What Do Narcissists Really Believe?

Рет қаралды 138,475

Күн бұрын

Darren Magee discusses the belief system of narcissists. What do they really believe? What do they believe about the word around them? And what do they want you to believe? Exploring questions such as 'why do narcissists behave the way they do?, Why are they so emotionally destructive? What are narcissistic behaviours and what drives them?
What is narcissism?
Four different types of narcissist
Overt (Grandiose) narcissist
Covert (Vulnerable) narcissist
Communal narcissist (Public)
Closet narcissist (Worship and devotion to someone else)
Traits, behaviours, characteristics of narcissists
Lack of empathy
Lack of emotional depth
Unable to regulate emotion
Indulging in emotional abuse - mind control games
Belief vs Reality
What do narcissists really fear?
Can the narcissist be 'helped'?
Other videos you might find interesting:
Why did the narcissist pick me?
• What Attracts a Narcis...
What happens when the narcissist can no longer control you?
• What happens when the ...
How covert narcissists manipulate
• How Covert Narcissists...
The narcissist's false superiority complex
• The Narcissist's False...
Please feel free to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
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#narcisissm #narcissisticbeliefs #whatdonarcissistsfear

Пікірлер: 677

@DarrenFMagee 3 жыл бұрын

The videos I make are topics suggested by you the viewer. Feel free to suggest any mental health or psychology subjects you'd like me to cover in future videos. Just a reminder though, these videos are not a substitute for support from a mental health professional.

@gregwindell7702 2 жыл бұрын

FORREST FENNS SEARCHERS COMMUNITY MARVEL GAZE

@sausage6984 2 жыл бұрын

How to completely destroy a narcisist. Step by step guide please.

@casbondi2239 2 жыл бұрын

Hi, I would love something about how a parent can help children who have a narcissistic parent (acknowledging that both parents likely unhealthy). Much appreciated.

@christopherheath6523 Жыл бұрын

I know someone who is like that. SHE TOOK OVER MY PHONE NUMBERS AND EMAIL ADDRESES, FROM MY LAWFUL RIGHT TO CON-TROLL MY BNY MELLON ACCOUNT ACCESS.

@onlythaclonessir2525 Жыл бұрын

LET PONCIE TAKE A SHAVE ???

@scotttully8572 2 жыл бұрын

They'll do ANYTHING to avoid accountability.

@jelizabethpetrie6656 2 жыл бұрын

Hit’s the nail on the head.

@thegreenfairy5039 2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely.

@williamtiffee3799 2 жыл бұрын

Indeed. Reminds me of a recurring post I've seen several times on YT: "The narcissist's Prayer." (i.e. Of non- accountability...)

@Megdracula 2 жыл бұрын

Why is it so hard? All humans make error. Why can’t they just say so? Why do they blame even when it’s something trivial???? It’s not going to kill them to say oooops my bad I messed up I apologize. I’ll try harder next time or anything along those lines but they can’t. They won’t die admitting a fault!!! I don’t GET IT

@williamtiffee3799 2 жыл бұрын

@@Megdracula That's because the "false self" is perfect, and "infallible." Narcs do NOT have an "ego" in the fully developed sense, and the vast majority of them discarded their "inner child" (self and soul... due to abuse, neglect and/ or entitlement) between the ages of 3- 9, before the real self emerged as an individualized, EGO. They are looking for attention, validation and to "indoctrinate you, into their world..." then gradually pass the "baggage baton," and later ultimately DISCARD YOU, after transforming "the other" into what they then view as: "the NARC." Unless they are (close) family, MOVE ON on and go "No Contact," or they WILL make you increasing more "like them," because it's literally an all- pervasive, mind, body and soul, parasitism. (i.e. "Emotional vampire," succubus!) And they'll take it, to the grave. (Do NOT change...)

@donnaholton1981 2 жыл бұрын

A liar that believes their own lies are the most dangerous people

@JohnSmith-bm6zg 3 ай бұрын

Politicians?

@laurajane4806 Жыл бұрын

Narc's greatest fears: (1) Exposure of the false self (shame); (2) Loss of control of the victim (proof they're not omnipotent).

@karlabritfeld7104 2 жыл бұрын

It's all about them. They come first, everyone else comes last.

@user-zp1sr8kn6k 2 жыл бұрын

There is no one else, only themselves.

@Proud-Obese-unhealthy-American Жыл бұрын

That is called being selfish, not narcissistic. Two completely different things but unintelligent people just seem to conflate the two and combine a cluster of negative personality traits and label them as "narcissism" to sound smart on KZfaq.

@debbieg1406 Жыл бұрын

They even have to walk in front of you if we ever walk anywhere!! Now I know why.

@The311wax1980 Жыл бұрын

After catching my now ex wife texting with a guy she confessed to me about multiple affairs she had over the course of our 5 year marriage. Two days later while my world was falling apart she told me she wasn't going to feel bad about it anymore, that she had forgiven herself. Even after everything I've learned about narcissism it's still difficult to wrap my head around this behavior. It's just straight up evil.

@Cornusnuttallii 9 ай бұрын

That's why narcissists confess... assuage guilt and dump it on the other person to forgive. AHHhhh....

@amber40494 8 ай бұрын

I had to laugh, sorry, i know it was painful for you. My narc ex told me ge was taking me off his medical insurance after i was diagnosed with breast csncer and needed surgery. I had to laugh because i always paid all my medical bills myself, even though i had no insurance. It was in y face evidence he was uncaring and more worried about his premiums than my health.

@amber40494 8 ай бұрын

He would ignore me instead of arguing, never ever engaged, it was like who is this person i martied???

@amber40494 8 ай бұрын

He always made the decisions even though he never let me know until hed done them. Hows that for superiority complex? He hated my cat but waited til i was out of town to have the cat euthanized. Horrendous

@MattyNelson-rs3ik 7 ай бұрын

She had to make an excuse for her bad behavior to justify her actions.

@lindainphx6515 2 жыл бұрын

This is the most spot-on description of the narcissist that I've ever heard/seen.

@jamiemacdonald208 2 жыл бұрын

The most surreal thing having been in a relationship with a covert narcissist was that she couldn't get her head around that I had had a meaningful life before I met her. It was like to her my life only began when I was an extension of her. It was like before then I had been an ethereal being only becoming flesh when I met her. Other people doing brilliant things outside of her, she just could not comprehend. It was the same speaking about my life before I met her. Met with complete incomprehension. Unless of course I mentioned another girlfriend. Then the jealousy would go off the scale, even when I hadn't heard or seen of that girlfriend for decades. As I say. Surreal.

@bookmaid1 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this comment. I have tried to explain a similar experience but didn't have the words!

@deejohnsson109 2 жыл бұрын

I can identify... my Mrs couldn't get her head around me continuing with any of my interests that I had before we met... like my life was now a blank page to written with whatever she deemed important to her and no one else

@Agape122 2 жыл бұрын

Omg same experience! You explained it very well. Its very weird indeed I dnt know how I ignored that this was not normal

@deirdreday8731 2 жыл бұрын

Jamie i would have my doubts about you. Are you sure your not a Narc. I detect it in the tone of your post.

@dolores2716 2 жыл бұрын

My narc ex talked as if he hatched me out of an egg even though I was almost 30 when we met. Unless I had an experience with him, it never entered his mind that I had already had that experience in the past. And this could apply to some incredibly common things.

@petet968 2 жыл бұрын

Living in the moment... I knew a narc that would say anything to look good in the moment. "I'm going to do this. I'm going to do that." But never followed through. It was forgotten as soon as the moment passed. If challenged they would give you the death stare or say "I never said that."

@Joelswinger34 2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, I had a friend who would tell the stupidest lies and constantly contradicted himself. I thought it was his ADD, but now I think he is just a narc. I dumped him.

@brianlane9534 2 жыл бұрын

But never followed through. I've heard it described as "future faking". The past few years have been the most horrible experience of my life.

@ViralVibes_01 2 жыл бұрын

@@Joelswinger34 yeah same here I also was told it was ADD but he was so mean and flakey and brutally nasty.. I could not handle and love him anymore

@Tryagain563 2 жыл бұрын

Yep: "I never said that!"

@Tryagain563 2 жыл бұрын

@@brianlane9534 very sorry to hear it Brian!

@xannaxanna9854 Жыл бұрын

This is the best description I have ever heard. I have researched this personilty type thouroughly. I lived it for 3 years, confused af. This video should be in every classroom in America, his explanation is 💯. The torture of being abused by a narcissist, not knowing that this type of personality exsist, caused me to suffer much. They try to make you their slave, in many ways. They are only selfish, disloyal, stupid, destructive and chaotic. RUN fast, it's like committing spiritual suicide staying with them.

@c4m774 Жыл бұрын

Very true best too run and save your health and mind set

@petergreen96669 Жыл бұрын

"Spiritual suicide."

@wildrose12.47 Жыл бұрын

Great video, very good overview of what makes them tick. “There’s a difference between a change in a person and a change in tactic”. That is a great statement. They don’t learn to be a better person, only a better manipulator!

@musicmadeforyou6316 Жыл бұрын

Thanks Darren. I always feel either depressed or afraid around narcissists

@rakelpeneyambeko 7 ай бұрын

You are not alone, same here.

@MaileyMcAslan 2 жыл бұрын

“Every solution has a problem.” 🤣

@Porsche_911_Experience 28 күн бұрын

So true

@drfoye219 3 жыл бұрын

I keep coming back to this video, it's got to be the best explained on this subject

@jellybean6778 2 жыл бұрын

Agreed. These are the most helpful videos, with practical and relevant advice. Thank you, Dr.

@annettavicckies298 2 жыл бұрын

Exactly

@tanickasinclair7035 2 жыл бұрын

I agree. I created a transcript of a few of Darren's vlogs.

@heynunya5986 2 жыл бұрын

Ikr

@debifambro1039 Жыл бұрын

Me too 🙂

@chrisecker9341 2 жыл бұрын

My ex-wife argued with my father who was a MD many times about health topics and she talked like she was the better MD - but she wasn‘t a MD at all. Everybody on the table scratched their heads.

@pippagatz 2 жыл бұрын

My friend's ex wife insisted on going into the doctors with him and tried to tell the doctor what was wrong with him... Always wrong of course! Crazy, nasty humans

@katrienvh4289 2 жыл бұрын

What I have noticed about narcissists, is that they have a list of rules, but those rules don't apply to themselves. And if you tell them that, they will change to topic and accuse you of something. Even things that happend years ago. Or if they don't get what they want of someone, then they will try to make other people get angry at that person, pit them against each other.

@fancy134ify 2 жыл бұрын

so true

@brianlane9534 2 жыл бұрын

BINGO! She will tell the most outrageous lie, then an hour later say, "I never said that." It's amazing.

@RP0415 Жыл бұрын

Once again, this describes my father 100%. I had to live through 42 years of narcissistic abuse which constantly made me question my sanity. Finally I can put a name to the abuse and start my journey towards recovery.

@wisegentle7859 2 жыл бұрын

Excellent description of my mother and ex-husbands...they made me feel like a whipped dog. I am aware and free from these people now, thank you Darren F Magee for exposing these abusive behaviors

@choosepeacetoday 2 жыл бұрын

Wise Gentle: Perfect description of that feeling. " Whipped dog"

@eyespy0070 2 жыл бұрын

That's why I'm single. No repeat of my own mother. Had to walk again and again. Just left one again. They love us....its brutal. I believe there's an energy.

@CTSCAPER 2 жыл бұрын

You're the first person who I've seen touch on how a narcissist wants to be seen as the alpha. Most people talk about narcissists wanting control, which I suppose is what alphas want, however, the way a narcissist goes about getting control is so messed up. I have no problems with a good leader, however, the way a narcissist leads is downright pathetic and over time their lack of leadership will take any organization, or family down. Initially, their false confidence fools people into thinking they are a leader, and only after some time do people spot how it's all about the narcissist. Unfortunately, by the time most realize what is going on the narcissist has become well embedded and is difficult to cut ties with.

@hissyfitz7890 2 жыл бұрын

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “I’VE MADE MY MIND UP; DON’T CONFUSE ME WITH FACTS.” ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

@louiseevans5752 2 жыл бұрын

YAA & RT IN FRONT OF THEIR EYES,,,

@shereeholland172 Жыл бұрын

Darren is spot on! Having worked with these type of toxic individuals and being related to one it is right on the money! If you look at the DSM (Diagnostic Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders) and you read the criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder it is somewhat difficult for some Psychologists to translate it into laymen's terms if they have not personally experienced this grinding, relentless, mentally and physically exhausting behaviour which breaks you down in slow fragments. Hi from Australia, and as a Registered Psychologist thru AHPRA!

@keirmathur16 2 жыл бұрын

Great work! “Discern the difference between a change in behavior and a change in tactic”. Spot on! If the narc changes to play nice, they just want something. That’s all, then they’ll change to their usual self again. - Can a narc change long term? Yes (in theory), and I suppose a caterpillar could change into a kangaroo, just don’t be disappointed when it doesn’t happen.

@deetheman3508 4 жыл бұрын

4:52 The sort of person who wets the bed and blames the blanket, or blames their victim for not telling them to go to the bathroom before going to sleep - have you met my ex lol?

@motorcityblacksheep121 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for a concise description of their behaviors, tactics etc. The validation it brings is priceless.

@jp4546 Жыл бұрын

“ I’ve made my mind up, don’t confuse me with facts.” Spot on.

@sandywiles 2 жыл бұрын

If only more people understand the inner dynamics of how a narcissist thinks and behaves…. This would be revolutionary! I think the door is now opening to their illness and how it affects those around them … 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

@kayokk- Жыл бұрын

That “connection level“ was absolutely spot on👍🏼 No matter how many years you spend with them your connection is always extremely weak and fleeting at best.

@ammj6202 2 жыл бұрын

This is hitting everything from my experience. It is unreal to find yourself with these kinds of people. The biggest irony I am finding among some of the victims I know, is that they never figured out the problem was Narcissism or they are still in denial about the abuse they report. I have watched people gaslight themselves or totally glaze over the facts that they present to me. The narcissist is the elephant in the room that they talk about, but won't quite point out.

@Proud-Obese-unhealthy-American Жыл бұрын

The funny thing is the biggest narcissist always seem to think everyone else is crazy, In denial, etc. Your post reeks of narcissism.

@ammj6202 Жыл бұрын

@@Proud-Obese-unhealthy-American The narcissist gaslights and manipulates people, thats exactly what they do to their victims. Cognitive dissonance is real among victims...that doesn't make them narcissists or crazy, nor does it imply that Im calling victims narcissists. Victims are confused and many don't know what narcissism is or its terminology. It's called being in "the fog". Seeing Narcissism for what it is doesn't make you a narcissist but every person who discovers narcissism can then understand the tactics used on them. But most, if not many are not looking for a mental disorder... victims or narcissism will blame themselves, make excuses, or still live within that cognitive dissonance when the situationship subsides.

@KizetteandTotoro Жыл бұрын

After waking up from a bad case of brainwashing by an alcoholic monster and finally understanding what he was doing to me, I truly appreciate the sense of humour. Before I met him, I was always lauhging and joking with my friends, I would go to work singing every day…I had a life, and it was wonderful. I am slowly recovering pieces of me and finding humour in the ridiculous world of this evil narcissist makes me feel better, and look forward to the day when I break free…(YEs, I do sing Queen’s song while I’m hoovering!). I have been calling him the AA, (the alcoholic as****e) just secretly, to myself. The Terminator analogy made me chuckle. It remind me of when I first started to feel like I was healing and every time I heard him explode with rage at… whatever…I would sing to myself AC/DC’s song “TNT” to get the edge off and stop him from dragging me to his hell ...Hell’s Bells! :-)Thank you very much.

@agathagelderloos5174 Жыл бұрын

That last part about the covert narc just hit me like a sucker punch!! They thrive on you fussing over them!! O, my God! That is their supply! And the fussing is never good enough! When I confronted him with this he said: “Are you giving up on me?” Making it look like it was my responsibility to change him or wait for him to change. And I bought it hook, line and sinker! Looking back on it, it was all pretty pathetic!! So glad I am out of it!! But this video is a very good summary of what is really going on inside their head.. they would never admit to it but it becomes obvious after a while...

@jamesmcpeake1515 4 жыл бұрын

15:02 'Discern the difference between the change in a person and the change in a tactic' So right. I so wish I'd known this back when I was constantly being guilted into staying and giving another chance by both my mother and later my (now) ex-wife. What about children of narcissistic parents? What happens to them when they grow up?

@DarrenFMagee 3 жыл бұрын

Glad you found it helpful

@sms1067 2 жыл бұрын

They often either become narcissistic themselves or become codependent which sets them up for a lifetime full of narcissistic relationships. Ask me how I know…

@burkaboy1 2 жыл бұрын

It depends what role they were assigned I guess , the scapegoat usually figure out best if they figure it out and learn to deal with the trauma

@learningenglishthroughtran8540 2 жыл бұрын

They would be doing wonderfully like everybody else. just like anybody who goes through difficulties. They have strengths just like everybody else.

@gladysabalagajarakukeba7890 2 жыл бұрын

@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 and just be living pitiful lives being shadows of themselves. No more of that for me!!

@jillneumann4918 Жыл бұрын

My narc told me “I am happy with who I am” after 5 yrs of abuse. I left and went no contact. Enough is enough.

@haritharocks 2 жыл бұрын

I am shocked to see someone mouth my own words.. Everything i journaled is pretty much the same as What I hear from you.. Thanks a ton for validating my feelings. I am gona save this video for reassurance whenever in doubt.. Ur videos have helped us a lot. Thanks a ton

@charleyybrewer6430 2 жыл бұрын

OMG that is absolutely the most perfect description of the narcissist. Thank you so much.

@mejohn101 3 жыл бұрын

Wow. Beautiful, spot on description. Thanks so much for this reflection. Offers a lot of clarity to hear it put in words.

@TC-gx3qn Жыл бұрын

Thank you, Darren. That was such a great tip to discern the difference in a changed person and a changed tactic.

@Tatiana-um2my 2 жыл бұрын

This video LITERALLY saved me!!!!!

@nanalen60 2 жыл бұрын

OMgosh! You absolutely described my boss.

@allaboutgrace2560 2 жыл бұрын

Narcissists are VERY DECEIVING; because they, themselves are so trapped in DECEPTION!! And IF you DO NOT have DISCERNMENT; you can EASILY be DECEIVED by them! THANK YOU, SIR, for posting these videos! They have been VERY INFORMATIVE; and have helped ASSIST ME in having MORE understanding of what my YOUNGEST SON has to ENDURE for the sake of getting to spend time with the one who MEANS MOST TO HIM, HIS SON!

@TheCazz10 Жыл бұрын

This was so accurate!! Especially doing charitable stuff in public and plastering it on social media

@bettyk3372 Жыл бұрын

This is so accurate of my ex husband that I’m shaking my head in agreement to everything you just described. It’s unreal how you explained all of his characteristics so well! 👍

@butterflygirl2285 2 жыл бұрын

What I can never figure out is what my narcissistic sibling thinks he is winning by pushing others away from him due to his cruel behavior. He does not lead a successful life, and has always been dependent on others to support him. He gets in a rage over minor issues, and blows them out of proportion. His behavior is very strange.

@sgist7824 2 жыл бұрын

I suffer the same from mine. Everything is everyone's fault never his. His life has become chaotic, he takes no responsibility and feeds off drama always needing saving. Also responds with rage, threats, threats of suicide and more. But to the outside world is charm personified.

@nd612 2 жыл бұрын

Darren F. Magee: I haven't seen any Narcissist do this in front of a 3rd person. So it's safe to say they only do it to their supply which is their Victim, their only Victim?

@angelas.3645 2 жыл бұрын

This is spot on. Very well explained. Best I’ve seen! I just happened to see this channel by accident. I immediately subscribed; everything he has explained I have witnessed.

@tomorrowmely3624 2 жыл бұрын

Having a narcissistic grown-up daughter is an excruciating pain, when you have barely survived the malignant narcissism in a family member before. It also carries a stigma, because it's extremely difficult to find support. First of all, because narcissists are so good at isolating you while providing others with a perfect image of themselves and a totally wrong image of you. Second, because when you really feel like opening up and sharing what you're going through with someone, they first thing they tell you is that it must be your fault and that you must be the abusive parent that they are rebelling against. It's so hard and extremely confusing. I wonder if you could help us parents who have done their best in a difficult situation, sometimes having to protect the child from an abusive ex partner, and ending up become the adult child's scapegoat. I always feel like I could go no contact with anyone, but that I still have to stand by my daughter. However, I cannot deal with the abuse anymore.

@uyoebyik 2 жыл бұрын

I had to go no contact with my daughter in the end. She just got worse with age

@forcabrasil6128 Жыл бұрын

Devil's joke!

@aujuliawod Жыл бұрын

You aren’t required to let abuse happen to you. It doesn’t matter if it’s your daughter. You are allowed to cut that tie for your own well being. That being said it is hard to believe that your child just came out that way and your parenting had nothing to do with it. It’s possible on rare occasions but most people are shaped by their childhood. 🤷🏻‍♀️

@tomorrowmely3624 Жыл бұрын

@@aujuliawod I never said that parenting had nothing to do with it, although I now tend to believe that there may be a genetic side to the personality. Her father left me when I was pregnant and then wanted to come back, but also made it clear that he would not pay any money for child support. He harassed me for years until the case went to court and I won. I do believe that part of the problem also comes from the attempted parental alienation by the father. I wish she could realize and seek therapy, but narcissist rarely do. It's painful, but for the moment, I don't know what to do.

@cynthiazimnick5088 2 жыл бұрын

You are right on. I turned my karate school over to my head student in order to save the school. My husband would proclaim that I (Masteraster) didn't know what I was doing and everyone must listen to him. My head students would just laugh behind his back. COVED forced the school to close. My students are always happy to see me and I still enjoy their company.

@sharpestartist5304 Жыл бұрын

You've described narcissism extremely well. Easily to relate to and understand.

@rettssong5251 2 жыл бұрын

When you say they accuse you are everything they do THIS is correct. I learned this about a year ago with my husband. He stopped going to therapy because he didn't like what the therapist told him. It's very tiresome and a total waste of time and life and if these people ONLY realized how happy they COULD BE if they left ALL the BS behind perhaps they would.

@louiseevans5752 2 жыл бұрын

THEY C A N ' T THEIR SO CALLED BRAINS WILL NOT EVER "GET IT "

@joyjones6927 Жыл бұрын

The win-win explanation where they need to feel or look good and others need to feel or look bad helped a lot. Thanks.

@kimkoch3272 2 жыл бұрын

The person i was with i often said he was “combative” never understood why everything was so difficult and would lead to arguments and rages . Minor things that were truly insignificant. He once screamed at a server because his pretzel was cold. He was entitled , to treat people poorly, because he was successful. Employees, waitstaff, etc. i always found myself apologizing for him.

@anjaliv2117 2 жыл бұрын

They are worst creatures on earth. 🤢🤢🤢..

@jeanettecook1088 Жыл бұрын

The first thing I observed the narcs in my life to be or do, is that they believed they're perfect. They are never responsible for anything. 🎉

@craiganderson936 2 жыл бұрын

Once again thank you... YOU hit the nail on the head.... my ex-girlfriend. 💯 percent.. I thought I was just me... She wouldn't try counseling to help our relationship..she is always right and cut off my conversation with her.. She had to be the Alpha... THANK YOU..

@kimkoch3272 2 жыл бұрын

I have watched many you tubes on this topic. You are by far the person that has accurate information. Its like you knew him!

@scotttully8572 2 жыл бұрын

My favorite narc moment was when she took the vacuum cleaner from the 25-year car washer to show him how it's really done. 🤦 So embarrassing!

@pippipster6767 3 жыл бұрын

Can you do a video on recovery time. I was entangled with a covert for 18 years. Been 13 months of complete removal. Do feel very much better, but still quite effected.

@DarrenFMagee 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your suggestion I will do 👍 In the meantime, you mentioned 18 years with a covert. I made a video recently on narcissistic abuse syndrome which might help you understand what you’ve been experiencing for the past 13 months. I will say though recovery is a process. Be kind to yourself and thanks again for the suggestion

@nicolaihel9165 10 ай бұрын

Wish I'd watch this one vid 3 years ago when you posted it. Might have saved me a lot of heartache, time, money and health.

@Eva-me5ol 2 жыл бұрын

I've never heard this explained this clearly before, the details are surprisingly so exact. Thanks for your videos.

@spindrifter7519 2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely right. Before I retired I was a successful Commercial Manager with an annual budget of £4,500,000. My ex wife and I took over a Preschool business (it was her dream) and would she listen to me about managing the finances. NO. But hey although she had no business experience at all she knew better than me. The outcome: A Preschool that had been going in the local Community for 30+ years was destroyed. But hey its not her fault. She was / still is, Never Wrong & Never Sorry just like her horrible Mother. 6 months after the closure of the school she started cheating with an obvious lowlife downgrade. I confirmed that was the case left her and divorced her. I make the joke about my wife: If My wife drove her car into a tree; it would be the tree's fault.

@edgreen2660 Жыл бұрын

Very good. Thank you. I have one suggestion. At the end, instead of saying the Narcissist says, "I've made my mind up. Don't confuse me with facts," say that (s)he says, "I've made my mind up. Don't annoy me with facts."

@lindalenz888 2 жыл бұрын

Oh my goodness!!! This information is exactly spot on & what I Need because my Daughter-In-Law is!!! My Son is belittled pretty well daily, she is explosive! Re-writes always, mis-wording to her advantage!!! I will send to my Son who lives states away with my grandchildren 😢

@deborahwentworth8792 2 жыл бұрын

That could be why my ex watched the Terminator over and again.He must have every single line in that movie totally memorized for as many times as he watched it

@Anivasion 2 ай бұрын

I've been through a gamut of emotions as I learn more about the narcissist I married than I ever learned while I was with him. And yet I was experiencing SO many of the tactics in these topics. In my processing of those hellish days of living with a bipolar covert narcissist, I experienced textbook abuse that I didn't identify because I saw the world through my own scope and I couldn't reconcile that abuse coming from someone who could also seem so attentive and loving, at times. Once you understand their motivation is manipulation and NOT real love (real love cares about your wellbeing and they do not) then everything else makes sense. I've heard all of this stuff before. I used to feel like it didn't apply to me even though he checked all the boxes, because he had a "good" side too. I've been a fool for too many years already. Thank you for making these videos, it's like the lights have been thrown and I am seeing so many things I already "knew", in that new light

@andre1987eph 2 жыл бұрын

This was tough to listen to but it is the truth unfortunately

@SparkingLife111 2 жыл бұрын

Well that was epic. Thank you. Very healing and validating

@christinemcgarry7754 2 жыл бұрын

This is the BEST video I've seen so far! Thank you!

@MJ-qb5ph 2 жыл бұрын

My God this is frighteningly accurate - it describes my family totally

@JohnSmith-bm6zg 3 ай бұрын

This is one of the deepest darkest philosophical quandaries ever pondered. The answer is probably nothing at all, and possibly everything at once.

@reneec2583 2 жыл бұрын

Magnificent explanation of what I've been living with! Thank you for your videos. This one's a keeper. It will remind me that I'm not imagining things. Someone else knows and sees what a narcissist is, even though the Flying Monkeys who protect my husband cannot understand who they are protecting. Thank you again, for making these videos. It really helps to know that someone understands what it is.

@truthseeker-cz6lf 2 жыл бұрын

They are more of an expert in the expertise you have! So true, I am an IT expert 25 years but there times that she knows my field better than me LOL.

@TheHillrat4wd 2 жыл бұрын

one of the better videos on this topic. Thank you.

@AllahNuke Жыл бұрын

This has completely blown my mind. Very thankful for this man and his channel. I'm speechless. You're shedding a lot of light. Thank you.

@annettavicckies298 2 жыл бұрын

Wow! I'm glad I found you ❤ You've answered allot of questions and people I've dealt with who I cutoff recently.. I cannot believe what I am hearing. I never heard of gaslighting before. This is amazing and freeing. Dealing with someone now like that. Unfortunately I'm trying get my personal property back and close doors 🚪

@kayokk- Жыл бұрын

I had to write another comment because the video turned out to be astoundingly accurate and living truth of that experience. Bravo and hats off.

@michaelsigmon1905 2 жыл бұрын

perhaps you've done this video already, but I am looking very hard for a video regarding dealing with the aftermath of being raised by a narcissist or in a relationship with a narcissist. I am extremely clear that my victimizer was/is a narcissist. I've removed that person from my life. Now I'm trying to deal with the aftermath of bad behaviors I learned from them, and also dealing in a healthy manner with the anger and pain that results from their abuse. Thank you.

@DarrenFMagee 2 жыл бұрын

Hello and thank you for your question. I have made videos on roles in narcissistic families, the affects and have recently started putting videos out on recovery. Have a look at my playlists hopefully you’ll find what you need, if not I’ll be happy to make one more specifically.

@tatendadune171 2 жыл бұрын

Topic suggestion: Narcissistic cults and/or family systems.

@andre1987eph 2 жыл бұрын

You did a good job separating the fantasy we have about them and the reality. They are very hard to spot. I have seen world experts such as Dr. Ramani unwittingly get into professional alliances with covert narcissist here on KZfaq

@williamtiffee3799 2 жыл бұрын

The "helping fields" are full of (covert) narcs. Anywhere they can bamboozle and "power play" people, from children to the elderly, they do flock... like the parasitic energy vampires, they all are. And likewise, in psychology and psychiatry. (Many narcs have psych degrees, to advanced mind control and manipulation techniques training... and are in "politics, to religion.") My eighty year old mother is in an "independent living" place in California that is FULL OF these people. (From the former director, to several employees and a disproportionately HIGH percentage of the 100ish residents... many families want nothing to do with, later on.) Since the advent of TV, Hollywood, and public indoctrination while both parents work outside of the home... there has been an EXPLOSION in (intentionally) "institutionalized and collectivized," narci- schism. (From academia, to the corporate environment.)

@bcpr9812 2 жыл бұрын

Who with?

@cynthiawhite1122 4 ай бұрын

Best to explain your accusation if you feel entitled to make it.

@amandahorvath6082 2 жыл бұрын

Your absolutely so right about everything you say, spot on

@Jlk9711 2 жыл бұрын

The first time I watched your videos, It was hard to understand the accent. Now, 5 videos deep, I completely understand you 100% fluently haha

@anikalee9012 Жыл бұрын

This is extremely helpful. After educate myself about the NPD abuse I got. I find difficult to explain some behaviour some supplies. Your explanation sum it all up. My mind become clear. Thanks you so much.

@hutchm92 2 жыл бұрын

I really enjoyed learning about my family with this video. Seems like you know them and their tricks. I’ve had to remove my narcissistic tendencies. They don’t work when you’re trying to have healthy relationships. I am have learned from the best… but I’m very committed to being a better person & want my loved ones to have a wonderful experience being around me. However, I almost spit out my water with the last trait…don’t bother me with the facts, I’ve already made up my mind. Gosh do you know my mother! 😂 Thank you for providing such a great community service.

@user-zy8gk2nn7d 2 жыл бұрын

perfectly explained - thank you:)

@jenniferoleary-erlich1420 Жыл бұрын

Your channel is so amazing and helpful. I have been doing ALOT of research about narcissists online for the last year your information just hits differently. Would love info on help with a covert MIL and how covert narcissists treat grandchildren, help for parents who can't go no contact. Thank you!

@michaeldingman9029 Жыл бұрын

This is absolutely Amazing stuff and Wild enough to be right on the button True, I have had the unpleasant experience of dealing with a individual exactly like this. Please Keep up the good work, and please continue making these informative videos for KZfaq , THANK-YOU VERY MUCH SIR. I Commend you.!!!

@danielhama4558 2 жыл бұрын

Best video ever on this topic!!!

@user-ey4rc5tu4t 2 жыл бұрын

And this is why I despise people who demand respect. Know that I do not respect anyone who demands it no matter how practiced I am at supplication

@marcdc6809 2 жыл бұрын

They'll look for faults they have themselves in everybody around them and then vigorously point them out to everybody, as if it's very important to show that their faults are omnipresent and their behaviour is normal.

@awclark3 Жыл бұрын

My ex would literally switch sides in an argument if she thought she was losing, then swear I was the one that changed sides.

@TC-gx3qn Жыл бұрын

Yikes 😬

@paulinetincknell8065 Жыл бұрын

So very interesting and yes I can relate to a lot of this as, having studied a fair bit of Psychology myself, It helps to try to make some kind of sense of these people.

@veep5712 2 жыл бұрын

Very valuable content. Thank you. The double standard is unreal in those seeped in entitlement. In my experience, they have bad boundaries, intentionally. As you illuded to in a previous video: they mistake kindness for weakness. They view your value as something they can take and abuse without any conditions or terms, and will even act like you owe it to them. The complete disrespect of others time and value, yet the double standard is often demanding "respect" through bullying or manipulative tactics. Which if examined, one doesn't get respect by force or trickery. Compliance, perhaps, or getting their way temporarily, as you mentioned with having the last word, but it is a shallow/ material-level addiction often to power or control. Which is why it seems they are never satisfied, they are addled to trying to exert over others.

@dianajane6185 2 жыл бұрын

I am glad I found your channel. 🙏 😊 Thank you.

@theincandescentman685 2 жыл бұрын

You're unique and beautiful even if you speak your truth that's against the 99%. You're doing your best. Keep it up!

@gracesavin6356 3 жыл бұрын

This is uncanny!!!! Thank you.

@jasonkresock2196 2 жыл бұрын

Outstanding Work. Thank You ❤️‍🔥🧠🌞

@jencameron8124 Жыл бұрын

Your information is fantastic, Darren! Thank you so much and cheers👍🙂

@oscarwilliamson6163 Жыл бұрын

Jen Campbell,You are beautiful,Hope you are not with a narcissist......

@darrynreid4500 2 жыл бұрын

I wanted to take a pre-emptive crack at the question: I would say that they believe that everyone else's agendas - including thoughts, feelings, preferences, goals and and plans - are to be defined by however they happen to feel.

@barbaraj. 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this🙏🏼

@Dustandfuzz 2 жыл бұрын

I dumped a narc friend so many times and tried again so many times, but all the narc noted and mentioned was how many times over the decades that I dumped him. Well my thing is if I hadn’t tried so many times with him, I wouldn’t have had to dump him. It would have been only once. But my trying again and again just went unnoticed. That tells me just like you said, they are never at fault.

@monteblazilla7776 2 жыл бұрын

Here in Las Vegas! I'm at the hardest part in my life rn, ive blocked her on all social media sites i jus changed my phone number today. Staying with her and her family has drained me to the point of no return. Im set to leave and live out my car next month though, rent tooo expensive lol. Y'all all stay positive we gone get thru this💪🏾

@LucyFre 2 жыл бұрын

Covert vounerable is worst. You can't please him , rich to him( her) . You are never good enough. When conflict arrive you'll see their real face.And you feel guilty that you do something wrong

@MJ-qb5ph 2 жыл бұрын

Mine almost drove me to suicide

@LucyFre 2 жыл бұрын

@@MJ-qb5ph I got the same

@raquelfrizzell 2 жыл бұрын

@@MJ-qb5ph I am also suicidal. I think about it everyday. The covert narc I live with is driving me insane, I'm in hell.

@MJ-qb5ph 2 жыл бұрын

@@raquelfrizzell sorry to hear that. Can you get out and enforce no contact? Mine was family so different to intimate relationship