If he doesn't want to marry you, you owe him nothing... Honesty, commitment, sex, respect, children, support, loyalty, cooking, cleaning, nothing.

My ex told me that he would never get married again because he has already done that...I moved out,got a job as a model that was very successful. He saw my pics in magazines then flew out to ask me to marry him...HELL NAWWW!!!! Too late!!!

Ladies please, if he wants the benefits of a wife without getting married, let him go! Don't let these men take advantage of you.

Personally, if I have to "put my foot down" and give a guy an ultimatum to get him to marry me, then he is not worth my time. I'd rather be with a man who's as sure about me as I am about him. Not a guy that I have to push, pull, and drag down the aisle. I'm just saying...

Marry yourself. Prioritize your life. Put things in order. Make The LORD your top priority. And watch how things fall into place. I'm a living witness.

1. He tells you he doesn’t want to get married or believe in marriage. 2. He talks about marriage only in a future based way. 3. He uses ‘but’ when he talks about marriage. Eg “I want to marry you but I have to save up for a while before we marry” 4. You guys have been together for a number of years but instead of a proposal he gets you luxurious gifts. 5. When you finally put your foot down he gets very defensive or he guilt trips you so you won’t leave.

I learned my lesson years ago with my now ex. I was with him for several years. He wanted all the benefits of a wife such as a clean house, home cooked meals exactly like the way he was used to growing up with his mother who cooked three meals a day, and unlimited sex. He was even trying to have a baby with me and make me a mother. He wanted the benefits but yet when I brought up marriage he got defensive. He claimed he was not ready for marriage yet and made all kinds of excuses why. He said that one day he would marry me and he also claimed that I was putting pressure on him. One clear sign that I should have taken that he was not going to commit was when he mentioned how he had been with exes before me for up to 5 to 10 years and more without getting married and how I was lucky that he did not leave me because when his exes would bring up marriage and would give ultimatums that he would end the relationship. I woke up one day and just looked back at all the time I had wasted with this man who was doing nothing but stringing me along. I felt I deserved so much better than having a man who I was basically shacking up with and who I was wasting years with that I could never get back. As in the words of Erica Campbell, "No pressure but I'm not a permanent girlfriend." So I told him one day that I was not pressuring him in no kind of way but that just because I was not putting any pressure on him does not mean I would continue to keep sitting around waiting for him to make up his mind and I walked away after that from the relationship. This man was already a narcissist and I already needed to get away from him anyway aside from him wasting years of my life with him. Of course he was not happy when I ended the relationship and he claimed that I was not patient enough with him, I gave up on him, and that I was a weak woman for doing that. I said you can call me whatever you want because I could careless but I will not keep wasting my time with you. Him being the narcissist he was after that he kept trying to come back in my life and I was done with him and walked away with no regrets. Fast forward today I am married to a man who loves me unconditionally, respects me, and he wasted no time with me and he put a ring on it.

#4: I just told my husband and son this. "A man doesn't get married because he's in love. He gets married to stop access to you from other men." He can love you and shack up with you, knock-you-up, the whole nine, but not marry you. When he realizes that somebody else can have you, he decides to make a decision. When he thinks you might go to someone else, he's not too worried. When he thinks someone else might ACCEPT you, he's scared.

It is sad when I watch this video and some of the actual words you say are the very words I have heard before. Gladly, I do not stay in relationships too long if they are not progressing towards marriage. Thanks for the video.

There is three reasons why guys dont get married either you like it or not 1. Hes broke 2. Your not fully wife material/ realtionship isnt healthy 3. Hes just with you for what you give him but he doesnt wanna commit to you. Instead of getting upset on why he dosnt listen and understand why he doesnt and look at his actions to see if its contradicting hes words.

How can men have a child or several children with a woman and still be on the fence about marrying her? That seems so backwards to me.

Why do black women have to fight so hard to be loved? Constantly getting fed love advice 24/7.

This girl knows what she's talking about.

I am aware that feelings are involved. However, if a man does not want to marry you, move out of his way so the person he wants can find him. He should also move out of your way, so you can find the person that wants you. Too many women waste time with men who don't want them. Walk away without being nasty or mean and cut off all communication. Cry in privacy and let it go. It will hurt like hell, but in the long run you'll be glad you made that decision.

Women need to set a time limit. Give him about 2 chances where he might get scared but if it's too far away (PLEASE LOVE YOURSELF WHEN YOU DO THIS) then just leave; no contact whatsoever. RUN.

A Man Knows Within 6 Months If You're The One!

My advice KEEP YOUR LEGS CLOSED until you are MARRIED. The old way didn't work let's do it GOD way

Her husband didn't want to marry her but he did as that was the less worse option then being alone.

Sign number one: He's gone, changed his name, all his phone numbers, moved to a new state, and you never hear from him again.

I decided last mouth after five years of dating if he doesn't pop the question within a year then its over.

I was with my ex 15 years he always ignored me when I talked about marriage so as I left him he begged to marry him. It was far to late for that

Ur right about putting your foot down and the light bulb comes on But by then the woman already has both feet out the door

My aunt lived with a man for 20 yrs.now during that time he would promise to marry her as soon as he finished building the house.each year he would go to visit his parents and they told him to marry her because previously he would take a new woman to meet them..long story short.she became ill with kidney failure.the doctor gave her 3 months to live.that was when he went to buy a ring and say he would marry her when she got well.she lived for 6mths then died.he never marry her.and now another woman is living in the house they built together..i told my aunt many times to leave him because he didn't value her..but in the end it was her decision..

this is the right video! my 1st husband was a dirty dog I begged him 2 marry me he finally gave in then he cheated constantly! I divorced him after 3 years my 2bd husband married me right away I didn't even ask him he asked me we r still 2gether and very very happy we love each other 😍😍😍😍

For a SECURE relationship. You have way more to lose than a boyfriend/girlfriend. Some people hold themselves to high value and wants to make sure the person they are with does the same and vise versa. I personally am not comfortable giving a boyfriend my all. I also would prefer a family structure.

The truth hurts, but it's needed 👌🏽❤

He won't ever marry a woman who sexes him up alllll the time. He won't marry one whose jaw his man part has full access to, although he's not her husband. Ladies stop giving a man whose not your husband all that loving. Don't do that don't do that. Save that type of stuff for your husband. Tire out your jaw on your husband not a boyfriend.

lol is simple. if you want to marry find the person that wants to marry. if you want to live with the door opened find the person that likes that. there are people out there for all that.

I can relate to this. I have been in a 6 year relationship and it has not gone anywhere. We have a child together and I'm foregoing my happiness to make sure she has a father figure in her life,but it is really a bad situation and I take full responsibility. His excuse is he will do it on his time..I'm 26 and I'm scared of what lies after I call it quits. This is confirmation for me that something needs to be done.

Men don't need to be manipulated and pinned down to realize he wants to marry you. he knows if your the one between the first day to one year. women might pick who to date but the man chooses who to marry.

I was with a guy for 6 years. In the beginning we talked marriage but we gave ourselves 3 years. 3 years came and went. Finally i asked him if he has intentions of marriage. He said yes but not now. Finally i found out he was stabbing me in the back with a friend of his. I finally decided this was a dead end so i left. 6 months later he decided he wants to marry me. I said no way. He stabbed me in the back but was very kind to me to my face. He still to this day tries to get me back into his life but i will not allow it. He is dead to me now.

GIRL YOU ARE THE BEST PUBLIC SPEAKER I HEARD ON THIS SUBJECT!

this video hit me hard 😢i was talking about marriage last week and he said all i want is the title of marriage 😭we have been together for 7years can you imagine...all he wants is a baby not marriage

This video really hit home with me.....I'm very emotional now because I so want to be married I'm 42yrs old & I gave my boyfriend of 4yrs that same speech. He who s 29yrs old chose to let me go to find someone who will marry me. It's still pretty recent we are still close and talk to each other almost daily no intimacy at all but I love and miss him so much but I'm willing to let him go to find my own true love that's meant for me.

Good for you !! I'm in the same situation and i decided to move out. I deserve someone who wants to be with me forever

When these men say " I don't want to marry" he may probably means I don't want to marry you. I have seen a couple of friends who's man left them and quickly married someone else. Anyway these women mess up when they start having babies thinking that will change his mind-it won't! You see how Lamar Odom married Khloe after one month and had a baby mama who had 3 of his children.How dumb did she feel?

She say “statistics says” no honey what does the LORD say. Stop watching videos like this ladies focus on the lord trust in him and he will provide. I know this, My life is changing because of Jesus Christ. My standards or high now. I love me now, in Christ I found my worth and my identity.

I'm always the girl they date right before they marry someone else

My ex, who I was with for 8 years, gave me every excuse in the book on why he couldn't me, and some were so ridiculous that I had to laugh, but I found out that he was cheating on me with other women and 2 were his ex girlfriend and ex wife!! He's now in my review mirror and I'm not looking back.

Good points, and true 95% of the time. Sometimes it's a timing issue and sometimes people do need time to get themselves together first and has nothing to do with their feelings for their mate. I had to put my foot down with my ex husband and he had gotten me a ring. Fast forward 2 years he made mistakes and was forgiven but thought he was going to drag his feet with the wedding date.. 20 years later I realized that I made a BIG mistake. Giving an ultimatum in hind sight was the worst thing I could have done because he wasn't ready. My advice is to just make them aware of your feelings and then just leave the relationship because you cant get back wasted time.

I'M GLAD IT'S NOT EVERY MAN SHE'S TALKING ABOUT.

I agree, the divorce rate is high. But people fail to realize that once you get married, thats only the beginning. Theres work in maintaining a marriage. Women want love and commitment. Men want respect and commitment. This is the definition of marriage. Commitment and respect/love.Without these elements then figuritively speaking, there is no marriage. Papers or not. This country, marriage is paper/business. Not love and respect which is what marriage is suppose to be based on.

Ladies guy's know from the first moment we look into your eye's if we want to marry you... And from that moment til the time it happens that's all we're focusing on,... And a real man will let you know that on the first or second date.. So that you won't have to wonder!!!

Thanks for that video. It makes things so much more clear now. It's sad, but true.

Lol I been with my boyfriend for 5 years and I have a son with him and I don't see any hope any more My younger brother is getting married this summer And his younger sister just got married It's hard being in this situation

Thanks. You make all the sense with these 5. Like the way you talk.

My boyfriend and I were together 11 years and we raised 5 kids together ( he had 2 and I had 3). I was there for him through everything. I paid for vacations, his kids Xmas presents, etc... He seems like he just enjoys hanging around with his guy friends. He makes no effort to do anything with me unless I make all the plans. When marriage is discussed...immediately I am. "crazy"...even though he lives here for free. He used to help me fix up the house but now he just goes and helps everyone else instead of helping me. Somehow I am just crazy when I get mad and stick up for myself. He needs to go.

He should be begging me to marry him! Why would I have to lower myself to ask to marry him?

He says he had a plan but he wants to get these things taken care of first.. and wants to have a nicer job.. the ring thing you said too

me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 YEARS and we are both turning 27 this year. right now i am living alone and him too and he doesnt even want us to live together or come stay with me. i am sick and tired of waiting, i want to have kids and it is so depressing to see everyone areound me getting married and having babys any our relationship is NOT MOVING FORWARD. i love him but i feel that i am the one posponing my dreams of becoming a mom because he says HE IS NOT READY after 7 years.

Y buy a cow if u can milk it for free?

Love your spirit! Thank you for keeping it real and for inspiring people to seek their best life/relationship.

This video is great. Really got me thinking.

if you cant marry someone is because you don't really love that person. come on. stop all the BS. is simple. when I or you hear that one person want to marry but the other one don't feel like it, you immediately think that that person don't really want that other one. is simple. lets stop all the BS. this don't need so much explanation. Like: Honey should we marry? she says. He says: why marry? etc......... why not? whats the problem? is all BS. you don't marry someone you don't trust or you don't see spending the rest of your life with. you don't dream about that person. is not your dream. that's all. is a hang on person for whatever time it last. that's all. don't be saying you love a person and you don't think about giving her the surprise of a ring or propose to marry, like she is not worth of that. stop fooling anybody with that BS. the only one you fool is yourself and your poor mate who never see you approaching her with the real deal. is just an indirect way to say you don't trust her. she is just dumb enough not to get the point. that's all. many women what they call love is nothing but an infatuation, love of what they get being with that other person that don't trust her.

This hit my soul... 😔

I was with a man for 6 half years. Had 2 kids lived together and the whole 9 yards. He knew i wanted to get married. And there were always excuses . i left him cause i was tired of him not changing and other reasons. He goes and less then a year later goes to his country and proposes to some girl he barely knows. What a life he wouldnt do that for me even tho he CLAIMED to love me and stuff im not mad because of feelings for him BUT im mad i put so much effort into the relationship for nothing.

Sometimes marriage is a big mistake.

thank you for posting this video. "every word" you stated is thoughts in my subconscious. thank you for the affirmations & sharing.

When He tries repeating Method Man and say " You don't need a ring to be my wife, just be there for me and I am gonna make sure we be living in......" Just know a man like that will never marry ya. Nope he's a wanna be rapper. Method Man is a happily married man and has bern for over twenty years. That line in the song was just to sell records.

The extent to which some people see marriage as an achievement is the reason why men are given ultimatums, we put each other under pressure and find ourselves marrying for the wrong reasons. If it's meant to be, trust me it will happen.

I personally wouldn't want to marry someone after being with them for over 3 years. What is there to look forward to? By that time your sex life has diminished, nasty habits have been revealed, and you guys have gotten too comfy. Now, some would say that the longer you're together, the better, But it's the unknown, the freshness, the newness, that makes it exciting. If after 3 years, and he hasn't mentioned anything about marriage means he's getting his free milk. Moooo!

love, love, LOVE your video!! Thanks for the advice!

I loved your advice and wisdom on the subject! Thank you so much, I think 3-6 years is a really decent time to see if this is who you can see yourself marrying. Anything more and it just starts to become a time waste for the both involved. Thanks again! :)

I really appreciate your tone of voice so one can absorb the info

I would think that the first sign of him not going to marry you is his not asking you. Call me quirky, but I don't think that you have to be Columbo to figure that out.

Sorry to hear of your situation. I hate to say this, but he's actually doing you a favor. He's letting you know that it's time for you to move on, to someone who is worthy of your time. A lot of guys don't know what they want in their 20's, but there are plenty of guys who want the same thing as you.

love your advice. everything you said is spot on. i really appreciate your words, thnx.

Coach Crystal, very true. Wish I had known this years ago. Thank you.

Truth!!! So wise! Everything you said was right.

Everything you said is spot on.

It's a shame we have to figure it out...if men were honest and didnt play games...we wouldn't have to check for signs!

fortunately i am always honest, forthcoming and truthful with every single woman i pretty much meet that i will never be a father and will never be married. i have never lied about that and never would.

i have my own job as a clinical pharmacist . believe me it pays sooo good i don't need a man's money, in a matter of fact it is the ultimate recognition for me to let anyone to take care of me or pay for me .

Thank you for this amazing video! Great advice♡♡♡♡♡

Crystal you make some really good points. Can't wait to view more of your videos.

Thank you for this video, it really helped me!

Wow..just came across your video and subscribed! I am in this situation currently and have been in turmoil about where do I go from here..thank you for giving me clarity. I deserve better

I'm out after 6months to a year if he doesn't propose

I needed this! Thank you so much 👏🏽

Really good video! Thanks for the advice!

IT PROBABLY TOOK ME 3 YEARS TO VIEW THIS VIDEO, SO I KNOW I WOULD N-E-V-E-R GIVE ANYONE 3 YEARS OF MY PRECIOUS LIFE!!!!! YOU WILL NEVER WASTE MY PRECIOUS TIME LIKE THAT!!!! AINT GONNA HAPPEN!!!! SO TAKE THAT CRAP ELSEWHERE.... TIME AINT FOREVER, AND LIFE IS PRECIOUS!!!! AND SO SHOULD YOU BE..... SO TREAT YOUR SELF LIKE A QUEEN AND BE HAPPY WITH LIFE, AND LOVE YOURSELF FIRST AND FOREMOST FIRST...... 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

I was married for 11 years n divorced for 5yrs. Marriage is overrated.

You're so great for this love it!

This is the best advice I have read in a long time. Thank you soo much!! It has really helped me.

Don't push us to get married; We will marry when we are ready to do so. Get that. When you keep insisting men to marry you; we feel pushed and wonder why the rush. Patience is virtue let the man take time and be of good character and he will marry you. We put women pending to see if we can live with them forever.

I love my boyfriend so much. He's the best. We have been together 1 and a half years. I want marriage, he always replies "One day, or name a date" jokingly. How much longer should I wait? The 3 year rule is scary, and painfully truthful.

Amazing coach Cristal. Thanks!

This is for the women watching---I lived with my wife for three years before marriage. Then one afternoon I was laying on the bed watching TV and she was laying next to me reading the Sunday paper. Then all of a sudden she rolls over towards me and says WELL WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO MARRY ME. Caught me completely by surprised 😮I stammered Arhhh whenever . We were married 3 months later and it was the best decision of my life. She was the greatest woman to ever draw breath I just needed that extra poke I guess When she died I cried for two whole days. I was heartbroken. So maybe your man just needs a little poke to get him moving. 👍👍🙂

What about if we refuse to become intimate until after we've exchanged marriage vows in the first place?

Thats good advice👍

What was said in this video rings true in so many ways. Especially the advice she got from her husband.

This willbe the trend. He will comtinue to try to keep you around for as long as your are convient to him. Men have no concern for any body but themselves

ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS LISTEN CAREFUL.

#6. You're an American woman, which means you are twice as likely as your husband to eventually file for divorce.

This was great. My ex said the I need a better job let’s move to another apartment let me save money but had all the yeezys i put my foot down... and left abruptly and and he came back we tried to work things out but he it didn’t feel or his actions didn’t show he was serious and things ended. We see each other ever couple of months but he never doesn’t to me. It’s odd bc I took care of him like I was his nurse with his stomach diseases.

good one, i loved it all the way

No problem i knew already everything i knew it and i can feel him that he wont marry me👌

We're both not ready. I'm not concern about the time unless it's been past 3 years or more. I want to be confident that this is the person for me. Need to get to know people as much as possible these days. Also, I'm an average person that has to get my ducks in a row ( Financially, spiritually, etc) . So there's no rush to commit my entire life . Just enjoy life.

Preach it honey because you’re most definitely talking the truth Amen

Hey, "SoulmateCoachChrystal," I haven't seen you in years. I used to watch your videos when I first got on social media. You've taught me a lot.