated because you look even better in person? maybe he wasn't out and he had a last minute meltdown and decided to back off. Don't dwell on it.

Wha-- I thought you were done with Grindr

he's not out!

He sounds dodgey!

Yeah he sounds like he's still in the closet. Def his loss to turn you down. I haven't experienced that in person, but have had guys on the apps chat for weeks/months, only to say they got afraid to meet. Either too shy or thought I was going to wreck them.

The way he acted , weird. That was his lost not yours. Keeping moving life is too short.

❤ JUST FOUND YOU SIR. LIKE YOUR STYLE. REALIZE YOU MAY REMIND HIM OF SOMEONE IN HIS PAST. AND THEY WERE TRIGGERED. OR ALSO. GOD NEEDS YOU TO ERASE THIS FALSE AND DESTRUCTIVE PATTERN OF THINKING. BLESS YOU FOR SEEING THE DEEPER MEANING AND GET A BLESSING ❤

maybe he did not want a youtube video made about him

Everyone in the world wishes they could have the same opportunity this guy had with you, I can’t believe he had the opportunity and didn’t take it. He just lost the lottery forever.

Just another flake in a world of flakes

Hey Keven, This is a loyal viewer who is subscribed and ALWAYS LIKES ❤ your videos. On the one hand, you seem to be super relationship material. I even get the impression that deep down you want a long-term loving relationship. On the other hand, you're on Grindr all the time trying to have sex with strangers who happen to be visiting Miami for a little while. It seems less likely you'll meet a boyfriend / lover by hooking up with our of town stranger men. It's like you have 2 conflicting desires -- and the sex hookups seemingly win out over your desire for an LTR. This is NOT a criticism. It's merely an observation from a Midwestern guy. Maybe you are able to devote equal energy and time to finding an actual available boyfriend AND having sex hookups with strangers. I'm not a prude. Everyone has done the hookup stuff. Let's be real. Please let me know how wrong I am Keven. I'm not saying you should be a celibate nun (priests have sex as we all know ☹️). I'm just making a third party observation that may be far from the truth. Please let us loyal viewers know (only if you feel comfortable discussing it on camera). xoxo From Chicago ❤❤❤

That sucks- do you think he just got cold feet? It’s likely either wasn’t attracted In person or got cold feet because isn’t out or something

I've actually set-up meeting locations where I know that I would be able to see the person first without meeting them. That way I could make a decision and roll out if I need to without feelings hurt.

keven he just wasn't into you in person, it happens! keep it moving

People often look very different in person than in their profile pics and its not always intentional deceit. I've rejected men who showed up at my door before because they dont look like the mental image I had when talking to them on apps.

You should be greatful to him for reflecting back to you the lack of self love and fear of rejection you cary within. It comes from your childhood, it became subconscious belief that you're not worthy. Change the way you see yourself, value yourself, be confident and you'll attract different people. It's never anyone else. So don't blame anyone else, but take responsibility for what you think and believe about yourself. And you'll attract different people around you. And if they leave, accept it lightly, not a match, and let it go. This is helping you to clarify your preferences. Although you think its a negative experience, I think lots of good has come out of it.

A street corner😮……how about a spot in more quiet and neutral setting. A bench outside the tennis court in Flamingo Park or something.

i mean people have different taste so no need to shame anyones appearance or taste. but the situation was strange indeed

Here's my guess...so, I've heard a few men tell me of similar experiences that they've had; and in each case, it was because the man was expecting a slightly more masculine man, and the man that they met up with instantly went off them, because they were more feminine (in their voice and mannerisms) than they were expecting. I've heard this so many times, that I suspect that's what the 'issue' was for him. Personally, I don't think it's a big deal, but a lot of men (in the gay community) are fixated on that ('masc4masc', 'straight-acting', etc). It's okay to have a preference, but he could've been a little nicer about it (or expressed his preference, before you met). I could always be wrong, but that's my guess, as to what was going through his mind (not that it matters).

It may have been your voice and/or mannerisms. You can't always tell from a picture, but you can avoid it by speaking on the phone first.

Gurl it's no big deal.

I would have walked away too.

lol