Having kids makes ALL the difference in a split up. If there were no kids, my situation and 99% of others would be a cakewalk. Divorce is hard. Divorce with kids is hell. Big difference.

Stayed and should’ve left. Have grandkids now and will be in this until I die. 50+ years married.

Kids are observant. They know what is happening. Depending on age they may understand all the details or just the general idea. We never told our daughter about my wife’s affair but she knew all along. I waited until she came to me. She would say she saw certain things or “felt” something was not right and I would affirm the fact that she was observant and that she was not imagining those things and yes, they are hard. She finally asked point blank if my wife was involved with this other person and I said yes. I won’t lie to the kids. I affirm how hurtful it feels and how angry they are. Our daughter is very angry with her mother. I can’t tell her she is wrong to feel that way. It is my wife’s job to repair that lost trust and anger is how I see it. I try to reinforce the face that she loves her though and that she is the only mother she will have so try to forgive her. I still haven’t been able to but perhaps she will. I hope so. For her sake.

My wife and I were the last couple. We got along. We had a great life in many ways but we each needed something. I never wanted the marriage to end but she had an affair which destroyed not only our marriage but our friendship. We can’t speak to one another anymore. It is brutal and watching the kids suffer as their home life has been split in two is brutal. Not only did she have an affair, she had one with the mother of one our children’s friends. Now the entire social network is polarized and the kids see their mother as a traitor. It is a hell.

After living a complete lie, and for so long, I almost feel as if I’m fake, I’m not real anymore. I’m just a body with nothing inside. I’m desensitized, I have no feelings, my smile and laughter is fake. I’m crushed and lost. Almost to the point that I don’t want to live anymore